Sex when others are around

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you try to be as quiet as possible when you have sex and the kids are in the house, or don't you care if they hear? I remember hearing my parents a lot when I was a kid and didn't think much of it, but a friend was recently asked to keep it down by her teen son and was mortified that he could hear them at night (even though he's only a room away...duh he can hear you...).

Quite a bold little millennial! If my own DS ever said this to me, I would bring to his attention all the times I've heard heavy breathing and squeaky mattress springs coming from his room as I'm on my way to wake him up in the morning. That would end the conversation pretty quickly.

Trying to sexually shame him? Thats rich coming from someone who's already deep in the trenches of sexual decline.

Oh please. My only point is that everyone in this house is mature enough to understand the need for sexual release, and you can't always hide when it's happening. I would never confront DS about how often we hear him masturbating, so I would hope the understanding is mutual.

Please, God. I hope I never hear my children masturbating. I need to start saving up for sound proofing the entire house. There are still prek so I have some time to either save up or get some therapy to deal with my issues.

This happened to us about 10 years. DW woke me up one night late when she heard sounds coming from 15yo DD's room down the hall. The sounds were sub-human grunting noises and DW was really concerned so I told her is she is worried then go check it out.

A quick knock and the door cracked open was followed by a little scream and the door slammed shut again. When my wife returned to our bedroom she looked like she has seen a ghost instead of DD with a hairbrush.

Ugh please stop posting these things!

Hysterical! PP ... Stop reading if you don't like it!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Please, God. I hope I never hear my children masturbating. I need to start saving up for sound proofing the entire house. There are still prek so I have some time to either save up or get some therapy to deal with my issues.

Not sure why you would. I never made any noise. My only concern was wondering if they noticed me using the bathroom five times a day for 20 minutes at a time.

PP, that made me laugh. I can totally relate in a btdt way. I assumed my parents were 'hip' to what I was up to and the only question they might have had was where the 'reading' material was. Last house we had there was a perfect hiding place with a way to know if it had been accessed. lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess we're a little more open with communication (and sarcasm) in this house. Here's a dialogue between DS(16) and me (his dad) on a Saturday morning a few months ago. I was helping the wife out with the laundry while she ran errands.

Me: Wake up. Are you going to sleep all day?
DS: I didn't sleep well last night.
Me: What was wrong?
DS: Things were pretty noisy around here.
Me: Oh. Well sorry about that. Now get up. I need your sheets.
DS: I can't until you leave. I'm not wearing anything.
Me: Oh reallllly. Nudie nudie, huh? Looks like somebody else had some fun of his own last night.
DS: Well, if ya can't beat'em, join'em.

This is what I love about this kid. He's considerate and well behaved, but he can give it right back to you every time. And he got the point across loud and clear without having to bang on our door.

This is disgusting.

[Anonymous]

How do some couples only have sex when the house is empty? That would be very seldom around here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:4 y.o. DS hopped into bed with us this very morning while DH was inside me. He didn't pull out right away and tried to finish while DS was trying to cuddle up in front of me. I wanted to strangle DH and gave him a horse kick bc he was still slowly pumping away after a minute or two (Yes, door should have been locked). Sex is frequent so he should've stopped right away. DS had no clue, but I was infinitely uncomfortable.

Thats truly disgusting and sickening and reminds me of this XOJane article about a child molestor who was always trying to have sex with this woman while her child was in bed.

Truly gross. Your DH has issues

Ugh...calm down. Is sex that disgusting that you would relate this to child molestation?? Geez, who's really got the problem here? I suppose some people might think it inappropriate, but a man and woman are expressing love for each other in a physical way. Can that REALLY harm a kid the same way as being sexually abused?? It's not like they were uncovered and putting on a show for the kid. Personally, I thought it was kind of funny. Then again, I can say penis and vagina in public without getting embarrassed.

Penis. Vagina. See?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guess we're a little more open with communication (and sarcasm) in this house. Here's a dialogue between DS(16) and me (his dad) on a Saturday morning a few months ago. I was helping the wife out with the laundry while she ran errands.

Me: Wake up. Are you going to sleep all day?
DS: I didn't sleep well last night.
Me: What was wrong?
DS: Things were pretty noisy around here.
Me: Oh. Well sorry about that. Now get up. I need your sheets.
DS: I can't until you leave. I'm not wearing anything.
Me: Oh reallllly. Nudie nudie, huh? Looks like somebody else had some fun of his own last night.
DS: Well, if ya can't beat'em, join'em.

This is what I love about this kid. He's considerate and well behaved, but he can give it right back to you every time. And he got the point across loud and clear without having to bang on our door.

This is disgusting.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Beig heard is not something I ever want to happen, but also not something I ever care about in the moment.