Dax Tejera’s widow’s arrest for child endangerment

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess a fire could happen (just as it can happen in a home, on a plane, etc) but that’s really rare in hotels. I think the last US hotel fire of note was in 2006.

Fire alarms happen in hotels all the time. I’ve had to evacuate a hotel recently. The siren was EARSPLITTING and it went on for 20 minutes or more. My ears rang for hours afterward. Even if the alarm was false alarm, no way would the kids sleep through it and who knows what the 2 year old would do? Try to leave (as any sane person would to try to escape the noise). There’s no way to lock a kid inside a hotel room and if the kid left the room they could get a long way before the parent could get back from a block away.

+1

I think some people on this thread defending the parents have no idea how often fire alarms go off in hotels. PP is right -- it happens frequently, mostly false alarms, but good God, think how a toddler who was alone might react to it. Many a terrible potential outcome--running around looking for the parents in a strange room or suite, maybe trying even to get the infant out of the crib to "help," anything. Not to mention if the kid got out of the room and ran in panic who knows where. It's incredibly naive for people to shrug and say, an actual fire is "really rare in hotels" like one person here claimed. Real fires may be relatively rare but (1) it only takes the ONE time for your kid to be injured or killed in that rare, real fire. (2) Yes, a fire can happen in your home; but most of us should be able to exit a one-or two-level house, or most apartments other than high-rises, FAR faster than we could exit a multi-story downtown Manhattan hotel. (3) If there's a false fire alarm blaring, the outcome for a frantic child left alone could still be terrible.

I don’t think people are defending the parents, just pointing out that the actual risk of harm in this scenario is not huge. Two different things.

Did you even read the post to which you're responding? Beyond the first sentence? It lays out potential ways that "the actual risk of harm" exists in these scenarios, including the scenario where there is no actual fire but a false alarm terrifies a child into behaviors that would end in harm.

Do you also think it's no big deal that two PPs with experience in the hotel industry say many more people have access to your hotel room than most guests realize? Or do you figure there's little harm in that, either?

Indeed I did. And I’m rational enough to recognize that kids are at more risk riding in cars, which many of us do on a regular basis, than in either of the hypotheticals put forward.

How do you know this? I’d like to see data. Specifically, the risk to a baby and a toddler who are left completely alone for hours in a room in a hotel full of strangers, many of whom have a key to the room and which room cannot be locked from the outside (meaning the 2 year old can leave at any time). My DC could (and did) open doors at that age. I’m “rational enough” to know that the risk is pretty high. Which is why it’s illegal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:5 month old & two year old left in a NYC apartment alone while husband & wife went out.

No excuse. Jail time for mommy.

+1

This is the bottom line.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess a fire could happen (just as it can happen in a home, on a plane, etc) but that’s really rare in hotels. I think the last US hotel fire of note was in 2006.

Fire alarms happen in hotels all the time. I’ve had to evacuate a hotel recently. The siren was EARSPLITTING and it went on for 20 minutes or more. My ears rang for hours afterward. Even if the alarm was false alarm, no way would the kids sleep through it and who knows what the 2 year old would do? Try to leave (as any sane person would to try to escape the noise). There’s no way to lock a kid inside a hotel room and if the kid left the room they could get a long way before the parent could get back from a block away.

+1

I think some people on this thread defending the parents have no idea how often fire alarms go off in hotels. PP is right -- it happens frequently, mostly false alarms, but good God, think how a toddler who was alone might react to it. Many a terrible potential outcome--running around looking for the parents in a strange room or suite, maybe trying even to get the infant out of the crib to "help," anything. Not to mention if the kid got out of the room and ran in panic who knows where. It's incredibly naive for people to shrug and say, an actual fire is "really rare in hotels" like one person here claimed. Real fires may be relatively rare but (1) it only takes the ONE time for your kid to be injured or killed in that rare, real fire. (2) Yes, a fire can happen in your home; but most of us should be able to exit a one-or two-level house, or most apartments other than high-rises, FAR faster than we could exit a multi-story downtown Manhattan hotel. (3) If there's a false fire alarm blaring, the outcome for a frantic child left alone could still be terrible.

I don’t think people are defending the parents, just pointing out that the actual risk of harm in this scenario is not huge. Two different things.

Did you even read the post to which you're responding? Beyond the first sentence? It lays out potential ways that "the actual risk of harm" exists in these scenarios, including the scenario where there is no actual fire but a false alarm terrifies a child into behaviors that would end in harm.

Do you also think it's no big deal that two PPs with experience in the hotel industry say many more people have access to your hotel room than most guests realize? Or do you figure there's little harm in that, either?

Indeed I did. And I’m rational enough to recognize that kids are at more risk riding in cars, which many of us do on a regular basis, than in either of the hypotheticals put forward.

How do you know this? I’d like to see data. Specifically, the risk to a baby and a toddler who are left completely alone for hours in a room in a hotel full of strangers, many of whom have a key to the room and which room cannot be locked from the outside (meaning the 2 year old can leave at any time). My DC could (and did) open doors at that age. I’m “rational enough” to know that the risk is pretty high. Which is why it’s illegal.

+1 and why school personnel would report if an older child in the family shared this info

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It is all just so unfortunate and the optics are bad. This is not a single mother on WIC. I can’t imagine the guilt compounded by the media dog-pile; they were both neglectful parents, but one is dead and he has the benefit of being male. It is important to separate the two events. She didn’t kill her husband and the Universe wasn’t punishing her for being a crappy MOM; however much the masses enjoy a tidy retribution story.

How are the optics bad? Rich couple staying in a fancy hotel in NYC could easily have afforded a babysitter and chosen instead to not only leave the kids in a hotel but one a block away. This is pure neglect and she should be criminally charged and found guilty. If she were poor, or of color or someone else, those kids would never go back to her and be placed for adoption.

Your point is valid. However, no chance that the kids would be taken away and put up for adoption whether poor or not. Takes a lot to lose custody. A lot.

yes, they would be.

Oh grow up you are full of nonsense. I am a former states attorney who handled hundreds of dependency neglect cases and knows the system and the uniform laws that most states follow up down and inside out. It takes YEARS to terminate parental rights and place children out for adoption, with extensive a services and interventions required along the way to establish reunification attempts have been thoroughly exhausted. But most relevant, it is very unlikely a child would be removed for any length of time (a short term removal for investigation might occur) for this reason. Leaving young children unattended is sadly a far too common behavior of parents of all income brackets and education levels. Some parents are stunningly selfish and stupid about the psychological needs of very young children, like how a toddler waking up alone in a hotel room unable to find her parents could suffer an abandonment wound that she struggles for years to recover from. But that kind of commonplace neglect/abuse would clog the system if every parent was held accountable.

NP. My black brother effectively lost his kids for two years while serving a prison sentence for possession of marijuana while having his kids in a car during a routine traffic stop. He wasn’t smoking it or under the influence. He had weed in the car and also a 5 year old. He got possession and child endangerment charges. He is now a convicted felon after spending two years in prison. We are not the same.

[Anonymous]

Medical examiner says that Tejera choked as a result of acute alcohol ingestion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Medical examiner says that Tejera choked as a result of acute alcohol ingestion.

Sweet Jesus. How long had they left their kids alone in the hotel room? OMG. They lied and said he had a heart attack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Medical examiner says that Tejera choked as a result of acute alcohol ingestion.

[Anonymous]

This is horrible. You leave your kids alone in a hotel to go get wasted, so much that you pass out and die? WTH.

[Anonymous]

Did his wife really think no one would ever find out what actually happened? Obviously, the paramedics didn’t say it was a heart attack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is horrible. You leave your kids alone in a hotel to go get wasted, so much that you pass out and die? WTH.

I think he choked and the fact that he was wasted was a contributing factor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is horrible. You leave your kids alone in a hotel to go get wasted, so much that you pass out and die? WTH.

I think he choked and the fact that he was wasted was a contributing factor.

I mean whatever the details, it was a horrible judgment call.

[Anonymous]

I truly do not understand WHY people have kids and think they can do DINK stuff.

[Anonymous]

Has the wife now admitted that they left the kids to go out with friends?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It is all just so unfortunate and the optics are bad. This is not a single mother on WIC. I can’t imagine the guilt compounded by the media dog-pile; they were both neglectful parents, but one is dead and he has the benefit of being male. It is important to separate the two events. She didn’t kill her husband and the Universe wasn’t punishing her for being a crappy MOM; however much the masses enjoy a tidy retribution story.

How are the optics bad? Rich couple staying in a fancy hotel in NYC could easily have afforded a babysitter and chosen instead to not only leave the kids in a hotel but one a block away. This is pure neglect and she should be criminally charged and found guilty. If she were poor, or of color or someone else, those kids would never go back to her and be placed for adoption.

Your point is valid. However, no chance that the kids would be taken away and put up for adoption whether poor or not. Takes a lot to lose custody. A lot.

yes, they would be.

Oh grow up you are full of nonsense. I am a former states attorney who handled hundreds of dependency neglect cases and knows the system and the uniform laws that most states follow up down and inside out. It takes YEARS to terminate parental rights and place children out for adoption, with extensive a services and interventions required along the way to establish reunification attempts have been thoroughly exhausted. But most relevant, it is very unlikely a child would be removed for any length of time (a short term removal for investigation might occur) for this reason. Leaving young children unattended is sadly a far too common behavior of parents of all income brackets and education levels. Some parents are stunningly selfish and stupid about the psychological needs of very young children, like how a toddler waking up alone in a hotel room unable to find her parents could suffer an abandonment wound that she struggles for years to recover from. But that kind of commonplace neglect/abuse would clog the system if every parent was held accountable.

NP. My black brother effectively lost his kids for two years while serving a prison sentence for possession of marijuana while having his kids in a car during a routine traffic stop. He wasn’t smoking it or under the influence. He had weed in the car and also a 5 year old. He got possession and child endangerment charges. He is now a convicted felon after spending two years in prison. We are not the same.

It was illegal. I hope you stepped up and took the kids if they were not with mom.

[Anonymous]

Sidebar: how long can ABC News President Kim Goodwin last? She just barely survived the debacle with the morning news anchors and now she is caught having put out a statement saying this guy died of a heart attack. Even if she had bad information, it looks terrible. She is the head of a NEWS organization, for goodness sake!!