God I hate the ex wife

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:"Or, maybe ex threatens him never to see the kids if he does not pay her random demands or constantly calls and harasses him"

She does not threaten that he cannot see the kids. In the early years she tried this maybe once or twice but it was an empty threat and she doesn't really want that. She texts constantly and he transfers money constantly. Our bank accounts are linked so I get a message a couple times a weeks notifying me of a transfer to her bank account. The emotional leverage she uses is that she says "you can't have x,y,z bc dad won't pay for it." I think that hurts him deeply that she says this bc he's a good guy, he's not a deadbeat or a bad father or a cheap father. Just another example happend this week, when she texted him and said he owed her $268 to sign up for a sport. He transferred it to her account, and then he got a call from dsd saying mom wouldn't sign her up for the sport bc he didn't pay for half. As it turns out, the amount she wanted him to pay was $286 but she texted it wrong. So, when he sent the wrong amount, she immediately painted him as a rotten dad to dsd and said she hadn't signed up dsd for the sport bc dad hadn't paid his half yet.

Op, we don't like you. You can't sit with us.

THIS! x100000000!

That's ok, I'm sitting with your ex and your kids and they like me better than they like you.

Bless your heart. Suga Momma

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Next time marry a man without kids.

Real pearls of wisdom here. Plus unlike you, for me there will not be a next time.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Next time marry a man without kids.

Real pearls of wisdom here. Plus unlike you, for me there will not be a next time.

Of course. It will NEVER happen to you

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH pays regular child support, $500 per kid per month for three kids. The rest of the year she nickel and dimes us for every expense. If DH won't pay half she says "well you can't do x,y,or z bc your dad won't pay." He pays half for all of the expenses for the expensive club sports during the school year, but when he asks her to pay for half their sports camps when we have them on the summer she refuses. She sent the kids up in the summer fresh after a lice infestation and didn't tell us until DSD was itching her scalp uncontrollably and I called her to ask why. She won't pay anything for the lice treatment. She also sent DSD to us with a fungal infection under her arm untreated, bc she doesn't wash their swimsuits regularly. When I called her to get the docs number to get a referral she said to just go to CVS minute clinic and that it was covered. Well it wasn't, and now that the $50 tab was mailed to her houseshe is hounding DH to pay it. She never pays DH back for her half of the plane tix for the kids either. She just says she can't afford it even though her take home pay is now more than his. She is just so cheap and manipulative and uses the kids to extort money from us. I just hate it.

Sigh. It would be really great if women could, for once, put them in the shoes of the other woman, the ex. I'm sure your husband's ex, no matter how much he would like to make things appear that way, is not an evil troll hell-bent on bringing your husband down. Raising a kid is fucking EXPENSIVE. She has EVERY right to ask your husband for half of expenses. if she has primary custody, you can bet your ass her expenses are more than $500 a month. Maybe she didnt notice the lice- you have no way of knowing for sure that she did. I think often with divorces it becomes less about the real issue of whether something is expensive or not and more about "the principle of the thing"- aka, I want to win and I want my partner to absolutely come out the loser. I worked in family law and the stuff we would see was laughable. People would go into getting a divorce, fully expecting to get full custody (with no visitation from their ex), ALL of the assets, and for it to cost them no money. Please... it's so unrealistic that it's mind boggling. That's not how divorce works. Your husband CHOSE to have children with this woman and in doing so he had to know (unless he's a damn fool) that he was linking himself to her for life, or for the rest of his children's lives, legally and financially, if not emotionally as well. I really can't stand cry-baby people who earn more than their ex and then bitch and moan about having to pay them support. If you didnt expect that, you shouldn't have gotten married, plain and simple.

And before you throw this woman under the bus for sticking up for herself and the financial needs of her children, maybe you should consider that, since half of all marriages end in divorce, that might be you someday. And imagine how it would feel to have to call up your annoying ex and see him whine about every measly cent he gives you. And how incredibly emotionally draining that would be. You should be the one telling your husband to be kind and mature to her, and I'm guessing the relationship dynamic you two have with his ex would improve vastly, and so would the lives of the children.

Just like OP will be doing when he moves on to wife #3.

[Anonymous]

You can tell there are some money hungry ex bitches on here lol.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You can tell there are some money hungry ex bitches on here lol.

Exactly, and It's time for my pedi so please pay your CS to me on time this month. Ok?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH pays regular child support, $500 per kid per month for three kids. The rest of the year she nickel and dimes us for every expense. If DH won't pay half she says "well you can't do x,y,or z bc your dad won't pay." He pays half for all of the expenses for the expensive club sports during the school year, but when he asks her to pay for half their sports camps when we have them on the summer she refuses. She sent the kids up in the summer fresh after a lice infestation and didn't tell us until DSD was itching her scalp uncontrollably and I called her to ask why. She won't pay anything for the lice treatment. She also sent DSD to us with a fungal infection under her arm untreated, bc she doesn't wash their swimsuits regularly. When I called her to get the docs number to get a referral she said to just go to CVS minute clinic and that it was covered. Well it wasn't, and now that the $50 tab was mailed to her houseshe is hounding DH to pay it. She never pays DH back for her half of the plane tix for the kids either. She just says she can't afford it even though her take home pay is now more than his. She is just so cheap and manipulative and uses the kids to extort money from us. I just hate it.

Sigh. It would be really great if women could, for once, put them in the shoes of the other woman, the ex. I'm sure your husband's ex, no matter how much he would like to make things appear that way, is not an evil troll hell-bent on bringing your husband down. Raising a kid is fucking EXPENSIVE. She has EVERY right to ask your husband for half of expenses. if she has primary custody, you can bet your ass her expenses are more than $500 a month. Maybe she didnt notice the lice- you have no way of knowing for sure that she did. I think often with divorces it becomes less about the real issue of whether something is expensive or not and more about "the principle of the thing"- aka, I want to win and I want my partner to absolutely come out the loser. I worked in family law and the stuff we would see was laughable. People would go into getting a divorce, fully expecting to get full custody (with no visitation from their ex), ALL of the assets, and for it to cost them no money. Please... it's so unrealistic that it's mind boggling. That's not how divorce works. Your husband CHOSE to have children with this woman and in doing so he had to know (unless he's a damn fool) that he was linking himself to her for life, or for the rest of his children's lives, legally and financially, if not emotionally as well. I really can't stand cry-baby people who earn more than their ex and then bitch and moan about having to pay them support. If you didnt expect that, you shouldn't have gotten married, plain and simple.

And before you throw this woman under the bus for sticking up for herself and the financial needs of her children, maybe you should consider that, since half of all marriages end in divorce, that might be you someday. And imagine how it would feel to have to call up your annoying ex and see him whine about every measly cent he gives you. And how incredibly emotionally draining that would be. You should be the one telling your husband to be kind and mature to her, and I'm guessing the relationship dynamic you two have with his ex would improve vastly, and so would the lives of the children.

Just like OP will be doing when he moves on to wife #3.

Exactly. Karma, baby.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, however strange it may sound, but I think part of your hatred lies in the fact that you are such a great step mom.
I would stop paying for things that are not truly your responsibility. No need for college accounts contributions, salons (even lice treatment ones), or back to school shopping. Just pay for the tix, food, and medical stuff if needed. And yes some gifts. Maybe a camp for each and a mini vacation.
I think you are doing too much, are strained, and all the ex's shit really gets to you because she just takes it for granted.

Hmm, I was actually thinking it was the opposite. If she is doing all of that for the kids because she WANTS to, why all the hate for their mother? So, she pays for it, but she's tallying it up. It seems disingenuous to me.

We've had lice and it's not a big deal. Lice don't live on surfaces, only heads. It only spreads if a pregnant louse jumps to another "clean" head. So, if she took them to the salon, she can wash any sheets they slept on and be done with it (if even that according to my lice lady). Now pinworms....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH pays regular child support, $500 per kid per month for three kids. The rest of the year she nickel and dimes us for every expense. If DH won't pay half she says "well you can't do x,y,or z bc your dad won't pay." He pays half for all of the expenses for the expensive club sports during the school year, but when he asks her to pay for half their sports camps when we have them on the summer she refuses. She sent the kids up in the summer fresh after a lice infestation and didn't tell us until DSD was itching her scalp uncontrollably and I called her to ask why. She won't pay anything for the lice treatment. She also sent DSD to us with a fungal infection under her arm untreated, bc she doesn't wash their swimsuits regularly. When I called her to get the docs number to get a referral she said to just go to CVS minute clinic and that it was covered. Well it wasn't, and now that the $50 tab was mailed to her houseshe is hounding DH to pay it. She never pays DH back for her half of the plane tix for the kids either. She just says she can't afford it even though her take home pay is now more than his. She is just so cheap and manipulative and uses the kids to extort money from us. I just hate it.

Sigh. It would be really great if women could, for once, put them in the shoes of the other woman, the ex. I'm sure your husband's ex, no matter how much he would like to make things appear that way, is not an evil troll hell-bent on bringing your husband down. Raising a kid is fucking EXPENSIVE. She has EVERY right to ask your husband for half of expenses. if she has primary custody, you can bet your ass her expenses are more than $500 a month. Maybe she didnt notice the lice- you have no way of knowing for sure that she did. I think often with divorces it becomes less about the real issue of whether something is expensive or not and more about "the principle of the thing"- aka, I want to win and I want my partner to absolutely come out the loser. I worked in family law and the stuff we would see was laughable. People would go into getting a divorce, fully expecting to get full custody (with no visitation from their ex), ALL of the assets, and for it to cost them no money. Please... it's so unrealistic that it's mind boggling. That's not how divorce works. Your husband CHOSE to have children with this woman and in doing so he had to know (unless he's a damn fool) that he was linking himself to her for life, or for the rest of his children's lives, legally and financially, if not emotionally as well. I really can't stand cry-baby people who earn more than their ex and then bitch and moan about having to pay them support. If you didnt expect that, you shouldn't have gotten married, plain and simple.

And before you throw this woman under the bus for sticking up for herself and the financial needs of her children, maybe you should consider that, since half of all marriages end in divorce, that might be you someday. And imagine how it would feel to have to call up your annoying ex and see him whine about every measly cent he gives you. And how incredibly emotionally draining that would be. You should be the one telling your husband to be kind and mature to her, and I'm guessing the relationship dynamic you two have with his ex would improve vastly, and so would the lives of the children.

Just like OP will be doing when he moves on to wife #3.

Exactly. Karma, baby.

I find it both amusing and sad that the biggest thrill in your life is anticipating my husband moving on to wife number 3. Sorry but unlike you, we take our marriage vows seriously.

[Anonymous]

He takes his marriage seriously after 3 kids from a prior marriage? Wow, he's a slow learner. You've really landed a winner, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He takes his marriage seriously after 3 kids from a prior marriage? Wow, he's a slow learner. You've really landed a winner, OP.

Not the pp but you sound bitter. Get off the butt hurt.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He takes his marriage seriously after 3 kids from a prior marriage? Wow, he's a slow learner. You've really landed a winner, OP.

He is a winner, thank you!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:DH pays regular child support, $500 per kid per month for three kids. The rest of the year she nickel and dimes us for every expense. If DH won't pay half she says "well you can't do x,y,or z bc your dad won't pay." He pays half for all of the expenses for the expensive club sports during the school year, but when he asks her to pay for half their sports camps when we have them on the summer she refuses. She sent the kids up in the summer fresh after a lice infestation and didn't tell us until DSD was itching her scalp uncontrollably and I called her to ask why. She won't pay anything for the lice treatment. She also sent DSD to us with a fungal infection under her arm untreated, bc she doesn't wash their swimsuits regularly. When I called her to get the docs number to get a referral she said to just go to CVS minute clinic and that it was covered. Well it wasn't, and now that the $50 tab was mailed to her houseshe is hounding DH to pay it. She never pays DH back for her half of the plane tix for the kids either. She just says she can't afford it even though her take home pay is now more than his. She is just so cheap and manipulative and uses the kids to extort money from us. I just hate it.

Sigh. It would be really great if women could, for once, put them in the shoes of the other woman, the ex. I'm sure your husband's ex, no matter how much he would like to make things appear that way, is not an evil troll hell-bent on bringing your husband down. Raising a kid is fucking EXPENSIVE. She has EVERY right to ask your husband for half of expenses. if she has primary custody, you can bet your ass her expenses are more than $500 a month. Maybe she didnt notice the lice- you have no way of knowing for sure that she did. I think often with divorces it becomes less about the real issue of whether something is expensive or not and more about "the principle of the thing"- aka, I want to win and I want my partner to absolutely come out the loser. I worked in family law and the stuff we would see was laughable. People would go into getting a divorce, fully expecting to get full custody (with no visitation from their ex), ALL of the assets, and for it to cost them no money. Please... it's so unrealistic that it's mind boggling. That's not how divorce works. Your husband CHOSE to have children with this woman and in doing so he had to know (unless he's a damn fool) that he was linking himself to her for life, or for the rest of his children's lives, legally and financially, if not emotionally as well. I really can't stand cry-baby people who earn more than their ex and then bitch and moan about having to pay them support. If you didnt expect that, you shouldn't have gotten married, plain and simple.

And before you throw this woman under the bus for sticking up for herself and the financial needs of her children, maybe you should consider that, since half of all marriages end in divorce, that might be you someday. And imagine how it would feel to have to call up your annoying ex and see him whine about every measly cent he gives you. And how incredibly emotionally draining that would be. You should be the one telling your husband to be kind and mature to her, and I'm guessing the relationship dynamic you two have with his ex would improve vastly, and so would the lives of the children.

Just like OP will be doing when he moves on to wife #3.

Exactly. Karma, baby.

I find it both amusing and sad that the biggest thrill in your life is anticipating my husband moving on to wife number 3. Sorry but unlike you, we take our marriage vows seriously.

It's certainly not the biggest thrill in my life. But it is akin to slowing down to watch a car crash.

[Anonymous]

Pp these are horrible sentiments to take such pleasure in the hypothetical pain of another. Get off this forum and go to therapy!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pp these are horrible sentiments to take such pleasure in the hypothetical pain of another. Get off this forum and go to therapy!

OP needs to go to therapy for her total lack of compassion to her husband's ex.