Is Karen considered a racial slur?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a middle aged white woman and do not consider it a racial slur. Karens are busybodies and misdemeanor vigilantes against minorities. Not sure why other middle age women want to defend this behavior and label it racist?

Because some people feel entitled to continue their bad behavior.

I feel like it started as a remark to police women who are being entitled and racist (unfortunately named, given how many people actually DO have the name Karen).

It is now a word to tell white, middle aged women specifically that they are being uppity and should sit down and accept whatever they are given in a way that alludes to racism, but isn't necessarily racist in itself (what the women are saying).

For example, in the hot coffee situation. If I am asking or hotter coffee, does that make me a Karen? Because now I think common usage would say "yes" if I am a middle-aged white woman. If I am telling a young black man I am going to get them fired for the lukewarm story, THAT is worth shutting down.

It all depends on how you ask.

There are ways of “using your voice” that don’t sound entitled or abusive.

BS. There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right. Just make the coffee the correct way and there won't be any problems. But serving lukewarm crap and expecting customers to sheepishly accept it and shuffle away is ridiculous. If you suck at your job, maybe find another. But the person pointing out that the coffee is bad is not the problem.

BS. It’s 100% in the way someone asks.

How can you say 100%? The word is tossed around very easily. And no, it's not deserved 100% of the time. Obviously.

99.9%

It is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”.

If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

I think you're pretty out to lunch on how often the word is used. I was recently at a drive thru and one of my kids noticed something wasn't in our bag. So I pulled over to check and said if it was forgotten we would go back and ask for it. He said I can't do that because I would be called a Karen. Turns out we weren't charged for it anyway so we just left since I didn't want to go back through the line. Why would asking for an item I paid for, if that's what had indeed happened brand me a "Karen" but that's where we 're at. You're not up to speed on this.

Sounds like you have a history of being rude to staff.

Uh no, but that's how the kids use the word. Guess you haven't been around any recently.

This is also my point. For whatever reason, Karen now = a person who asks for something and embarasses their kids. At least among my kids. Racism doesn't really have anything to do with it for them. although they may think it does.

Yes, this exactly. Teens are just mortified by their parents anyway, so having to speak up around them for any reason is something they want to avoid. I'd rather teach my kids that problems can be solved by asking nicely and it's not really a big deal. Everything doesn't turn into a viral screed like something they've seen online.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Yes. It is directed at one race in particular.

+1. This is an awful slur that is for some reason tolerated. I appreciate that teacher shutting it down.

This is a bit dramatic, and honestly exactly the reason people use it to describe a certain kind of person. It's on the level of calling someone a busy body. Calling it a slur is disrespectful to the experience of people who actually get slurs lobbed at them, and is typical centering behavior of exactly the kind of person who gets called a Karen.

I view “Karen” as a way to silence women. Particularly middle aged, white women. So maybe you don’t think it’s a slur, but I do.

Also, women right here on this website have expressed fear that speaking up about anything will get them labeled a “Karen”. It’s not ok to silence women in this way. Use your words if you think someone is misbehaving. Using a slur like “Karen” is frankly just lazy and dumb.

Karen is a word 🙄 It's not actually hurting you.

Would you say that about all words?

Karen is also someone’s NAME. I personally think that is wrong to use someone’s name like in such an unkind way.

[Anonymous]

While much is made of teens using the word because their moms existing in the world is embarrassing to them (definitely happens), I don’t think all young people are on board and some see it as sexist.

My gen X cousin used it in front of her gen z daughter and she gave her an explainer on why it’s a misogynistic term used to embarrass women for asking for anything. This is just to say it’s not a universally accepted term among all young people

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a middle aged white woman and do not consider it a racial slur. Karens are busybodies and misdemeanor vigilantes against minorities. Not sure why other middle age women want to defend this behavior and label it racist?

Because some people feel entitled to continue their bad behavior.

I feel like it started as a remark to police women who are being entitled and racist (unfortunately named, given how many people actually DO have the name Karen).

It is now a word to tell white, middle aged women specifically that they are being uppity and should sit down and accept whatever they are given in a way that alludes to racism, but isn't necessarily racist in itself (what the women are saying).

For example, in the hot coffee situation. If I am asking or hotter coffee, does that make me a Karen? Because now I think common usage would say "yes" if I am a middle-aged white woman. If I am telling a young black man I am going to get them fired for the lukewarm story, THAT is worth shutting down.

It all depends on how you ask.

There are ways of “using your voice” that don’t sound entitled or abusive.

BS. There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right. Just make the coffee the correct way and there won't be any problems. But serving lukewarm crap and expecting customers to sheepishly accept it and shuffle away is ridiculous. If you suck at your job, maybe find another. But the person pointing out that the coffee is bad is not the problem.

BS. It’s 100% in the way someone asks.

How can you say 100%? The word is tossed around very easily. And no, it's not deserved 100% of the time. Obviously.

99.9%

It is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”.

If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

I think you're pretty out to lunch on how often the word is used. I was recently at a drive thru and one of my kids noticed something wasn't in our bag. So I pulled over to check and said if it was forgotten we would go back and ask for it. He said I can't do that because I would be called a Karen. Turns out we weren't charged for it anyway so we just left since I didn't want to go back through the line. Why would asking for an item I paid for, if that's what had indeed happened brand me a "Karen" but that's where we 're at. You're not up to speed on this.

No, I'm commenting based on how people I know, including my kids, use it.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a middle aged white woman and do not consider it a racial slur. Karens are busybodies and misdemeanor vigilantes against minorities. Not sure why other middle age women want to defend this behavior and label it racist?

Because some people feel entitled to continue their bad behavior.

I feel like it started as a remark to police women who are being entitled and racist (unfortunately named, given how many people actually DO have the name Karen).

It is now a word to tell white, middle aged women specifically that they are being uppity and should sit down and accept whatever they are given in a way that alludes to racism, but isn't necessarily racist in itself (what the women are saying).

For example, in the hot coffee situation. If I am asking or hotter coffee, does that make me a Karen? Because now I think common usage would say "yes" if I am a middle-aged white woman. If I am telling a young black man I am going to get them fired for the lukewarm story, THAT is worth shutting down.

It all depends on how you ask.

There are ways of “using your voice” that don’t sound entitled or abusive.

BS. There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right. Just make the coffee the correct way and there won't be any problems. But serving lukewarm crap and expecting customers to sheepishly accept it and shuffle away is ridiculous. If you suck at your job, maybe find another. But the person pointing out that the coffee is bad is not the problem.

BS. It’s 100% in the way someone asks.

How can you say 100%? The word is tossed around very easily. And no, it's not deserved 100% of the time. Obviously.

99.9%

It is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”.

If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

I think you're pretty out to lunch on how often the word is used. I was recently at a drive thru and one of my kids noticed something wasn't in our bag. So I pulled over to check and said if it was forgotten we would go back and ask for it. He said I can't do that because I would be called a Karen. Turns out we weren't charged for it anyway so we just left since I didn't want to go back through the line. Why would asking for an item I paid for, if that's what had indeed happened brand me a "Karen" but that's where we 're at. You're not up to speed on this.

This is what bothers me. My own kids seem to think they are policing my ability to for what I have literally paid for, and I don't think society is encouraging them to do the same for their dad. How does that transfer into what girls and boys internalize about what they are entitled to? (PS, I also can't remember ever complaining about a lukewarm coffee, but if you ask for hot coffee, I really don't think that is racism most of the time. And I don't even think it's over-entitlement).

My kids told my dad to stop being a Karen at dinner because he was harassing the server with 1000 requests. They also called my 20yo killjoy niece a boomer. They DGAF about age/gender. They are describing the behavior, not the person.

There is actual terrible misogyny in our world right now. Complaining about people who get called out for excessively complaining is very Karen.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Rich white women want to be oppressed so bad.

Some. Not all.

I could be considered this -- a rich white woman. (Although I am poor by DCUM standards- HHI about 150,000). And is my situation worse than a poor black woman's, on average? Hell no. Do I experience discrimination, especially in situations in which my education/wealth isn't apparent? 1000%

Do you flex your “power” when you talk down to others?

Well, my first instinct is to say no -- not consciously.
But if I reflect more, maybe I do? For example: I have a chronically ill child. I know how to manage their condition. A person at a lab recently gave instructions for something that would result in my kid having inaccurate test results. The woman who was administering (also white, if it matter) was very insistent. I called the doctor and had the doctor tell the woman the woman was doing the test wrong. Does that count?

Depends on how you said it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:Yes. Racist and sexist. When you take a term associated with a specific race, age, gender, or nationality and use it to negatively describe an action, that term is a slur.

A “Karen” refers to a white, older woman. Using a term that reflects age, race, and gender to denigrate another is using the term as a slur.

Our society doesn’t look at it like a slur, because it’s seen as socially acceptable to denigrate white women. Same with the term “Becky”.

I call people out on it all the time. We should be encouraging women to use their voices.

100, even when -- or maybe especially when -- that is a group of women who have been silenced and told that what they have should is good enough for them.

Karens are infraction vigilantes, we don’t need “hall monitors” in society. I don’t encourage this speaking and those [people] need to stop trying to control others.

+1 (with correction)

[Anonymous]

No. It's not possible to be racist against those people.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a middle aged white woman and do not consider it a racial slur. Karens are busybodies and misdemeanor vigilantes against minorities. Not sure why other middle age women want to defend this behavior and label it racist?

Because some people feel entitled to continue their bad behavior.

I feel like it started as a remark to police women who are being entitled and racist (unfortunately named, given how many people actually DO have the name Karen).

It is now a word to tell white, middle aged women specifically that they are being uppity and should sit down and accept whatever they are given in a way that alludes to racism, but isn't necessarily racist in itself (what the women are saying).

For example, in the hot coffee situation. If I am asking or hotter coffee, does that make me a Karen? Because now I think common usage would say "yes" if I am a middle-aged white woman. If I am telling a young black man I am going to get them fired for the lukewarm story, THAT is worth shutting down.

It all depends on how you ask.

There are ways of “using your voice” that don’t sound entitled or abusive.

BS. There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right. Just make the coffee the correct way and there won't be any problems. But serving lukewarm crap and expecting customers to sheepishly accept it and shuffle away is ridiculous. If you suck at your job, maybe find another. But the person pointing out that the coffee is bad is not the problem.

BS. It’s 100% in the way someone asks.

How can you say 100%? The word is tossed around very easily. And no, it's not deserved 100% of the time. Obviously.

99.9%

It is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”.

If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

I think you're pretty out to lunch on how often the word is used. I was recently at a drive thru and one of my kids noticed something wasn't in our bag. So I pulled over to check and said if it was forgotten we would go back and ask for it. He said I can't do that because I would be called a Karen. Turns out we weren't charged for it anyway so we just left since I didn't want to go back through the line. Why would asking for an item I paid for, if that's what had indeed happened brand me a "Karen" but that's where we 're at. You're not up to speed on this.

No, I'm commenting based on how people I know, including my kids, use it.

Then why are you making sweeping generalizations about how its used 100% of the time? Its just your very limited experience and sample size that is very different from what others are describing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No. I use it on anyone who is entitled and aggressive.

Even men?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Yes. Racist and sexist. When you take a term associated with a specific race, age, gender, or nationality and use it to negatively describe an action, that term is a slur.

A “Karen” refers to a white, older woman. Using a term that reflects age, race, and gender to denigrate another is using the term as a slur.

Our society doesn’t look at it like a slur, because it’s seen as socially acceptable to denigrate white women. Same with the term “Becky”.

I call people out on it all the time. We should be encouraging women to use their voices.

100, even when -- or maybe especially when -- that is a group of women who have been silenced and told that what they have should is good enough for them.

Karens are infraction vigilantes, we don’t need “hall monitors” in society. I don’t encourage this speaking and those [people] need to stop trying to control others.

+1 (with correction)

Do we need hall monitors to correct the hall monitors? Maybe just leave people alone.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I’m a middle aged white woman and do not consider it a racial slur. Karens are busybodies and misdemeanor vigilantes against minorities. Not sure why other middle age women want to defend this behavior and label it racist?

Because some people feel entitled to continue their bad behavior.

I feel like it started as a remark to police women who are being entitled and racist (unfortunately named, given how many people actually DO have the name Karen).

It is now a word to tell white, middle aged women specifically that they are being uppity and should sit down and accept whatever they are given in a way that alludes to racism, but isn't necessarily racist in itself (what the women are saying).

For example, in the hot coffee situation. If I am asking or hotter coffee, does that make me a Karen? Because now I think common usage would say "yes" if I am a middle-aged white woman. If I am telling a young black man I am going to get them fired for the lukewarm story, THAT is worth shutting down.

It all depends on how you ask.

There are ways of “using your voice” that don’t sound entitled or abusive.

BS. There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right. Just make the coffee the correct way and there won't be any problems. But serving lukewarm crap and expecting customers to sheepishly accept it and shuffle away is ridiculous. If you suck at your job, maybe find another. But the person pointing out that the coffee is bad is not the problem.

BS. It’s 100% in the way someone asks.

How can you say 100%? The word is tossed around very easily. And no, it's not deserved 100% of the time. Obviously.

99.9%

It is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”.

If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

I think you're pretty out to lunch on how often the word is used. I was recently at a drive thru and one of my kids noticed something wasn't in our bag. So I pulled over to check and said if it was forgotten we would go back and ask for it. He said I can't do that because I would be called a Karen. Turns out we weren't charged for it anyway so we just left since I didn't want to go back through the line. Why would asking for an item I paid for, if that's what had indeed happened brand me a "Karen" but that's where we 're at. You're not up to speed on this.

No, I'm commenting based on how people I know, including my kids, use it.

Then why are you making sweeping generalizations about how its used 100% of the time? Its just your very limited experience and sample size that is very different from what others are describing?

Again, it is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”. If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a middle aged white woman and do not consider it a racial slur. Karens are busybodies and misdemeanor vigilantes against minorities. Not sure why other middle age women want to defend this behavior and label it racist?

Because some people feel entitled to continue their bad behavior.

I feel like it started as a remark to police women who are being entitled and racist (unfortunately named, given how many people actually DO have the name Karen).

It is now a word to tell white, middle aged women specifically that they are being uppity and should sit down and accept whatever they are given in a way that alludes to racism, but isn't necessarily racist in itself (what the women are saying).

For example, in the hot coffee situation. If I am asking or hotter coffee, does that make me a Karen? Because now I think common usage would say "yes" if I am a middle-aged white woman. If I am telling a young black man I am going to get them fired for the lukewarm story, THAT is worth shutting down.

It all depends on how you ask.

There are ways of “using your voice” that don’t sound entitled or abusive.

BS. There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right. Just make the coffee the correct way and there won't be any problems. But serving lukewarm crap and expecting customers to sheepishly accept it and shuffle away is ridiculous. If you suck at your job, maybe find another. But the person pointing out that the coffee is bad is not the problem.

BS. It’s 100% in the way someone asks.

How can you say 100%? The word is tossed around very easily. And no, it's not deserved 100% of the time. Obviously.

99.9%

It is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”.

If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

I think you're pretty out to lunch on how often the word is used. I was recently at a drive thru and one of my kids noticed something wasn't in our bag. So I pulled over to check and said if it was forgotten we would go back and ask for it. He said I can't do that because I would be called a Karen. Turns out we weren't charged for it anyway so we just left since I didn't want to go back through the line. Why would asking for an item I paid for, if that's what had indeed happened brand me a "Karen" but that's where we 're at. You're not up to speed on this.

This is what bothers me. My own kids seem to think they are policing my ability to for what I have literally paid for, and I don't think society is encouraging them to do the same for their dad. How does that transfer into what girls and boys internalize about what they are entitled to? (PS, I also can't remember ever complaining about a lukewarm coffee, but if you ask for hot coffee, I really don't think that is racism most of the time. And I don't even think it's over-entitlement).

My kids told my dad to stop being a Karen at dinner because he was harassing the server with 1000 requests. They also called my 20yo killjoy niece a boomer. They DGAF about age/gender. They are describing the behavior, not the person.

There is actual terrible misogyny in our world right now. Complaining about people who get called out for excessively complaining is very Karen.

Your dad is not a woman and so it is sexist to call him Karen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Yes. Racist and sexist. When you take a term associated with a specific race, age, gender, or nationality and use it to negatively describe an action, that term is a slur.

A “Karen” refers to a white, older woman. Using a term that reflects age, race, and gender to denigrate another is using the term as a slur.

Our society doesn’t look at it like a slur, because it’s seen as socially acceptable to denigrate white women. Same with the term “Becky”.

I call people out on it all the time. We should be encouraging women to use their voices.

100, even when -- or maybe especially when -- that is a group of women who have been silenced and told that what they have should is good enough for them.

Karens are infraction vigilantes, we don’t need “hall monitors” in society. I don’t encourage this speaking and those [people] need to stop trying to control others.

+1 (with correction)

Do we need hall monitors to correct the hall monitors? Maybe just leave people alone.

That's the entire point.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a middle aged white woman and do not consider it a racial slur. Karens are busybodies and misdemeanor vigilantes against minorities. Not sure why other middle age women want to defend this behavior and label it racist?

Because some people feel entitled to continue their bad behavior.

I feel like it started as a remark to police women who are being entitled and racist (unfortunately named, given how many people actually DO have the name Karen).

It is now a word to tell white, middle aged women specifically that they are being uppity and should sit down and accept whatever they are given in a way that alludes to racism, but isn't necessarily racist in itself (what the women are saying).

For example, in the hot coffee situation. If I am asking or hotter coffee, does that make me a Karen? Because now I think common usage would say "yes" if I am a middle-aged white woman. If I am telling a young black man I am going to get them fired for the lukewarm story, THAT is worth shutting down.

It all depends on how you ask.

There are ways of “using your voice” that don’t sound entitled or abusive.

BS. There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right. Just make the coffee the correct way and there won't be any problems. But serving lukewarm crap and expecting customers to sheepishly accept it and shuffle away is ridiculous. If you suck at your job, maybe find another. But the person pointing out that the coffee is bad is not the problem.

BS. It’s 100% in the way someone asks.

How can you say 100%? The word is tossed around very easily. And no, it's not deserved 100% of the time. Obviously.

99.9%

It is 100% NOT “There is nothing some women of a certain age can do right”.

If someone is constantly getting that feedback in all areas of their life then that person should reflect on how they interact with others.

I think you're pretty out to lunch on how often the word is used. I was recently at a drive thru and one of my kids noticed something wasn't in our bag. So I pulled over to check and said if it was forgotten we would go back and ask for it. He said I can't do that because I would be called a Karen. Turns out we weren't charged for it anyway so we just left since I didn't want to go back through the line. Why would asking for an item I paid for, if that's what had indeed happened brand me a "Karen" but that's where we 're at. You're not up to speed on this.

This is what bothers me. My own kids seem to think they are policing my ability to for what I have literally paid for, and I don't think society is encouraging them to do the same for their dad. How does that transfer into what girls and boys internalize about what they are entitled to? (PS, I also can't remember ever complaining about a lukewarm coffee, but if you ask for hot coffee, I really don't think that is racism most of the time. And I don't even think it's over-entitlement).

My kids told my dad to stop being a Karen at dinner because he was harassing the server with 1000 requests. They also called my 20yo killjoy niece a boomer. They DGAF about age/gender. They are describing the behavior, not the person.

There is actual terrible misogyny in our world right now. Complaining about people who get called out for excessively complaining is very Karen.

Your dad is not a woman and so it is sexist to call him Karen.

Uh, no, it's not.

Some people on this thread seem to misunderstand the word "sexist" and "racist".