Culture for Girls at Southern Schools

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

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Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She needs to go to college in a major city. LA, Boston, NY.

All the girls at the SEC schools we toured seemed really, really happy, even the ones that dod not look like a stereotypical 'Bama sorority rush poster.

If she liked the southern university, let her apply and see what happens. She might meet some really kind, happy, interesting friends at those places.

That's because in the south girls are taught to smile constantly, no matter how happy or unhappy. As I was.

No.

They were all just nice kids.

What a naive response. At the SEC school where my daughter attends, she said there are sororities which will recruit only blondes. Of course they have to take in the occasional brunette here and there so not to make it too obvious, but the unsaid requirement is that you have to be blonde. So nice, right? So nice.

Is it posdible your daughter is just repeating stereotypes that don't hold water?

"All" and "only" quantifiers are a very middle school way to process things.

No, literally she was told by one of the members that she was "lucky" that she got in because they like to have blonde girls be the majority of their house. However, since she has a pretty face and a good number of Instagram followers, she made the cut. She didn't last long there. That's how shallow some of these girls are. My other daughter is in another sorority (Midwest) and it's not like that.

Sorority recruitment is strange at some of these schools and can turn into a weird pretty girl popularity contest and it really isn’t for everyone. A big component of this are the parties which are all held by the frats. The frats want hot fun girls at their parties which circles back to sororities picking girls in a shallow manner.

Corporate America is a weird popularity contest. Hell, life is a weird popularity contest. And dimes will always have an advantage, regardless of how little else they bring to the table. Countless studies over decades have shown this. Foyine girls get hired more, paid more, treated better, helped faster when broken down on the side of the road, and the list goes on. You can't escape this reality by avoiding the Greek system in college. Might as well practice for it.

Foyine girls guy, does your sorority dime wife know that you post here?

New clue: Overton window. Are you Metro NYC? You're talking like a finance bro.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Rice is not southern sorority culture. It's the JHU of the south.

JHU has sororities

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's terrible and present at almost all southern schools. Vanderbilt, UVA, SECs are the worst offenders. Some schools like Rice do not have this problem, but most do. Extremely shallow people and rampant, deep-seated lookism.

My UVA daughter ended up pledging a sorority this year. It’s not one of the so-called top tier sororities but she’s found welcoming, kind, fun women there. And it’s not all white women. Just wanted to put that out there. Two of her closest friends are Asian American and they pledged other sororities.
Not saying she should rush but trying to make the point that not all UVA sororities are like the ones described in this thread.

I think this is kind of where the disagreement is happening with the sorority thing. Shallow women attract shallow friends. When I was in school there were groups that attracted super bubbly nice girls, super academic women, and of course there was the hot girl sororities that definitely picked based on looks. I think the “lookism” thing exists but it doesn’t apply everywhere.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It's terrible and present at almost all southern schools. Vanderbilt, UVA, SECs are the worst offenders. Some schools like Rice do not have this problem, but most do. Extremely shallow people and rampant, deep-seated lookism.

My UVA daughter ended up pledging a sorority this year. It’s not one of the so-called top tier sororities but she’s found welcoming, kind, fun women there. And it’s not all white women. Just wanted to put that out there. Two of her closest friends are Asian American and they pledged other sororities.
Not saying she should rush but trying to make the point that not all UVA sororities are like the ones described in this thread.

I think this is kind of where the disagreement is happening with the sorority thing. Shallow women attract shallow friends. When I was in school there were groups that attracted super bubbly nice girls, super academic women, and of course there was the hot girl sororities that definitely picked based on looks. I think the “lookism” thing exists but it doesn’t apply everywhere.

I’m the quoted PP. You are probably right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She will be fine at Duke, many are not like that. Vanderbilt has changed a lot but is still more into looks/greek than Duke.
Both of those schools have a good percentage of Asians (Wasian mom of Duke 2026) and are not really southern culture, they have too many nerdy types(meant as a compliment).
Ivies have more asians than D and V and have no slight southern flare, but can still have some clicky girl groups. Same with Chicago.
UNC is NOT going to be a fit. UVa and Wake will not work either. Fully avoid SMU UGA AUBurn et al.
Look at William and Mary! Not as intellectually vibey as Duke but is much closer to it than big publics.

This, OP.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She will be fine at Duke, many are not like that. Vanderbilt has changed a lot but is still more into looks/greek than Duke.
Both of those schools have a good percentage of Asians (Wasian mom of Duke 2026) and are not really southern culture, they have too many nerdy types(meant as a compliment).
Ivies have more asians than D and V and have no slight southern flare, but can still have some clicky girl groups. Same with Chicago.
UNC is NOT going to be a fit. UVa and Wake will not work either. Fully avoid SMU UGA AUBurn et al.
Look at William and Mary! Not as intellectually vibey as Duke but is much closer to it than big publics.

This, OP.

I'm pretty confident that Rice, Duke, and Vanderbilt have more Asian-American students than Harvard, Yale, or Princeton.

The stereotypes that people seem to have about Southern schools are ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She will be fine at Duke, many are not like that. Vanderbilt has changed a lot but is still more into looks/greek than Duke.
Both of those schools have a good percentage of Asians (Wasian mom of Duke 2026) and are not really southern culture, they have too many nerdy types(meant as a compliment).
Ivies have more asians than D and V and have no slight southern flare, but can still have some clicky girl groups. Same with Chicago.
UNC is NOT going to be a fit. UVa and Wake will not work either. Fully avoid SMU UGA AUBurn et al.
Look at William and Mary! Not as intellectually vibey as Duke but is much closer to it than big publics.

This, OP.

I'm pretty confident that Rice, Duke, and Vanderbilt have more Asian-American students than Harvard, Yale, or Princeton.

The stereotypes that people seem to have about Southern schools are ridiculous.

I doubt that. Collegefactual says Princeton is 22% Asian and Vanderbilt is 14%.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She will be fine at Duke, many are not like that. Vanderbilt has changed a lot but is still more into looks/greek than Duke.
Both of those schools have a good percentage of Asians (Wasian mom of Duke 2026) and are not really southern culture, they have too many nerdy types(meant as a compliment).
Ivies have more asians than D and V and have no slight southern flare, but can still have some clicky girl groups. Same with Chicago.
UNC is NOT going to be a fit. UVa and Wake will not work either. Fully avoid SMU UGA AUBurn et al.
Look at William and Mary! Not as intellectually vibey as Duke but is much closer to it than big publics.

This, OP.

I'm pretty confident that Rice, Duke, and Vanderbilt have more Asian-American students than Harvard, Yale, or Princeton.

The stereotypes that people seem to have about Southern schools are ridiculous.

I doubt that. Collegefactual says Princeton is 22% Asian and Vanderbilt is 14%.

Duke has slightly more Asians than Yale (21.0% vs 20.2%)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In order of the number of sorority dimes on campus and their sway over the social scene:

Vanderbilt
Duke
Emory
Rice

Rice in particular has no Greek system and attracts a nerdier crowd, but it's VERY woke, and the Overton window of acceptable views on campus covers only the far left end of the political spectrum. I personally know of a pro-Israel Jewish student who had to finish his last semester online because he was being harassed by the pro-Hamas crowd to the point that it was impacting his education and mental health.

This was at Rice?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She will be fine at Duke, many are not like that. Vanderbilt has changed a lot but is still more into looks/greek than Duke.
Both of those schools have a good percentage of Asians (Wasian mom of Duke 2026) and are not really southern culture, they have too many nerdy types(meant as a compliment).
Ivies have more asians than D and V and have no slight southern flare, but can still have some clicky girl groups. Same with Chicago.
UNC is NOT going to be a fit. UVa and Wake will not work either. Fully avoid SMU UGA AUBurn et al.
Look at William and Mary! Not as intellectually vibey as Duke but is much closer to it than big publics.

This, OP.

I'm pretty confident that Rice, Duke, and Vanderbilt have more Asian-American students than Harvard, Yale, or Princeton.

The stereotypes that people seem to have about Southern schools are ridiculous.

I doubt that. Collegefactual says Princeton is 22% Asian and Vanderbilt is 14%.

Duke has slightly more Asians than Yale (21.0% vs 20.2%)

And Rice is 30 percent Asian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In order of the number of sorority dimes on campus and their sway over the social scene:

Vanderbilt
Duke
Emory
Rice

Rice in particular has no Greek system and attracts a nerdier crowd, but it's VERY woke, and the Overton window of acceptable views on campus covers only the far left end of the political spectrum. I personally know of a pro-Israel Jewish student who had to finish his last semester online because he was being harassed by the pro-Hamas crowd to the point that it was impacting his education and mental health.

This was at Rice?

Yes. This semester.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She needs to go to college in a major city. LA, Boston, NY.

Or a small liberal arts college. Anywhere but the South. The documentary they had on Amazon Prime showed a disturbing sorority system. Based on picture from the 80s and today it seems like looks have become more important. The 80s pictures there was a variety of female students with all different looks. The recent pictures showed the majority of them dye their hair bright blonde. They all had similar clothing and looks. They are judged by which sorority they belong to. Women can’t have men in their dorm room like it’s 1958.

It’s not worth worrying about fitting in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a hs senior dd and had similar questions and concerns. From my anecdotal research (speaking with current college students and parents), the social scene at many (but not all) of the top private and public schools is pretty cliquey and dominated by wealthy, attractive, popular kids - often from private/prep schools. You don't have to be blond, but it does help if you are wealthy and attractive. Even girls who are not 'dresssed up' often wear designer jewelry and accessories. Its kind of crazy. These kids have already identified each other on social media before arriving on campus. Duke and Vanderbilt for sure are like this. Rice no, bc no greek and student body is very different. Emory- not as bad. It's not a southern thing. It's a wealthy/private school thing. You don't have to he part of it, but it is good for kids to think about how they can see themselves having fun outside those groups if they prevail on campus. There are plenty of non greek and non girly girls at duke amd vandy, you just have to find your group. I think it's sad, but it's the reality these kids face.

The Southern thing is not about wealth although I’m sure there are small groups of them. It’s about fitting into a box that has been clearly marked.

[Anonymous]

Yes, this is a thing in the south. The conformist, appearance heavy culture can be so horrible that kids feel they need to transfer. Speaking from personal experience. Cough cough UVA.

[Anonymous]

Perhaps consider colleges that don’t have sororities, such as most LACs?