I don't want my kid to be the only white student . . .

[Anonymous]

Amen!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

It is this attitude that is a source of a lot of the racial tension -- the poor AA community that is being pushed out of some areas, only to be concentrated in other areas and not actually bear the fruits of gentrification in the area they've lived their *entire* lives.

I'm not sure what you're suggesting. I think we can all agree that no one should be forcibly removed from their homes - but I don't think that's what the complaint is. As an area improves, property values go up, as do rents. If poor people - of any race - can't afford those increased rents, or afford to purchase a home, or pay for all the related expenses that come with homeownership, what shoudl be done? Should a property owner be prohibited from raising rents? Required to sell a property for below market value? There is no inherent right to live in a neighborhood because you have lived there for a long time, or even because your grandparents lived there.

I'd love to live in Kalorama, but can't afford to. Who do I see about my subsidy?

I think the question of what should be done is a hard one, and it may be that there isn't a solution that is legal and ethical. But one thing we don't need do is pretend that when high risk families are forced out a neighborhood, and replaced by affluent families, that it's an indication that a school got "better" or that the families that were there first should be grateful.

It's like comparing 2 pediatric oncologists. One stayed current with the latest research, he developed his clinical skills, and followed best practices, with the result being a slow but steady increase in 5 year survival rates. In his field, that's a miracle, because every little increase represents the lives of precious children.

Meanwhile, his colleague decides to change his career path. He quits oncology and opens a pediatrics practice. Now most of the children he sees are healthy kids with sniffles or who need school physicals. His 5 year survival rates shoot through the roof. Should we be even more impressed? Should we be shouting to the heavens about his miracle? Of course not, because the increase in numbers doesn't mean a change in outcome for any individual child.

When a poster talks about "turning a school around", and what they really means in putting affluent white children in seats once occupied by poor black children (the latter having been forced to PG county), they're talking about the latter. It's not a cause of celebration. Even if test scores go up.

Are you suggesting the expectations cannot be raised for poor black kids or that teachers and parents cannot push them to excel? Pretty defeatist.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Count me as another person who in 40 years traveling to 5 totally different states has never heard a black person call a white person names like cracker or a white person call a black person names like nigger except in a book or TV. Middle income neighborhoods don't use these words from my observations. Each race has their exclusions, but not by name calling. You just hear things like "Yesterday my mom and I had our asian friends over for a party." FCPS high school I graduated at had senior superlatives with at least 1/4 black, 1/4 asian, and 1/2 white. Everyone seemed to get along well enough and still do. Maybe living in the suburbs wasn't so bad after all.

Me too. I grew up in the midwest and in the south, lived in a major west-coast city and in another major east-coast city, before moving to DC in my late 20s. I was aware of the n-word, but I never heard someone direct it at another person til I left the midwest. And it wasn't until I moved to DC that someone called me a "cracker bitch" for the first time. And it's not that there weren't any african americans where I'd lived, or that I never interacted with them. I just never encountered the overt racial hatred and racially-based agression that exists here in the nation's capital.

+1, except I am from the south!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

This post really makes me want to call troll, but just in case...

CWC,

I am the AA poster earlier in this thread who responded by saying we do not have a "hood pass" for profanity. Just so you know, we don't have any kind of pass for rape threats, either.

I don't know why the question of race is even coming up for you in this instance. This is not a quesion of race, it's a question of safety, and your daughter's and her friend's safety has been threatened, more than once.

Tell her teachers, tell the principal, get his parents involved, don't send your daughter to school on Monday without addressing this. If you are afraid of retaliation, remove your daughter from the school if need be -- hopefully you are already investigating other options. Nothing you are afraid of, no school, is worth rape, or teaching your daughter that a person who threatens her safety even once, let alone routinely, should not be taken seriously.

Best of luck to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it is true that Prince George's has been left behind but in addition to the crime perception, there is also a huge (and very much justified) public corruption problem that simply does not exist on the same scale in Arlington, Alexandria, Montgomery, Howard, and Fairfax Counties.

There's plenty of public corruption in other counties. However, the local media focuses more heavily on the corruption in PG, and I think that's another form of racism.

For example, the county executive in Anne Arundel county is the epitome of corrupt and was just found guilty. Montgomery and Howard counties have their problems, too. There's a lot of collusion between MC officials and certain commercial development companies. and don't even get me started on DC. DC has a history of corruption among public officials, but a bunch of white people moved in, gentrified, and now businesses are flocking there (some chains even that before refused to open stores in the District).

So, no, it's not the corruption that is why PG has been left behind; it's the racism. If a bunch of white people suddenly moved in to a section of PG, a number of retail chains who were previously unwilling to open there would suddenly open stores.

As for the crime perception, if you watch the local news, whenever a crime happens in PG, they say "murder in PG county," but when it happens in another county, they say the specific area, "assault in Silver Spring" or "flash mob in Rockville" or "assault in NW." This is one way that PG County, even though it is a large area gets hit with an especially bad reputation, but Montgomery County, which has its fair share of crime, has a better public image.

No. Business does not stay away from PG because of racism. Business goes where the money is and the color it cares about is green.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it is true that Prince George's has been left behind but in addition to the crime perception, there is also a huge (and very much justified) public corruption problem that simply does not exist on the same scale in Arlington, Alexandria, Montgomery, Howard, and Fairfax Counties.

There's plenty of public corruption in other counties. However, the local media focuses more heavily on the corruption in PG, and I think that's another form of racism.

For example, the county executive in Anne Arundel county is the epitome of corrupt and was just found guilty. Montgomery and Howard counties have their problems, too. There's a lot of collusion between MC officials and certain commercial development companies. and don't even get me started on DC. DC has a history of corruption among public officials, but a bunch of white people moved in, gentrified, and now businesses are flocking there (some chains even that before refused to open stores in the District).

So, no, it's not the corruption that is why PG has been left behind; it's the racism. If a bunch of white people suddenly moved in to a section of PG, a number of retail chains who were previously unwilling to open there would suddenly open stores.

As for the crime perception, if you watch the local news, whenever a crime happens in PG, they say "murder in PG county," but when it happens in another county, they say the specific area, "assault in Silver Spring" or "flash mob in Rockville" or "assault in NW." This is one way that PG County, even though it is a large area gets hit with an especially bad reputation, but Montgomery County, which has its fair share of crime, has a better public image.

No. Business does not stay away from PG because of racism. Business goes where the money is and the color it cares about is green.

Except for the fact that it has taken an exceptionally long time for Laurel, parts of Hyattsville, University Park, Largo, Mitchellville, Bowie to get the same amenities as other counties. Fort Washington is still waiting. There is plenty of disposable cash in those communities.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

My advice is to take her out of the school to shut down this problem, avoid future problems, reduce this type of influence, and protect her safety.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

Do you have any relationship with the parents at all? One could speculate that this is somehow is way of impressing your daughter (how powerful he is) but if that's true he obviously doesn't understand it is inappropriate. His parents need to know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

You have a responsbility to protect your daughter. If this was my daughter, I will report this incident to the school counselor and principal. I will also withdraw my daughter from this school. Word of advice coming from someone who works in social services, "GET YOUR DAUGHTER AWAY FROM THE GHETTO CULTURE ASAP!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

This post really makes me want to call troll, but just in case...

CWC,

I am the AA poster earlier in this thread who responded by saying we do not have a "hood pass" for profanity. Just so you know, we don't have any kind of pass for rape threats, either.

I don't know why the question of race is even coming up for you in this instance. This is not a quesion of race, it's a question of safety, and your daughter's and her friend's safety has been threatened, more than once.

Tell her teachers, tell the principal, get his parents involved, don't send your daughter to school on Monday without addressing this. If you are afraid of retaliation, remove your daughter from the school if need be -- hopefully you are already investigating other options. Nothing you are afraid of, no school, is worth rape, or teaching your daughter that a person who threatens her safety even once, let alone routinely, should not be taken seriously.

Best of luck to you.

It's not a race thing. I grew up in a poor, white trash neighborhood and went to a poor, white trash middle school and high school. If a (white) kid did that to one of us, my parents would have been talking to the teacher, the principal, and the school board. They would have expected a response and gotten one. The only way a school can act to help a troubled kid and limit the damage he does to other kids is if they know what is going on. If you don't complain, that kid can't get help. I'm sure there will crap from his friends, but that has to be reported, too.

The most troubled kids were removed from mainstream classrooms by the time we all went to high school. They went to an alternative high school with more staff and social workers. I think a rape threat is a pretty serious sign that this kid has problems. He needs help.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think it is true that Prince George's has been left behind but in addition to the crime perception, there is also a huge (and very much justified) public corruption problem that simply does not exist on the same scale in Arlington, Alexandria, Montgomery, Howard, and Fairfax Counties.

There's plenty of public corruption in other counties. However, the local media focuses more heavily on the corruption in PG, and I think that's another form of racism.

For example, the county executive in Anne Arundel county is the epitome of corrupt and was just found guilty. Montgomery and Howard counties have their problems, too. There's a lot of collusion between MC officials and certain commercial development companies. and don't even get me started on DC. DC has a history of corruption among public officials, but a bunch of white people moved in, gentrified, and now businesses are flocking there (some chains even that before refused to open stores in the District).

So, no, it's not the corruption that is why PG has been left behind; it's the racism. If a bunch of white people suddenly moved in to a section of PG, a number of retail chains who were previously unwilling to open there would suddenly open stores.

As for the crime perception, if you watch the local news, whenever a crime happens in PG, they say "murder in PG county," but when it happens in another county, they say the specific area, "assault in Silver Spring" or "flash mob in Rockville" or "assault in NW." This is one way that PG County, even though it is a large area gets hit with an especially bad reputation, but Montgomery County, which has its fair share of crime, has a better public image.

No. Business does not stay away from PG because of racism. Business goes where the money is and the color it cares about is green.

Except for the fact that it has taken an exceptionally long time for Laurel, parts of Hyattsville, University Park, Largo, Mitchellville, Bowie to get the same amenities as other counties. Fort Washington is still waiting. There is plenty of disposable cash in those communities.

Maryland isn't the most business friendly state either. Thanks to both local and state officials for making it difficult for businesses to thrive in Maryland. Maryland has lost many bids to Virginia over the past few years due to them being more business friendly. Quite a few of businesses have and will continue to closed up shop in Maryland to relocate to Virginia. Also, when you taxed businesses to death why will they want to come to Maryland?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

And how do you know this? IT seems like you haven't taking anytime to meet the parents at BASIS. Why do you attand a PTO meeting! There is something wrong with that boy, and it has nothing to do with his race!

[Anonymous]

Did you see this PP? Please take this seriously.

http://wapo.st/16LiQhJ

http://www.washingtonpost.com/local/dc-teen-pleads-guilty-to-raping-classmate-in-the-computer-lab-of-friendship-collegiate-academy/2013/03/21/c548f6ca-9223-11e2-9173-7f87cda73b49_story.html

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That kid was not necessary even being rood. Aa english is different from mainstream english that you are familiar with.

OK. I do not mean to start a war. I am looking for advice. My daughter is not an "only" because she is mixed at a majority AA school. But she is on the light side, if it matters. Her hair is more what I would call white than her friends. She is friends with quite a few of the AA girls, and no whilte ones. But only the AA or mixed ones who are doing well or trying hard academically. She is in 6th grade at a new school. Most of the kids come from very poor neighborhoods with social problems, and she lives in a very wealthy neighborhood. There are also a few white high SES kids in her class but they are not her friends.

I do no want to rock any boats unless you all (and please take me seriously) think I should. But I don't have a context to put this into. I know what I would have done at our previous school - gone immediately to the principal and expressed concerns about this boy.

What do people think about an AA boy whispering a threat to an AA girl that he has a twin brother who is going to rape her? He has also told several people that his father has a gun and has killed people. He said this to her twice. The first time seemed like a joke, but the second she took seriously. The girl comes from the same neighborhood as the boy and does not want to say anything because she is scared of retaliation (from who, if more than just the boy, I'm not sure.) She and my daughter are very close. And my problem is the boy has a crush on my daughter.

He has liked her all year, and she did not know how to handle that in the first place (being given gifts, being asked out etc). So her friends (including the one he threatened to rape) refer to him jokingly as her "boyfriend". So do some of the other AA girls. When she tried to return the mos recent gift he put it right back in her locker. My girl is not as scared by any of this as I think she should be. She said the boy was not big. But then said he was her size. She thinks he is trying to prove to someone for some reason that he is tough or bad. She told me he told her he was going to punch a wall in just to get detention. He didn't do it, and she thought it was funny.

This is not my culture, not my socioeconomic class, and I am worried about several things. Even if everything this boy has said is a lie (we know he does not have a twin brother), I do think he must understand what the word rape means. Everyone's safety. The boy may have some emotional or psychological problem. The use of the word rape and the mentioning of a gun and his father having killed someone scare me. I am worried about the kid or someone else somehow retaliating against my daughter's friend or my daughter if anyone does something. This becoming a racially polarizing issue if we are involved at all. My daughter has explained that there are different groups of AA girls (she has no contact with most of the boys), and that her friends are not in what she refers to as the "we are so ghetto" group (she says that group says that about themselves), and that some of those girls scare her. She says they are a lot bigger than her. They are in her class along with her friends and the boy. They have never threatened her, but they are friends with the boy.

I am completely out of my depth here because I do feel like if we do the wrong thing at the least my daughter may be singled out/ostracized. This school is very important to us in terms of education, and my daughter has been doing very well socially and academically. She is happy. My daughter and this other girl are trying to decide what to do (the last threat, the real one, happened on Friday), and it is pretty clear to me that if they do anything the girls will do it together. Her parents are out of the picture. So it would be us if it comes to adults.

I am open to all suggestions. Thank you in advance for real advice, if I get that and get reamed as a racist I won't mind. In our defense, it is the girls according to my child who refer to themselves as "ghetto". And as an indication of how lost I am, I don't even really understand the point they are trying to make, good or bad... Or why my child has started to come home snapping her fingers in a funny way or some of the words she now uses. Since I am not OP, you can just call me clueless white chick for short.

And how do you know this? IT seems like you haven't taking anytime to meet the parents at BASIS. Why do you attand a PTO meeting! There is something wrong with that boy, and it has nothing to do with his race!

Agreed, what has this got to do with race or the topic. This is either a fake posting or you are completely out of touch. You have no friends at all to discuss this matter with , no relationship with any of the other parents at the school, why have you not reported this??? I would report you for neglect of parental duties!!!!!