We spend around 18K a month, where does it go?

[Anonymous]

OP’s budget sounds pretty realistic for most UMC families. I don’t get why so many people are calling troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What you spend in one month is what I net in 6 months. $1K per month on eating out? Either you are going to very expensive restaurants or eating out/take out with the kids half of the month or more.

We easily spend that much per month eating out. There are 90 meals a month per person! It’s not hard at all.

So do we

We are average earners, spend too much on take-out, too tired to cook...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Twice weekly housekeeper?

How's this dramatic? We have someone who comes 5hrs a day 5 days a week. She runs errands, grocery shops, cleans (we have weekly deep cleaners), meal preps, and organizes. I spends exactly zero time doing things I don't like doing. Well worth thr money.

Omg please how did you find her and how much do you pay.We are dying for something like this.

We pay a flat $500/wk-52 weeks a year, but also pay her and our side of FICA.

She's not working this week because we are on vacation, but she is doing a grocery shopping tomorrow and picking up our Easter catering so we come home to a full fridge of food.

We take 4-5 such weeks off a year.

I found her from a neighbor. She was their amazing nanny who was a household manager practically and the kids grew out of needing a nanny. She splits her time between us and another family. We have her from 12-5 M-F

It's incredible. I don't grocery shop, my fruits and veggies and cleaned and chopped and stored, i don't do laundry and, my closets are organized, my home is clutter free, and she now knows exactly what I need for meal prep. I post a weekly menu and she does all the chopping a cleaning, marinating and measuring. I just assemble stuff.

She also picks us prescriptions, gets oil changes, runs to thr post office, and will take the pets to the groomer.

Even Eddie Murphy goes to dry cleaners and run errands, he once said if I outsource everything what the f@ck do I do all day and I don’t want cold Starbucks. I like errands. I don’t consider them work.

Yes, I wonder if you outsource literally everything, what exactly are you doing with your time? Not like scrubbing toilets or folding laundry is fun but I consider some of these activities to be the business of living, so to speak. They give me a chance to think or move around or I play music or talk to DH while I do them.

I can think plenty in the absence of scrubbing toilets and folding laundry. Both DH and I work FT and don't find cleaning and shopping enhances our family time. I'm glad this brings you pleasure though. Maybe if your looking for work you can give my toilets a swirl.

I also won't take advice on running a household from a man who has 5 different baby mammas.

We all work full time. Chores aren’t pleasurable, but doing things for yourself and being competent at running your household should give you a sense of pride or contentment. My parents worked full time and I wasn’t raised to think of household chores as this horrible bane of my existence ruining my life even though my mother was a physician and could have outsourced whatever she wanted to. But she didn’t because she was organized and not accumulating junk constantly and chores did not make her miserable.

Why "should" this give me a sense of pride and contentment? Your virtue signal is strong. I don't find this virtuous. It's tedious and a waste of my time. Of course I can do all this stuff. It's not rocket science. I can also change the oil in my car. I won't ever do that. It does not spark joy or contentment as you say. I mush prefer spending time with my family, reading a book, or simply watching a movie on a random Wednesday night.

Virtue signaling? Ok, you do you. Very few people can afford to outsource everything, and honestly, taking care of your home is not that hard if you have a decent routine. It honestly seems so wasteful. But keep dreaming of the day you can just lay about and do nothing all day. It sounds like you’re having a blast.

I'm confused now, you're changing it up. Will cleaning toilets and doing laundry bring me pride and contentment instead of hanging with my family? Or is it now wasteful to have someone else do that? What exactly am I wasting and which virtue is more noble?

What are you talking about? No one is “virtue signaling,” I don’t even think you are using that phrase correctly. You just seem aggressive for no reaso. I have family abroad who have hired help for every minute detail of their lives, and it’s really not something I would want. My parents grew up with that too- and they did not want it in the US.

If you want to be miserable living your life like a normal person, go right ahead. Rest assured that OP and “I don’t wash my vegetables” lady are not happy, content people. Would you really create a post like this if you were a happy person? Would you really brag about something like that if you were genuinely happy about it? It’s like my husband says about the couples who post too much lovey-dovey stuff on Facebook- something is not right there.

I'm not the OP keep up.

You seem very emotionally involved in my housekeeper. It's kind of odd, but people like you are why I keep coming back to this site. I'm hoping you are just drunk.

I’ve been alive long enough to know that no one happy would write something like this. This is just a bitter, mean person hoping to get some satisfaction out of one-upping someone anonymously on the internet.

Everyone sees you, lady.

Just a poor here chiming in. I don't know...seems this poster who is attacking someone who has a housekeeper is the one unhappy. She honestly comes across jealous.

I find it fascinating that someone can afford this. If I won the lottery tomorrow I'd hire a housekeeper like this. It would be Devine to throw my limited free time into my kids, spouse, friends and....gasp...have time for self care. I glean no happiness from chores. It's exhausting to work full time and run a household. It's a grind.

NP +1. Yep she’s insanely jealous. I also got that uncomfortable feeling (envy) reading about PP’s housekeeper and started justifying it with the whole “she’s a braggy, mean person who’s probably unhappy deep down” until I checked myself and realized that’s just my jealousy talking. Comparing PP to a FB poster is stupid too. She’s posting anonymously- the insecure social media bragger lives to get their name and face out there.

I would also love to have a housekeeper, and especially for a couple of days so they’re not always in your home.

Um OP and the other poster are trolls. If you can’t figure that out don’t bother using this website.

Not sure why you’re so angry.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We’re about the same. I don’t keep track but we charge most things and my credit card bills are routinely 25k. But otoh, we bring in over 55k after taxes and basic savings.

Lol you’re not “about the same” if you’re spending 6k more every month! That is a lot of people’s monthly paycheck.

Is this Monopoly money to you?!

[Anonymous]

I think you keep yourself busy by eating out, grocery shopping, commuting, and buying clothes. You are waiting for the kids to grow up since they are handful and instead of playing with your kids, you eat out to entertain them and buy stuff that hopefully keeps them busy for a minute.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, what is yourHHI?

A bajillion dollars per year. Because OP is the most obvious troll.

I hope not.Bragging about paying your "amazing" employee less than $20 an hour and saying you think she is underpaid is not that cool but is really not that cool if you are that wealthy.

I don’t know; being stingy with an employee was sort of the only realistic thing she said.

The housekeeper poster doesn't seem stingy to me.

Paid 52 weeks a year for 48 weeks of work
Both sides of FICA paid
A gifted car
A flight back to home country each year
Large medical deductible paid
Christmas bonus
Use of pool for family

Sounds like incredible benefits and it's no wonder she's had siid housekeeper for years.

That housekeeper is making wayyy more money that the people that clean up after you when you stay at hotels. Where your outrage for them?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re about the same. I don’t keep track but we charge most things and my credit card bills are routinely 25k. But otoh, we bring in over 55k after taxes and basic savings.

Lol you’re not “about the same” if you’re spending 6k more every month! That is a lot of people’s monthly paycheck.

Is this Monopoly money to you?!

If I netted 55k/mo, 25k in fixed and disposable expenses is NOTHING.

You all are so pitifully envious of people who have more material success. It's great entertainment to watch you squirm.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Twice weekly housekeeper?

How's this dramatic? We have someone who comes 5hrs a day 5 days a week. She runs errands, grocery shops, cleans (we have weekly deep cleaners), meal preps, and organizes. I spends exactly zero time doing things I don't like doing. Well worth thr money.

Omg please how did you find her and how much do you pay.We are dying for something like this.

We pay a flat $500/wk-52 weeks a year, but also pay her and our side of FICA.

She's not working this week because we are on vacation, but she is doing a grocery shopping tomorrow and picking up our Easter catering so we come home to a full fridge of food.

We take 4-5 such weeks off a year.

I found her from a neighbor. She was their amazing nanny who was a household manager practically and the kids grew out of needing a nanny. She splits her time between us and another family. We have her from 12-5 M-F

It's incredible. I don't grocery shop, my fruits and veggies and cleaned and chopped and stored, i don't do laundry and, my closets are organized, my home is clutter free, and she now knows exactly what I need for meal prep. I post a weekly menu and she does all the chopping a cleaning, marinating and measuring. I just assemble stuff.

She also picks us prescriptions, gets oil changes, runs to thr post office, and will take the pets to the groomer.

Even Eddie Murphy goes to dry cleaners and run errands, he once said if I outsource everything what the f@ck do I do all day and I don’t want cold Starbucks. I like errands. I don’t consider them work.

Yes, I wonder if you outsource literally everything, what exactly are you doing with your time? Not like scrubbing toilets or folding laundry is fun but I consider some of these activities to be the business of living, so to speak. They give me a chance to think or move around or I play music or talk to DH while I do them.

I can think plenty in the absence of scrubbing toilets and folding laundry. Both DH and I work FT and don't find cleaning and shopping enhances our family time. I'm glad this brings you pleasure though. Maybe if your looking for work you can give my toilets a swirl.

I also won't take advice on running a household from a man who has 5 different baby mammas.

We all work full time. Chores aren’t pleasurable, but doing things for yourself and being competent at running your household should give you a sense of pride or contentment. My parents worked full time and I wasn’t raised to think of household chores as this horrible bane of my existence ruining my life even though my mother was a physician and could have outsourced whatever she wanted to. But she didn’t because she was organized and not accumulating junk constantly and chores did not make her miserable.

Why "should" this give me a sense of pride and contentment? Your virtue signal is strong. I don't find this virtuous. It's tedious and a waste of my time. Of course I can do all this stuff. It's not rocket science. I can also change the oil in my car. I won't ever do that. It does not spark joy or contentment as you say. I mush prefer spending time with my family, reading a book, or simply watching a movie on a random Wednesday night.

Virtue signaling? Ok, you do you. Very few people can afford to outsource everything, and honestly, taking care of your home is not that hard if you have a decent routine. It honestly seems so wasteful. But keep dreaming of the day you can just lay about and do nothing all day. It sounds like you’re having a blast.

I'm confused now, you're changing it up. Will cleaning toilets and doing laundry bring me pride and contentment instead of hanging with my family? Or is it now wasteful to have someone else do that? What exactly am I wasting and which virtue is more noble?

What are you talking about? No one is “virtue signaling,” I don’t even think you are using that phrase correctly. You just seem aggressive for no reaso. I have family abroad who have hired help for every minute detail of their lives, and it’s really not something I would want. My parents grew up with that too- and they did not want it in the US.

If you want to be miserable living your life like a normal person, go right ahead. Rest assured that OP and “I don’t wash my vegetables” lady are not happy, content people. Would you really create a post like this if you were a happy person? Would you really brag about something like that if you were genuinely happy about it? It’s like my husband says about the couples who post too much lovey-dovey stuff on Facebook- something is not right there.

I'm not the OP keep up.

You seem very emotionally involved in my housekeeper. It's kind of odd, but people like you are why I keep coming back to this site. I'm hoping you are just drunk.

I’ve been alive long enough to know that no one happy would write something like this. This is just a bitter, mean person hoping to get some satisfaction out of one-upping someone anonymously on the internet.

Everyone sees you, lady.

Just a poor here chiming in. I don't know...seems this poster who is attacking someone who has a housekeeper is the one unhappy. She honestly comes across jealous.

I find it fascinating that someone can afford this. If I won the lottery tomorrow I'd hire a housekeeper like this. It would be Devine to throw my limited free time into my kids, spouse, friends and....gasp...have time for self care. I glean no happiness from chores. It's exhausting to work full time and run a household. It's a grind.

NP +1. Yep she’s insanely jealous. I also got that uncomfortable feeling (envy) reading about PP’s housekeeper and started justifying it with the whole “she’s a braggy, mean person who’s probably unhappy deep down” until I checked myself and realized that’s just my jealousy talking. Comparing PP to a FB poster is stupid too. She’s posting anonymously- the insecure social media bragger lives to get their name and face out there.

I would also love to have a housekeeper, and especially for a couple of days so they’re not always in your home.

Um OP and the other poster are trolls. If you can’t figure that out don’t bother using this website.

Not sure why you’re so angry.

I'll tell you why. Envy is the thief of joy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You don't need to be spending $2,500/mo on home goods and adult clothing. That is insane.

Why is your phone/cable bill so high? Research the company websites for a better deal. They will give you one because they don't want to lose your business to a competitor.

Peloton is a big waste of money, IMHO. Ditch it.

Learn to clip virtual coupons and stick to a grocery list.

Set an entertainment budget. You spend no more than $150/month. No, really. It will make you figure out what is worth your dollars. The kids can learn delayed gratification. Bonus.

I can keep going, but I have a feeling that OP won't change a thing. Just a hunch.

See, the cool thing about having a high income like OP (and me) is you don't have to do time-consuming, low return stuff like clip coupons, have a 150/mo entertainment budget, or constantly haggle with service providers to save a few bucks a month on cable. Time is more valuable than that, especially when there's so much obvious fluff in the budget if OP really wants to cut back. Instead of wasting time on coupons, you get to come be snarky on DCUM.

IDK. It seems very odd. What itch is this thread scratching?

Sometimes people are puzzled because in America you are supposed to be happy if you are rich and can buy anything you want. And you keep spending more and more -- this lady admits, she just buys whatever she wants, but someone does not seem happy. And what she is actually trying to do is figure out why she still doesn't seem content, why something still seems off about her life.

But she is asking the wrong question. This is the question she should be asking is: Here is how I spend my time every month--are there places I am spending too much, and places I am spending too little? Are there things I should be doing that would bring me more happiness and satisfaction? And that is probably just a question she needs to ask herself. Framing it in terms of money isn't going to get her there, although several people have pointed out that having few restrictions on your spending means you also run the danger of having fewer constraints on the time you can spend (or waste) shopping, plus you can even become addicted to the dopamine hit of buying things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re about the same. I don’t keep track but we charge most things and my credit card bills are routinely 25k. But otoh, we bring in over 55k after taxes and basic savings.

Lol you’re not “about the same” if you’re spending 6k more every month! That is a lot of people’s monthly paycheck.

Is this Monopoly money to you?!

If I netted 55k/mo, 25k in fixed and disposable expenses is NOTHING.

You all are so pitifully envious of people who have more material success. It's great entertainment to watch you squirm.

No one is ever envious of an asshole, no matter how rich they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re about the same. I don’t keep track but we charge most things and my credit card bills are routinely 25k. But otoh, we bring in over 55k after taxes and basic savings.

Lol you’re not “about the same” if you’re spending 6k more every month! That is a lot of people’s monthly paycheck.

Is this Monopoly money to you?!

If I netted 55k/mo, 25k in fixed and disposable expenses is NOTHING.

You all are so pitifully envious of people who have more material success. It's great entertainment to watch you squirm.

This poster is probably OP, stirring the pot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Twice weekly housekeeper?

How's this dramatic? We have someone who comes 5hrs a day 5 days a week. She runs errands, grocery shops, cleans (we have weekly deep cleaners), meal preps, and organizes. I spends exactly zero time doing things I don't like doing. Well worth thr money.

Omg please how did you find her and how much do you pay.We are dying for something like this.

We pay a flat $500/wk-52 weeks a year, but also pay her and our side of FICA.

She's not working this week because we are on vacation, but she is doing a grocery shopping tomorrow and picking up our Easter catering so we come home to a full fridge of food.

We take 4-5 such weeks off a year.

I found her from a neighbor. She was their amazing nanny who was a household manager practically and the kids grew out of needing a nanny. She splits her time between us and another family. We have her from 12-5 M-F

It's incredible. I don't grocery shop, my fruits and veggies and cleaned and chopped and stored, i don't do laundry and, my closets are organized, my home is clutter free, and she now knows exactly what I need for meal prep. I post a weekly menu and she does all the chopping a cleaning, marinating and measuring. I just assemble stuff.

She also picks us prescriptions, gets oil changes, runs to thr post office, and will take the pets to the groomer.

Even Eddie Murphy goes to dry cleaners and run errands, he once said if I outsource everything what the f@ck do I do all day and I don’t want cold Starbucks. I like errands. I don’t consider them work.

Yes, I wonder if you outsource literally everything, what exactly are you doing with your time? Not like scrubbing toilets or folding laundry is fun but I consider some of these activities to be the business of living, so to speak. They give me a chance to think or move around or I play music or talk to DH while I do them.

I can think plenty in the absence of scrubbing toilets and folding laundry. Both DH and I work FT and don't find cleaning and shopping enhances our family time. I'm glad this brings you pleasure though. Maybe if your looking for work you can give my toilets a swirl.

I also won't take advice on running a household from a man who has 5 different baby mammas.

We all work full time. Chores aren’t pleasurable, but doing things for yourself and being competent at running your household should give you a sense of pride or contentment. My parents worked full time and I wasn’t raised to think of household chores as this horrible bane of my existence ruining my life even though my mother was a physician and could have outsourced whatever she wanted to. But she didn’t because she was organized and not accumulating junk constantly and chores did not make her miserable.

Why "should" this give me a sense of pride and contentment? Your virtue signal is strong. I don't find this virtuous. It's tedious and a waste of my time. Of course I can do all this stuff. It's not rocket science. I can also change the oil in my car. I won't ever do that. It does not spark joy or contentment as you say. I mush prefer spending time with my family, reading a book, or simply watching a movie on a random Wednesday night.

Virtue signaling? Ok, you do you. Very few people can afford to outsource everything, and honestly, taking care of your home is not that hard if you have a decent routine. It honestly seems so wasteful. But keep dreaming of the day you can just lay about and do nothing all day. It sounds like you’re having a blast.

I'm confused now, you're changing it up. Will cleaning toilets and doing laundry bring me pride and contentment instead of hanging with my family? Or is it now wasteful to have someone else do that? What exactly am I wasting and which virtue is more noble?

What are you talking about? No one is “virtue signaling,” I don’t even think you are using that phrase correctly. You just seem aggressive for no reaso. I have family abroad who have hired help for every minute detail of their lives, and it’s really not something I would want. My parents grew up with that too- and they did not want it in the US.

If you want to be miserable living your life like a normal person, go right ahead. Rest assured that OP and “I don’t wash my vegetables” lady are not happy, content people. Would you really create a post like this if you were a happy person? Would you really brag about something like that if you were genuinely happy about it? It’s like my husband says about the couples who post too much lovey-dovey stuff on Facebook- something is not right there.

I'm not the OP keep up.

You seem very emotionally involved in my housekeeper. It's kind of odd, but people like you are why I keep coming back to this site. I'm hoping you are just drunk.

I’ve been alive long enough to know that no one happy would write something like this. This is just a bitter, mean person hoping to get some satisfaction out of one-upping someone anonymously on the internet.

Everyone sees you, lady.

Just a poor here chiming in. I don't know...seems this poster who is attacking someone who has a housekeeper is the one unhappy. She honestly comes across jealous.

I find it fascinating that someone can afford this. If I won the lottery tomorrow I'd hire a housekeeper like this. It would be Devine to throw my limited free time into my kids, spouse, friends and....gasp...have time for self care. I glean no happiness from chores. It's exhausting to work full time and run a household. It's a grind.

NP +1. Yep she’s insanely jealous. I also got that uncomfortable feeling (envy) reading about PP’s housekeeper and started justifying it with the whole “she’s a braggy, mean person who’s probably unhappy deep down” until I checked myself and realized that’s just my jealousy talking. Comparing PP to a FB poster is stupid too. She’s posting anonymously- the insecure social media bragger lives to get their name and face out there.

I would also love to have a housekeeper, and especially for a couple of days so they’re not always in your home.

Um OP and the other poster are trolls. If you can’t figure that out don’t bother using this website.

Not sure why you’re so angry.

Fukc the dcUM wives with their Hermés scarves and their fifty-dollar Balducci artichokes. Overfed faces getting pulled and lifted and stretched, all taut and shiny. You’re not fooling anybody, sweetheart

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re about the same. I don’t keep track but we charge most things and my credit card bills are routinely 25k. But otoh, we bring in over 55k after taxes and basic savings.

Lol you’re not “about the same” if you’re spending 6k more every month! That is a lot of people’s monthly paycheck.

Is this Monopoly money to you?!

If I netted 55k/mo, 25k in fixed and disposable expenses is NOTHING.

You all are so pitifully envious of people who have more material success. It's great entertainment to watch you squirm.

No one is ever envious of an asshole, no matter how rich they are.

Seems like a lot of jealous people on this thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP’s budget sounds pretty realistic for most UMC families. I don’t get why so many people are calling troll.

I don't get it either. I'm one of the PP's who posted their budget, I found it helpful to see where people spend more/less. It seems to me OP wants to spend more intentionally, that's a good thing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We’re about the same. I don’t keep track but we charge most things and my credit card bills are routinely 25k. But otoh, we bring in over 55k after taxes and basic savings.

Lol you’re not “about the same” if you’re spending 6k more every month! That is a lot of people’s monthly paycheck.

Is this Monopoly money to you?!

If I netted 55k/mo, 25k in fixed and disposable expenses is NOTHING.

You all are so pitifully envious of people who have more material success. It's great entertainment to watch you squirm.

No one is ever envious of an asshole, no matter how rich they are.

Seems like a lot of jealous people on this thread.

There was no actual purpose or question in OP’s post. It was just a poorly veiled effort to get a bunch of bored middle class people to argue about theoretical sums of money because most of these posters are just as shallow and vacuous as the imaginary OP.