Leaving DC for a lower COL area

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:What types of jobs are we talking about here? What are these jobs that are only available in DC?
Some are saying that even if they find a new job outside of DC, their career will be over.
I'm really curious to know what those jobs are.

Two Fed household here. Impossible for us to leave D.C. and have both of us stay in the same field.

This is why I always encourage young people to be careful what they wish for when they take that first dc-centric job.

seriously.

also, not a great reflection on your professional skills if the federal government is literally the only employer you're capable of working for. Yiiiikes; can't imagine living that way!

This is a good point.

Is it if you consider the "cool" government jobs? I mean, my social circle includes a NASA astronomer, a park ranger at the National Mall, a unit historian for the Air Force...leaving government for them would mean doing substantively different work. There are some things the government does because we invest in them as a country that don't make a profit. I don't think that's bad.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Problem with lower COL areas is that the job market is not as robust. Yes, "everybody" know someone who moved to Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee and found a good position and cheap housing but there is nowhere near the opportunities found in growing areas. Also, lower COL places tend to be insular. You are competing with people who went to local schools, married someone from there, and will never leave there. They pick their own when an opening occurs.

That's ...wrong on just about every level. Dallas and Houston are the same size as DC, with an even better economy, record low unemployment rate and much better COL. I've lived in both and wouldn't describe either as "insular." People are pouring in from other states. And the idea a company like Toyota or AT&T is picking executives based on the neighborhood they grew up in, that's just ludicrous.

SInce when are Dallas and Houston = Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee?

Dallas and Houston have incredible economies but are very hot and 100% sprawl. No charm, history, or walkability.

Yeah right. Dallas has Deep Ellum, Bishop Arts, Lower Greenville, Uptown ...areas with as much walkability as anything you'll find in the District. And several have a funkier vibe than the
manufactured cool of many gentrifying DC neighborhoods. And yeah ...it's hot. But you can also sit outside on the patio in February and don't have to dig out from a blizzard every other year.

You've named areas in Dallas that are much like Atlanta's Five Points/Virginia Highlands -- highly industrialized with a glut of retail/restaurants in one place but they aren't walkable communities with mixed-use density that including housing and amenities artfully imposed together. Basically those are the places you take an Uber to to bar hop for happy hour but you don't live on that street or next to that restaurant nor can you walk to those grocery stores (not unless you want to cross a parking lot which can fit a couple 100 cars easily first). In other words, the Whole Foods is in a shopping plaza.

Huge difference. Basically living there is nothing like D.C.

+1000000. PP obviously has never lived in a real city. Five points in Atlanta is a perfect example. You may be able to walk to bars and restaurants from your house. But on a daily basis walk to work, walk your kids to school and run 90% of your errands on foot? No way. Especially given the hot weather. Dallas is a city built around the automobile. Even in the areas in Dallas claiming to be walkable, the parking lots are HUGE which in itself demonstrates it’s not really a walkable area.

Whereas I live in DC and almost always walk to the grocery store, combo walk and bus to work, and only use my car on the weekend for an errand or going somewhere outside of DC. I can’t imagine many families in Dallas are only using their cars on the weekend.

Meh. You still live in DC, which is full of boring people who are bland AF.

As opposed to whom? Do you live in NY or LA, perhaps?

My DC neighbors work in a variety of pretty interesting professions. I assume you’re thinking everyone’s a fed, but on my block, there are people in medicine, finance, research, education, a museum director, etc. Really runs the gamut.

I live in a small city outside of DC and it's the same as in my neighborhood.

Stay in DC if you want to but you're being ridiculous if you think the "quality" of DC people is better than anywhere else. Lots of places have interesting people in them. No, not Supreme Court justices - that is unique to DC - but people who work in all these intellectual and creative fields. Many interesting people have left high cost cities, in fact, because it's too hard to keep yourself going in one of the more interesting professions. One reason my smaller city has such a good restaurant scene is that it's affordable enough that chefs can come experiment here. We have a great arts scene for largely the same reason. We have tons of writers here. (I am one of them.)

You keep think this is true, but it’s not. Most of the talent and intellect in this country is located in big cities. Sad, but true.

All of you are so ignorant

Google where the Fortune 500 companies are I'll wait

Here you go

New York NY 42
Houston TX 24
Dallas TX 12
Atlanta GA 10
Minneapolis MN 10
Chicago IL 9
St. Louis MO 8
San Francisco CA 7
Charlotte NC 6
Cincinnati OH 6
Columbus OH 6
Milwaukee WI 6
Englewood CO 5
Irving TX 5
Los Angeles CA 5
Omaha NE 5
Philadelphia PA 5
Pittsburgh PA 5
Richmond VA 5

All of these places are great places to live and in many you can be just as successful for half the cost or more vs DC

It's disturbing to me that anyone that isn't a liberal progressive is somehow less than for many of you.

That's a common knock on democrats in general. Yall need to work on that.

DC is the only place in the country that is so imbalanced politically yall need to get out of your bubbles

Only someone from a flyover city would actually think being a Fortune 500 company means something. It doesn’t. Working for a Fortune 500 company is the dream for someone in Dallas.

LOL, as opposed to what? The "policy analyst" in DC?

No. Perhaps:

Private equity
Hedge fund
Medical doctor
Think tank
Lobbyist
Research scientist
Entertainment industry
Attorney

I could go on...look, a Fortune 500 company is great if you live in Minneapolis. But it’s not where someone living in dc, ny, la etc aspires to work.

[Anonymous]

We're thinking of moving to Richmond for this reason. Anyone done it?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Problem with lower COL areas is that the job market is not as robust. Yes, "everybody" know someone who moved to Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee and found a good position and cheap housing but there is nowhere near the opportunities found in growing areas. Also, lower COL places tend to be insular. You are competing with people who went to local schools, married someone from there, and will never leave there. They pick their own when an opening occurs.

That's ...wrong on just about every level. Dallas and Houston are the same size as DC, with an even better economy, record low unemployment rate and much better COL. I've lived in both and wouldn't describe either as "insular." People are pouring in from other states. And the idea a company like Toyota or AT&T is picking executives based on the neighborhood they grew up in, that's just ludicrous.

SInce when are Dallas and Houston = Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee?

Dallas and Houston have incredible economies but are very hot and 100% sprawl. No charm, history, or walkability.

Yeah right. Dallas has Deep Ellum, Bishop Arts, Lower Greenville, Uptown ...areas with as much walkability as anything you'll find in the District. And several have a funkier vibe than the
manufactured cool of many gentrifying DC neighborhoods. And yeah ...it's hot. But you can also sit outside on the patio in February and don't have to dig out from a blizzard every other year.

You've named areas in Dallas that are much like Atlanta's Five Points/Virginia Highlands -- highly industrialized with a glut of retail/restaurants in one place but they aren't walkable communities with mixed-use density that including housing and amenities artfully imposed together. Basically those are the places you take an Uber to to bar hop for happy hour but you don't live on that street or next to that restaurant nor can you walk to those grocery stores (not unless you want to cross a parking lot which can fit a couple 100 cars easily first). In other words, the Whole Foods is in a shopping plaza.

Huge difference. Basically living there is nothing like D.C.

+1000000. PP obviously has never lived in a real city. Five points in Atlanta is a perfect example. You may be able to walk to bars and restaurants from your house. But on a daily basis walk to work, walk your kids to school and run 90% of your errands on foot? No way. Especially given the hot weather. Dallas is a city built around the automobile. Even in the areas in Dallas claiming to be walkable, the parking lots are HUGE which in itself demonstrates it’s not really a walkable area.

Whereas I live in DC and almost always walk to the grocery store, combo walk and bus to work, and only use my car on the weekend for an errand or going somewhere outside of DC. I can’t imagine many families in Dallas are only using their cars on the weekend.

Meh. You still live in DC, which is full of boring people who are bland AF.

As opposed to whom? Do you live in NY or LA, perhaps?

My DC neighbors work in a variety of pretty interesting professions. I assume you’re thinking everyone’s a fed, but on my block, there are people in medicine, finance, research, education, a museum director, etc. Really runs the gamut.

I live in a small city outside of DC and it's the same as in my neighborhood.

Stay in DC if you want to but you're being ridiculous if you think the "quality" of DC people is better than anywhere else. Lots of places have interesting people in them. No, not Supreme Court justices - that is unique to DC - but people who work in all these intellectual and creative fields. Many interesting people have left high cost cities, in fact, because it's too hard to keep yourself going in one of the more interesting professions. One reason my smaller city has such a good restaurant scene is that it's affordable enough that chefs can come experiment here. We have a great arts scene for largely the same reason. We have tons of writers here. (I am one of them.)

You keep think this is true, but it’s not. Most of the talent and intellect in this country is located in big cities. Sad, but true.

All of you are so ignorant

Google where the Fortune 500 companies are I'll wait

Here you go

New York NY 42
Houston TX 24
Dallas TX 12
Atlanta GA 10
Minneapolis MN 10
Chicago IL 9
St. Louis MO 8
San Francisco CA 7
Charlotte NC 6
Cincinnati OH 6
Columbus OH 6
Milwaukee WI 6
Englewood CO 5
Irving TX 5
Los Angeles CA 5
Omaha NE 5
Philadelphia PA 5
Pittsburgh PA 5
Richmond VA 5

All of these places are great places to live and in many you can be just as successful for half the cost or more vs DC

It's disturbing to me that anyone that isn't a liberal progressive is somehow less than for many of you.

That's a common knock on democrats in general. Yall need to work on that.

DC is the only place in the country that is so imbalanced politically yall need to get out of your bubbles

Only someone from a flyover city would actually think being a Fortune 500 company means something. It doesn’t. Working for a Fortune 500 company is the dream for someone in Dallas.

LOL, as opposed to what? The "policy analyst" in DC?

No. Perhaps:

Private equity
Hedge fund
Medical doctor
Think tank
Lobbyist
Research scientist
Entertainment industry
Attorney

I could go on...look, a Fortune 500 company is great if you live in Minneapolis. But it’s not where someone living in dc, ny, la etc aspires to work.

you really are insufferable you realize you can do most of those jobs in almost any place in the US with say at least 100,000 people. And that was my point people think the only good jobs are in the 5 most expensive metro areas. News Flash they aren't

and to the AA woman. You are an ignorant bigot if you want to be surrounded by people that are exactly like you. So much for diversity..... racist

[Anonymous]

Another thread has degraded into sniping and snark.

[Anonymous]

Has anyone gone from DC to Madison, WI, KC or Louisville?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone gone from DC to Madison, WI, KC or Louisville?

Madison would be a HUGE win.

Negatives are weather and insularity. Lots of people have longstanding friend networks in place.

That said, the university and a few of the big employers bring enough transplants to make it viable.

I'd do it in a heartbeat if circumstances allowed.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Problem with lower COL areas is that the job market is not as robust. Yes, "everybody" know someone who moved to Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee and found a good position and cheap housing but there is nowhere near the opportunities found in growing areas. Also, lower COL places tend to be insular. You are competing with people who went to local schools, married someone from there, and will never leave there. They pick their own when an opening occurs.

That's ...wrong on just about every level. Dallas and Houston are the same size as DC, with an even better economy, record low unemployment rate and much better COL. I've lived in both and wouldn't describe either as "insular." People are pouring in from other states. And the idea a company like Toyota or AT&T is picking executives based on the neighborhood they grew up in, that's just ludicrous.

SInce when are Dallas and Houston = Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee?

Dallas and Houston have incredible economies but are very hot and 100% sprawl. No charm, history, or walkability.

Yeah right. Dallas has Deep Ellum, Bishop Arts, Lower Greenville, Uptown ...areas with as much walkability as anything you'll find in the District. And several have a funkier vibe than the
manufactured cool of many gentrifying DC neighborhoods. And yeah ...it's hot. But you can also sit outside on the patio in February and don't have to dig out from a blizzard every other year.

You've named areas in Dallas that are much like Atlanta's Five Points/Virginia Highlands -- highly industrialized with a glut of retail/restaurants in one place but they aren't walkable communities with mixed-use density that including housing and amenities artfully imposed together. Basically those are the places you take an Uber to to bar hop for happy hour but you don't live on that street or next to that restaurant nor can you walk to those grocery stores (not unless you want to cross a parking lot which can fit a couple 100 cars easily first). In other words, the Whole Foods is in a shopping plaza.

Huge difference. Basically living there is nothing like D.C.

+1000000. PP obviously has never lived in a real city. Five points in Atlanta is a perfect example. You may be able to walk to bars and restaurants from your house. But on a daily basis walk to work, walk your kids to school and run 90% of your errands on foot? No way. Especially given the hot weather. Dallas is a city built around the automobile. Even in the areas in Dallas claiming to be walkable, the parking lots are HUGE which in itself demonstrates it’s not really a walkable area.

Whereas I live in DC and almost always walk to the grocery store, combo walk and bus to work, and only use my car on the weekend for an errand or going somewhere outside of DC. I can’t imagine many families in Dallas are only using their cars on the weekend.

I'm shocked at how blind posters like you are. How many people in DC actually live like this? Not that many 5-10% of the metro population, maybe? The vast majority of people live a suburban car oriented lifestyle or even if they take the subway to work it's long commutes still.

You talk about what works for you in your very specific urban context while totally ignoring that most people in DC can't live the way you do. And you pay a price for your lifestyle that is not affordable to many if not most people. Your ignorance is amazing, because your knowledge of DC stops at the borders of your neighborhood and you're using your very narrow context as a basis for comparison with other cities while ignoring the rest of the DC metro area where most people actually live.

12 percent of DC residents walk to work
38 percent of households don’t have cars
37 percent of residents take public transportation - I fall in this category and it’s far from the 5-10 percent you claimed.


MORE DC residents than NYers walk to work. NY is at 10 percent walking to work

How old are some of you?

Those are quotes for DC specific. We are talking about metro areas. You'd probably find comparable statistics if comparing strictly the urban core / downtown of many metro areas. 12% of DC metro area does not walk to work. It'd be impossible.

Right. This a DC URBAN website and the title of the post is about moving from DC. Not moving from ashburn.

The website name is DC Urban Moms and Dads. Are you a mom or a dad too? Somehow I have a feeling you're not. Because you're probably a kid.

I have news for you. Ashburn is part of DC. Just as much as Logan Circle is. Ashburn as we know it wouldn't exist if it weren't for DC. It's a suburb of Washington, DC. It's totally fair to consider it part of DC when talking about moving from one metro area to another.

Omg. No, it’s not. It’s not legally part of Washington, dc. Saying you live in dc when you live in ashburn is LYING

The more you talk the more you clearly reveal you're a kid. "OMG" and "LYING". Really? Wow. I'm impressed.

Ashburn is part of metropolitan DC. It is firmly part of the "DC" area and perfectly justifiable to refer to if talking about moving from DC to a lower cost area even if it is Ashburn to a lower cost suburb of another city.

Yes, Ashburn is part of the DC metro.

No, Ashburn is not part of DC. The residents don’t live in DC, don’t pay DC taxes, can’t attend DC public schools, and can’t vote in DC elections.

And this entire thread is about leaving DC metro area for a lower cost area. This includes leaving Ashburn which is part of the DC metro area. The thread is not about leaving urban DC within the district for a cheaper suburb. This thread is not and has never been about the DC that only exists within the geographical (and artificial) borders of Washington, DC. Or the OP would have made it abundantly clear.

Like it or not, when people talk about living or moving from one area to another, the entire metro area is within consideration. That is normal convention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Has anyone gone from DC to Madison, WI, KC or Louisville?

KC and Louisville are great

Madison is a bit smaller but still doable, Winters suck pretty hard though

[Anonymous]

RTP in North Carolina is today what I think Chantilly was twenty years ago; a rapidly developing dynamic economy. There are super-educated people there and costs are still low enough to permit a lot of small business (tech oriented) activity that is getting harder to do in DC metro.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have you done it?

We are strongly considering it over the course of the next five years. We have to make it work with careers, of course, but if we can, we'd like to head back to upstate NY to be closer to family and to be in a lower COL area.

We didn't get on the property ladder when we should have and now are still renting while paying for childcare, saving for college, and saving for retirement. We simply cannot afford a home in the city that would guarantee good school options through high school. We hate the thought of long commutes and what that will mean for spending time with our kids. DC is increasingly expensive and we think we can have a better quality of life elsewhere. BUT I am sure I am romanticizing, and there are likely plenty of factors I am not considering. So, have you done it? Have you left for a lower COL area, and if so, what have been the pros and cons?

Looks like OP was referring to DC specifically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Perhaps upstate NY truly is cheaper, but be careful about assuming YOUR costs will be cheaper. I come from a western state that ostensibly is cheaper, but when I look at houses (neighborhoods) I would want to live in, the home cost is the same as here. Restaurants (decent, nothing fancy) are more expensive. Property taxes are less. Etc. We will probably retire out there, but not counting on it being cheaper.

Rochester truly is cheaper. You can get a gorgeous old home from the 1920s, if that is your thing, for under 500k or a brand new McMansion, if that is your thing, for under 750k.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's interesting hearing someone with a HHI of $300k worry that they won't have the opportunity to advance in their career, if they leave DC.

It makes me wonder if some of this debate really comes to - are you a type A person who wants to achieve and earn and keep pushing, or are you a type B who wants a more laid back lifestyle. Type A, sure - staying in DC could seem very important. Type B - leaving and having more free time and a nice house but less chance of hitting it HUGE one day seems plenty good.

eh I don't know if this is true. My husband is a type A (I am definitely type B) but he took an executive job for a company in Rochester. We have a great QoL here. It definitely would not be an exciting place to live for single people in their 20s but for late 30s/40s raising kids, it's pretty great. We bought our house in cash, no mortgage, "rush hour" traffic is a joke, and we travel all the time. We'll definitely be able to pay for our kids' entire educations, no problem. Late spring, summer, and falls are beautiful. We go hiking all the time in the various NY state parks.

Winter is cold and snowy but we've gotten used to it and I honestly really like the snow now. It helps that we've taken up skiing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's interesting hearing someone with a HHI of $300k worry that they won't have the opportunity to advance in their career, if they leave DC.

It makes me wonder if some of this debate really comes to - are you a type A person who wants to achieve and earn and keep pushing, or are you a type B who wants a more laid back lifestyle. Type A, sure - staying in DC could seem very important. Type B - leaving and having more free time and a nice house but less chance of hitting it HUGE one day seems plenty good.

eh I don't know if this is true. My husband is a type A (I am definitely type B) but he took an executive job for a company in Rochester. We have a great QoL here. It definitely would not be an exciting place to live for single people in their 20s but for late 30s/40s raising kids, it's pretty great. We bought our house in cash, no mortgage, "rush hour" traffic is a joke, and we travel all the time. We'll definitely be able to pay for our kids' entire educations, no problem. Late spring, summer, and falls are beautiful. We go hiking all the time in the various NY state parks.

Winter is cold and snowy but we've gotten used to it and I honestly really like the snow now. It helps that we've taken up skiing.

Me again. We left NYC to come here, not DC.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Problem with lower COL areas is that the job market is not as robust. Yes, "everybody" know someone who moved to Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee and found a good position and cheap housing but there is nowhere near the opportunities found in growing areas. Also, lower COL places tend to be insular. You are competing with people who went to local schools, married someone from there, and will never leave there. They pick their own when an opening occurs.

That's ...wrong on just about every level. Dallas and Houston are the same size as DC, with an even better economy, record low unemployment rate and much better COL. I've lived in both and wouldn't describe either as "insular." People are pouring in from other states. And the idea a company like Toyota or AT&T is picking executives based on the neighborhood they grew up in, that's just ludicrous.

SInce when are Dallas and Houston = Cleveland/Detroit/Milwaukee?

Dallas and Houston have incredible economies but are very hot and 100% sprawl. No charm, history, or walkability.

Yeah right. Dallas has Deep Ellum, Bishop Arts, Lower Greenville, Uptown ...areas with as much walkability as anything you'll find in the District. And several have a funkier vibe than the
manufactured cool of many gentrifying DC neighborhoods. And yeah ...it's hot. But you can also sit outside on the patio in February and don't have to dig out from a blizzard every other year.

You've named areas in Dallas that are much like Atlanta's Five Points/Virginia Highlands -- highly industrialized with a glut of retail/restaurants in one place but they aren't walkable communities with mixed-use density that including housing and amenities artfully imposed together. Basically those are the places you take an Uber to to bar hop for happy hour but you don't live on that street or next to that restaurant nor can you walk to those grocery stores (not unless you want to cross a parking lot which can fit a couple 100 cars easily first). In other words, the Whole Foods is in a shopping plaza.

Huge difference. Basically living there is nothing like D.C.

+1000000. PP obviously has never lived in a real city. Five points in Atlanta is a perfect example. You may be able to walk to bars and restaurants from your house. But on a daily basis walk to work, walk your kids to school and run 90% of your errands on foot? No way. Especially given the hot weather. Dallas is a city built around the automobile. Even in the areas in Dallas claiming to be walkable, the parking lots are HUGE which in itself demonstrates it’s not really a walkable area.

Whereas I live in DC and almost always walk to the grocery store, combo walk and bus to work, and only use my car on the weekend for an errand or going somewhere outside of DC. I can’t imagine many families in Dallas are only using their cars on the weekend.

Meh. You still live in DC, which is full of boring people who are bland AF.

As opposed to whom? Do you live in NY or LA, perhaps?

My DC neighbors work in a variety of pretty interesting professions. I assume you’re thinking everyone’s a fed, but on my block, there are people in medicine, finance, research, education, a museum director, etc. Really runs the gamut.

I live in a small city outside of DC and it's the same as in my neighborhood.

Stay in DC if you want to but you're being ridiculous if you think the "quality" of DC people is better than anywhere else. Lots of places have interesting people in them. No, not Supreme Court justices - that is unique to DC - but people who work in all these intellectual and creative fields. Many interesting people have left high cost cities, in fact, because it's too hard to keep yourself going in one of the more interesting professions. One reason my smaller city has such a good restaurant scene is that it's affordable enough that chefs can come experiment here. We have a great arts scene for largely the same reason. We have tons of writers here. (I am one of them.)

You keep think this is true, but it’s not. Most of the talent and intellect in this country is located in big cities. Sad, but true.

All of you are so ignorant

Google where the Fortune 500 companies are I'll wait

Here you go

New York NY 42
Houston TX 24
Dallas TX 12
Atlanta GA 10
Minneapolis MN 10
Chicago IL 9
St. Louis MO 8
San Francisco CA 7
Charlotte NC 6
Cincinnati OH 6
Columbus OH 6
Milwaukee WI 6
Englewood CO 5
Irving TX 5
Los Angeles CA 5
Omaha NE 5
Philadelphia PA 5
Pittsburgh PA 5
Richmond VA 5

All of these places are great places to live and in many you can be just as successful for half the cost or more vs DC

It's disturbing to me that anyone that isn't a liberal progressive is somehow less than for many of you.

That's a common knock on democrats in general. Yall need to work on that.

DC is the only place in the country that is so imbalanced politically yall need to get out of your bubbles

Only someone from a flyover city would actually think being a Fortune 500 company means something. It doesn’t. Working for a Fortune 500 company is the dream for someone in Dallas.

LOL, as opposed to what? The "policy analyst" in DC?

No. Perhaps:

Private equity
Hedge fund
Medical doctor
Think tank
Lobbyist
Research scientist
Entertainment industry
Attorney

I could go on...look, a Fortune 500 company is great if you live in Minneapolis. But it’s not where someone living in dc, ny, la etc aspires to work.

you really are insufferable you realize you can do most of those jobs in almost any place in the US with say at least 100,000 people. And that was my point people think the only good jobs are in the 5 most expensive metro areas. News Flash they aren't

and to the AA woman. You are an ignorant bigot if you want to be surrounded by people that are exactly like you. So much for diversity..... racist

Not the PP, but please stop, you're embarrassing yourself. Surely the burgeoning lobbyist and hedge fund class of Peoria (population 115k!) beg to differ!

A few easy examples:
- With basically one exception (Mayo Clinic), every top hospital in the U.S. is in or adjacent to a major city.
- The vast majority of top research universities are now in major cities (and indeed, they always would have been had it not been for the land grant acts). This is in large part because urban universities have a dramatically easier time attracting top talent.
- Growth industries and the industries that feed into them (e.g. venture capital) are extraordinarily concentrated. See e.g. https://www.bloomberg.com/graphics/2018-venture-capital-deals/

Ask basically anyone in any of these industries, and they will tell you that not only are these things true, but they are getting more true over time. Are there lots of ways to make a living and live a middle class lifestyle in smaller cities in the U.S.? Sure. But it's no secret that the top of the food chain is exceedingly concentrated, and only getting more so over time.