Are people secretive about their FA status at your private school?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't be upset that I'm not poor AND was smart and savvy enough to figure out how to get financial aid for my DC.

So you steal.

Nope. To steal is to take something from someone without their knowledge or consent. I applied for FA, fully disclosed my income and responded to every single question asked of me. I did not lie. I did not hide assets. I did not under report or over report. My DC's school reviewed my application and made me an offer. I accepted. Just because I am not poor does not mean I do not have financial obligations that made me an acceptable candidate for financial aid. Like I said, you might want to take a look at that MEDIAN income chart and ask yourself exactly what does it mean to be poor before you start calling someone "poor" like its a bad word or a disgraceful thing. Check you rich (if you are even rich -- I doubt it) egotistical crap at the door.

OK, then you are poor. Own it.

If you consider a HHI of $250K poor, then yes I'm poor. If you consider someone who drives a luxury SUV poor, then yes I'm poor. If you consider someone who lives in a 3000 square foot house poor, then yes I'm poor.

I do not consider myself poor and I suspect none on DCUM (based on prior threads) would consider me poor. I however, am not rich by wealthy standards. I don't own a summer beach home. I don't own a boat. I don't own a home without a mortgage. I don't travel to the Apls or go on month long African Safari vacations. See there is a huge gap between being poor and being rich. It's called MIDDLE CLASS!

There is something deeply wrong with a school who will give a person like this thousands of dollars a year while There are thousands and thousands of children in this city who would TRULY benefit from an opportunity to attend a better school than the one their parents can afford. At this point in the discussion, the blame is on the admissions staff. The admissions staff's at this school needs some serious help,
As further evidenced by the fact that they gave the above idiot FA.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't be upset that I'm not poor AND was smart and savvy enough to figure out how to get financial aid for my DC.

So you steal.

Nope. To steal is to take something from someone without their knowledge or consent. I applied for FA, fully disclosed my income and responded to every single question asked of me. I did not lie. I did not hide assets. I did not under report or over report. My DC's school reviewed my application and made me an offer. I accepted. Just because I am not poor does not mean I do not have financial obligations that made me an acceptable candidate for financial aid. Like I said, you might want to take a look at that MEDIAN income chart and ask yourself exactly what does it mean to be poor before you start calling someone "poor" like its a bad word or a disgraceful thing. Check you rich (if you are even rich -- I doubt it) egotistical crap at the door.

OK, then you are poor. Own it.

If you consider a HHI of $250K poor, then yes I'm poor. If you consider someone who drives a luxury SUV poor, then yes I'm poor. If you consider someone who lives in a 3000 square foot house poor, then yes I'm poor.

I do not consider myself poor and I suspect none on DCUM (based on prior threads) would consider me poor. I however, am not rich by wealthy standards. I don't own a summer beach home. I don't own a boat. I don't own a home without a mortgage. I don't travel to the Apls or go on month long African Safari vacations. See there is a huge gap between being poor and being rich. It's called MIDDLE CLASS!

There is something deeply wrong with a school who will give a person like this thousands of dollars a year while There are thousands and thousands of children in this city who would TRULY benefit from an opportunity to attend a better school than the one their parents can afford. At this point in the discussion, the blame is on the admissions staff. The admissions staff's at this school needs some serious help,
As further evidenced by the fact that they gave the above idiot FA.

Idiot? LMAO. Takes one to know one. Your entire rant shows just how little you know about the private school world. Are these so called children even applying to these schools? Are these so called children academically qualified to be admitted to these schools? Are these so called children's parents committed to the type of sacrifices one makes when you enroll your child in a priavte school? The play dates, the volunteering, the social dynamics of rich people who will always look at you like you are a charity case? You are plum clueless about it's not as simple as finding underprivileged kids to give an opportunity. Maybe those kids parents do not want to send their kids to private school. But yes, it's the administrations fault who applies and who doesn't apply to their school. No one from my DCs school sought me out. No one did outreach to find me. I, as a parent, wanted this for my DC so I sought it out. They had no control over whether I applied or not. The fact that they were impressed with my child and my family, and decided we are a family they want to be a part of their community is a blessing. A blessing I won't allow you or anyone to make me believe my child is not deserving of. So please take your fake "I care about the poor kids of this city" BS and go sit down somewhere.

[Anonymous]

So let me get this right, the only people who should be able to send their DC to private school are the rich and the poor? To hell with the middle class? Please explain that rationale to me. The middle class are the some of the most hard working people in this country, yet their kids should not be able to go to an expensice private school because they missed the mark on how to surpass being middle class and become rich. Yet, the poor (for whatever reason they are poor) now their kids deserve this. I'm seriously confused. How can you hate on someone who can afford to pay something and gush over someone who can't afford to pay a penny?

[Anonymous]

It is a better investment for schools to give aid those who can with a minimal amount of assistance afford the school from K-12. This approach allows dozens of children to attend instead of giving 50% to 5 children who despite the assistance may still not be able to afford all 12 years. Giving 15-25% off tuition to family with hhi of 250 allows them to put 2-3 kids through the school. I agree with the PP, simply giving 50-75% of aid to a family earning less than 100k is still not enough for them to cover the remainder plus all the other social costs of attending private. Its not the best system, but one that keeps schools operating and pays teachers a living wage.

[Anonymous]

Our DD is starting at one of the all-girl schools this fall even though we missed receiving FA but apparently not much. We are applying again his fall. There is no shame in it and our wallet will be grateful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don't be upset that I'm not poor AND was smart and savvy enough to figure out how to get financial aid for my DC.

So you steal.

Nope. To steal is to take something from someone without their knowledge or consent. I applied for FA, fully disclosed my income and responded to every single question asked of me. I did not lie. I did not hide assets. I did not under report or over report. My DC's school reviewed my application and made me an offer. I accepted. Just because I am not poor does not mean I do not have financial obligations that made me an acceptable candidate for financial aid. Like I said, you might want to take a look at that MEDIAN income chart and ask yourself exactly what does it mean to be poor before you start calling someone "poor" like its a bad word or a disgraceful thing. Check you rich (if you are even rich -- I doubt it) egotistical crap at the door.

OK, then you are poor. Own it.

If you consider a HHI of $250K poor, then yes I'm poor. If you consider someone who drives a luxury SUV poor, then yes I'm poor. If you consider someone who lives in a 3000 square foot house poor, then yes I'm poor.

I do not consider myself poor and I suspect none on DCUM (based on prior threads) would consider me poor. I however, am not rich by wealthy standards. I don't own a summer beach home. I don't own a boat. I don't own a home without a mortgage. I don't travel to the Apls or go on month long African Safari vacations. See there is a huge gap between being poor and being rich. It's called MIDDLE CLASS!

There is something deeply wrong with a school who will give a person like this thousands of dollars a year while There are thousands and thousands of children in this city who would TRULY benefit from an opportunity to attend a better school than the one their parents can afford. At this point in the discussion, the blame is on the admissions staff. The admissions staff's at this school needs some serious help,
As further evidenced by the fact that they gave the above idiot FA.

Idiot? LMAO. Takes one to know one. Your entire rant shows just how little you know about the private school world. Are these so called children even applying to these schools? Are these so called children academically qualified to be admitted to these schools? Are these so called children's parents committed to the type of sacrifices one makes when you enroll your child in a priavte school? The play dates, the volunteering, the social dynamics of rich people who will always look at you like you are a charity case? You are plum clueless about it's not as simple as finding underprivileged kids to give an opportunity. Maybe those kids parents do not want to send their kids to private school. But yes, it's the administrations fault who applies and who doesn't apply to their school. No one from my DCs school sought me out. No one did outreach to find me. I, as a parent, wanted this for my DC so I sought it out. They had no control over whether I applied or not. The fact that they were impressed with my child and my family, and decided we are a family they want to be a part of their community is a blessing. A blessing I won't allow you or anyone to make me believe my child is not deserving of. So please take your fake "I care about the poor kids of this city" BS and go sit down somewhere.

I don't think you understand what "so called" means.

[Anonymous]

I think people were trying to point out that people who drive luxury vehicles and own houses bigger than is necessary (3,000 sq ft is excessive) shouldn't be proud about turning around and putting a hand out to other parents at their kids' schools for help paying tuition. We're an FA family and we also are not poor. I would say we're lower middle class, highly educated. Typical of Washingtonians who don't have the higher paying jobs, but have deeply rewarding jobs that do a lot for others for mediocre pay. We live in a house that's well within our means, have a VERY old car and a newer modest car that replaced a very old car. Take driving vacations to grandparents. Have a happy life.

We have some other financial constraints that make us especially qualified for aid and we receive almost 50%. It's a stretch to afford the other portion, but we live pretty frugally and enjoy modest treats as we can. I think we're a great example of what we can bring to a private school -- education, a great kid, a supportive family -- and try to volunteer and be active members of the community as a show of appreciation for the FA and all they do for our DC.

Admissions people absolutely can and should do outreach to find families who think private schools would be well outside their means as a way to increase the economic diversity of the school. This includes people who can pay something but not all. It's true that it's not usually hard to find kids who need a full ride. It's also true that families who can pay some but not all are important as well.

I think a family at $250K with outsized houses and fancy cars is a stretch. I wouldn't normally state such a thing, but it's the way you brag about it that's is unseemly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think people were trying to point out that people who drive luxury vehicles and own houses bigger than is necessary (3,000 sq ft is excessive) shouldn't be proud about turning around and putting a hand out to other parents at their kids' schools for help paying tuition. We're an FA family and we also are not poor. I would say we're lower middle class, highly educated. Typical of Washingtonians who don't have the higher paying jobs, but have deeply rewarding jobs that do a lot for others for mediocre pay. We live in a house that's well within our means, have a VERY old car and a newer modest car that replaced a very old car. Take driving vacations to grandparents. Have a happy life.

We have some other financial constraints that make us especially qualified for aid and we receive almost 50%. It's a stretch to afford the other portion, but we live pretty frugally and enjoy modest treats as we can. I think we're a great example of what we can bring to a private school -- education, a great kid, a supportive family -- and try to volunteer and be active members of the community as a show of appreciation for the FA and all they do for our DC.

Admissions people absolutely can and should do outreach to find families who think private schools would be well outside their means as a way to increase the economic diversity of the school. This includes people who can pay something but not all. It's true that it's not usually hard to find kids who need a full ride. It's also true that families who can pay some but not all are important as well.

I think a family at $250K with outsized houses and fancy cars is a stretch. I wouldn't normally state such a thing, but it's the way you brag about it that's is unseemly.

PP -- your family is the kind of family that any school would be lucky to have!

[Anonymous]

I worked at a school in another state and everyone on aid from 7 grade on had to clean classrooms after s hoo
For 45 min everyday

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I think people were trying to point out that people who drive luxury vehicles and own houses bigger than is necessary (3,000 sq ft is excessive) shouldn't be proud about turning around and putting a hand out to other parents at their kids' schools for help paying tuition. We're an FA family and we also are not poor. I would say we're lower middle class, highly educated. Typical of Washingtonians who don't have the higher paying jobs, but have deeply rewarding jobs that do a lot for others for mediocre pay. We live in a house that's well within our means, have a VERY old car and a newer modest car that replaced a very old car. Take driving vacations to grandparents. Have a happy life.

We have some other financial constraints that make us especially qualified for aid and we receive almost 50%. It's a stretch to afford the other portion, but we live pretty frugally and enjoy modest treats as we can. I think we're a great example of what we can bring to a private school -- education, a great kid, a supportive family -- and try to volunteer and be active members of the community as a show of appreciation for the FA and all they do for our DC.

Admissions people absolutely can and should do outreach to find families who think private schools would be well outside their means as a way to increase the economic diversity of the school. This includes people who can pay something but not all. It's true that it's not usually hard to find kids who need a full ride. It's also true that families who can pay some but not all are important as well.

I think a family at $250K with outsized houses and fancy cars is a stretch. I wouldn't normally state such a thing, but it's the way you brag about it that's is unseemly.

PP -- your family is the kind of family that any school would be lucky to have!

Because she is proud to drive a beat up old car? Oh please, you people are crazy. LOL. There are numerous families at my DC school on FA in a very similar situation as us and none are driving old beat up cars or living in the ghetto. The reason you like families like hers is because it makes the rich feel superior.
I, on the other hand, refuse to walk around making others feel superior or more entitled.

[Anonymous]

Miss 50% aid with the modest new car, it's wonderful to have people like you in the private school community. Admire your dedication to provide the best for your child. That being said, I have the same dedication to my child. Private school is vastly superior to public school and therefore is highly coveted in this area saturated with intelligent parents. However, I don't appreciate the shade at those who earn a little more than you, live in a better home, and drive a nicer car. I receive 25% in aid for my 2 kids and have the 3000 square foot home. It's a townhouse if that makes you feel better. I'm thankful for my aid as it helps us afford the social costs of attending private, which allows the private school experience to be even more beneficial to my kids. I'm not flying off to Europe with my kids for every vacation. I am equally deserving of aid and just because your total finances are different than mine doesn't mean you have the right to decide who's better suited for aid based on the car they drive or the size of their house. The school needs all kinds of families and without aid there would only be the uber wealthy and the poor with nothing in between.

I mean there are some on this board that have argued that people who choose to work in lower paid professions should first try to increase income by changing to higher paying jobs so they can afford private school instead of looking for 50% aid so I wouldn't be so quick to show case your frugality as evidence to support your use of financial aid. Basically people in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.

[Anonymous]

Of course everyone keeps it for themselves! While in some cases it is pretty obvious (type of home, of job,...) Not a problem at all, tough

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I worked at a school in another state and everyone on aid from 7 grade on had to clean classrooms after s hoo
For 45 min everyday

So the rich and the riteous who choose to drive beat up cars would like to shame families on aid as if it's welfare or food stamps. That makes you feel better? I agree with previous posters, it appears the wealthy want to see hard working middle class people grovel just so they can sleep better at night by singling out poor people. Great idea. Please bring suggest this approach at the next sidwell parents night.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:http://www.chabad.org/library/article_cdo/aid/45907/jewish/Eight-Levels-of-Charity.htm

I would offer that some posters on this thread have achieved level [9]: a still even lesser level is when one gives reluctantly, preens about it, and then expects gratitude from the recipients - but only the ones that the giver deems less worthy.

+1 bingo! Love the list.

NP. This thread is bizarre. Do FA recipients really think so little of donors?

I do not think little of donors at all. What I think little of are people who come on this board and do nothing more than berate those of us on FA, accuse of us stealing, being lazy, expecting/wanting something for nothing, etc. etc. etc. It's condescending and simply not true. I am GRATEFUL for the generosity of everyone who chooses to give regardless of their reasons. However, to expect me to be OK with being subjected to their rudeness simply because they have more zeros in their bank account than I do is unacceptable and intolerable. My DC's school costs close to $40K. I pay $25K of that every year, plus I donate to the annual fund. Yet, somehow I am poor, lazy, ungrateful? Seriously? Because I cannot afford to full pay $40K a year that makes me less than? $25K is a lot of money. Heck, that is the annual salary of some. I do not and will not apologize, nor do I feel any shame, for accepting $15K a year in financial aid for my DC to receive what I believe is an outstanding education. The idea that I should is simply mind boggling quite frankly. Again people don't seem to understand what gratitude actually means.

I pay the full $40,000 plus per year for my DD at her private school due to learning issues, otherwise she would be in our very good public school which simply didn't work out due to class size. What I take offense to is that my husband and I sacrifice GREATLY to make this happen and are not eligible for FA. In fact there is a parent at our school who has two children on an almost "full" ride and she and her husband drive late year mercedes and vacation twice a year at nice places. They also live in a 5,000 plus square foot house and are doctors. How do I know this, I have been to her home for multiple play dates between our children so I am well aware of her lifestyle and she of mine. She is well aware of the sacrifices we make, including the fact that we do not take vacations except small local trips. I type this not to complain, I am happy with my choice to make this sacrifice and the smile from my child is satisfaction enough, but really, I often wonder if this parent is missing a sensitivity chip or something. She talks frequently and freely to anyone who will listen about how she plays the system, I encourage you to keep your mouth shut, it reflects poorly on your child if you behave the way this parent and her husband do. Just a thought

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I knew a family at Norwood who boasted about the fact their employers paid 75% of their kids school fees. They mentioned it every single time that we saw them. It got old, fast.

Whoa. Where did they work??

Probably the IMF.