Anyone watching Maid on Netflix?

[Anonymous]

The one "bad choice" that I could absolutely relate to was when her kid started screaming in the car for losing her toy and she was on the run and under extreme stress so she stopped the car to look for the toy.
I've been frazzled--nowhere near that kind of frazzled and I too would have done anything to get my kid to stop screaming. Maybe i wouldn't have stopped on the side of a highway to look for a toy but I've so been there when you just desperately need the screaming to stop so you can think and everything just escalates.

[Anonymous]

I will say the show is nothing like the book. So you can't really ask questions about Alex in the show and answer from Stephanie's actual choices or options.

Both are worth a watch or read, though you will still be left with questions. The book is good, but not detailed. It moves quickly, but you can't really even compare the two. The show is more detailed (and still has some plot holes, discussed here) and only focuses on about a six month period.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:PP here. Gotta say I find the responses here completely fascinating.

Right off the bat you have people saying "Alex should have taken help from all these people that offered!" Then when she does take help from Nate - a guy who has been interested in her romantically since before she was with Sean, BTW - she's criticized for not being grateful and dating the wonderful Nate. But the truth is, she IS interested in Nate, but not from a position of her being homeless and living in his house to secure her child's access to this fabulous preschool (which, of course, Nate introduced her to).

Did she screw up by sleeping with Sean. Well, yes. But if you want to - go re-watch that scene. Alex is in shock. She's just taken her mother to the hospital in the midst of a major mental health issue and major injury. She can't even clean herself up. Sean is wiping her mother's blood off of her. Sleeping with Sean was obviously a mistake, but it's really interesting that every other character gets to be a complete screwup and yet are absolved of their sins except Alex.

And Sean is perfectly happy to take her back to the trailer and sleep with her without one thought of where HIS daughter is and who is looking after her. At one point prior to this night Sean says he doesn't want Maddy living at Nate's but then he's perfectly happy to leave Maddy there overnight with no phone call to Nate as long as he is able to sleep with Alex. And when Alex wakes up the next morning, she's freaked out and immediately wants to get back to Maddy and Sean...wants to cook breakfast.

I don't really fault Nate for his reaction (I was the one that said he was nasty to her), but clearly his motives were never totally benevolent even if they were well-intentioned.

In general, I found Alex to be remarkably focused and level headed, despite her childhood (which her dad also gets a total pass for), she's a great mother to Maddy, and I think she should get the chance to screw up too.

I agree. However allowing wine at her child’s birthday party was a ridiculous and costly mistake. No excuse for that stupidity. It cost her daughter a perfect place to live.

[Anonymous]

Not just wine - pot and hard liquor. There was no excuse for that, period. As another PP pointed out, she could've asked her landladies to kick them out, call the police, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So I finished watching it. My stbx left me in fairly precarious circumstances but nothing like here. I get the struggle of juggling work and childcare (my kid had to walk home from school and stay home alone much earlier than I would like), but I found social workers I encountered helpful and compassionate. I can’t imagine them saying something about “toothless white trash” to a person’s face at least.
What was also fascinating is that Alex kept making dumb decisions but it all was understandable and kind of followed from her previous circumstances... who brings a tinder date to a house you are cleaning? But she was so tired and lonely and jealous of this beautiful life others had, I can understand how she took that one wrong step (yet another one)
Or at the birthday party how she suddenly doesn’t feel the power to say no to all those idiots ruining it for her...it’s hard to be intimidated and the less energy and stability you have the easier you give up
What was not believable is how she was allowed to serve papers on her stbx herself - you always need a third party...
also it doesn’t look believable how Sean suddenly wants to give custody to her... and did she really have to take Maddie away from him?!

So she should stay and clean houses for a living instead of getting a college degree so her abusive, alcoholic ex doesn't have to be away from his daughter? Are you for real?

There are colleges in Washington state too

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m not happy that they said food stamps benefits are weekly they are monthly

Also one can’t serve their own court papers (like alex does with the move away order)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I loved it! I’m a bit naive and privileged so I think it helped me see the other side. She just had so many crazies around her that drag her down and I’ve never experienced that.

I loved Nate and wished she would date him. I married a man just like him and he’s such a great dad and husband.

Nate wasn't a good guy. He was offering to help her so long as she met his expectations (Date him). He exemplifies how so many women, who leave abusive relationships fall into other abusive or controlling relationships. He appears as the knight in shining armor but he isn't.

So no, I am glad she didn't date Nate.

I don't think he was a "bad" guy, but he wasn't good for her and obviously wasn't helping her out of sole concern for her welfare.

While I think it's understandable that he was upset that she spent the night with, and slept with Sean, he was really nasty when asking her to leave. He had really had no clue what she was dealing with and didn't realize what he didn't know.

No, he was not a “bad guy”. How many men do you know would happily babysit a kid while the mom is boinking her abusive ex-boyfriend?

+1
I didn't think he was a bad guy at all. I could see why Alex wasn't attracted to him (I wasn't either!), but he helped her so, so much. He couldn't help it if he was attracted to her. I think the night she stayed at Sean's he finally realized that he was being used, even if she didn't mean it that way. It was time for Alex to get her shit together and start making better choices. I don't think he was wrong for asking her to leave.

I think he should have let her stay for a few more days so she could find another place, not kicked her out the same day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The one "bad choice" that I could absolutely relate to was when her kid started screaming in the car for losing her toy and she was on the run and under extreme stress so she stopped the car to look for the toy.
I've been frazzled--nowhere near that kind of frazzled and I too would have done anything to get my kid to stop screaming. Maybe i wouldn't have stopped on the side of a highway to look for a toy but I've so been there when you just desperately need the screaming to stop so you can think and everything just escalates.

Back in the day I let my kid scream
When you are driving your focus is on driving. She basically caused the accident.
A 2 year old cannot hurt herself by crying over a toy

[Anonymous]

I heard this author on Fresh Air the other day. All I could think is "wow- what people won't do for a best seller"

Insufferable. Could not listen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The one "bad choice" that I could absolutely relate to was when her kid started screaming in the car for losing her toy and she was on the run and under extreme stress so she stopped the car to look for the toy.
I've been frazzled--nowhere near that kind of frazzled and I too would have done anything to get my kid to stop screaming. Maybe i wouldn't have stopped on the side of a highway to look for a toy but I've so been there when you just desperately need the screaming to stop so you can think and everything just escalates.

Back in the day I let my kid scream
When you are driving your focus is on driving. She basically caused the accident.
A 2 year old cannot hurt herself by crying over a toy

Have you ever been at the end of your rope? Like really at the end of your rope? And terrified for your own life? Trust me-you would do anything to end the screaming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The one "bad choice" that I could absolutely relate to was when her kid started screaming in the car for losing her toy and she was on the run and under extreme stress so she stopped the car to look for the toy.
I've been frazzled--nowhere near that kind of frazzled and I too would have done anything to get my kid to stop screaming. Maybe i wouldn't have stopped on the side of a highway to look for a toy but I've so been there when you just desperately need the screaming to stop so you can think and everything just escalates.

Back in the day I let my kid scream
When you are driving your focus is on driving. She basically caused the accident.
A 2 year old cannot hurt herself by crying over a toy

Have you ever been at the end of your rope? Like really at the end of your rope? And terrified for your own life? Trust me-you would do anything to end the screaming.

Many times
My kids did their fare share of screaming. You cannot give in to a kids every whim. When you are not wealthy there is no nanny to see to the kids needs. They learn quickly that they are not the center of everything and do not get what they want.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The one "bad choice" that I could absolutely relate to was when her kid started screaming in the car for losing her toy and she was on the run and under extreme stress so she stopped the car to look for the toy.
I've been frazzled--nowhere near that kind of frazzled and I too would have done anything to get my kid to stop screaming. Maybe i wouldn't have stopped on the side of a highway to look for a toy but I've so been there when you just desperately need the screaming to stop so you can think and everything just escalates.

Back in the day I let my kid scream
When you are driving your focus is on driving. She basically caused the accident.
A 2 year old cannot hurt herself by crying over a toy

Have you ever been at the end of your rope? Like really at the end of your rope? And terrified for your own life? Trust me-you would do anything to end the screaming.

She was not "terrified for her own life." Quit the hyperbole.
DP

[Anonymous]

This is a great series, one of the best I have ever seen.
I have just one episode until the end.

I think Margaret Qualley is an excellent up-and-coming actress.
Her talent is beyond any other young actress today.

She deserves an Oscar for portraying a character that she has absolutely nothing in common with.
That takes a ton of authentic talent.

[Anonymous]

At first I truly believed that Nate was a genuine good guy.
I thought he could be Alex’s knight in shining armor per say.

However as the show progressed - it appeared obvious that Nate attached strings to the kind things he did for Alex + Maddie.

From the get go > Alex made it perfectly clear that she wasn’t interested in getting into another relationship so soon after splitting w/Sean.
Nate said he understood and that there were no strings attached for helping her out.
He should have known better than to consider having a relationship w/someone who was trying her best to leave a bad one.
She was crystal clear about what she wanted, or didn’t want and he (like a typical man!) did not take what she told him at face value.

He was mean when he put her & her child out in the street for sleeping w/Sean.
If he were truly a legit friend, he would have let them stay until they found another home.
To close her off to him considering she had a three year old was just selfish and cruel.
Completely unacceptable behavior.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:At first I truly believed that Nate was a genuine good guy.
I thought he could be Alex’s knight in shining armor per say.

However as the show progressed - it appeared obvious that Nate attached strings to the kind things he did for Alex + Maddie.

From the get go > Alex made it perfectly clear that she wasn’t interested in getting into another relationship so soon after splitting w/Sean.
Nate said he understood and that there were no strings attached for helping her out.
He should have known better than to consider having a relationship w/someone who was trying her best to leave a bad one.
She was crystal clear about what she wanted, or didn’t want and he (like a typical man!) did not take what she told him at face value.

He was mean when he put her & her child out in the street for sleeping w/Sean.
If he were truly a legit friend, he would have let them stay until they found another home.
To close her off to him considering she had a three year old was just selfish and cruel.
Completely unacceptable behavior.

I agree except that last part. We didn’t see him telling her to leave, right? If I’m remembering that correctly, then I’m willing to bet it was her decision to leave. She knew it wasn’t going to work and left on her own before it got worse. Obviously not the first time she left a place without having a place to sleep that night.