Where can I meet a 38+ guy that I’d actually be into dating?

[Anonymous]

The problem is, the men who will pass all of your demanding filters have increasingly demanding filters of their own. They are probably looking for a woman that is either more laid back / less demanding, or one that doesn't have children

[Anonymous]

You have high standards and like PP said, the men you are interested will have them too, and that might include not dating a woman with children. In your case, I'd give a second chance to the men thrown off by the idea of kids. Just because they are surprised or haven't dated a woman with kids before doesn't mean you should write them off. Go on a second date and see if there are other red flags of immaturity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The problem is, the men who will pass all of your demanding filters have increasingly demanding filters of their own. They are probably looking for a woman that is either more laid back / less demanding, or one that doesn't have children

no, no, there are plenty of mature guys who don't want kids, clear 250k post child support, and want to date a mid 30s divorcee with kids

[Anonymous]

I'm a unicorn, trust fund, high income, good looking, socially savvy......and acknowledge that it takes much longer to find another unicorn.

This surprises you, OP?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you don’t need to be supported, your partner does not need to make 250k. This sounds like more like you are not attracted to men who make less money than you.

NP. Sounds like you should not be cheap and using a site that ‘regular’ folks use.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP I don’t think there’s *anything* wrong with your income target, and people who think men making $250k+ are rolling in smoking hot options are delusional.

I agree you’re most likely to meet nice boyfriends in your social circle though, and they will be other recent divorcés.

You forgot to add the qualifier: “in this area.”

A man making more than $250k/ yr is a real catch in some parts of the country.

Sure or another high COL place.

[Anonymous]

it is normal for a successful, high earning woman to expect her partner to earn as well or better the she does.

It is apparently also normal for that woman to be unable to land such a man, since OP is asking where they are hiding.

Why would any woman accept, let alone respect, a low income guy?

OP's cutoff is $250K / year. She isn't excluding low income men; she is excluding 95% of all men in this area.

[Anonymous]

This isn't real, right?



I mean...this isn't real, guys, right???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not the Op but I have similar standards. The issue when you are a financially successful woman is that I want an equal. If I want to go to the Bahamas for the long weekend. I want my partner to be able to do the same. If I want to go to NYC for the weekend, again I want someone to do those things with. I don’t expect anyone to pay for me and I don’t want to pay for anyone else. If you can’t afford to go, I’m still going. Guys I’ve dated have gotten pissy that I’m not willing to pay their way.

I don’t want anymore kids either. That requirement gets easier to meet as you get older. OP, I didn’t date anyone for the last 7 yrs. I focused on my kids and my career. I’m 50 now. I recently started dating a man with 2 grown, out of college kids. He’s financially secure, doesn’t want more kids, and is 6’4. They’re out there but you may have to wait.

Don’t lower your standards but also don’t expect to strike gold right away. While you wait, focus on you and your kids.

DP.

Agree - it is normal for a successful, high earning woman to expect her partner to earn as well or better the she does.

Why would any woman accept, let alone respect, a low income guy?

Because a person’s worth as an individual isn’t predicated on their income. My three year old understands this.

[Anonymous]

I can respect their worth as an individual while simultaneously acknowledging their worth to me, as a partner.

A partner who I have to help support financially so that they can keep up with my lifestyle is not a valuable asset to me as a partner, as I am not looking to marry. I am looking to date and travel and share half a life (my non kid life) with a partner. If they cannot do that due to financial limitations, they will be less valuable to me as a partner, if not less intrinsically valuable as a human.

[Anonymous]

Gosh what happened to finding a guy who

has a great sense of humor
loves the outdoors
is great with kids
can cook

all this income bracket crap and height business makes me think you're completely unrealistic and highly superficial.

I can see why you're divorced, honestly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Gosh what happened to finding a guy who

has a great sense of humor
loves the outdoors
is great with kids
can cook

all this income bracket crap and height business makes me think you're completely unrealistic and highly superficial.

I can see why you're divorced, honestly.

What’s so great about a guy who “loves the outdoors” when you live in DC?!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can respect their worth as an individual while simultaneously acknowledging their worth to me, as a partner.

A partner who I have to help support financially so that they can keep up with my lifestyle is not a valuable asset to me as a partner, as I am not looking to marry. I am looking to date and travel and share half a life (my non kid life) with a partner. If they cannot do that due to financial limitations, they will be less valuable to me as a partner, if not less intrinsically valuable as a human.

So do you respect them or not?

[Anonymous]

Can definitely see why you are divorced OP. You sound absurdly high maintenance. Who wants to deal with all that, even before you get to the kid complications

[Anonymous]

OP - your kids are young and you already have a divorce to deal with. Therapy for all and some self reflection and work is in order. Dating now is not a good idea - you will just replace one bad decision/husband with another. Grow up and learn about yourself instead of checking all the boxes in your head.