High Value Man - AMA

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I’ve been watching this thread with detachment and it’s interesting to see that the OP, who definitely has issues, has been reasonably restrained considering how many posters have been hissing and yowling and scratching at him. I’ve learned that a self-proclaimed HVM is someone to steer clear of, but the people going after him are far worse.

OP here. Without question, I have issues. You just have to be committed to continued growth and evolution as a person. None of us is perfect.

Question: What are your big 5 "issues" and how are you "committed to continued growth and evolution as a person" in regard to them?

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Value is demand based. In the past six months, how many women have gone out on more than two dates with you?

I'm not in the dating market anymore, but when I was getting dates was fairly trivial. I think that is an imprecise measure of demand though. Inbound interest and friends trying to set you up are also indicative, especially because women are not as inclined to be bold and forthright in their expressions of interest. Going on a bunch of dates is quite time consuming. Quality over quantity. Every woman I have ever dated seriously would still probably get back with me if things came to that.

So...none? In the past month, you've not found a woman willing to go on more than two dates with you? Interesting.

Also "if things came to that" means if things came to what? If they had no more options?

I'm not in the dating market right now and even when I was there were periods when I was so consumed with other endeavors that I was not tallying up the number of dates I had been on. I have had four serious relationships if that is what you are asking.

If it came to that means that if in the future we both found ourselves single and I expressed desire to rekindle, they would likely not be opposed. People change and you never know, but that is the impression I have.

What make think that's actually true? As a woman, I would guess that your exes have moved on long ago.

It's his delusion speaking. Very narcissistic to think of himself as such high value, and so deluded to think all of his exes (apparently 3) would take him back in heartbeat

It is what it is. If you have some things that you need to work through, do that, but I think I know these women better than you do.

You used to know them. You are missing how many of our exes would find this disqualifying.

I can confidently say that I know them better than you do. You're very presumptuous. Why are you so pressed for a "gotcha"? Strange behavior, but go off.

No high value woman is going around giving hints that she’d get back together with the guy who broke up with her. No high value woman is going to get back together with a guy posting on a message board that he could get back together with anyone of his serious exes if he tried to rekindle.

And which of these exes would really want to get back with someone begging for attention on a mommy website? So unbecoming.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Okay, I'll bite:

1) What is your biggest fear, and how much of your life is spent/has been spent trying to avoid it?

My biggest fear is dying young and leaving those close to me vulnerable. I've tried to pay close attention to fitness and diet. In some senses I have not been great at avoiding certain aspects of this, because I deal with a lot of stress. This weighs on me a lot.

2) What has been your greatest joy in your 30(ish) years on the planet so far?

Honestly, I really enjoyed college. It was a time of a lot of learning and growth and I had a great deal of exposure to some incredibly talented and bright people from very different walks of life. It's very tough to recreate that dynamic and freedom in the working world. Beyond that, I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments". Seeing that sort of thing up close and personal is more appealing to me than contributing to some macro cause on which I probably won't make a dent.

3) If money were no issue, where would you live, what would you do there, and why?

I like Capetown a lot, but it would probably be somewhere in the States that is a smaller town but with a major city close by. I would read and write more and cultivate hobbies that I have forgone. I would also try to recreate the vibe I mention in the previous answer with friends and interesting people just getting together and talking. I would also try to get really immersed in a smaller community. This is something that is increasingly lacking with increased geographic mobility in modern society. I don't think money will be the limiting or determinative factor though. It will be the degree to which I can scale back ambition.

4) Do you have any pets? If so, plz describe.

No pets.

Answers in italics.

Critical f/u Q: Why no pets?

Just no desire to have one and travel obligations.

Nope. Sorry. No "high value" person has zero desire to have a pet, especially with the "I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments"" mentality.

Travel, I get, but a high-value man makes enough money to afford boarding or in-home care for a pet, or would at least have a "maybe when my lifestyle calms a bit" approach. But "no desire"? Red flag. Having a pet is a much better predictor of emotional capacity than your "sixes".

Then again, "high value" is kinda like "expert". When accurate, it's a title given to you by others. Very few self-proclaimed HV men really are, at least by the metrics most would use. But your skewed metric was also disclosed by your "sixes" comment.

Good luck with your "high value" lifestyle, though.

This is quite silly. Not everyone has the same preferences as you. Get over it. You seem to suffer from solipsism.

Nah, bruh. It's just a quick test to see how you'd treat things you can't fsck or profit from. You don't have to have the same preferences I do. You do need better reasons than you gave, which are sus. You may be a decent person w/o pets, but it raises questions and your ongoing replies support my original theory.

Your "test" is silly. If you prefer that in the people you date, enjoy. Stop centering yourself and imposing your values and preferences on everyone. It's not a good look.

I do enjoy silliness in my partners, yes. A sense of humor and a lighthearted approach to life is usually enjoyable. I am not "imposing my values and preferences on everyone". I have preferences, and you wouldn't meet them (which is fine). That you're now getting nasty and defensive is the third strike. Not being able to handle a difference in opinion/approach without nastiness is a hard stop for me in a potential partner. We're going to have conflicts, and if your response to them is default to big word namecalling before emotionally/mentally short-circuiting, we won't get through them.

A truly high-value man, one who had done some therapy and acquired greater emotional intelligence, would already know that.

If you are on the market, start a thread about what you prefer in a partner and maybe some magic will happen for you. I am not your therapist; nor do I particularly care what you look for in a partner. This may come as a shock to you, but different women prefer different things and you and your preferences are not the center of the universe. I am. (JK)

Not only are you not my therapist, your continued defensiveness strongly suggests you don't have one of your own, or even the emotional competence to know you need one.

You started a thread calling yourself a high-value man. You have shown yourself to be distinctly less than. I suppose it's a valuable lesson to single women reading it, in that it's pointing out the tells and making your nonsense pretty clear. Of course, as several posters have already said, the use of "high value", "alpha", "lion" and the like should immediately raise a few flags.

That you keep taking personal swings at anyone who disagrees with your self-assessment is the most revealing component of this little "social experiment" you started. I, for one, appreciate the ability to dissect one of you so-called HVMs in real time. The implosion is impressive.

You want so badly for me to be bent out of shape. It's a little strange. Stop it. Behave.

Op is so gross 🤢 🤮
Every post more clearly demonstrates how low value they are. But of course someone who is this full of themselves and isn’t even married is… a stretch to begin with.

Nothing wrong with a little decorum. Derailing is not nice behavior.

Is your behavior, insulting women on a mommy website and telling them to "behave" the decorum you mean? That's a bizarre projection on your part.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:NP. I’ve been watching this thread with detachment and it’s interesting to see that the OP, who definitely has issues, has been reasonably restrained considering how many posters have been hissing and yowling and scratching at him. I’ve learned that a self-proclaimed HVM is someone to steer clear of, but the people going after him are far worse.

OP here. Without question, I have issues. You just have to be committed to continued growth and evolution as a person. None of us is perfect.

Question: What are your big 5 "issues" and how are you "committed to continued growth and evolution as a person" in regard to them?

This will be too long of an answer to address all of that, so I will only do a few. In my younger years, I had a tendency to cut people off too easily and not give them the benefit of the doubt. I realized that this is not the healthiest impulse for forming strong connections. I have evolved to try to have more empathy, grant people more grace for whatever difficulties they may be experiencing in moments when they have not presented themselves in the best light and tried to step outside of my own head, experiences and thought processes to better understand where I might have blind spots that don't allow me to see where they might be coming from. This is all still a work in progress. Life is hard.

Another has been communication. To keep it short, I have tried become a better, more active listener and less blunt in my approach. As has been exhibited in this thread, this is also a work in progress

I have a committee of trusted people who know me well enough to help point out blind spots and give me perspective, but at the end of the day you have to go with your own gut and discernment.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Okay, I'll bite:

1) What is your biggest fear, and how much of your life is spent/has been spent trying to avoid it?

My biggest fear is dying young and leaving those close to me vulnerable. I've tried to pay close attention to fitness and diet. In some senses I have not been great at avoiding certain aspects of this, because I deal with a lot of stress. This weighs on me a lot.

2) What has been your greatest joy in your 30(ish) years on the planet so far?

Honestly, I really enjoyed college. It was a time of a lot of learning and growth and I had a great deal of exposure to some incredibly talented and bright people from very different walks of life. It's very tough to recreate that dynamic and freedom in the working world. Beyond that, I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments". Seeing that sort of thing up close and personal is more appealing to me than contributing to some macro cause on which I probably won't make a dent.

3) If money were no issue, where would you live, what would you do there, and why?

I like Capetown a lot, but it would probably be somewhere in the States that is a smaller town but with a major city close by. I would read and write more and cultivate hobbies that I have forgone. I would also try to recreate the vibe I mention in the previous answer with friends and interesting people just getting together and talking. I would also try to get really immersed in a smaller community. This is something that is increasingly lacking with increased geographic mobility in modern society. I don't think money will be the limiting or determinative factor though. It will be the degree to which I can scale back ambition.

4) Do you have any pets? If so, plz describe.

No pets.

Answers in italics.

Critical f/u Q: Why no pets?

Just no desire to have one and travel obligations.

Nope. Sorry. No "high value" person has zero desire to have a pet, especially with the "I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments"" mentality.

Travel, I get, but a high-value man makes enough money to afford boarding or in-home care for a pet, or would at least have a "maybe when my lifestyle calms a bit" approach. But "no desire"? Red flag. Having a pet is a much better predictor of emotional capacity than your "sixes".

Then again, "high value" is kinda like "expert". When accurate, it's a title given to you by others. Very few self-proclaimed HV men really are, at least by the metrics most would use. But your skewed metric was also disclosed by your "sixes" comment.

Good luck with your "high value" lifestyle, though.

This is quite silly. Not everyone has the same preferences as you. Get over it. You seem to suffer from solipsism.

Nah, bruh. It's just a quick test to see how you'd treat things you can't fsck or profit from. You don't have to have the same preferences I do. You do need better reasons than you gave, which are sus. You may be a decent person w/o pets, but it raises questions and your ongoing replies support my original theory.

Your "test" is silly. If you prefer that in the people you date, enjoy. Stop centering yourself and imposing your values and preferences on everyone. It's not a good look.

I do enjoy silliness in my partners, yes. A sense of humor and a lighthearted approach to life is usually enjoyable. I am not "imposing my values and preferences on everyone". I have preferences, and you wouldn't meet them (which is fine). That you're now getting nasty and defensive is the third strike. Not being able to handle a difference in opinion/approach without nastiness is a hard stop for me in a potential partner. We're going to have conflicts, and if your response to them is default to big word namecalling before emotionally/mentally short-circuiting, we won't get through them.

A truly high-value man, one who had done some therapy and acquired greater emotional intelligence, would already know that.

If you are on the market, start a thread about what you prefer in a partner and maybe some magic will happen for you. I am not your therapist; nor do I particularly care what you look for in a partner. This may come as a shock to you, but different women prefer different things and you and your preferences are not the center of the universe. I am. (JK)

Not only are you not my therapist, your continued defensiveness strongly suggests you don't have one of your own, or even the emotional competence to know you need one.

You started a thread calling yourself a high-value man. You have shown yourself to be distinctly less than. I suppose it's a valuable lesson to single women reading it, in that it's pointing out the tells and making your nonsense pretty clear. Of course, as several posters have already said, the use of "high value", "alpha", "lion" and the like should immediately raise a few flags.

That you keep taking personal swings at anyone who disagrees with your self-assessment is the most revealing component of this little "social experiment" you started. I, for one, appreciate the ability to dissect one of you so-called HVMs in real time. The implosion is impressive.

You want so badly for me to be bent out of shape. It's a little strange. Stop it. Behave.

Op is so gross 🤢 🤮
Every post more clearly demonstrates how low value they are. But of course someone who is this full of themselves and isn’t even married is… a stretch to begin with.

Nothing wrong with a little decorum. Derailing is not nice behavior.

Is your behavior, insulting women on a mommy website and telling them to "behave" the decorum you mean? That's a bizarre projection on your part.

Yes, derailing typically runs afoul of behavior that people like to see on forums.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, I'll bite:

1) What is your biggest fear, and how much of your life is spent/has been spent trying to avoid it?

My biggest fear is dying young and leaving those close to me vulnerable. I've tried to pay close attention to fitness and diet. In some senses I have not been great at avoiding certain aspects of this, because I deal with a lot of stress. This weighs on me a lot.

2) What has been your greatest joy in your 30(ish) years on the planet so far?

Honestly, I really enjoyed college. It was a time of a lot of learning and growth and I had a great deal of exposure to some incredibly talented and bright people from very different walks of life. It's very tough to recreate that dynamic and freedom in the working world. Beyond that, I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments". Seeing that sort of thing up close and personal is more appealing to me than contributing to some macro cause on which I probably won't make a dent.

3) If money were no issue, where would you live, what would you do there, and why?

I like Capetown a lot, but it would probably be somewhere in the States that is a smaller town but with a major city close by. I would read and write more and cultivate hobbies that I have forgone. I would also try to recreate the vibe I mention in the previous answer with friends and interesting people just getting together and talking. I would also try to get really immersed in a smaller community. This is something that is increasingly lacking with increased geographic mobility in modern society. I don't think money will be the limiting or determinative factor though. It will be the degree to which I can scale back ambition.

4) Do you have any pets? If so, plz describe.

No pets.

Answers in italics.

Critical f/u Q: Why no pets?

Just no desire to have one and travel obligations.

Nope. Sorry. No "high value" person has zero desire to have a pet, especially with the "I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments"" mentality.

Travel, I get, but a high-value man makes enough money to afford boarding or in-home care for a pet, or would at least have a "maybe when my lifestyle calms a bit" approach. But "no desire"? Red flag. Having a pet is a much better predictor of emotional capacity than your "sixes".

Then again, "high value" is kinda like "expert". When accurate, it's a title given to you by others. Very few self-proclaimed HV men really are, at least by the metrics most would use. But your skewed metric was also disclosed by your "sixes" comment.

Good luck with your "high value" lifestyle, though.

This is quite silly. Not everyone has the same preferences as you. Get over it. You seem to suffer from solipsism.

Nah, bruh. It's just a quick test to see how you'd treat things you can't fsck or profit from. You don't have to have the same preferences I do. You do need better reasons than you gave, which are sus. You may be a decent person w/o pets, but it raises questions and your ongoing replies support my original theory.

Your "test" is silly. If you prefer that in the people you date, enjoy. Stop centering yourself and imposing your values and preferences on everyone. It's not a good look.

I do enjoy silliness in my partners, yes. A sense of humor and a lighthearted approach to life is usually enjoyable. I am not "imposing my values and preferences on everyone". I have preferences, and you wouldn't meet them (which is fine). That you're now getting nasty and defensive is the third strike. Not being able to handle a difference in opinion/approach without nastiness is a hard stop for me in a potential partner. We're going to have conflicts, and if your response to them is default to big word namecalling before emotionally/mentally short-circuiting, we won't get through them.

A truly high-value man, one who had done some therapy and acquired greater emotional intelligence, would already know that.

If you are on the market, start a thread about what you prefer in a partner and maybe some magic will happen for you. I am not your therapist; nor do I particularly care what you look for in a partner. This may come as a shock to you, but different women prefer different things and you and your preferences are not the center of the universe. I am. (JK)

Not only are you not my therapist, your continued defensiveness strongly suggests you don't have one of your own, or even the emotional competence to know you need one.

You started a thread calling yourself a high-value man. You have shown yourself to be distinctly less than. I suppose it's a valuable lesson to single women reading it, in that it's pointing out the tells and making your nonsense pretty clear. Of course, as several posters have already said, the use of "high value", "alpha", "lion" and the like should immediately raise a few flags.

That you keep taking personal swings at anyone who disagrees with your self-assessment is the most revealing component of this little "social experiment" you started. I, for one, appreciate the ability to dissect one of you so-called HVMs in real time. The implosion is impressive.

You want so badly for me to be bent out of shape. It's a little strange. Stop it. Behave.

Op is so gross 🤢 🤮
Every post more clearly demonstrates how low value they are. But of course someone who is this full of themselves and isn’t even married is… a stretch to begin with.

Nothing wrong with a little decorum. Derailing is not nice behavior.

Is your behavior, insulting women on a mommy website and telling them to "behave" the decorum you mean? That's a bizarre projection on your part.

Yes, derailing typically runs afoul of behavior that people like to see on forums.

You may be OP but you are not the boss of the thread.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, I'll bite:

1) What is your biggest fear, and how much of your life is spent/has been spent trying to avoid it?

My biggest fear is dying young and leaving those close to me vulnerable. I've tried to pay close attention to fitness and diet. In some senses I have not been great at avoiding certain aspects of this, because I deal with a lot of stress. This weighs on me a lot.

2) What has been your greatest joy in your 30(ish) years on the planet so far?

Honestly, I really enjoyed college. It was a time of a lot of learning and growth and I had a great deal of exposure to some incredibly talented and bright people from very different walks of life. It's very tough to recreate that dynamic and freedom in the working world. Beyond that, I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments". Seeing that sort of thing up close and personal is more appealing to me than contributing to some macro cause on which I probably won't make a dent.

3) If money were no issue, where would you live, what would you do there, and why?

I like Capetown a lot, but it would probably be somewhere in the States that is a smaller town but with a major city close by. I would read and write more and cultivate hobbies that I have forgone. I would also try to recreate the vibe I mention in the previous answer with friends and interesting people just getting together and talking. I would also try to get really immersed in a smaller community. This is something that is increasingly lacking with increased geographic mobility in modern society. I don't think money will be the limiting or determinative factor though. It will be the degree to which I can scale back ambition.

4) Do you have any pets? If so, plz describe.

No pets.

Answers in italics.

Critical f/u Q: Why no pets?

Just no desire to have one and travel obligations.

Nope. Sorry. No "high value" person has zero desire to have a pet, especially with the "I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments"" mentality.

Travel, I get, but a high-value man makes enough money to afford boarding or in-home care for a pet, or would at least have a "maybe when my lifestyle calms a bit" approach. But "no desire"? Red flag. Having a pet is a much better predictor of emotional capacity than your "sixes".

Then again, "high value" is kinda like "expert". When accurate, it's a title given to you by others. Very few self-proclaimed HV men really are, at least by the metrics most would use. But your skewed metric was also disclosed by your "sixes" comment.

Good luck with your "high value" lifestyle, though.

This is quite silly. Not everyone has the same preferences as you. Get over it. You seem to suffer from solipsism.

Nah, bruh. It's just a quick test to see how you'd treat things you can't fsck or profit from. You don't have to have the same preferences I do. You do need better reasons than you gave, which are sus. You may be a decent person w/o pets, but it raises questions and your ongoing replies support my original theory.

Your "test" is silly. If you prefer that in the people you date, enjoy. Stop centering yourself and imposing your values and preferences on everyone. It's not a good look.

I do enjoy silliness in my partners, yes. A sense of humor and a lighthearted approach to life is usually enjoyable. I am not "imposing my values and preferences on everyone". I have preferences, and you wouldn't meet them (which is fine). That you're now getting nasty and defensive is the third strike. Not being able to handle a difference in opinion/approach without nastiness is a hard stop for me in a potential partner. We're going to have conflicts, and if your response to them is default to big word namecalling before emotionally/mentally short-circuiting, we won't get through them.

A truly high-value man, one who had done some therapy and acquired greater emotional intelligence, would already know that.

If you are on the market, start a thread about what you prefer in a partner and maybe some magic will happen for you. I am not your therapist; nor do I particularly care what you look for in a partner. This may come as a shock to you, but different women prefer different things and you and your preferences are not the center of the universe. I am. (JK)

Not only are you not my therapist, your continued defensiveness strongly suggests you don't have one of your own, or even the emotional competence to know you need one.

You started a thread calling yourself a high-value man. You have shown yourself to be distinctly less than. I suppose it's a valuable lesson to single women reading it, in that it's pointing out the tells and making your nonsense pretty clear. Of course, as several posters have already said, the use of "high value", "alpha", "lion" and the like should immediately raise a few flags.

That you keep taking personal swings at anyone who disagrees with your self-assessment is the most revealing component of this little "social experiment" you started. I, for one, appreciate the ability to dissect one of you so-called HVMs in real time. The implosion is impressive.

You want so badly for me to be bent out of shape. It's a little strange. Stop it. Behave.

Op is so gross 🤢 🤮
Every post more clearly demonstrates how low value they are. But of course someone who is this full of themselves and isn’t even married is… a stretch to begin with.

Nothing wrong with a little decorum. Derailing is not nice behavior.

Is your behavior, insulting women on a mommy website and telling them to "behave" the decorum you mean? That's a bizarre projection on your part.

Yes, derailing typically runs afoul of behavior that people like to see on forums.

You have fingers, feel free to use the report button if you feel so strongly! I'm sure you wouldn't want the rest of us to do the same thing, and have Jeff expose you as the fraud/troll/sock puppet you are though

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Okay, I'll bite:

1) What is your biggest fear, and how much of your life is spent/has been spent trying to avoid it?

My biggest fear is dying young and leaving those close to me vulnerable. I've tried to pay close attention to fitness and diet. In some senses I have not been great at avoiding certain aspects of this, because I deal with a lot of stress. This weighs on me a lot.

2) What has been your greatest joy in your 30(ish) years on the planet so far?

Honestly, I really enjoyed college. It was a time of a lot of learning and growth and I had a great deal of exposure to some incredibly talented and bright people from very different walks of life. It's very tough to recreate that dynamic and freedom in the working world. Beyond that, I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments". Seeing that sort of thing up close and personal is more appealing to me than contributing to some macro cause on which I probably won't make a dent.

3) If money were no issue, where would you live, what would you do there, and why?

I like Capetown a lot, but it would probably be somewhere in the States that is a smaller town but with a major city close by. I would read and write more and cultivate hobbies that I have forgone. I would also try to recreate the vibe I mention in the previous answer with friends and interesting people just getting together and talking. I would also try to get really immersed in a smaller community. This is something that is increasingly lacking with increased geographic mobility in modern society. I don't think money will be the limiting or determinative factor though. It will be the degree to which I can scale back ambition.

4) Do you have any pets? If so, plz describe.

No pets.

Answers in italics.

Critical f/u Q: Why no pets?

Just no desire to have one and travel obligations.

Nope. Sorry. No "high value" person has zero desire to have a pet, especially with the "I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments"" mentality.

Travel, I get, but a high-value man makes enough money to afford boarding or in-home care for a pet, or would at least have a "maybe when my lifestyle calms a bit" approach. But "no desire"? Red flag. Having a pet is a much better predictor of emotional capacity than your "sixes".

Then again, "high value" is kinda like "expert". When accurate, it's a title given to you by others. Very few self-proclaimed HV men really are, at least by the metrics most would use. But your skewed metric was also disclosed by your "sixes" comment.

Good luck with your "high value" lifestyle, though.

This is quite silly. Not everyone has the same preferences as you. Get over it. You seem to suffer from solipsism.

Nah, bruh. It's just a quick test to see how you'd treat things you can't fsck or profit from. You don't have to have the same preferences I do. You do need better reasons than you gave, which are sus. You may be a decent person w/o pets, but it raises questions and your ongoing replies support my original theory.

Your "test" is silly. If you prefer that in the people you date, enjoy. Stop centering yourself and imposing your values and preferences on everyone. It's not a good look.

I do enjoy silliness in my partners, yes. A sense of humor and a lighthearted approach to life is usually enjoyable. I am not "imposing my values and preferences on everyone". I have preferences, and you wouldn't meet them (which is fine). That you're now getting nasty and defensive is the third strike. Not being able to handle a difference in opinion/approach without nastiness is a hard stop for me in a potential partner. We're going to have conflicts, and if your response to them is default to big word namecalling before emotionally/mentally short-circuiting, we won't get through them.

A truly high-value man, one who had done some therapy and acquired greater emotional intelligence, would already know that.

If you are on the market, start a thread about what you prefer in a partner and maybe some magic will happen for you. I am not your therapist; nor do I particularly care what you look for in a partner. This may come as a shock to you, but different women prefer different things and you and your preferences are not the center of the universe. I am. (JK)

Not only are you not my therapist, your continued defensiveness strongly suggests you don't have one of your own, or even the emotional competence to know you need one.

You started a thread calling yourself a high-value man. You have shown yourself to be distinctly less than. I suppose it's a valuable lesson to single women reading it, in that it's pointing out the tells and making your nonsense pretty clear. Of course, as several posters have already said, the use of "high value", "alpha", "lion" and the like should immediately raise a few flags.

That you keep taking personal swings at anyone who disagrees with your self-assessment is the most revealing component of this little "social experiment" you started. I, for one, appreciate the ability to dissect one of you so-called HVMs in real time. The implosion is impressive.

You want so badly for me to be bent out of shape. It's a little strange. Stop it. Behave.

Op is so gross 🤢 🤮
Every post more clearly demonstrates how low value they are. But of course someone who is this full of themselves and isn’t even married is… a stretch to begin with.

Nothing wrong with a little decorum. Derailing is not nice behavior.

Is your behavior, insulting women on a mommy website and telling them to "behave" the decorum you mean? That's a bizarre projection on your part.

Yes, derailing typically runs afoul of behavior that people like to see on forums.

You have fingers, feel free to use the report button if you feel so strongly! I'm sure you wouldn't want the rest of us to do the same thing, and have Jeff expose you as the fraud/troll/sock puppet you are though

Not really my style. Thanks though.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Okay, I'll bite:

1) What is your biggest fear, and how much of your life is spent/has been spent trying to avoid it?

My biggest fear is dying young and leaving those close to me vulnerable. I've tried to pay close attention to fitness and diet. In some senses I have not been great at avoiding certain aspects of this, because I deal with a lot of stress. This weighs on me a lot.

2) What has been your greatest joy in your 30(ish) years on the planet so far?

Honestly, I really enjoyed college. It was a time of a lot of learning and growth and I had a great deal of exposure to some incredibly talented and bright people from very different walks of life. It's very tough to recreate that dynamic and freedom in the working world. Beyond that, I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments". Seeing that sort of thing up close and personal is more appealing to me than contributing to some macro cause on which I probably won't make a dent.

3) If money were no issue, where would you live, what would you do there, and why?

I like Capetown a lot, but it would probably be somewhere in the States that is a smaller town but with a major city close by. I would read and write more and cultivate hobbies that I have forgone. I would also try to recreate the vibe I mention in the previous answer with friends and interesting people just getting together and talking. I would also try to get really immersed in a smaller community. This is something that is increasingly lacking with increased geographic mobility in modern society. I don't think money will be the limiting or determinative factor though. It will be the degree to which I can scale back ambition.

4) Do you have any pets? If so, plz describe.

No pets.

Answers in italics.

Critical f/u Q: Why no pets?

Just no desire to have one and travel obligations.

Nope. Sorry. No "high value" person has zero desire to have a pet, especially with the "I get a tremendous amount of joy from investing in friends and family and watching them blossom. I'm a bit selfish in that I like to see the tangible fruits of my "investments"" mentality.

Travel, I get, but a high-value man makes enough money to afford boarding or in-home care for a pet, or would at least have a "maybe when my lifestyle calms a bit" approach. But "no desire"? Red flag. Having a pet is a much better predictor of emotional capacity than your "sixes".

Then again, "high value" is kinda like "expert". When accurate, it's a title given to you by others. Very few self-proclaimed HV men really are, at least by the metrics most would use. But your skewed metric was also disclosed by your "sixes" comment.

Good luck with your "high value" lifestyle, though.

This is quite silly. Not everyone has the same preferences as you. Get over it. You seem to suffer from solipsism.

Nah, bruh. It's just a quick test to see how you'd treat things you can't fsck or profit from. You don't have to have the same preferences I do. You do need better reasons than you gave, which are sus. You may be a decent person w/o pets, but it raises questions and your ongoing replies support my original theory.

Your "test" is silly. If you prefer that in the people you date, enjoy. Stop centering yourself and imposing your values and preferences on everyone. It's not a good look.

I do enjoy silliness in my partners, yes. A sense of humor and a lighthearted approach to life is usually enjoyable. I am not "imposing my values and preferences on everyone". I have preferences, and you wouldn't meet them (which is fine). That you're now getting nasty and defensive is the third strike. Not being able to handle a difference in opinion/approach without nastiness is a hard stop for me in a potential partner. We're going to have conflicts, and if your response to them is default to big word namecalling before emotionally/mentally short-circuiting, we won't get through them.

A truly high-value man, one who had done some therapy and acquired greater emotional intelligence, would already know that.

If you are on the market, start a thread about what you prefer in a partner and maybe some magic will happen for you. I am not your therapist; nor do I particularly care what you look for in a partner. This may come as a shock to you, but different women prefer different things and you and your preferences are not the center of the universe. I am. (JK)

Not only are you not my therapist, your continued defensiveness strongly suggests you don't have one of your own, or even the emotional competence to know you need one.

You started a thread calling yourself a high-value man. You have shown yourself to be distinctly less than. I suppose it's a valuable lesson to single women reading it, in that it's pointing out the tells and making your nonsense pretty clear. Of course, as several posters have already said, the use of "high value", "alpha", "lion" and the like should immediately raise a few flags.

That you keep taking personal swings at anyone who disagrees with your self-assessment is the most revealing component of this little "social experiment" you started. I, for one, appreciate the ability to dissect one of you so-called HVMs in real time. The implosion is impressive.

You want so badly for me to be bent out of shape. It's a little strange. Stop it. Behave.

Op is so gross 🤢 🤮
Every post more clearly demonstrates how low value they are. But of course someone who is this full of themselves and isn’t even married is… a stretch to begin with.

Nothing wrong with a little decorum. Derailing is not nice behavior.

Is your behavior, insulting women on a mommy website and telling them to "behave" the decorum you mean? That's a bizarre projection on your part.

Yes, derailing typically runs afoul of behavior that people like to see on forums.

You have fingers, feel free to use the report button if you feel so strongly! I'm sure you wouldn't want the rest of us to do the same thing, and have Jeff expose you as the fraud/troll/sock puppet you are though

Not really my style. Thanks though.

Uh huh, that's what I thought

[Anonymous]

Why aren't you married?

[Anonymous]

Are you a dom? Just curious, you sound vaguely like this guy I know who is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you a dom? Just curious, you sound vaguely like this guy I know who is.

Are incels considered doms?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why aren't you married?

I had other priorities after a breakup that consumed my energies and attention.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why aren't you married?

He's only dated 4 women, and none of them wanted what he was trying to sell

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Are you a dom? Just curious, you sound vaguely like this guy I know who is.

No, I'm probably not him.