Upspeak and vocal fry on work conference calls

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I can't stand it. It makes the speaker sound like a confused airhead or stoned teenager.

Most generations have some sort of speech pattern and slang they use during their teen years but most elminate it once they matured and entered the working world.

Not so anymore, I'm afraid. And you can't "say something" to them about it lest you be accused of being biased, cruel and maybe even discriminatory.

You've just revealed your own bias and cruelty. Don't be so sanctimonious about the maturity and professionalism of oldies.

For generations, men dominated the workforce and could openly mistreat women. Was it mature for one of my older bosses to sexually harass me on a regular basis?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't hear it in anyone over the age of about 28. It's actively harming careers. As a man I can't speak up because it sounds sexist but hopefully some of the older millenial and gen x women will say something.

I'm a millennial woman and I do have something to say about this.

You know what's harming our careers? Sexist mouth-breathing men like you who look for any reason to dismiss the intellect of a female colleague.

If you think vocal fry is annoying, I can guarantee you also sound like a total idiot in meetings.

Got news for you. How you speak is indicative of how much RESPECT you have for the listeners.

For example, if it is your job to impart serious news to someone (a family, a client) do you really want to be growling at distraught people? Or giving them factual information while your voice sounds like you are unsure and confused and everything is posed as a upspeak question?

Got news for you, asshole. Your mansplaining attitude is far more disrespectful than a woman's voice. We're not growing animals. We're humans.

[Anonymous]

It no more suggests the speaker is an airhead than an Oxbridge English accent suggests the speaker is intelligent.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There’s no reason it should harm careers except misogyny.

Upspeak makes you sound uncertain. That’s not misogyny. Women should unlearn it stay and also get rid of the vocal fry, which may also have its roots in trying to temper ones assertiveness.

— very liberal female

You're not so "liberal" if you think women ought to adapt to the standards that men have created in the workforce in order to keep women down.

Look up the numerous studies on how upspeak and uncertainty can actually move forward difficult conversations because not everyone in the room has to sound like a know-it-all.

[Anonymous]

Get over it.

[Anonymous]

Different man. If I'm working with a group of women on a project, I might switch to upspeak occasionally, just as I might speak a foreign language to colleagues abroad. I care too much about my vocal chords to do verbal fry.

[Anonymous]

What are appropriate situations for uptalk?
It’s great to use uptalk when you want to make others feel safe in mostly one-on-one situations. For example, when you give feedback to a boss, a coworker, or a direct report and you don’t want them to freak out and shut off because of your comments.

It’s important not to overuse uptalk even in the above situations. Utilize it just enough to reduce the resistance of others.

When is it not appropriate to uptalk?
You should avoid uptalking in almost all situations except in the above example of giving one-on-one feedback. Otherwise, your credibility might be at risk.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It KILLS me. Drives me nuts. And it's only the Americans who do it.

I hate this too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What are appropriate situations for uptalk?
It’s great to use uptalk when you want to make others feel safe in mostly one-on-one situations. For example, when you give feedback to a boss, a coworker, or a direct report and you don’t want them to freak out and shut off because of your comments.

It’s important not to overuse uptalk even in the above situations. Utilize it just enough to reduce the resistance of others.

When is it not appropriate to uptalk?
You should avoid uptalking in almost all situations except in the above example of giving one-on-one feedback. Otherwise, your credibility might be at risk.

Says who? Doesn't the research suggest that uptalk among colleagues can help keep a conversation flowing, in that the participants are signalling that they remain open to ideas and that a matter has not yet been settled? Of course, if one is making a presentation and presenting findings, that wouldn't necessarily be the best time to employ upspeak. But I'm not sure it's only valid in one-on-one settings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't hear it in anyone over the age of about 28. It's actively harming careers. As a man I can't speak up because it sounds sexist but hopefully some of the older millenial and gen x women will say something.

I'm a millennial woman and I do have something to say about this.

You know what's harming our careers? Sexist mouth-breathing men like you who look for any reason to dismiss the intellect of a female colleague.

If you think vocal fry is annoying, I can guarantee you also sound like a total idiot in meetings.

Sorry frog voice. I’m a Gen X woman and you’re the one with the vocal problem. You guys subsconciously think that it makes you sound intelligent and perhaps older, but it’s the opposite.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What are appropriate situations for uptalk?
It’s great to use uptalk when you want to make others feel safe in mostly one-on-one situations. For example, when you give feedback to a boss, a coworker, or a direct report and you don’t want them to freak out and shut off because of your comments.

It’s important not to overuse uptalk even in the above situations. Utilize it just enough to reduce the resistance of others.

When is it not appropriate to uptalk?
You should avoid uptalking in almost all situations except in the above example of giving one-on-one feedback. Otherwise, your credibility might be at risk.

I think you need to step back and see how condescending you sound. Do you really think you're helping women realize when their credibility might be at risk?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't hear it in anyone over the age of about 28. It's actively harming careers. As a man I can't speak up because it sounds sexist but hopefully some of the older millenial and gen x women will say something.

I'm a millennial woman and I do have something to say about this.

You know what's harming our careers? Sexist mouth-breathing men like you who look for any reason to dismiss the intellect of a female colleague.

If you think vocal fry is annoying, I can guarantee you also sound like a total idiot in meetings.

Sorry frog voice. I’m a Gen X woman and you’re the one with the vocal problem. You guys subsconciously think that it makes you sound intelligent and perhaps older, but it’s the opposite.

Well it's hard to take anyone seriously when they say "frog voice" and "you guys." Maybe you think you sound clever, but it's the opposite.

[Anonymous]

I have a male in my office that does it.

He also replies to emails that don't require a reply with elaborate "thank yous" and "have a wonderful day" type stuff in them.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There’s no reason it should harm careers except misogyny.

I'd agree with this except that it seems to be a uniquely American phenomenon. If you work in a global company, you don't encounter this speech pattern, which telegraphs hesitancy and uncertainty.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don't hear it in anyone over the age of about 28. It's actively harming careers. As a man I can't speak up because it sounds sexist but hopefully some of the older millenial and gen x women will say something.

I'm a millennial woman and I do have something to say about this.

You know what's harming our careers? Sexist mouth-breathing men like you who look for any reason to dismiss the intellect of a female colleague.

If you think vocal fry is annoying, I can guarantee you also sound like a total idiot in meetings.

Sorry frog voice. I’m a Gen X woman and you’re the one with the vocal problem. You guys subsconciously think that it makes you sound intelligent and perhaps older, but it’s the opposite.

+1 Another Gen X woman who thinks you sound dumb, PP.