“Rich” but Broke - What can we cut?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and so sick of the delusion of some of the older posters on here. "Spend 10k on a car! Drop the 5k nanny! Your house costs way too much!"

It is 2023. Housing and childcare costs are out of control. The average cost of a new car in America is over $48,000. My generation has been crippled by out of control student loans and multiple financial crises, not to mention being forced to parent young children during a global pandemic. Yes, OP has made expensive choices but guess what? This is WHAT THINGS COST in an expensive metro area in 2023.

Eh, I'm the same age as you, but OP is spending a bit much overall. They are living a CCMD lifestyle on a Brookland or Takoma budget. We have the same salary and mortgage, but we don't pay for PK3/4 and have just one car since we live near public transit. CCMD would be fine for OP if one was big law. And no, half a mil of student debt is super atypical. Most of us has more like 20-30k in student debt. Super easy to manage. We just weren't going out buying 48k+ luxury SUVs in school. Hell a brand new toyota corolla is 21k.

Not OP, but I don’t understand this. What student has $60-70K each year to pay private school tuition? Who graduates with 20-30K of student debt after 7-8 years of college and grad school? I’m a lawyer myself and have many, many, friends who went fed just to get their crippling loans forgiven after 10 years. And please don’t start with “should’ve gone to public school.” Anyone who works in Law knows Big Law firms only hire from top private law schools. Who knows what the circumstances were around that debt, but it doesn’t surprise me at all that 2 people had $500K student debt.

The irony is that your friends went to a well-regarded private law school and ended up with a fed job anyway due to public loan forgiveness. Many of us made better financial choices from the start, went to work for smaller, less prestigious firms and worked our way up to very nice salaries with little to no student loans. And, no, this wasn't in the 90s.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and so sick of the delusion of some of the older posters on here. "Spend 10k on a car! Drop the 5k nanny! Your house costs way too much!"

It is 2023. Housing and childcare costs are out of control. The average cost of a new car in America is over $48,000. My generation has been crippled by out of control student loans and multiple financial crises, not to mention being forced to parent young children during a global pandemic. Yes, OP has made expensive choices but guess what? This is WHAT THINGS COST in an expensive metro area in 2023.

Eh, I'm the same age as you, but OP is spending a bit much overall. They are living a CCMD lifestyle on a Brookland or Takoma budget. We have the same salary and mortgage, but we don't pay for PK3/4 and have just one car since we live near public transit. CCMD would be fine for OP if one was big law. And no, half a mil of student debt is super atypical. Most of us has more like 20-30k in student debt. Super easy to manage. We just weren't going out buying 48k+ luxury SUVs in school. Hell a brand new toyota corolla is 21k.

Not OP, but I don’t understand this. What student has $60-70K each year to pay private school tuition? Who graduates with 20-30K of student debt after 7-8 years of college and grad school? I’m a lawyer myself and have many, many, friends who went fed just to get their crippling loans forgiven after 10 years. And please don’t start with “should’ve gone to public school.” Anyone who works in Law knows Big Law firms only hire from top private law schools. Who knows what the circumstances were around that debt, but it doesn’t surprise me at all that 2 people had $500K student debt.

Every choice has consequences. No one forced you to pursue a career in big law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and so sick of the delusion of some of the older posters on here. "Spend 10k on a car! Drop the 5k nanny! Your house costs way too much!"

It is 2023. Housing and childcare costs are out of control. The average cost of a new car in America is over $48,000. My generation has been crippled by out of control student loans and multiple financial crises, not to mention being forced to parent young children during a global pandemic. Yes, OP has made expensive choices but guess what? This is WHAT THINGS COST in an expensive metro area in 2023.

Eh, I'm the same age as you, but OP is spending a bit much overall. They are living a CCMD lifestyle on a Brookland or Takoma budget. We have the same salary and mortgage, but we don't pay for PK3/4 and have just one car since we live near public transit. CCMD would be fine for OP if one was big law. And no, half a mil of student debt is super atypical. Most of us has more like 20-30k in student debt. Super easy to manage. We just weren't going out buying 48k+ luxury SUVs in school. Hell a brand new toyota corolla is 21k.

Lol. Find me a new Corolla that costs 21k.

https://www.toyota.com/corolla/2023/
Starting price 21,700

I’m currently looking for a new car and am considering a Corrolla. After talking with multiple dealers this week I am comfortable saying that $21,700 is very, very optimistic.

That's nice. OP bought these cars in 2016.Try to keep up.

[Anonymous]

I am SO SICK of hearing the work "crippling" used to describe student loans. No one held a gun to your head. There are lots of ways, especially for smart poor kids, to go to school for free.

[Anonymous]

do not move to DC to save a buck. you're going to spend at least 10k in moving costs and have to deal with the two little one's transitioning to a new house, which can take months to get over... and then do it all over when kindergarten starts. not worth it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You keep the cars until they run into the ground, after they are paid off.

If you have taste that is this expensive OP, I would wonder if a lot of things you are buying are also fairly expensive. Iphones instead of cheaper Androids? Premium streaming services? An expensive phone plan? Brand new clothes for the kids instead of used?

You can't do much about the house or the cars at this point, except sell them, which may not be a great idea. The other plan would be to cut back on all other expenses until the children are out of daycare and in public school.

Pfft on the clothing thing. She can buy new at Old Navy, Target, etc as long as she shops the sales. I ran into Savers today and it was highway robbery for what they were charging for visibly used kids crap. Meanwhile you can get kids stuff for $1-$2 at ON and $2-3 at Target if you dig through the sales rack.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and so sick of the delusion of some of the older posters on here. "Spend 10k on a car! Drop the 5k nanny! Your house costs way too much!"

It is 2023. Housing and childcare costs are out of control. The average cost of a new car in America is over $48,000. My generation has been crippled by out of control student loans and multiple financial crises, not to mention being forced to parent young children during a global pandemic. Yes, OP has made expensive choices but guess what? This is WHAT THINGS COST in an expensive metro area in 2023.

Eh, I'm the same age as you, but OP is spending a bit much overall. They are living a CCMD lifestyle on a Brookland or Takoma budget. We have the same salary and mortgage, but we don't pay for PK3/4 and have just one car since we live near public transit. CCMD would be fine for OP if one was big law. And no, half a mil of student debt is super atypical. Most of us has more like 20-30k in student debt. Super easy to manage. We just weren't going out buying 48k+ luxury SUVs in school. Hell a brand new toyota corolla is 21k.

Not OP, but I don’t understand this. What student has $60-70K each year to pay private school tuition? Who graduates with 20-30K of student debt after 7-8 years of college and grad school? I’m a lawyer myself and have many, many, friends who went fed just to get their crippling loans forgiven after 10 years. And please don’t start with “should’ve gone to public school.” Anyone who works in Law knows Big Law firms only hire from top private law schools. Who knows what the circumstances were around that debt, but it doesn’t surprise me at all that 2 people had $500K student debt.

If one is "smart enough to be a lawyer" and go to a private law school in order to go into Big Law, then one should be smart enough to stay in big law until they pay off the loans. Me personally, I wouldn't have kids until I had paid off most of the loans and found a job that I could do while managing a family---not that difficult to realize that big law and being a very involved parent do not easily mix (I suspect the big law is the woman and she decided she wanted a more relaxed lifestyle with kids).

If you choose to take on that debt then you need a good plan to pay it off, and that means working in big law until you do ideally. It may mean putting off having kids for another 2-3 years. Whatever it means, you should have a plan, and their plan was not very good on many levels/choices financially

+1

If you turn down a public law school and/or a lower-tier private law school with merit aid for an expensive private law school for which you incur crippling debt because "(a)nyone who works in Law knows Big Law firms only hire from top private law schools," and then you get the Big Law job you sought to get, then it's on you to follow through and keep that job for as long as you need to in order to pay off the debt and get your life in order.

I cannot imagine agreeing to put on those golden handcuffs before even getting the law degree (and without knowing in advance whether I'd have the necessary stellar credentials to get the Big Law job) - but hey, everyone's dreams are different. To me, that dream sounds like a nightmare.

-Silver Spring PP who went to the Hyundai of law schools, graduated with $20K in debt, and leads a happy life

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You keep the cars until they run into the ground, after they are paid off.

If you have taste that is this expensive OP, I would wonder if a lot of things you are buying are also fairly expensive. Iphones instead of cheaper Androids? Premium streaming services? An expensive phone plan? Brand new clothes for the kids instead of used?

You can't do much about the house or the cars at this point, except sell them, which may not be a great idea. The other plan would be to cut back on all other expenses until the children are out of daycare and in public school.

Pfft on the clothing thing. She can buy new at Old Navy, Target, etc as long as she shops the sales. I ran into Savers today and it was highway robbery for what they were charging for visibly used kids crap. Meanwhile you can get kids stuff for $1-$2 at ON and $2-3 at Target if you dig through the sales rack.

I get the sense that OP doesn't buy any clothing at Old Navy or Target.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and so sick of the delusion of some of the older posters on here. "Spend 10k on a car! Drop the 5k nanny! Your house costs way too much!"

It is 2023. Housing and childcare costs are out of control. The average cost of a new car in America is over $48,000. My generation has been crippled by out of control student loans and multiple financial crises, not to mention being forced to parent young children during a global pandemic. Yes, OP has made expensive choices but guess what? This is WHAT THINGS COST in an expensive metro area in 2023.

Eh, I'm the same age as you, but OP is spending a bit much overall. They are living a CCMD lifestyle on a Brookland or Takoma budget. We have the same salary and mortgage, but we don't pay for PK3/4 and have just one car since we live near public transit. CCMD would be fine for OP if one was big law. And no, half a mil of student debt is super atypical. Most of us has more like 20-30k in student debt. Super easy to manage. We just weren't going out buying 48k+ luxury SUVs in school. Hell a brand new toyota corolla is 21k.

Not OP, but I don’t understand this. What student has $60-70K each year to pay private school tuition? Who graduates with 20-30K of student debt after 7-8 years of college and grad school? I’m a lawyer myself and have many, many, friends who went fed just to get their crippling loans forgiven after 10 years. And please don’t start with “should’ve gone to public school.” Anyone who works in Law knows Big Law firms only hire from top private law schools. Who knows what the circumstances were around that debt, but it doesn’t surprise me at all that 2 people had $500K student debt.

Why didn't your friends with fancy degrees work in Big Law and pay off their loans that way?

So instead they wound up as feds, working alongside West Virginia U. and Suffolk Law School graduates, but with less disposable income?

Um yeah, that makes complete sense to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:First problem is that you think you are rich, you are middle class and living pay check to paycheck. You need to drop the nanny and cars and live like the middle class with daycare and 15 year old shit cars

Nope, OP is rich.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You keep the cars until they run into the ground, after they are paid off.

If you have taste that is this expensive OP, I would wonder if a lot of things you are buying are also fairly expensive. Iphones instead of cheaper Androids? Premium streaming services? An expensive phone plan? Brand new clothes for the kids instead of used?

You can't do much about the house or the cars at this point, except sell them, which may not be a great idea. The other plan would be to cut back on all other expenses until the children are out of daycare and in public school.

Pfft on the clothing thing. She can buy new at Old Navy, Target, etc as long as she shops the sales. I ran into Savers today and it was highway robbery for what they were charging for visibly used kids crap. Meanwhile you can get kids stuff for $1-$2 at ON and $2-3 at Target if you dig through the sales rack.

I get the sense that OP doesn't buy any clothing at Old Navy or Target.

She should - I barely buy any new clothes for my kids. I trade with neighbors.

[Anonymous]

Similar HHE, similar mortgage. The cars were mistakes but you can only move forward. Try to save enough to pay for your next car cash and to buy one car every five years. Honestly, we pay more for camps, since cheap camps are crap when the kids get older, but it's still less than daycare. I would save as much ages 5-9 because then sleepaway gets expensive. Our kids do travel sports, which is also expensive. I'm hoping it gets better again when kids are in high school before it gets real bad for college.

I would not go back into biglaw if you like the flexibility your life has now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Similar HHE, similar mortgage. The cars were mistakes but you can only move forward. Try to save enough to pay for your next car cash and to buy one car every five years. Honestly, we pay more for camps, since cheap camps are crap when the kids get older, but it's still less than daycare. I would save as much ages 5-9 because then sleepaway gets expensive. Our kids do travel sports, which is also expensive. I'm hoping it gets better again when kids are in high school before it gets real bad for college.

I would not go back into biglaw if you like the flexibility your life has now.

I mean, according to the Big Law Spouses thread, Big Law is easy street and everyone makes $2M. Who knew?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and so sick of the delusion of some of the older posters on here. "Spend 10k on a car! Drop the 5k nanny! Your house costs way too much!"

It is 2023. Housing and childcare costs are out of control. The average cost of a new car in America is over $48,000. My generation has been crippled by out of control student loans and multiple financial crises, not to mention being forced to parent young children during a global pandemic. Yes, OP has made expensive choices but guess what? This is WHAT THINGS COST in an expensive metro area in 2023.

Eh, I'm the same age as you, but OP is spending a bit much overall. They are living a CCMD lifestyle on a Brookland or Takoma budget. We have the same salary and mortgage, but we don't pay for PK3/4 and have just one car since we live near public transit. CCMD would be fine for OP if one was big law. And no, half a mil of student debt is super atypical. Most of us has more like 20-30k in student debt. Super easy to manage. We just weren't going out buying 48k+ luxury SUVs in school. Hell a brand new toyota corolla is 21k.

Not OP, but I don’t understand this. What student has $60-70K each year to pay private school tuition? Who graduates with 20-30K of student debt after 7-8 years of college and grad school? I’m a lawyer myself and have many, many, friends who went fed just to get their crippling loans forgiven after 10 years. And please don’t start with “should’ve gone to public school.” Anyone who works in Law knows Big Law firms only hire from top private law schools. Who knows what the circumstances were around that debt, but it doesn’t surprise me at all that 2 people had $500K student debt.

If one is "smart enough to be a lawyer" and go to a private law school in order to go into Big Law, then one should be smart enough to stay in big law until they pay off the loans. Me personally, I wouldn't have kids until I had paid off most of the loans and found a job that I could do while managing a family---not that difficult to realize that big law and being a very involved parent do not easily mix (I suspect the big law is the woman and she decided she wanted a more relaxed lifestyle with kids).

If you choose to take on that debt then you need a good plan to pay it off, and that means working in big law until you do ideally. It may mean putting off having kids for another 2-3 years. Whatever it means, you should have a plan, and their plan was not very good on many levels/choices financially

To be fair, I think OP paid off the $500k loans with the biglaw savings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm 35 and so sick of the delusion of some of the older posters on here. "Spend 10k on a car! Drop the 5k nanny! Your house costs way too much!"

It is 2023. Housing and childcare costs are out of control. The average cost of a new car in America is over $48,000. My generation has been crippled by out of control student loans and multiple financial crises, not to mention being forced to parent young children during a global pandemic. Yes, OP has made expensive choices but guess what? This is WHAT THINGS COST in an expensive metro area in 2023.

Eh, I'm the same age as you, but OP is spending a bit much overall. They are living a CCMD lifestyle on a Brookland or Takoma budget. We have the same salary and mortgage, but we don't pay for PK3/4 and have just one car since we live near public transit. CCMD would be fine for OP if one was big law. And no, half a mil of student debt is super atypical. Most of us has more like 20-30k in student debt. Super easy to manage. We just weren't going out buying 48k+ luxury SUVs in school. Hell a brand new toyota corolla is 21k.

Not OP, but I don’t understand this. What student has $60-70K each year to pay private school tuition? Who graduates with 20-30K of student debt after 7-8 years of college and grad school? I’m a lawyer myself and have many, many, friends who went fed just to get their crippling loans forgiven after 10 years. And please don’t start with “should’ve gone to public school.” Anyone who works in Law knows Big Law firms only hire from top private law schools. Who knows what the circumstances were around that debt, but it doesn’t surprise me at all that 2 people had $500K student debt.

If one is "smart enough to be a lawyer" and go to a private law school in order to go into Big Law, then one should be smart enough to stay in big law until they pay off the loans. Me personally, I wouldn't have kids until I had paid off most of the loans and found a job that I could do while managing a family---not that difficult to realize that big law and being a very involved parent do not easily mix (I suspect the big law is the woman and she decided she wanted a more relaxed lifestyle with kids).

If you choose to take on that debt then you need a good plan to pay it off, and that means working in big law until you do ideally. It may mean putting off having kids for another 2-3 years. Whatever it means, you should have a plan, and their plan was not very good on many levels/choices financially

To be fair, I think OP paid off the $500k loans with the biglaw savings.

Right, but OP made Big Law choices including their cars (Acuras! while students!), house, neighborhood, childcare.