Husband coming home at night after c section

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You will be fine! Second set of hands is a luxury not a necessity. My DH had to be home with our other two kids for my last c-section. The nurses are aware of who is solo and will be there to assist with getting the baby out of the bassinet for you. Are you at a hospital with a nursery?

OP here. There is no nursery but I am hoping we'll be fine too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Someone should be with you overnight at least the first night. You'll have a catheter and will need help with the baby.

Just saw he'll be there night one, good! Do you have a friend or family member who would be able to stay with you after?

OP here. I do but they are not allowed b/c of covid. One support person, no switching out. So while my husband can come and go once per day, he can't trade with anyone. My mother would love to come and be with me, and she isn't physically capable of caring for our older kids but unless my husband wants to miss the actual birth, she can't come.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG, you'll be fine. There are nurses to take care of you My husband went home after my second c-section because we have a younger child and no family to help. I was fine. In fact, I slept better after my second c-section without him there than I did after my first.

Let him go home and rest, send the baby to the nursery. Tell the nurse to wake you up when the baby is hungry. If you can't send the baby to the nursery, just make sure you hit the call button as soon as the baby gets fussy so that they can come hand you the baby to nurse. It's not hard.

Thanks. There is no nursery but I am sure they can bring me the baby. I'd like the backup option of the nursery but I am not sure I would sleep better alone. I am hoping to get a nurse eager to hand me the baby multiple times.

[Anonymous]

I have 4 kids and my husband didn’t stay after any of the c-sections. I wanted him to get a good night of sleep with the first and for the others wanted him home with the other kids. It’s truly a non-issue.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG, you'll be fine. There are nurses to take care of you My husband went home after my second c-section because we have a younger child and no family to help. I was fine. In fact, I slept better after my second c-section without him there than I did after my first.

Let him go home and rest, send the baby to the nursery. Tell the nurse to wake you up when the baby is hungry. If you can't send the baby to the nursery, just make sure you hit the call button as soon as the baby gets fussy so that they can come hand you the baby to nurse. It's not hard.

Depends on where you deliver. No one helped me at GW besides to give me meds (often late). Really no one did anything for me. I was in a room by myself with the baby. I asked for help and was treated like I asked for a full body massage.

[Anonymous]

Ask the hospital what their policy is about unaccompanied c-section mothers and the baby the first night. In my day, they had to have a nursery and if you were alone, they’d take the baby there. That’s what I did. It was a very good thing. Hospital “baby friendly” policies are garbage, and it’s just cost cutting for them. Can you move to a hospital that has one?

[Anonymous]

People have poor reading comprehension- there is no nursery. I’d recommend just in case have a backup plan.

[Anonymous]

Physically maybe , for me I needed the emotional support more because baby had jaundice and other issues and I was a mess.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OMG, you'll be fine. There are nurses to take care of you My husband went home after my second c-section because we have a younger child and no family to help. I was fine. In fact, I slept better after my second c-section without him there than I did after my first.

Let him go home and rest, send the baby to the nursery. Tell the nurse to wake you up when the baby is hungry. If you can't send the baby to the nursery, just make sure you hit the call button as soon as the baby gets fussy so that they can come hand you the baby to nurse. It's not hard.

I'd agree with you except OP said there is no newborn nursery at the hospital.

I had 2 c sections and slept SO MUCH BETTER without my loud ass snoring husband on the couch in the room. But, there was a nursery for the baby, and i didn't even have them bring me the baby overnight, i just slept. And did skin to skin/ breastfeeding all day long from 8am-10pm. It was glorious- take percocet, lay in bed watching TV, cuddling my infant with no distractions.

But without a nursery overnight I dunno.

[Anonymous]

With my first, DH stayed the whole time and I really wanted a breather! His help was nice, but the room felt crowded. With my second, he didn’t stay overnight at all. I sent the baby to the nursery at nighttime and they bottle-fed him. He survived just fine, I was able to get some sleep and recover and DH was able to stay with our older child.

[Anonymous]

Read the OP people! There isn’t a nursery. I would not have survived without someone staying with me after my 3 C sections. I was in a lot of pain and getting out of bed every 2 hours to change the baby’s diaper, then climbing back up into the bed carrying the baby to nurse was very difficult. With baby #3, the nurses kept returning her to us, saying her crying kept waking the other babies. I was exhausted and could not imagine doing that by myself for 3-4 nights.

[Anonymous]

I can’t believe we as a society allowed them to phase out nurseries. Truly absurd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG, you'll be fine. There are nurses to take care of you My husband went home after my second c-section because we have a younger child and no family to help. I was fine. In fact, I slept better after my second c-section without him there than I did after my first.

Let him go home and rest, send the baby to the nursery. Tell the nurse to wake you up when the baby is hungry. If you can't send the baby to the nursery, just make sure you hit the call button as soon as the baby gets fussy so that they can come hand you the baby to nurse. It's not hard.

Depends on where you deliver. No one helped me at GW besides to give me meds (often late). Really no one did anything for me. I was in a room by myself with the baby. I asked for help and was treated like I asked for a full body massage.

Agree. I had a normal vaginal birth, my husband went home to be with our older child, and it was awful, awful, awful. My baby was a hungry screamer, I was completely incontinent and emptied my bladder the second I stood up to get the baby, and the nurses were unresponsive.

My strongest memory of her birth is holding my screaming baby while grabbing paper towels from the dispenser and using my feet to move them around the floor and sop up my urine. Oh, and then when I put the baby back in the bassinet to change out of my wet things, I emerged from the bathroom to find the nurse had finally come and she dressed me down for "leaving my baby to cry" while I was in there. (Baby had quieted when I put her down but as I cleaned myself up, I could hear her start to cry, louder and louder, and was frantically trying to finish and get back to her.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can’t believe we as a society allowed them to phase out nurseries. Truly absurd.

I had to check the date to see if I had written this. Concur that it is insane, if not incredibly misogynistic. Hours of labor or major medical procedure, here take care of a newborn on your own. And we wonder why we have poor maternal-fetal outcomes in this country. It’s absolutely insane.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG, you'll be fine. There are nurses to take care of you My husband went home after my second c-section because we have a younger child and no family to help. I was fine. In fact, I slept better after my second c-section without him there than I did after my first.

Let him go home and rest, send the baby to the nursery. Tell the nurse to wake you up when the baby is hungry. If you can't send the baby to the nursery, just make sure you hit the call button as soon as the baby gets fussy so that they can come hand you the baby to nurse. It's not hard.

Depends on where you deliver. No one helped me at GW besides to give me meds (often late). Really no one did anything for me. I was in a room by myself with the baby. I asked for help and was treated like I asked for a full body massage.

+1
Holy Cross nurses helped a tiny bit but WHC did zip. And reprimanded me for holding my baby while I slept-both of my babies were screamers anytime they were put in the bassinet.