Primping for DH- is this abnormal??

[Anonymous]

I work outside the home so I’m always decently attired and I wear light makeup etc. When I get home I do like to dress comfortable and casual, but not sweats or grubby clothes. If I’m hoping for sex I will wear something a little more revealing as that usually sends the right message to my husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I work outside the home so I’m always decently attired and I wear light makeup etc. When I get home I do like to dress comfortable and casual, but not sweats or grubby clothes. If I’m hoping for sex I will wear something a little more revealing as that usually sends the right message to my husband.

Men are visual. Putting some effort into looking good and throwing something on that’s more revealing than usual is a turn on. I don’t know a man who wouldn’t be into his wife trying to look good for him.

[Anonymous]

I don't have an issue with wanting to look cute and put together for your DH, but the booty shorts/crop top thing is what makes this sound a little desperate/trollish.

Do you still plan on doing this when you're 50-60+ years old?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Nothing wrong with it at all. What's wrong with wanting to be fresh/sexy/cute for your husband? I also don't see anything wrong with the people who don't do it.

Listen, at the end of the day it's about what keeps your marriage a happy and healthy marriage. If a fresh up works for you, good for you for figuring that out.

OP. Yes, it is something that makes me feel attractive. I know some pps did take issue with the fact that I like to be “checked out” by DH but that is something that keeps our marriage sexy and a little flirty. He also appreciates when I tell him he looks hot in his suit.

I do not think there is anything wrong with not doing this. In every marriage spouses have different ways of showing attraction and affection. In no way do I feel any woman should feel pressured to do this.

Don't you have 3 little kids to take care of? How do you find time to do that and be on DCUM all day defending your hot pants.

[Anonymous]

Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I think it’s sweet that you care to do this.

[Anonymous]

Yes, it's strange. But you depend on him for $$ so...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:51 year old man here, married 22 years; I think it's hot and you should keep doing it. Since Covid hit and we've both been working from home my wife gets still makes sure she looks professional with a touch of makeup, earrings, etc. While I've told her it's not the norm and we all wear comfy clothes, she says it makes her feel better. I've come to love it, because I get to see her looking great and we joke about me checking her out during the day.

My point is that there's nothing wrong with wearing clothes that make you look hot and attractive to your partner. If you're into it and he's into it (lucky guy), keep at it.

And what do you do to look sexy for her?

[Anonymous]

OP how old are you? You sound 25.

[Anonymous]

It's insane to me that there are people who think this is bad. Probably the same ones who complain about how the DH is always sitting around in ugly sweats all the time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My spouse and I are retired and spend most days together, but at the end of the day, we both change into nicer clothes to spend the evening together. We like to look nice for each other. And we have a great sex life, too, so I guess it works out for us.

Extra laundry….

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s not weird, OP. I would want to look respectable for any non-child who I’m going to see. Of course, you don’t NEED to do it, but it’s nice to have someone you want to come home to you, and someone who’s happy to be there.

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Since when are short shorts and cropped tanks “respectable”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s not weird, OP. I would want to look respectable for any non-child who I’m going to see. Of course, you don’t NEED to do it, but it’s nice to have someone you want to come home to you, and someone who’s happy to be there.

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Since when are short shorts and cropped tanks “respectable”?

OP described a typical outfit in the thread and it’s hardly scandalous. Those of you getting hung up on the idea of leggings or a cropped top sound like prudes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't have an issue with wanting to look cute and put together for your DH, but the booty shorts/crop top thing is what makes this sound a little desperate/trollish.

Do you still plan on doing this when you're 50-60+ years old?

Exactly. Find something else of value to add. I get cleaned up and cute but I’m not trying to look like I’m on spring break. And yes, it’s cheesy to wear a sports bra and leggings to look oooo sexxxy (wasn’t that your example?). you’re not in college. Go shopping. Buy some normal clothes. Get some actual lingerie. Get some normal day time clothes. Who buys short shorts and low cut tanks for everyday house wear? Are you some kind of stunted sorority girl?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:How old are the kids? I do think it’s weird that you get skimpy presumably before dinner. Do you have girls?

OP here- I think people may be getting the wrong impression from what I wrote initially. I like to change into comfortable but flattering loungewear at the end of the day. I would not characterize what I’m wearing as skimpy.. What I wear is similar to what women might wear to a yoga class or workout. Like another poster said, I don’t think leggings and a longline bra top is inappropriate to wear at home, personally.

Kids are 4, 2, and 6 months. I don’t think they are offended by wearing leggings as pants at home.

You are on dcum, OP. People here are scandalized by leggings. I also choose clothing that is perfectly appropriate but that DH might find sexy. Fine if you want to wear a shapeless sack but your kids won’t be scarred by you changing out of sweatpants and an oversized t shirt once in a while.

Yes the people here would not dress up for a first date or a job interview. They would blame the patriarchy but really it’s on them.

OP's new version - "I have ratty loungewear that I wear with the kids and flattering loungewear that I put on before DH gets home" is a lot more reasonable than the OP, where she does her hair, makeup, and puts on short shorts and a crop top or deep V-neck to greet him at the door. What she's saying now is a slightly vain woman who wants to keep the sexy SAHM illusion up; what she said in the OP was so porny and ridiculous that a dozen people assumed she was a man working on a screenplay.

OP here. I do refresh makeup and brush my hair (this usually takes as little as 2min) and change into something comfortable but figure flattering. I updated the clothing bit with more details because it sounded like people were picturing my clothing as a negligee or bootie shorts and a bra. This is never what I intended to communicate. In listing shorts, v neck, cropped tank etc I meant that I usually wear one of these pieces: ie a cropped top with high waisted leggings or short shorts that show off leg (not butt) with a tshirt.

I guess I do, in part, like to look like a sexy sahm to my DH. It makes me feel confident and sexually appealing.

Here. I wear the same stuff around the house. PPs are making a mountain out of a molehill.

[Anonymous]

OP, have you considered wearing tastefully tailored but loose clothing that shrouds your body entirely? This and fine fabrics. Men love that.