Why can't folks that send their kids to average colleges ever admit it?

[Anonymous]

I would assume that most people don't "admit" the school is average because they aren't thinking about that. They aren't thinking, "well, since Larla is not gifted and thoroughly average, we are sending her to the totally vanilla State University, which is right at her unremarkable pace". That's just not how people think. They are thinking about fit and explaining why the school is a fit- it has a program for this or that. OP, you have a very strange worldview.

[Anonymous]

13 pages of parents doing exactly what the OP called out. Too funny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:13 pages of parents doing exactly what the OP called out. Too funny.

You still don't get it.

[Anonymous]

OP,

Does your child go to an "average school"?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are in average colleges, mostly because they got great merit scholorships. I'll even proudly name the schools...

DS (27) went to Ole Miss. ROTC scholarship. Plus National Guard.
DS (25) went to Colorado. ROTC Scholorship
DD (24) went to Florida. National Merit Scholar. Full ride.
DD (21) at Georgia. Partial merit scholarship.
DS (17) High school senior. Wants to go to Florida. We'll see who offers the most money.

Super proud of all five. My oldest is married with a baby. They own a business together. He is also a Captain in the Army National Guard. My second is a Captain in the Army - 82nd Airborne. My third is a teacher in DC. My fourth is majoring in nursing. She wants to be a nurse practitioner. My youngest thinks he wants to be an engineer.

Average colleges. No student loan debt. Great kids.

Only on DCUM are those average colleges! Those are all flagship public research universities. Not average!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
OP,

Does your child go to an "average school"?

I think it's clear that OP must have gone to an "average school." Otherwise, s/he would have been able to write a grammatically correct thread title.

[Anonymous]

OP, why are you staking your personal worth as a human being on your kids?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At a recent wedding reception, Dude thought he was impressing my sister:

Dude: Where do you go to school?
Sister: University of Florida
Dude: I go to Harvard.
Sister: Really? Where's that?

Boom! Drops mic!

Good Lord, just how ignorant is your sister?

Scary.

[Anonymous]

I have never met anyone IRL who thinks/acts like OP. And all the OP defenders - who are you people?!?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't think OP is thinking UVA is anything but average.

The very definition of average. As bad as Michigan. Might as well just call it a day and become an auto mechanic.

What's wrong with being an auto mechanic?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not that people won't literally name the college; it's how they bend over backwards defending and rationalizing the 'decision'. It's desperate.

I don't have kids (and likely won't), so I really don't have a dog in this fight.

But maybe they bend over backwards rationalizing the decision because the entire thing (kids and college) is a big and difficult and expensive decision. It doesn't mean they are desperate. I just means they are ambivalent. That's okay.

For what it's worth, I can deal with ambivalent people, but I can deal with smug people. I'll even take desperate over smug.

I'll add this tidbit, as a person who doesn't have kids, the longwinded conversations about schools and colleges and giftedness and whatever is all kind of boring anyhow. They're important decisions for families to make, but they're not necessarily interesting topics to other people.

[Anonymous]

I know that most of our peers were amazed (not in a good way) when our son enlisted in the military. He's now a top honor grad from an "average" school and is in high demand from top grad schools, with zero debt. A lot of his peers who went to prestigious schools are still being supported by their parents and will not consider taking jobs beneath their dignity, though a few have gone back to get teaching certification.
I'm not worried about impressing you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's not that people won't literally name the college; it's how they bend over backwards defending and rationalizing the 'decision'. It's desperate.

My experience is the people bend over backwards 1st to explain why they are sending their child to private school (despite being in a DCUM top district) and then bend over backwards explaining why their child is not going to an in state university (despite living in VA).

[Anonymous]

In the case of our circle, it's because both parents went to elite colleges and did really well, but raised average students with much less ambition and it's kinda sad that two driven people got wealthy, handed everything to their kids, so the kids don't have the drive to get good grades and scores and go to excellent schools.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In the case of our circle, it's because both parents went to elite colleges and did really well, but raised average students with much less ambition and it's kinda sad that two driven people got wealthy, handed everything to their kids, so the kids don't have the drive to get good grades and scores and go to excellent schools.

It may be that one of the benefits of privilege is feeling like there are other options besides being a grind. I mean if your parents work like dogs and all they have to show for it is some drab box in Arlington you might decide a different path is your thing.