Is anyone else super triggered by ppl showing off on social media?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I never post on social media because it doesn't interest me. (I also don't scroll through it for the same reason.) That said, I think you ARE jealous. Not that the person is flying in business class. But that the person doesn't mind telling the world. I think you'd actually sort of like to do it. But you're plagued with self-consciousness and self-doubt and can't bring yourself to live the same way. It grinds your gears that they don't experience the self-consciousness you do.

You have it impressively backwards.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There have been experiments done on this. It’s called the ‘hubris hypothesis’ and it is v real

https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/0956797615573516

The abstract nails it. People think when they show off on social media that people will be impressed snd like them more. But instead people find it annoying and like them less. The end.

Mic drop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Interesting post about the decision not to share this type of thing and what is the correct way to deal

https://workingmomwarrior.com/2020/02/23/stop-bragging-so-much-on-social-media/comment-page-1/#comments

Eh, it’s common sense.

Post a pic of your kid wearing the college t-shirt along with, “Julie is heading to Harvard in the fall!”

Heck, you can even post, “Julie earned a full ride to Harvard! Bursting with pride!”

No need to go into the minutiae of travel expenses to a two-day program or the details of books, etc.

Or people can post whatever the hell they want about their own lives/family on their own SM.

Get over yourself.

No one’s stopping them from posting. Their desperation is just being laughed at.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I assume anyone over 30 who does social media bragging grew up “on the other side of the tracks” and finally came into a little money (or scammed PPP). What’s the saying, act like you’ve been there before?

This is my experience. I grew up with $ and DC friends from childhood are all successful. They do not post EVER. New money friends from other places tend to post more. It's a little pathetic, but I am also a snob, so I prob judge more. Just being honest.

Well I'm from Alexandria and I love posting about my trips. I honestly don't care what people think. Most of the time I love posting b/c I am finally at the weight I love. That's honestly why I post more lol. No shame either.

Oh, look. Attention-seeking, thirsty Exhibit A.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I will flip it on you, OP.

I'm actually really excited when I see my friends achieving something or "showing off." If they are happy and living their best life, I'm truly thrilled for them.

Op - I refuse to believe anyone is actually this pure of heart. Are you Bambi?

DP. I feel the same way, and not because I am pure of heart. I am simply a rational person, and I do not believe that everything someone posts is somehow about me, designed to make me feel bad or otherwise aimed at me. When I see someone posting from a business lounge, my first thought is "good for them!"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:As other PPs have said, you are annoyed because their posting breaks rules of etiquette that you have been taught are unimpeachable. What’s more, there are no “consequences” for their misbehavior and they go right on posting. You are irked that the rules that apply to you don’t apply to them.

I get it OP. I find some SM posts annoying (but not triggering). The answer is that some people are annoying! It’s just part of life, dealing with people who conform to different norms and value systems than you do.

This is so true and so helpful.
But I do also think ppl sometimes use it to purposely trigger feelings in others that are not ‘right’ to trigger.
There’s no need to ‘hide’ your life but no need to do things that add no value to your audience other than to make them envious.
Example:
Photo or slideshow of kids on beach with parents (not multiple posts) - ‘we found the sun, kids are having a blast’. Great!
Photo or slideshow or multiple posts of facilities at resort or family but tagging ridiculous expensive resort or gratuitous photos intended just to highlight expensiveness of activity - not ok.

Same goes with non money stuff. It’s so easy to just ask yourself - am I showing off?

Not saying this in a mean way at all, but you are imputing a mindset to them that they may not have. You may be conditioned to ask yourself “am I showing off?” before posting because you were taught that showing off is gauche, in poor taste, etc. What I’m saying is that other people either don’t have those same values. Maybe they are just too clueless to put themselves in the state of mind of someone like you. Either way, you don’t have to assume malicious intent. You have the right to be annoyed, but you may be less annoyed if you don’t assume that they think the same way you do.

Because it is. But of course self-centered, self-involved people “don’t see it that way.”

Sure. And my point is that is worth probably an eyeroll but not worth much more than that. Unless you are the self-appointed manners police and find it so irksome that you are constantly triggered by social transgressions. At this point, you’re or two too late to burn these people at the stake or tar and feather them so you’re just going to have to mute them or deal with your own issues.

[Anonymous]

*a century or two too late

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

How's your therapy bill? Maybe that's why you can't afford business class.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never post on social media because it doesn't interest me. (I also don't scroll through it for the same reason.) That said, I think you ARE jealous. Not that the person is flying in business class. But that the person doesn't mind telling the world. I think you'd actually sort of like to do it. But you're plagued with self-consciousness and self-doubt and can't bring yourself to live the same way. It grinds your gears that they don't experience the self-consciousness you do.

You have it impressively backwards.

You think that people who post on social media are annoyed that people who don’t are self-conscious? Uh I don’t think so?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I never post on social media because it doesn't interest me. (I also don't scroll through it for the same reason.) That said, I think you ARE jealous. Not that the person is flying in business class. But that the person doesn't mind telling the world. I think you'd actually sort of like to do it. But you're plagued with self-consciousness and self-doubt and can't bring yourself to live the same way. It grinds your gears that they don't experience the self-consciousness you do.

You have it impressively backwards.

Can you explain?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I assume anyone over 30 who does social media bragging grew up “on the other side of the tracks” and finally came into a little money (or scammed PPP). What’s the saying, act like you’ve been there before?

This is my experience. I grew up with $ and DC friends from childhood are all successful. They do not post EVER. New money friends from other places tend to post more. It's a little pathetic, but I am also a snob, so I prob judge more. Just being honest.

Well I'm from Alexandria and I love posting about my trips. I honestly don't care what people think. Most of the time I love posting b/c I am finally at the weight I love. That's honestly why I post more lol. No shame either.

Oh, look. Attention-seeking, thirsty Exhibit A.

Oh, look, Judgey McAsol, Exhibit A.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

How's your therapy bill? Maybe that's why you can't afford business class.

No one on here said they can’t afford business class.
Many here said they can but would never post about traveling business class. Literally as tacky as posting a photo of you making it rain with actual cash. I’m serious. It’s that obvious

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I assume anyone over 30 who does social media bragging grew up “on the other side of the tracks” and finally came into a little money (or scammed PPP). What’s the saying, act like you’ve been there before?

This is my experience. I grew up with $ and DC friends from childhood are all successful. They do not post EVER. New money friends from other places tend to post more. It's a little pathetic, but I am also a snob, so I prob judge more. Just being honest.

Well I'm from Alexandria and I love posting about my trips. I honestly don't care what people think. Most of the time I love posting b/c I am finally at the weight I love. That's honestly why I post more lol. No shame either.

Oh, look. Attention-seeking, thirsty Exhibit A.

Oh, look, Judgey McAsol, Exhibit A.

You cannot possibly be so dumb that you don’t see the hypocrisy in your own post

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

How's your therapy bill? Maybe that's why you can't afford business class.

No one on here said they can’t afford business class.
Many here said they can but would never post about traveling business class. Literally as tacky as posting a photo of you making it rain with actual cash. I’m serious. It’s that obvious

+1

[Anonymous]

It's certainly the poster themselves who can be obnoxious, not the post alone.

If Mr. Beast posted a video of his experience on a plane in business class, nobody would think negatively about it.

But here, it's likely a narcissist who posted it, and that's what's so irritating. The post is just another reminder of them - their essence.