What’s the point of redshirting when it cancels out the pride factor?

[Anonymous]

Our kid had adhd and dyslexia. You’re da*n right we red-shirted

Ya know, the discussion is not about your unusual case. We know there are unusual cases. You don't need to defend.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys who cares. The fact is, parents who redshirt their kids do it because they believe it will give their child an advantage to go to school a year late. That is their choice. It doesn’t affect you. It says something about the sort of person the parent is, and I use that information to decide if it’s really a person I’m going to like and get along with or not (usually it’s a hard no). But that’s it. Move on.

You are asking the impossible of DCUM’s anti-redshirters.

But I do a variant of the bolded myself: after reading these insane threads, if anyone says anything about being anti-redshirt in person, I stay far away from them, and when my kids were younger, I kept my kids away from them and their kids. I’ve read too many horror stories from anti-redshirt posters over the years who confessed to stuff like becoming classroom volunteers so they could gossip about kids, who encouraged their kids to be bullies to the redshirted kids, who mocked kids with disabilities, etc.

The redshirting parents in contrast were usually great, as were their kids. My kids were friends with several over the years.

As you say, it’s a datapoint. Use it and move on.

If I hear a parent badmouthing another parent or child, it’s a hard no for me. If another child is a problem, like bullying or calling names, I deal directly with the school and don’t discuss with parents.

The anti redshirting stuff peddled here would quickly isolate that parent socially, and my child went on time.

Agree. That sort of behavior does isolate parents. The person I can think of who was the loudest about anti-redshirting when my kids were in elementary was widely disliked. Nobody likes a parent who gossips about children.

There is no good reason to hold kids back except severe sn. Usually it is the older kids who bully.

Found the anti-redshirt parent everyone else hates because of how she gossips about kids!

[Anonymous]

My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys who cares. The fact is, parents who redshirt their kids do it because they believe it will give their child an advantage to go to school a year late. That is their choice. It doesn’t affect you. It says something about the sort of person the parent is, and I use that information to decide if it’s really a person I’m going to like and get along with or not (usually it’s a hard no). But that’s it. Move on.

You are asking the impossible of DCUM’s anti-redshirters.

But I do a variant of the bolded myself: after reading these insane threads, if anyone says anything about being anti-redshirt in person, I stay far away from them, and when my kids were younger, I kept my kids away from them and their kids. I’ve read too many horror stories from anti-redshirt posters over the years who confessed to stuff like becoming classroom volunteers so they could gossip about kids, who encouraged their kids to be bullies to the redshirted kids, who mocked kids with disabilities, etc.

The redshirting parents in contrast were usually great, as were their kids. My kids were friends with several over the years.

As you say, it’s a datapoint. Use it and move on.

If I hear a parent badmouthing another parent or child, it’s a hard no for me. If another child is a problem, like bullying or calling names, I deal directly with the school and don’t discuss with parents.

The anti redshirting stuff peddled here would quickly isolate that parent socially, and my child went on time.

Agree. That sort of behavior does isolate parents. The person I can think of who was the loudest about anti-redshirting when my kids were in elementary was widely disliked. Nobody likes a parent who gossips about children.

There is no good reason to hold kids back except severe sn. Usually it is the older kids who bully.

Found the anti-redshirt parent everyone else hates because of how she gossips about kids!

Why would we gossip? You do you. Just don’t expect us to praise your kid when they are not in the right grade and a year or two or more older. Sorry you cannot support your young child.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

I have the same age kid and academics are not an issue. Sports are mixed but they try but not competitive. We don’t care. They have other talents. You cannot compare him to kids a year older.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

He’s not young for his grade. I don’t know what a frontal lobe development problem is but sounds like a reason to consider waiting a year. As for sports most kids are can play and have a good time but very few are going to play in high school and college. That’s not a reason to make him go through another year of learning nothing new

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

He’s not young for his grade. I don’t know what a frontal lobe development problem is but sounds like a reason to consider waiting a year. As for sports most kids are can play and have a good time but very few are going to play in high school and college. That’s not a reason to make him go through another year of learning nothing new

No, it sounds like he’s struggling which is common at that age or he needs some help and holding back will not fix either. July birthday should go on time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

I have the same age kid and academics are not an issue. Sports are mixed but they try but not competitive. We don’t care. They have other talents. You cannot compare him to kids a year older.

I don't know what you mean by I cannot compare him to kids a year older. I can. And to his brothers who were not young for their grades. I was simply sharing our own experience.

I am glad academics are not an issue for you though or that you don't care about sports.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

He’s not young for his grade. I don’t know what a frontal lobe development problem is but sounds like a reason to consider waiting a year. As for sports most kids are can play and have a good time but very few are going to play in high school and college. That’s not a reason to make him go through another year of learning nothing new

He is definitely young for his grade and yes his lack of maturation relative to kids born 9 months earlier or whatever has affected his sports opportunities in high school. College is not the issue. Since you don't know what frontal lobe development is vis a vis teens, I will just stop here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

He’s not young for his grade. I don’t know what a frontal lobe development problem is but sounds like a reason to consider waiting a year. As for sports most kids are can play and have a good time but very few are going to play in high school and college. That’s not a reason to make him go through another year of learning nothing new

No, it sounds like he’s struggling which is common at that age or he needs some help and holding back will not fix either. July birthday should go on time.

Holding back is not an option. I was simply sharing the reality of my 'on time' late July kid's experience the first 2 years of HS.

[Anonymous]

We held back or DS at pre-K. Applied for him to attend a school as either pre-k or k, and he was admitted for pre-k. We decided to take the offer as we loved the school and I liked the idea of his being home an extra year and his having his license to drive on the early side. He’s now a junior in college and all turned out well.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys who cares. The fact is, parents who redshirt their kids do it because they believe it will give their child an advantage to go to school a year late. That is their choice. It doesn’t affect you. It says something about the sort of person the parent is, and I use that information to decide if it’s really a person I’m going to like and get along with or not (usually it’s a hard no). But that’s it. Move on.

You are asking the impossible of DCUM’s anti-redshirters.

But I do a variant of the bolded myself: after reading these insane threads, if anyone says anything about being anti-redshirt in person, I stay far away from them, and when my kids were younger, I kept my kids away from them and their kids. I’ve read too many horror stories from anti-redshirt posters over the years who confessed to stuff like becoming classroom volunteers so they could gossip about kids, who encouraged their kids to be bullies to the redshirted kids, who mocked kids with disabilities, etc.

The redshirting parents in contrast were usually great, as were their kids. My kids were friends with several over the years.

As you say, it’s a datapoint. Use it and move on.

If I hear a parent badmouthing another parent or child, it’s a hard no for me. If another child is a problem, like bullying or calling names, I deal directly with the school and don’t discuss with parents.

The anti redshirting stuff peddled here would quickly isolate that parent socially, and my child went on time.

Agree. That sort of behavior does isolate parents. The person I can think of who was the loudest about anti-redshirting when my kids were in elementary was widely disliked. Nobody likes a parent who gossips about children.

There is no good reason to hold kids back except severe sn. Usually it is the older kids who bully.

Found the anti-redshirt parent everyone else hates because of how she gossips about kids!

Why would we gossip? You do you. Just don’t expect us to praise your kid when they are not in the right grade and a year or two or more older. Sorry you cannot support your young child.

I didn’t redshirt and have a young for grade child.

I have no idea why you people gossip. None of the rest of the parents want to talk with you because you gossip about children. You’d have to ask your fellow anti-redshirters why you people gossip so much about other people’s children. The rest of us have no idea why you do it, we just know we have to keep our kids away from you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We held back or DS at pre-K. Applied for him to attend a school as either pre-k or k, and he was admitted for pre-k. We decided to take the offer as we loved the school and I liked the idea of his being home an extra year and his having his license to drive on the early side. He’s now a junior in college and all turned out well.

He’d have his license on the later side if he went on time. My young for the grade does not get their license till the end of junior year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Guys who cares. The fact is, parents who redshirt their kids do it because they believe it will give their child an advantage to go to school a year late. That is their choice. It doesn’t affect you. It says something about the sort of person the parent is, and I use that information to decide if it’s really a person I’m going to like and get along with or not (usually it’s a hard no). But that’s it. Move on.

You are asking the impossible of DCUM’s anti-redshirters.

But I do a variant of the bolded myself: after reading these insane threads, if anyone says anything about being anti-redshirt in person, I stay far away from them, and when my kids were younger, I kept my kids away from them and their kids. I’ve read too many horror stories from anti-redshirt posters over the years who confessed to stuff like becoming classroom volunteers so they could gossip about kids, who encouraged their kids to be bullies to the redshirted kids, who mocked kids with disabilities, etc.

The redshirting parents in contrast were usually great, as were their kids. My kids were friends with several over the years.

As you say, it’s a datapoint. Use it and move on.

If I hear a parent badmouthing another parent or child, it’s a hard no for me. If another child is a problem, like bullying or calling names, I deal directly with the school and don’t discuss with parents.

The anti redshirting stuff peddled here would quickly isolate that parent socially, and my child went on time.

Agree. That sort of behavior does isolate parents. The person I can think of who was the loudest about anti-redshirting when my kids were in elementary was widely disliked. Nobody likes a parent who gossips about children.

There is no good reason to hold kids back except severe sn. Usually it is the older kids who bully.

Found the anti-redshirt parent everyone else hates because of how she gossips about kids!

Why would we gossip? You do you. Just don’t expect us to praise your kid when they are not in the right grade and a year or two or more older. Sorry you cannot support your young child.

I didn’t redshirt and have a young for grade child.

I have no idea why you people gossip. None of the rest of the parents want to talk with you because you gossip about children. You’d have to ask your fellow anti-redshirters why you people gossip so much about other people’s children. The rest of us have no idea why you do it, we just know we have to keep our kids away from you.

People gossip. It has nothing to do with holding back. They especially gossip about the bullies who are usually the older kids or that was our experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ds is a late July birthday and turns 16 this year. He is just finishing up his sophomore year in HS. The difference between him and his classmates has never been more apparent than the last 2 years. It has definitely hurt him in sports, which he really dislikes, and I think academically due to frontal lobe development. He just isn't taking school as seriously as he should or like his older siblings did as older sophomores.

I think he would have benefited from 'redshirting' for these reason, but when we made the decision to start him in school he was very ready and ahead of his peers. That said, he is doing just fine and will be fine.

He’s not young for his grade. I don’t know what a frontal lobe development problem is but sounds like a reason to consider waiting a year. As for sports most kids are can play and have a good time but very few are going to play in high school and college. That’s not a reason to make him go through another year of learning nothing new

He is definitely young for his grade and yes his lack of maturation relative to kids born 9 months earlier or whatever has affected his sports opportunities in high school. College is not the issue. Since you don't know what frontal lobe development is vis a vis teens, I will just stop here.

In hs sports are not by age or grade so if he was top it wouldn’t matter.