God I hate the ex wife

[Anonymous]

DH pays regular child support, $500 per kid per month for three kids. The rest of the year she nickel and dimes us for every expense. If DH won't pay half she says "well you can't do x,y,or z bc your dad won't pay." He pays half for all of the expenses for the expensive club sports during the school year, but when he asks her to pay for half their sports camps when we have them on the summer she refuses. She sent the kids up in the summer fresh after a lice infestation and didn't tell us until DSD was itching her scalp uncontrollably and I called her to ask why. She won't pay anything for the lice treatment. She also sent DSD to us with a fungal infection under her arm untreated, bc she doesn't wash their swimsuits regularly. When I called her to get the docs number to get a referral she said to just go to CVS minute clinic and that it was covered. Well it wasn't, and now that the $50 tab was mailed to her houseshe is hounding DH to pay it. She never pays DH back for her half of the plane tix for the kids either. She just says she can't afford it even though her take home pay is now more than his. She is just so cheap and manipulative and uses the kids to extort money from us. I just hate it.

[Anonymous]

FTR, $500 is not a lot for three kids, just saying. Unfortunately, this is sometimes the price you pay when you marry a man with baggage =( Whatever you do, DO NOT let your hatred for the kids mother get in the way of anyone's relationship. They shouldn't even be aware that there are disagreements about money even happening.
Be the bigger person here!

[Anonymous]

What does the divorce agreement state?

[Anonymous]

wow, my husband paid twice that for one kid. Even if you double that amount, when you include housing and food, it isn't very much for three. If she is court ordered to pay half the plane tickets, then deduct out the medical and other expenses till it is paid off, then pay keeping a running tab. But, if you were decent you would be helping a lot more for THREE kids. She sounds like no prize but you sound like a pill that gives stepmoms a bad name.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:FTR, $500 is not a lot for three kids, just saying. Unfortunately, this is sometimes the price you pay when you marry a man with baggage =( Whatever you do, DO NOT let your hatred for the kids mother get in the way of anyone's relationship. They shouldn't even be aware that there are disagreements about money even happening.
Be the bigger person here!

I believe it's $500 each, $1500 total. That's more than plenty to pay her fair share. Not OP, but I totally get the resentment. My DH's ex would play the same, "you can't do X because your dad won't pay" BS even though he was not only paying child support, but was also regularly buying groceries for his ex's house (she was perpetually on one of those diets where food is delivered and just didn't bother to shop much) plus bought all his daughter's clothes and anything she needed from Target, etc when he saw her after school every day. The ex also often neglected to pay basic utilities so DH would
Pay for the to be reconnected if he dropped her off and saw the lights or cable were out. Still, she found $$ for mani/pedis each week, a new car every 4 years (DH and I share one) and vacations every year (DH and I can't afford). So yeah, I get the bitterness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTR, $500 is not a lot for three kids, just saying. Unfortunately, this is sometimes the price you pay when you marry a man with baggage =( Whatever you do, DO NOT let your hatred for the kids mother get in the way of anyone's relationship. They shouldn't even be aware that there are disagreements about money even happening.
Be the bigger person here!

I believe it's $500 each, $1500 total. That's more than plenty to pay her fair share. Not OP, but I totally get the resentment. My DH's ex would play the same, "you can't do X because your dad won't pay" BS even though he was not only paying child support, but was also regularly buying groceries for his ex's house (she was perpetually on one of those diets where food is delivered and just didn't bother to shop much) plus bought all his daughter's clothes and anything she needed from Target, etc when he saw her after school every day. The ex also often neglected to pay basic utilities so DH would
Pay for the to be reconnected if he dropped her off and saw the lights or cable were out. Still, she found $$ for mani/pedis each week, a new car every 4 years (DH and I share one) and vacations every year (DH and I can't afford). So yeah, I get the bitterness.

Yea, I thought the OP meant $1500 a month, too.

[Anonymous]

OP here. It is 1500 per month, 500 per kid. Their ages are 14,13, and 9.

[Anonymous]

Aggravating for sure.

Keep a running tab and take her half out of what you pay her. I believe your DH still needs to pay the $1500/month, but keep a running tab for plane tickets, sports and the other extras.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. It is 1500 per month, 500 per kid. Their ages are 14,13, and 9.

That is very cheap.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTR, $500 is not a lot for three kids, just saying. Unfortunately, this is sometimes the price you pay when you marry a man with baggage =( Whatever you do, DO NOT let your hatred for the kids mother get in the way of anyone's relationship. They shouldn't even be aware that there are disagreements about money even happening.
Be the bigger person here!

I believe it's $500 each, $1500 total. That's more than plenty to pay her fair share. Not OP, but I totally get the resentment. My DH's ex would play the same, "you can't do X because your dad won't pay" BS even though he was not only paying child support, but was also regularly buying groceries for his ex's house (she was perpetually on one of those diets where food is delivered and just didn't bother to shop much) plus bought all his daughter's clothes and anything she needed from Target, etc when he saw her after school every day. The ex also often neglected to pay basic utilities so DH would
Pay for the to be reconnected if he dropped her off and saw the lights or cable were out. Still, she found $$ for mani/pedis each week, a new car every 4 years (DH and I share one) and vacations every year (DH and I can't afford). So yeah, I get the bitterness.

Oh you're OP. This is DC UM. DC Metro 1500 ain't shit. If you don't have kids you should leave and find a man without kids. Your ex should be paying a lot more. I presume you add to the household income.

[Anonymous]

OP again. Sorry I did not address the court order. The court order dictates the amount of the support. He covers their health insurance. Not sure how medical bill work, they probably split them bc he paid for half of glasses and braces. They split activities, except she never pays for when the activities are with us in the summer. They split travel, except she never pays him back for tix. The last thing she told DSD was that she couldn't get an updo for homecoming bc dad wouldn't pay half for it. Not "you're a freshman and we are not spending $120 on your hair." Not "if you want an updo you can do extra chores to pay for it."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. It is 1500 per month, 500 per kid. Their ages are 14,13, and 9.

That is very cheap.

This! Bite your tongue before she takes him back to court.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:FTR, $500 is not a lot for three kids, just saying. Unfortunately, this is sometimes the price you pay when you marry a man with baggage =( Whatever you do, DO NOT let your hatred for the kids mother get in the way of anyone's relationship. They shouldn't even be aware that there are disagreements about money even happening.
Be the bigger person here!

I believe it's $500 each, $1500 total. That's more than plenty to pay her fair share. Not OP, but I totally get the resentment. My DH's ex would play the same, "you can't do X because your dad won't pay" BS even though he was not only paying child support, but was also regularly buying groceries for his ex's house (she was perpetually on one of those diets where food is delivered and just didn't bother to shop much) plus bought all his daughter's clothes and anything she needed from Target, etc when he saw her after school every day. The ex also often neglected to pay basic utilities so DH would
Pay for the to be reconnected if he dropped her off and saw the lights or cable were out. Still, she found $$ for mani/pedis each week, a new car every 4 years (DH and I share one) and vacations every year (DH and I can't afford). So yeah, I get the bitterness.

Oh you're OP. This is DC UM. DC Metro 1500 ain't shit. If you don't have kids you should leave and find a man without kids. Your ex should be paying a lot more. I presume you add to the household income.

She lives in Houston.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP again. Sorry I did not address the court order. The court order dictates the amount of the support. He covers their health insurance. Not sure how medical bill work, they probably split them bc he paid for half of glasses and braces. They split activities, except she never pays for when the activities are with us in the summer. They split travel, except she never pays him back for tix. The last thing she told DSD was that she couldn't get an updo for homecoming bc dad wouldn't pay half for it. Not "you're a freshman and we are not spending $120 on your hair." Not "if you want an updo you can do extra chores to pay for it."

Ok so you know exactly Jack about their agreement. Educate yourself first before you make yourself sound like an idiot.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately, this is the reality of marrying a divorced man with three kids and child support expenses.