Why so much disgust felt towards men for dating significantly younger?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why so much disgust and judgement? Isn't there also a significant number of women, especially in their 20's, who don't want to date men their age and prefer older guys? It takes two consenting adults for these relationships to happen.

The prospect of becoming a genetic dead-end, dying alone, and/or settling with someone you don't truly love is terrifying. That's why I tell all of my daughters' friends to marry young and choose wisely. You don't want to be on the wrong side of 30 looking for a husband nor do you want to be in your 30s or 40s and back on the market after a divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why so much disgust and judgement? Isn't there also a significant number of women, especially in their 20's, who don't want to date men their age and prefer older guys? It takes two consenting adults for these relationships to happen.

In my experience, no, not a significant number of normal, well-adjusted 20 somethings. I’m so judgmental of these age gaps because of what I remember of being in my 20s (which was not that long ago). Almost all the girls I know wouldn’t have dreamed of dating a guy a decade older and the ones that did, well, for us it wasn’t a mystery why.

This. Women in their 20's want to date near their own age. The few who don't are in it for the money.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Everyone keeps saying it’s about power. Hogwash. I’m a man. I can tell you it’s about appearance. Some men are simply absorbed with physical beauty and they think of that only as a tight body, no stretch marks or imperfections, etc. Some things really are occams razor simple folks.

When I was 23 I dated a man almost 15 years older because he did want that perfect physical beauty. I was a size 2, zero stretch marks, no lines on my face, and a solid 9.

And that still wasn’t enough for him. He constantly pined after celebrities and porn stars, played porn constantly, and compared me to celebrities. Had little interest in sex with me because I wasn’t airbrushed perfection.

There’s something really wrong with people who want a physically perfect partner. We all have flaws…especially 40+ men (it’s true, guys, you sag and your hair is either graying or balding, and you don’t get as hard as a 25 year old). Well adjusted people understand this. Anyone with unrealistic expectations probably needs to lay off the porn.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

Guess what, you aren’t holding up well either.

I really am although I know you wish that truth on me. Hence why I have no problem dating younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

I’m in my early 40s and single and I would NEVER date anywhere close to 62.

It's OK, there are still plenty who are willing. I manage to find them. Late 40s to mid-50s are more likely than early 40s but I've dated even younger than that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

What are you looking for at this stage in life? Just some random, short-lived fun, or a long-term relationship?

LTR eventually with the right partner but not looking to get married again. I have that for the past few years now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

Guess what, you aren’t holding up well either.

Men take note: on this forum, the go-to line of argument for women is the ad hominem attack.

DP. You get that pp was saying the same thing back to the poster that the poster said about women? If it’s offensive when a woman says it about a man, then it’s also offensive when a man says it about women, right?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

What are you looking for at this stage in life? Just some random, short-lived fun, or a long-term relationship?

LTR eventually with the right partner but not looking to get married again. I have that for the past few years now.

You’re in a long-term relationship but are still dating women in their 40s to early 50s?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Why so much disgust and judgement? Isn't there also a significant number of women, especially in their 20's, who don't want to date men their age and prefer older guys? It takes two consenting adults for these relationships to happen.

The prospect of becoming a genetic dead-end, dying alone, and/or settling with someone you don't truly love is terrifying. That's why I tell all of my daughters' friends to marry young and choose wisely. You don't want to be on the wrong side of 30 looking for a husband nor do you want to be in your 30s or 40s and back on the market after a divorce.

These two directions can't always exist at the same time. Experience does sharpen instincts a little. Also, divorce could happen when marrying young. People are still maturing into who they are. Especially in these days.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

Guess what, you aren’t holding up well either.

Men take note: on this forum, the go-to line of argument for women is the ad hominem attack.

DP. The comment regarding you aren't holding up either was after a man mentioned older women not holding up well in age. I guess it is the same both ways huh. I mean lets be honest once both sexes hit 60+ they certainly look their age, they look old, no matter how deluded they are.

Tell that to Robert Redford and Warren Beatty!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

What are you looking for at this stage in life? Just some random, short-lived fun, or a long-term relationship?

LTR eventually with the right partner but not looking to get married again. I have that for the past few years now.

You’re in a long-term relationship but are still dating women in their 40s to early 50s?

No. I was describing the past 15 years or so of dating. Current relationship is 14 years younger.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

Guess what, you aren’t holding up well either.

Men take note: on this forum, the go-to line of argument for women is the ad hominem attack.

DP. The comment regarding you aren't holding up either was after a man mentioned older women not holding up well in age. I guess it is the same both ways huh. I mean lets be honest once both sexes hit 60+ they certainly look their age, they look old, no matter how deluded they are.

Tell that to Robert Redford and Warren Beatty!

They both look their ages. They look good for their ages, but neither is passing for 20 years younger than they are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

What are you looking for at this stage in life? Just some random, short-lived fun, or a long-term relationship?

LTR eventually with the right partner but not looking to get married again. I have that for the past few years now.

You’re in a long-term relationship but are still dating women in their 40s to early 50s?

No. I was describing the past 15 years or so of dating. Current relationship is 14 years younger.

Ah, the story changes. Someone is telling porkie pies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

Guess what, you aren’t holding up well either.

Men take note: on this forum, the go-to line of argument for women is the ad hominem attack.

DP. The comment regarding you aren't holding up either was after a man mentioned older women not holding up well in age. I guess it is the same both ways huh. I mean lets be honest once both sexes hit 60+ they certainly look their age, they look old, no matter how deluded they are.

I made both Comme ts. I'm very fortunate to not look anywhere near my age along with pretty good health, all my teeth and most of my hair. Barely a single wrinkle in my face. It's all genetics, nothing I've really done except avoid the sun and eat healthy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just turned 62, widowed past 15 years. and still dating women in their 40s to early 50s. I get the cringe factor of guys still dating women in their 20s but, at my age, a decade younger with children who have left home just seems perfect. The women my age or even within 5 years of my age that I see on dating sites, or who pursue me just haven't held up very well at all, with some rare exceptions.

Guess what, you aren’t holding up well either.

Men take note: on this forum, the go-to line of argument for women is the ad hominem attack.

DP. The comment regarding you aren't holding up either was after a man mentioned older women not holding up well in age. I guess it is the same both ways huh. I mean lets be honest once both sexes hit 60+ they certainly look their age, they look old, no matter how deluded they are.

I made both Comme ts. I'm very fortunate to not look anywhere near my age along with pretty good health, all my teeth and most of my hair. Barely a single wrinkle in my face. It's all genetics, nothing I've really done except avoid the sun and eat healthy.

DP. None of us are good judges of how old we look to others - we always think we look younger than we do. A few women saying you look younger for their own purposes doesn’t change that.