People love saying they’re inclusive of neurodiversity and disability. They’re not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I will vote for politicians who push for money for special ed in all forms. Because I believe that's important. At the same time, I know my limits, and I can't handle kids really deep into the autistic spectrum, I can't change the diaper of a non-baby that's not mine, and I can't handle tantrums and non-verbal kids at a party of 25 kids. Everyone has a bandwidth.

+1.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have close friends whose kids we invited to a lot of our functions (maybe 8-12 times a year). As they got older, and all the other kids learned to behave better, they got more and more out of control. Last party they were stealing snacks in my pantry. I’m generous and absolutely would have put out more food if I knew they were hungry- nope these were snacks for later at home for them. Their pockets and hands were full. The mom just laughs. They also took over every birthday party and wanted to be the center of the show.

Idk they just lack self control but mostly the parents do nothing to help the kids learn social cues. Like no, you don’t get to start eating cupcakes at a birthday party right when you arrive and before we sing happy birthday. At a summer bbq, they filled their entire plate with watermelon. It was at least half an entire watermelon and most of the other kids didn’t get any in the buffet line. I eventually got to where I had my parents and my dh looking out to make sure food wasn’t being raided or they were going through goody bags beforehand. We definitely stepped in and said no nonstop, which I typically wouldn’t do with other kids (because I mostly never need to…)

I feel for the parents and the kids but I can’t deal with the combo of gentle parenting + neurodivergent kids. I put them in the same category as the girl who punched my dd and broke her nose and had a burn book in second grade. That girl also doesn’t get invited since so many little girls were harmed.

That's not "gentle parenting". That's self centered while parenting

Agree, that’s negligence and No Parenting. Or disciplining or parenting or consequences.

Pp here. They don’t believe in saying no. I do think the parents might be ND too.

[Anonymous]

I made a push to hire neurodivergent people at my company.

Within a month, they were disappearing for days at a time saying they needed a “mental health break”, saying they couldn’t do tasks that were in their job description (nothing crazy, literally just talking on the phone).

When I explained we need to do those things and come to work to meet deadlines otherwise we lose clients, I can’t pay their salaries, and go out of business, one said “I’m so tired of employers trying to make money off of me”.

Luckily when I had the “you need to do these tasks and come to work” conversation, they all quit.

Obviously I can’t discriminate but the very first thing I do with new hires now is put them on the most cognitively demanding tasks first. It sorts out pretty quickly who can handle it and who can’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I feel for the parents and the kids but I can’t deal with the combo of gentle parenting + neurodivergent kids.

ND or not, I can't stand the whole "gentle parenting" movement. It's called a lack of discipline. Frequently, it means I'm going to have to discipline someone else's poorly-behaved brat child because they didn't want to do the work, and the end result is often someone claiming victim status (like OP) when the reality is that they're the root cause of the problem.

Over it completely. Discipline your kids!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m putting this in the relationship forum and not the Kids with Special Needs forum because you need to hear this. Most parents on the other forum already know the following to be the case.

I’m absolutely sick of people in this area, that vote left and love to talk about the benefits of D&I, say that they’re inclusive of neurodivergent individuals. They’re not. They and their children can’t handle literally anything that’s different. There’s invitations for playdates. No reciprocated family invites. Nothing.

You’re free to not invite my child and me on your outings. But really, don’t tow the D&I line and while you’re at it, may as well vote for conservatives and try to save some of your tax dollars. Because everything you think you believe and stand for is just value signaling.

What exactly happened OP?

I can assure you that not getting invited into other people’s homes in busy May or a kid not invited to something is happening ALL THE TIME, all over the world. You can’t force playdates.

Where do you live exactly?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:We have close friends whose kids we invited to a lot of our functions (maybe 8-12 times a year). As they got older, and all the other kids learned to behave better, they got more and more out of control. Last party they were stealing snacks in my pantry. I’m generous and absolutely would have put out more food if I knew they were hungry- nope these were snacks for later at home for them. Their pockets and hands were full. The mom just laughs. They also took over every birthday party and wanted to be the center of the show.

Idk they just lack self control but mostly the parents do nothing to help the kids learn social cues. Like no, you don’t get to start eating cupcakes at a birthday party right when you arrive and before we sing happy birthday. At a summer bbq, they filled their entire plate with watermelon. It was at least half an entire watermelon and most of the other kids didn’t get any in the buffet line. I eventually got to where I had my parents and my dh looking out to make sure food wasn’t being raided or they were going through goody bags beforehand. We definitely stepped in and said no nonstop, which I typically wouldn’t do with other kids (because I mostly never need to…)

I feel for the parents and the kids but I can’t deal with the combo of gentle parenting + neurodivergent kids. I put them in the same category as the girl who punched my dd and broke her nose and had a burn book in second grade. That girl also doesn’t get invited since so many little girls were harmed.

That's not "gentle parenting". That's self centered while parenting

Agree, that’s negligence and No Parenting. Or disciplining or parenting or consequences.

Pp here. They don’t believe in saying no. I do think the parents might be ND too.

Could be, they don’t have a clue how to parent.

My ND spouse is very lenient and spoiling (like it’s his parenting love language).

Unf 99% of the time he under-reacts to everything, and then 1% of the time he blows up when it’s clearly his fault and he tries to blame the kids or someone else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I made a push to hire neurodivergent people at my company.

Within a month, they were disappearing for days at a time saying they needed a “mental health break”, saying they couldn’t do tasks that were in their job description (nothing crazy, literally just talking on the phone).

When I explained we need to do those things and come to work to meet deadlines otherwise we lose clients, I can’t pay their salaries, and go out of business, one said “I’m so tired of employers trying to make money off of me”.

Luckily when I had the “you need to do these tasks and come to work” conversation, they all quit.

Obviously I can’t discriminate but the very first thing I do with new hires now is put them on the most cognitively demanding tasks first. It sorts out pretty quickly who can handle it and who can’t.

That’s weird and a terrible attitude to have. I’m not sure it’s ND led though, it seems some coddled, DEI, lack of coping skills language talk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:It’s DEI.

I think you need to work this out with a therapist.

The E stands for equity and it’s more a function of making sure there’s equal pay in the workplace. Not really the point the post is trying to make which is children being included.

Equity is important in school because some kids get an hour of reading lesson and some people get an hour and a half because that’s what they need. That is equity.

Equity would be giving everyone an hour and a half whether they need it or not.

No that is equality. Equity is giving everyone what they need to be on the same level. Equality is giving everyone the same resources.

So dumb 2/3s of everyone down whilst focusing only on the bottom third. Got it. Equity.

And I suppose your little crotchdumps are in the top third. Oh, woe is you.

Also, you POS, my ASD child is wicked smart and doesn’t need anything dumbed down for her. Nor does she have tantrums or “accidents”. The only thing she doesn’t get is unkind people. She’s better than you in literally every way.

Way to prove a totally different point (yours unhinged & cursing) and disprove your actual new point (how kind you are). Well done!

And not even respond to the post about education equity and equality. Well done again PP!

Again, loser. I NEVER said I was kind.

Wow. I’m one of the order autism moms posting here, but OP, that’s really not okay.