Is it possible to cheat and not get caught?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whether you want to admit it or not, being a dishonest person slowly chips away at your inner core. There'll be a divide between who you say you are and the person you actually are.

This. Read this. Assuming you are not a sociopath, this will not do good things for your sense of self

NP. This is not true. People tend to be broken up and sorry to begin with, but then they realize the world isn't ending, and it's no big deal in the large scheme of things. In other words, it works the other way around for non-sociopaths.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whether you want to admit it or not, being a dishonest person slowly chips away at your inner core. There'll be a divide between who you say you are and the person you actually are.

This. Read this. Assuming you are not a sociopath, this will not do good things for your sense of self

NP. This is not true. People tend to be broken up and sorry to begin with, but then they realize the world isn't ending, and it's no big deal in the large scheme of things. In other words, it works the other way around for non-sociopaths.

No big deal until you are caught and your kids see you as a cheater for the rest of their lives. Hope she was worth it...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whether you want to admit it or not, being a dishonest person slowly chips away at your inner core. There'll be a divide between who you say you are and the person you actually are.

This. Read this. Assuming you are not a sociopath, this will not do good things for your sense of self

NP. This is not true. People tend to be broken up and sorry to begin with, but then they realize the world isn't ending, and it's no big deal in the large scheme of things. In other words, it works the other way around for non-sociopaths.

No big deal until you are caught and your kids see you as a cheater for the rest of their lives. Hope she was worth it...

That pp is not well. Very sad.

[Anonymous]

Just because you don’t get “caught” doesn’t mean your SO doesn’t know you’re cheating.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whether you want to admit it or not, being a dishonest person slowly chips away at your inner core. There'll be a divide between who you say you are and the person you actually are.

This. Read this. Assuming you are not a sociopath, this will not do good things for your sense of self

NP. This is not true. People tend to be broken up and sorry to begin with, but then they realize the world isn't ending, and it's no big deal in the large scheme of things. In other words, it works the other way around for non-sociopaths.

No big deal until you are caught and your kids see you as a cheater for the rest of their lives. Hope she was worth it...

My daughter was mad at me for a while, that's true. It has affected our relationship. She is hurt, angry, upset, appalled, offended, grossed out. All that. And she probably still feels those things. But she still loves me. And she still picks me over my spouse about 75% of the time (down from 90% of the time pre-affair). And of course I wish she didn't know, of course. But she and we are working through it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whether you want to admit it or not, being a dishonest person slowly chips away at your inner core. There'll be a divide between who you say you are and the person you actually are.

This. Read this. Assuming you are not a sociopath, this will not do good things for your sense of self

NP. This is not true. People tend to be broken up and sorry to begin with, but then they realize the world isn't ending, and it's no big deal in the large scheme of things. In other words, it works the other way around for non-sociopaths.

No big deal until you are caught and your kids see you as a cheater for the rest of their lives. Hope she was worth it...

My daughter was mad at me for a while, that's true. It has affected our relationship. She is hurt, angry, upset, appalled, offended, grossed out. All that. And she probably still feels those things. But she still loves me. And she still picks me over my spouse about 75% of the time (down from 90% of the time pre-affair). And of course I wish she didn't know, of course. But she and we are working through it all.

You're quite the mom.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whether you want to admit it or not, being a dishonest person slowly chips away at your inner core. There'll be a divide between who you say you are and the person you actually are.

This. Read this. Assuming you are not a sociopath, this will not do good things for your sense of self

NP. This is not true. People tend to be broken up and sorry to begin with, but then they realize the world isn't ending, and it's no big deal in the large scheme of things. In other words, it works the other way around for non-sociopaths.

No big deal until you are caught and your kids see you as a cheater for the rest of their lives. Hope she was worth it...

My daughter was mad at me for a while, that's true. It has affected our relationship. She is hurt, angry, upset, appalled, offended, grossed out. All that. And she probably still feels those things. But she still loves me. And she still picks me over my spouse about 75% of the time (down from 90% of the time pre-affair). And of course I wish she didn't know, of course. But she and we are working through it all.

You're quite the mom.

or dad

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just because you don’t get “caught” doesn’t mean your SO doesn’t know you’re cheating.

Truth

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wondering if in today's day and age, it is possible to cheat without getting caught.

Yes, it's possible to cheat and not get caught.

However, it's not possible to cheat and KNOW you won't get caught.

It's also not likely that you won't get caught.

If you like living with a sword of Damocles over your head, and you're comfortable blowing up your marriage and any material, emotional and child related aspects without any notice, then have at it.

On the other hand, if you are truly concerned for your kids, then grow the F up and model a mature way of dealing with your problems.

Cheaters always think that they can cheat and no one else will know, but I guarantee that the cheating changes you in ways that are hard for your kids to understand, and I don't mean that in a good way.

Do a little reading about Adult Children of Alcoholics and you will see what I mean about the impact of secrets in a family system.

Also, if you cheat, be prepared at any moment to lose your relationship with your kids forever.

It's a big gamble you are thinking about taking.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Whether you want to admit it or not, being a dishonest person slowly chips away at your inner core. There'll be a divide between who you say you are and the person you actually are.

This. Read this. Assuming you are not a sociopath, this will not do good things for your sense of self

NP. This is not true. People tend to be broken up and sorry to begin with, but then they realize the world isn't ending, and it's no big deal in the large scheme of things. In other words, it works the other way around for non-sociopaths.

No big deal until you are caught and your kids see you as a cheater for the rest of their lives. Hope she was worth it...

My daughter was mad at me for a while, that's true. It has affected our relationship. She is hurt, angry, upset, appalled, offended, grossed out. All that. And she probably still feels those things. But she still loves me. And she still picks me over my spouse about 75% of the time (down from 90% of the time pre-affair). And of course I wish she didn't know, of course. But she and we are working through it all.

Yet there’s no apology in your post for the extra rides on the co*ck carousel you took. I’m sure in your mind you “deserved” it and felt it was worth it.