Primping for DH- is this abnormal??

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a sahm. I obviously get ready in the morning (simple hair, light makeup, casual clothes) but I also do a little refresh before DH comes home. Usually this is just brushing hair, touching up makeup and maybe changing into something a little more comfortable but more revealing than my daytime outfit (short shorts, cropped tank, low cut v neck etc). I do not feel any pressure or expectations from DH regarding any of this.

Anyway, I was talking to a few friends and it was brought up that I did this. They pressed for details and thought the whole thing was totally weird and silly, especially considering that DH sees me au natural at night and in the morning. I didn’t think this was a strange thing to do but my friends completely roasted me. What do you think dcum? Do you do this? Is this strange?

Help, DH means? Thanks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a sahm. I obviously get ready in the morning (simple hair, light makeup, casual clothes) but I also do a little refresh before DH comes home. Usually this is just brushing hair, touching up makeup and maybe changing into something a little more comfortable but more revealing than my daytime outfit (short shorts, cropped tank, low cut v neck etc). I do not feel any pressure or expectations from DH regarding any of this.

Anyway, I was talking to a few friends and it was brought up that I did this. They pressed for details and thought the whole thing was totally weird and silly, especially considering that DH sees me au natural at night and in the morning. I didn’t think this was a strange thing to do but my friends completely roasted me. What do you think dcum? Do you do this? Is this strange?

Help, DH means? Thanks.

Dear/darling husband. Sounds like a term of affection typed out but on dcum it’s just shorthand for husband.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a sahm. I obviously get ready in the morning (simple hair, light makeup, casual clothes) but I also do a little refresh before DH comes home. Usually this is just brushing hair, touching up makeup and maybe changing into something a little more comfortable but more revealing than my daytime outfit (short shorts, cropped tank, low cut v neck etc). I do not feel any pressure or expectations from DH regarding any of this.

Anyway, I was talking to a few friends and it was brought up that I did this. They pressed for details and thought the whole thing was totally weird and silly, especially considering that DH sees me au natural at night and in the morning. I didn’t think this was a strange thing to do but my friends completely roasted me. What do you think dcum? Do you do this? Is this strange?

Do you take his briefcase and hang up his hat for him?

So what if she did? My DH serves me and I serve him - and we are happy together and have so much fun. What is wrong with wanting to please your spouse and make them happy?

:notices all the threads on miserable DCUM marriages:

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I posted several pages back and again am surprised at how many people are calling what you do (OP) old-fashioned or anti-feminist.

Going to work? Make sure you look put together.
Going out to dinner? Make sure you look put together.
Meeting girlfriends? Going shopping? Going to a show? Make sure you look put together.

Seeing your husband? DRESS HOWEVER YOU WANT AND DONT CARE ABOUT HOW YOU LOOK if you do you’re subservient stop dressing for the male gaze

Lmao. This site.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a sahm. I obviously get ready in the morning (simple hair, light makeup, casual clothes) but I also do a little refresh before DH comes home. Usually this is just brushing hair, touching up makeup and maybe changing into something a little more comfortable but more revealing than my daytime outfit (short shorts, cropped tank, low cut v neck etc). I do not feel any pressure or expectations from DH regarding any of this.

Anyway, I was talking to a few friends and it was brought up that I did this. They pressed for details and thought the whole thing was totally weird and silly, especially considering that DH sees me au natural at night and in the morning. I didn’t think this was a strange thing to do but my friends completely roasted me. What do you think dcum? Do you do this? Is this strange?

yes, to me it is strange but, hey if your happy and he likes it than I am not going to judge.

[Anonymous]

g.

Here. I wear the same stuff around the house. PPs are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Yeah, the posters here are showing their age. My 30 yo coworkers all wear leggings or bike shorts and cropped Ts all over the city, regardless of their size. It is the DC uniform.

[Anonymous]

OP, I think it's uncommon, but I wouldn't call it abnormal. I think it's sweet that you want to look nice for your husband, even though for me, it wouldn't even occur to me to do that. I barely do that to show up to the bus stop! But I do it if I know if I'm going to be out in public.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:g.

Here. I wear the same stuff around the house. PPs are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Yeah, the posters here are showing their age. My 30 yo coworkers all wear leggings or bike shorts and cropped Ts all over the city, regardless of their size. It is the DC uniform.

I agree with this. I was surprised some people felt so dramatically about the clothes OP described. I’m 30 and often wear cropped tops and even (gasp!) bike shorts at home and in front of my toddler.

Anyway, I do think important for spouses to make an effort at home. It keeps the marriage hot!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:g.

Here. I wear the same stuff around the house. PPs are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Yeah, the posters here are showing their age. My 30 yo coworkers all wear leggings or bike shorts and cropped Ts all over the city, regardless of their size. It is the DC uniform.

I agree with this. I was surprised some people felt so dramatically about the clothes OP described. I’m 30 and often wear cropped tops and even (gasp!) bike shorts at home and in front of my toddler.

Anyway, I do think important for spouses to make an effort at home. It keeps the marriage hot!



Cool, because you will never be 35! Ew! Also, if you look gross in your bike shorts, which 98% of people do, it’s not in fact hot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:g.

Here. I wear the same stuff around the house. PPs are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Yeah, the posters here are showing their age. My 30 yo coworkers all wear leggings or bike shorts and cropped Ts all over the city, regardless of their size. It is the DC uniform.

I agree with this. I was surprised some people felt so dramatically about the clothes OP described. I’m 30 and often wear cropped tops and even (gasp!) bike shorts at home and in front of my toddler.

Anyway, I do think important for spouses to make an effort at home. It keeps the marriage hot!



Cool, because you will never be 35! Ew! Also, if you look gross in your bike shorts, which 98% of people do, it’s not in fact hot.

Pp, I don’t get this. When we are 35 I hope we are still making an effort. And you are an insecure jerk projecting your own body issues onto the people around you. I look great. And even if I didn’t meet your standards of bike short appropriate body, what’s it to you if DH and I both like what I wear at home?Ladies, stop hating yourselves and don’t be afraid to wear something sexy in front of your DH. Too many women are out there freaking out because they don’t have washboard abs and this is a killer for your sex life. Wear that lingerie, leave those lights on. Take some joy in your sexuality!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:g.

Here. I wear the same stuff around the house. PPs are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Yeah, the posters here are showing their age. My 30 yo coworkers all wear leggings or bike shorts and cropped Ts all over the city, regardless of their size. It is the DC uniform.

I agree with this. I was surprised some people felt so dramatically about the clothes OP described. I’m 30 and often wear cropped tops and even (gasp!) bike shorts at home and in front of my toddler.

Anyway, I do think important for spouses to make an effort at home. It keeps the marriage hot!

Cool, because you will never be 35! Ew! Also, if you look gross in your bike shorts, which 98% of people do, it’s not in fact hot.

Pp, I don’t get this. When we are 35 I hope we are still making an effort. And you are an insecure jerk projecting your own body issues onto the people around you. I look great. And even if I didn’t meet your standards of bike short appropriate body, what’s it to you if DH and I both like what I wear at home?Ladies, stop hating yourselves and don’t be afraid to wear something sexy in front of your DH. Too many women are out there freaking out because they don’t have washboard abs and this is a killer for your sex life. Wear that lingerie, leave those lights on. Take some joy in your sexuality!

There is a whole group of anorexic miserable women in sexless marriages who will never understand what you are talking about. Their DH’s AP’s get it, though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:g.

Here. I wear the same stuff around the house. PPs are making a mountain out of a molehill.

Yeah, the posters here are showing their age. My 30 yo coworkers all wear leggings or bike shorts and cropped Ts all over the city, regardless of their size. It is the DC uniform.

I agree with this. I was surprised some people felt so dramatically about the clothes OP described. I’m 30 and often wear cropped tops and even (gasp!) bike shorts at home and in front of my toddler.

Anyway, I do think important for spouses to make an effort at home. It keeps the marriage hot!

Cool, because you will never be 35! Ew! Also, if you look gross in your bike shorts, which 98% of people do, it’s not in fact hot.

Pp, I don’t get this. When we are 35 I hope we are still making an effort. And you are an insecure jerk projecting your own body issues onto the people around you. I look great. And even if I didn’t meet your standards of bike short appropriate body, what’s it to you if DH and I both like what I wear at home?Ladies, stop hating yourselves and don’t be afraid to wear something sexy in front of your DH. Too many women are out there freaking out because they don’t have washboard abs and this is a killer for your sex life. Wear that lingerie, leave those lights on. Take some joy in your sexuality!

There is a whole group of anorexic miserable women in sexless marriages who will never understand what you are talking about. Their DH’s AP’s get it, though.

Actually, you’re the misogynist jerk calling women who don’t want to wear bike shorts over it and out of touch and telling them their husbands will have affairs. Please. Major, major pot kettle misogyny wrapped in word salad body positivity mumble jumbo. I will keep wearing my actual clothes and work wear and expect my husband not to sleep with other woman because he’s a decent person. You carry on being all big women power.

[Anonymous]

I think OP is a troll honestly because of how they write but perhaps an effective troll because they expose so many women in the relationship forum to be such idiots.

Dressing up a bit for your sexual partner should not be taboo. I mean, yes if the DH expects her to look good when he comes home, that is no bueno, if he harps on her looks, that is no bueno, but if she just wants to put some effort into being attractive to the person she expects to have sex with for the rest of her life? That is called 'fostering a good marriage' people. And no I don't mean that anyone who doesn't do this has a bad marriage. Just simply that I do believe that finding ways overall to keep the romantic relationship alive is important and caring about how attracted to one another you are is a part of that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op, you sound really bored and that’s pretty normal with three really young kids at home. When they’re older you’ll be leaving more often and likely will get dressed for the day more often. But yeah, I think this is a little weird, I’m at home so I have to be hot for my provider. If you like it, who cares, but it’s not exactly what I’m going for or what I want for my daughter. I’m sure you will say oh I had some big career before etc etc, but that’s not even what I’m talking about. You’re just reducing it to I’m home so I have to be hot in my shorts. You don’t. I get sexy because I like to. Not because my husband is some big money earner. So think more about your rationale than the act itself, because I think that’s the issue.

OP here- no I was never a top earning professional but I guess I do get a little bored and I do sometimes feel just kind of unkept and “momish” during the day. I’m nursing and cleaning up messes all day so, for me, getting spruced up before DH comes home is for both of us. I have to say I like the feeling when he checks me out and it makes me feel pretty and desirable in a way I obviously don’t when I’m around my kids all day. I don’t feel I owe it to my husband to look hot or anything but it does make me feel more confident. I also really enjoy getting dressed up for date nights so it’s a bit like bringing a tiny bit of that energy into my daily life.

You don't say.

This line of thinking that women are either hot and stupid or smart/successful and don’t care about their looks or their DH is so wrong. You can be smart and look pretty and be accomplished but also want to be sexually desireable to your spouse. OP is sounding a lot smarter than you, pp.

I have no idea if OP is pretty or not (and neither do you). Literally, none. But based on her posts here, it's pretty apparent that she wasn't a high earner.

Being a high earner isn't some amazing achievement. Hookers can be really high earners.

[Anonymous]

I see nothing wrong with brushing your hair and making sure your make-up isn’t smudged, but putting on what sounds like a Hooters outfit seems like a bridge too far.