Is anyone else super triggered by ppl showing off on social media?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

See I think this is the moist that most closely gets to the heart of the issue.

I think it’s an issue bc OP can see that the world of marketing changed and what works in terms of marketing right now can be done for companies through regular people. And the truth is making decent content for social media takes a bit if savvy and those who do it well actually know how to “market” so to speak their content.

IMO the OP is missing out. Maybe right now she doesn’t understand social media to the level she feels she could be successful but just like others instead of criticizing she should start observing and then emulating those who get the best reaction to their content.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I assume anyone over 30 who does social media bragging grew up “on the other side of the tracks” and finally came into a little money (or scammed PPP). What’s the saying, act like you’ve been there before?

This is my experience. I grew up with $ and DC friends from childhood are all successful. They do not post EVER. New money friends from other places tend to post more. It's a little pathetic, but I am also a snob, so I prob judge more. Just being honest.

DC is a weird place full of strivers with issues warranting therapy. Insecure despite material success. Trying to blend in rather than make an impact.

Lol agreed. But not a lot of cheese balls posting cringey pics trying to show off their vacations. At least not people who grew up in the 80s/90s. And I mean DC, not the suburbanites. Cheese balls abound there.

I know Gen X women raised in DC (Visi, Sidwell, Cathedral) who post on social media.

Op - gen x are the worst offenders. I am on the cusp of x and m.
Gen z are the least bc cringe to them is like kryptonite and a lot of this would fall into that category.
Maybe I just have gen z mentality even though I am very ancient

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:I assume anyone over 30 who does social media bragging grew up “on the other side of the tracks” and finally came into a little money (or scammed PPP). What’s the saying, act like you’ve been there before?

This is my experience. I grew up with $ and DC friends from childhood are all successful. They do not post EVER. New money friends from other places tend to post more. It's a little pathetic, but I am also a snob, so I prob judge more. Just being honest.

DC is a weird place full of strivers with issues warranting therapy. Insecure despite material success. Trying to blend in rather than make an impact.

Lol agreed. But not a lot of cheese balls posting cringey pics trying to show off their vacations. At least not people who grew up in the 80s/90s. And I mean DC, not the suburbanites. Cheese balls abound there.

I know Gen X women raised in DC (Visi, Sidwell, Cathedral) who post on social media.

Op - gen x are the worst offenders. I am on the cusp of x and m.
Gen z are the least bc cringe to them is like kryptonite and a lot of this would fall into that category.
Maybe I just have gen z mentality even though I am very ancient

I have no idea why people keep saying gen x is better about social media. They are all over snap and ticktock in the way gen x is on FB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

See I think this is the moist that most closely gets to the heart of the issue.

I think it’s an issue bc OP can see that the world of marketing changed and what works in terms of marketing right now can be done for companies through regular people. And the truth is making decent content for social media takes a bit if savvy and those who do it well actually know how to “market” so to speak their content.

IMO the OP is missing out. Maybe right now she doesn’t understand social media to the level she feels she could be successful but just like others instead of criticizing she should start observing and then emulating those who get the best reaction to their content.

Op - I am very very good at social media and paid extremely well to counsel on it.
Humble bragging and overt bragging posts rarely get a lot of positive engagement among acquaintances - but as others have pointed out, a lot of aspirational influencer content will. I think people have very different feelings to Kim kardashian posting from her jet to some dude you know. There’s a level of fame and brand that is based off of such content. Clive from summit nj’s brand is not grounded in his bling lifestyle

[Anonymous]

I mean, I've posted pictures of myself in first lounges as a "OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY LET ME IN" thing. I have very low self-confidence and live a frugal life, but business travel allows me experiences like that, and I'm always kind of in awe.

Sorry that offends you, and obviously you won't think it justifies a picture, but I'd hope you would see it as an explanation.

[Anonymous]

I judge the duck lips and the trying to be sexy with too much makeup on. Even if you apply makeup well you still look stupid. To the men, just stop.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean, I've posted pictures of myself in first lounges as a "OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY LET ME IN" thing. I have very low self-confidence and live a frugal life, but business travel allows me experiences like that, and I'm always kind of in awe.

Sorry that offends you, and obviously you won't think it justifies a picture, but I'd hope you would see it as an explanation.

Op - I would love this and be happy for you!
That’s exactly the point. If you post a great experience and give actual, authentic, real context then people will always celebrate that

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I mean, I've posted pictures of myself in first lounges as a "OMG I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY LET ME IN" thing. I have very low self-confidence and live a frugal life, but business travel allows me experiences like that, and I'm always kind of in awe.

Sorry that offends you, and obviously you won't think it justifies a picture, but I'd hope you would see it as an explanation.

Not OP.

If I saw this on social media, the first time I’d like it and be happy for you. The second time I’d like it and think “oooh, lucky.” The third time is kind of roll my eyes. The fourth time I’d mute you.

You can’t just constantly post “omg I can’t believe I’m so lucky!” over and over and expect people to be right there with you. However low your self esteem is, eventually people will just think “we get it, you’re very lucky and you CAN’T BELIEVE IT. Whatever.”

[Anonymous]

It’s cringeworthy and it shows the poster’s insecurity, but if it’s bothering you enough to negativity affect your life, either get off social media or block the repeat offenders.

[Anonymous]

No. I am not on social media so you can keep showing off and I won't know about it. I am taking everyone on face value IRL.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why do you care what other people do? They found something that makes them happy. You go find something tha t makes you happy.

Seriously.

I sure as hell posted my first time in the United lounge, I was excited! It’s my page, so I’ll post what I want. 😌😌

You aren’t forced to look at it.

Ew.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not showing off. I'm just living my life ok?

If only you could “just love your life” without splashing it all over social media to beg for attention. Oh wait. Good news!

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:As other PPs have said, you are annoyed because their posting breaks rules of etiquette that you have been taught are unimpeachable. What’s more, there are no “consequences” for their misbehavior and they go right on posting. You are irked that the rules that apply to you don’t apply to them.

I get it OP. I find some SM posts annoying (but not triggering). The answer is that some people are annoying! It’s just part of life, dealing with people who conform to different norms and value systems than you do.

This is so true and so helpful.
But I do also think ppl sometimes use it to purposely trigger feelings in others that are not ‘right’ to trigger.
There’s no need to ‘hide’ your life but no need to do things that add no value to your audience other than to make them envious.
Example:
Photo or slideshow of kids on beach with parents (not multiple posts) - ‘we found the sun, kids are having a blast’. Great!
Photo or slideshow or multiple posts of facilities at resort or family but tagging ridiculous expensive resort or gratuitous photos intended just to highlight expensiveness of activity - not ok.

Same goes with non money stuff. It’s so easy to just ask yourself - am I showing off?

Not saying this in a mean way at all, but you are imputing a mindset to them that they may not have. You may be conditioned to ask yourself “am I showing off?” before posting because you were taught that showing off is gauche, in poor taste, etc. What I’m saying is that other people either don’t have those same values. Maybe they are just too clueless to put themselves in the state of mind of someone like you. Either way, you don’t have to assume malicious intent. You have the right to be annoyed, but you may be less annoyed if you don’t assume that they think the same way you do.

Because it is. But of course self-centered, self-involved people “don’t see it that way.”

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:Honestly, it kind of sounds like you're annoyed that others are getting attention for things you do too. Jealousy isn't the right word, maybe validation? Kind of like how when someone has an achievement and gets attention and praise for it so someone butts in with their achievement so they can get praise too. But since you don't post you don't get the attention and that's really what bothers you

This is so untrue. I fly private, and stay in hotel penthouses, and this triggers me when I see it. Showing off is showing off, and it’s awful behavior. If there was no social media, you would not be posting anything and living in the moment and enjoying your memory.

You’re making the assumption that someone is posting to brag when in reality they might not be. You are assigning malicious intent. This is all based on your own morals, values and rigid social media code that you have developed.

And yet you are going out of your way to tell us that you fly private and stay in penthouses.

I think you definitely believe folks shouldn’t be posting certain things on social media and it’s likely because you don’t want them to be on your level. You subconsciously want to be better than others, and it’s obvious you find ways to judge people in order to do that.

Lastly: if you are in therapy, you have issues. Good for you for addressing them in therapy. But some things really shouldn’t require therapy. Sometimes you just need to realize that being easily triggered by silly things is your issue instead of digging in to find support in judging others and making yourself feel better.

Comparable to implicit bias: if you feel bad thoughts creeping up, remind yourself it’s not cool and try to shift your mindset. Don’t feed into it.

In short: try not to be a miserable jerk. Be better.

Op - this post wasn’t me. But thanks!

But I’ve read your other posts, and my advice applies to you. Seriously.

Honestly from your post I think you are kind of a judgemental and miserable jerk.
I at least have the decency to question my judgement and get therapy. You don’t

How old are you? Seriously.

Being triggered by social media indicates *you* have an issue. Ditto for being in therapy. Happy, resilient people aren’t triggered by social media or need therapy.

Again, I applaud your effort to seek help, but at some point you might want to evaluate if therapy is helping. Sometimes it’s actually better to handle yourself rather than seek an audience and validation through a paid therapist. I know several people who wasted years/decades with a therapist when what they really needed to do was stop being so self-centered and fixated on their own thoughts and feelings.

The only reason I’m engaging with you is because you posted here. I don’t judge people irl. If I catch myself going there, I recognize it internally and pivot. Again: it’s a skill people should develop.

Oh dear. Your ignorance is showing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You are triggered by it because you’re not at peace with yourself or your choices. Emotionally secure, happy people who are at peace with their choices don’t get jealous or superb annoyed by stuff like this. At most, they think it is cringeworthy and either unfollow or shrug it off as not worth thinking about.

Emotionally secure, happy people aren’t making repeated attention-seeking posts on social media about first class seats or lounges, expensive restaurants, etc, etc. And yes, no matter how much you protest, that is indeed what they are, and it’s pathetic.