do college admissions get ugly at the Big3 when all the parents are Ivy grads?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Are you really suggesting that high school freshman and sophomores should be asking seniors in the month of May where they are going to college? Come on.

Also, what do you mean by "supposed"? You think people are making this up? It is relevant to students to know where older students whom they admired ended up going to college. My own student has stated this to me. Also, you are ignoring the fact that many other schools do in fact publish this information. So there is more secrecy at Sidwell.

Then they should ask the student they admired. It is a small school, they all know each other. Really what difference does it make if the person they admired went to Michigan or Amherst? Will it improve their chances? Will it make them prefer a big school to a small school? Come on, man.

Do you actually remember what it was like to be 16 years old? My kid has told me that they would like to know where older students with whom they were in a language class or played on the same team ended up. That's part of being a teenager. You see a little bit of yourself in older peers whom you admire, and it gives kids perspective as they start to think about the process for themselves in a way that is not just theoretical. It's all part of being in a community.

Also, saying that they should ask the student in May is idiotic. I wouldn't want my freshman or sophomore to be thinking about it at that point, and who is actually going to be the sophomore asking seniors about this? Also, if you had any connection to Sidwell (which at this point I doubt) you would know that seniors are barely on campus by the time college destinations are determined.

Again, most schools publish such a list. Why doesn't Sidwell?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's an aggregate list. I think PPs are talking about which individuals ended up where?

Which is only the business of the students. It is weird that there is a demand to know what students when to what specific schools. If it isn't your kid or a friend of the family (in which case, you would know) what difference does it make?

These aggregate lists provide enough of a sample for people to figure out generally where kids go to college.

+1

No school makes a list of where individual students matriculate available to anyone. If the kids want to post where they're going on a class Instagram account or something like that, that's their choice, but the school has no business making that information available.

Most schools absolutely publish such a list in their magazine.

As we are beginning our own college exploration process, my Sidwell junior has commented that it would be helpful to see the destinations of last year's senior class, to give them perspective on where students ended up generally and also specifically to see where students they looked up to and admire are in school. That is an aspect of what peer leadership is all about, to the question of what difference does it make.

What difference does it make where the admired student went to school? What if they decided to go to Clemson instead of an ivy? Will your Junior think less of them or follow in their footsteps?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Are you really suggesting that high school freshman and sophomores should be asking seniors in the month of May where they are going to college? Come on.

Also, what do you mean by "supposed"? You think people are making this up? It is relevant to students to know where older students whom they admired ended up going to college. My own student has stated this to me. Also, you are ignoring the fact that many other schools do in fact publish this information. So there is more secrecy at Sidwell.

Then they should ask the student they admired. It is a small school, they all know each other. Really what difference does it make if the person they admired went to Michigan or Amherst? Will it improve their chances? Will it make them prefer a big school to a small school? Come on, man.

Do you actually remember what it was like to be 16 years old? My kid has told me that they would like to know where older students with whom they were in a language class or played on the same team ended up. That's part of being a teenager. You see a little bit of yourself in older peers whom you admire, and it gives kids perspective as they start to think about the process for themselves in a way that is not just theoretical. It's all part of being in a community.

Also, saying that they should ask the student in May is idiotic. I wouldn't want my freshman or sophomore to be thinking about it at that point, and who is actually going to be the sophomore asking seniors about this? Also, if you had any connection to Sidwell (which at this point I doubt) you would know that seniors are barely on campus by the time college destinations are determined.

Again, most schools publish such a list. Why doesn't Sidwell?

Yes, when I was a junior, I asked my friends who were seniors where they were going. It wasn't hard. But just because bobby went to flagship U didn't change my desire to go to Midwest SLAC or whatever. No bearing whatsoever. Your kid is their own person and should develop a list based on their own criteria.

The seniors at Sidwell will oftent post letter of rejection in the senior lounge, Your kid can go check it out in May when the seniors are gone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's an aggregate list. I think PPs are talking about which individuals ended up where?

Which is only the business of the students. It is weird that there is a demand to know what students when to what specific schools. If it isn't your kid or a friend of the family (in which case, you would know) what difference does it make?

These aggregate lists provide enough of a sample for people to figure out generally where kids go to college.

+1

No school makes a list of where individual students matriculate available to anyone. If the kids want to post where they're going on a class Instagram account or something like that, that's their choice, but the school has no business making that information available.

Most schools absolutely publish such a list in their magazine.

As we are beginning our own college exploration process, my Sidwell junior has commented that it would be helpful to see the destinations of last year's senior class, to give them perspective on where students ended up generally and also specifically to see where students they looked up to and admire are in school. That is an aspect of what peer leadership is all about, to the question of what difference does it make.

What difference does it make where the admired student went to school? What if they decided to go to Clemson instead of an ivy? Will your Junior think less of them or follow in their footsteps?

Why doesn't Sidwell publish a list like most other schools do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Are you really suggesting that high school freshman and sophomores should be asking seniors in the month of May where they are going to college? Come on.

Also, what do you mean by "supposed"? You think people are making this up? It is relevant to students to know where older students whom they admired ended up going to college. My own student has stated this to me. Also, you are ignoring the fact that many other schools do in fact publish this information. So there is more secrecy at Sidwell.

Then they should ask the student they admired. It is a small school, they all know each other. Really what difference does it make if the person they admired went to Michigan or Amherst? Will it improve their chances? Will it make them prefer a big school to a small school? Come on, man.

Do you actually remember what it was like to be 16 years old? My kid has told me that they would like to know where older students with whom they were in a language class or played on the same team ended up. That's part of being a teenager. You see a little bit of yourself in older peers whom you admire, and it gives kids perspective as they start to think about the process for themselves in a way that is not just theoretical. It's all part of being in a community.

Also, saying that they should ask the student in May is idiotic. I wouldn't want my freshman or sophomore to be thinking about it at that point, and who is actually going to be the sophomore asking seniors about this? Also, if you had any connection to Sidwell (which at this point I doubt) you would know that seniors are barely on campus by the time college destinations are determined.

Again, most schools publish such a list. Why doesn't Sidwell?

Maybe Sidwell is not a good fit for your family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Are you really suggesting that high school freshman and sophomores should be asking seniors in the month of May where they are going to college? Come on.

Also, what do you mean by "supposed"? You think people are making this up? It is relevant to students to know where older students whom they admired ended up going to college. My own student has stated this to me. Also, you are ignoring the fact that many other schools do in fact publish this information. So there is more secrecy at Sidwell.

Then they should ask the student they admired. It is a small school, they all know each other. Really what difference does it make if the person they admired went to Michigan or Amherst? Will it improve their chances? Will it make them prefer a big school to a small school? Come on, man.

Do you actually remember what it was like to be 16 years old? My kid has told me that they would like to know where older students with whom they were in a language class or played on the same team ended up. That's part of being a teenager. You see a little bit of yourself in older peers whom you admire, and it gives kids perspective as they start to think about the process for themselves in a way that is not just theoretical. It's all part of being in a community.

Also, saying that they should ask the student in May is idiotic. I wouldn't want my freshman or sophomore to be thinking about it at that point, and who is actually going to be the sophomore asking seniors about this? Also, if you had any connection to Sidwell (which at this point I doubt) you would know that seniors are barely on campus by the time college destinations are determined.

Again, most schools publish such a list. Why doesn't Sidwell?

Maybe Sidwell is not a good fit for your family.

Oh, right. That’s another dirt defense response. “If you don’t like that they serve dirt for lunch, maybe the school is not a good fit for your family.”

Tell me, why doesn’t Sidwell publish a list like most other schools do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Are you really suggesting that high school freshman and sophomores should be asking seniors in the month of May where they are going to college? Come on.

Also, what do you mean by "supposed"? You think people are making this up? It is relevant to students to know where older students whom they admired ended up going to college. My own student has stated this to me. Also, you are ignoring the fact that many other schools do in fact publish this information. So there is more secrecy at Sidwell.

Then they should ask the student they admired. It is a small school, they all know each other. Really what difference does it make if the person they admired went to Michigan or Amherst? Will it improve their chances? Will it make them prefer a big school to a small school? Come on, man.

Do you actually remember what it was like to be 16 years old? My kid has told me that they would like to know where older students with whom they were in a language class or played on the same team ended up. That's part of being a teenager. You see a little bit of yourself in older peers whom you admire, and it gives kids perspective as they start to think about the process for themselves in a way that is not just theoretical. It's all part of being in a community.

Also, saying that they should ask the student in May is idiotic. I wouldn't want my freshman or sophomore to be thinking about it at that point, and who is actually going to be the sophomore asking seniors about this? Also, if you had any connection to Sidwell (which at this point I doubt) you would know that seniors are barely on campus by the time college destinations are determined.

Again, most schools publish such a list. Why doesn't Sidwell?

Maybe Sidwell is not a good fit for your family.

Because they aren't helpfully transparent about colleges? And don't pull Quaker values out; that's not what it's about. We had two kids go through and like the school, but please tell me you're not a sidwell parent. Someone asks a legitimate question and you pull that awful passive aggressive, snobby response? Ick.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Are you really suggesting that high school freshman and sophomores should be asking seniors in the month of May where they are going to college? Come on.

Also, what do you mean by "supposed"? You think people are making this up? It is relevant to students to know where older students whom they admired ended up going to college. My own student has stated this to me. Also, you are ignoring the fact that many other schools do in fact publish this information. So there is more secrecy at Sidwell.

Then they should ask the student they admired. It is a small school, they all know each other. Really what difference does it make if the person they admired went to Michigan or Amherst? Will it improve their chances? Will it make them prefer a big school to a small school? Come on, man.

Do you actually remember what it was like to be 16 years old? My kid has told me that they would like to know where older students with whom they were in a language class or played on the same team ended up. That's part of being a teenager. You see a little bit of yourself in older peers whom you admire, and it gives kids perspective as they start to think about the process for themselves in a way that is not just theoretical. It's all part of being in a community.

Also, saying that they should ask the student in May is idiotic. I wouldn't want my freshman or sophomore to be thinking about it at that point, and who is actually going to be the sophomore asking seniors about this? Also, if you had any connection to Sidwell (which at this point I doubt) you would know that seniors are barely on campus by the time college destinations are determined.

Again, most schools publish such a list. Why doesn't Sidwell?

Maybe Sidwell is not a good fit for your family.

It's interesting to see how the post to which you are responding is talking about what it means to be part of a community and students looking up to their older peers, and your response is to state that Sidwell might not be a good fit for their family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That's an aggregate list. I think PPs are talking about which individuals ended up where?

Which is only the business of the students. It is weird that there is a demand to know what students when to what specific schools. If it isn't your kid or a friend of the family (in which case, you would know) what difference does it make?

These aggregate lists provide enough of a sample for people to figure out generally where kids go to college.

+1

No school makes a list of where individual students matriculate available to anyone. If the kids want to post where they're going on a class Instagram account or something like that, that's their choice, but the school has no business making that information available.

Most schools absolutely publish such a list in their magazine.

As we are beginning our own college exploration process, my Sidwell junior has commented that it would be helpful to see the destinations of last year's senior class, to give them perspective on where students ended up generally and also specifically to see where students they looked up to and admire are in school. That is an aspect of what peer leadership is all about, to the question of what difference does it make.

What difference does it make where the admired student went to school? What if they decided to go to Clemson instead of an ivy? Will your Junior think less of them or follow in their footsteps?

Why doesn't Sidwell publish a list like most other schools do?

NP here (and not affiliated with Sidwell). Which schools publish a list of where individual students are going? One poster above said NCS doesn’t. I haven’t heard of any others, either. I’m not trying to be snarky, just genuinely curious. I would be surprised if it’s “most.”

[Anonymous]

This thread is why I hate this area. Get a life!!

[Anonymous]

Sidwell parent here, and I have absolutely no clue why they don’t publish a college list. What you may have seen on Instagram is the result of a few seniors and nothing official from the school. I also don’t understand why they don’t even within the school announce the National Merit Scholar semifinalists. It may have something to do with being “Quakerly,” but on the other hand they are less bashful about announcing other celebratory things like some athletic recruiting. I would support more transparency and more celebration in general, but I can’t imagine how the change would actually come about.

[Anonymous]

My guess is the poster above who thinks Sidwell should publish an individual list doesn’t have a kid at a small private school, or at least not in the upper school yet. I have kids who have gone through a different “Big 3,” and I’m sure they can name where every student in the class above them (possibly even two classes above them) went to college. The community in these schools is like a family. Every college matriculation is celebrated, and the students are genuinely happy for each other. I’m sure this sounds hokey to people not in a school like this, but at our school it’s absolutely true.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My guess is the poster above who thinks Sidwell should publish an individual list doesn’t have a kid at a small private school, or at least not in the upper school yet. I have kids who have gone through a different “Big 3,” and I’m sure they can name where every student in the class above them (possibly even two classes above them) went to college. The community in these schools is like a family. Every college matriculation is celebrated, and the students are genuinely happy for each other. I’m sure this sounds hokey to people not in a school like this, but at our school it’s absolutely true.

I've said that I have an upper school child at Sidwell, so I'm not sure why you are "guessing." My kid definitely doesn't know this stuff and wasn't paying attention to it previously. Perhaps it is partly due to the pandemic, partly due to Sidwell culture, and also senior projects may have something to do with it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Are you really suggesting that high school freshman and sophomores should be asking seniors in the month of May where they are going to college? Come on.

Also, what do you mean by "supposed"? You think people are making this up? It is relevant to students to know where older students whom they admired ended up going to college. My own student has stated this to me. Also, you are ignoring the fact that many other schools do in fact publish this information. So there is more secrecy at Sidwell.

Then they should ask the student they admired. It is a small school, they all know each other. Really what difference does it make if the person they admired went to Michigan or Amherst? Will it improve their chances? Will it make them prefer a big school to a small school? Come on, man.

Do you actually remember what it was like to be 16 years old? My kid has told me that they would like to know where older students with whom they were in a language class or played on the same team ended up. That's part of being a teenager. You see a little bit of yourself in older peers whom you admire, and it gives kids perspective as they start to think about the process for themselves in a way that is not just theoretical. It's all part of being in a community.

Also, saying that they should ask the student in May is idiotic. I wouldn't want my freshman or sophomore to be thinking about it at that point, and who is actually going to be the sophomore asking seniors about this? Also, if you had any connection to Sidwell (which at this point I doubt) you would know that seniors are barely on campus by the time college destinations are determined.

Again, most schools publish such a list. Why doesn't Sidwell?

Maybe Sidwell is not a good fit for your family.

Sounds like it’s perfect for yours though.

[Anonymous]

And since PP keeps annoyingly asking the same question over and over, I'll ask mine again too -- why isn't the aggregate matriculation list enough? Or putting it another way, what's insufficient about it?