12 year old hit nanny. WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have to question why a 12 year old has enforced activities with a nanny all day long. I understand he has some special needs but he's old enough to shape his own activities. It doesn't in any way excuse his conduct, but is his frustration building up to a boiling point? Why is he with a nanny for an entire day? A twelve year old, even with special needs, has to have autonomy and independence.

His hitting this woman is inexcusable, but you need to examine the dynamic here. He's too old for this.

Special Needs Mom.

For one day he can't spend the day with the nanny and younger sibling? At 12 a kid should be mature enough to adjust to doing something he doesn't like, especially if it's a one-off or rare happening. People on DCUM treat 12 year olds like they're 3.

[Anonymous]

Only a matter of time before your brat gets what's coming to it. Lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Only a matter of time before your brat gets what's coming to it. Lol.

That applies to everyone. Including you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think OP asked "what would you do?" because this is a difficult situation with ramifications for her kid, her nanny, etc, not because she didn't expect that she had to do something.

I think she also asked that people be constructive, not compare her child to Adam Lanza. I love DCUM but when threads go this way, I definitely feel the need for a break. I can see why she has not returned to this thread.

Thank you. And thank you to all who offered helpful advice.

OP

pp here- I hope that things worked out. I know it must be a hard situation. The special needs forum can be especially helpful for these kinds of episodes.

There are some good books and websites. Here is a website - it's a non profit founded/based off of Ross Green's book "The Explosive Child." There are others, but this might help your DS develop better coping skills.

https://www.livesinthebalance.org/about-lives-in-the-balance