Your dogs are NOT members of the family

[Anonymous]

How bizarre. I have lots of relatives who have dogs and none of them bring their dogs to other people’s houses. You already have a dog and will be hosting the whole extended family and people are indignant that they aren’t allowed to add 4 other dogs (including large breeds) to the mix? Your aunt thinks it’s more reasonable for her dog to be inside your house during a family celebration than it is for your niece to be inside? These people are nuts. Don’t give an inch.

[Anonymous]

Wait, all these people insist on bringing pets to a single party? Or are they all staying with you? And how many people could you possibly host?

I am confused.

[Anonymous]

Regrdless of how people treat their own dogs, this has nothing to do with where dogs are welcome and allowed.
Just because a dog is consider by someone a family it does not mean that this person should bring it to the temple.. church .. movie theater.. etc..

[Anonymous]

Cancel the event OP and tell the dog crazies they can host. Seriously.

[Anonymous]

In our family, everyone assumes they can bring their dogs, because we have a dog, and we joke that the dogs are all cousins.

But if one of the kids were allergic, we'd leave the dogs home (although all our dogs have hair, not fur).

[Anonymous]

My cats and dog are family, but I have no problem boarding the dog and hiring a cat sitter. Your family members are weird. If your aunt showed up to my house and demanded her dog be allowed in since he’s an emotional support animal, I would laugh and spray a hose at her till she got off my property ?

[Anonymous]

You have a high number of nuts in your family.

[Anonymous]

My dog is my family member.

Your house, your rules.

They are ridiculous. If you don't want dogs you don't have to host them. And the "legally obligated to allow the dog" GMAFB

[Anonymous]

Tell your MIL who wants to keep peace to host and make sure your DH has your back 100% otherwise the haters will change the convo to On focused on the “crazy mean DIL”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have a high number of nuts in your family.

+1 bajillion.

Unless I misread it, your aunt insists on bringing her dog and keep your niece outside AT ALL TIMES?
You should ask if you could borrow a dog house to keep your niece in while the dog enjoys his time indoors.

[Anonymous]

OP congrats!! You discovered the loophole that will get you out of hosting for the rest of your married life! Whoop!

[Anonymous]

Dear Smith Family,

We are looking forward to the BBQ. We hope this will be a fun and relaxing day for all of our family.

As you know, Kaylee is severely allergic to dogs. As the hosts, we've gone out of our way to thoroughly clean our house and board our own dog. We are dog lovers, but we love Kaylee and family even more.

There will be NO DOGS at this party. If that changes your RSVP, we understand. Anyone trying to bring their dog the day of will be politely asked to leave. This is not changing.

We look forward to seeing those of you who can make it.

Stu, Rachel and family

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agreed to host an upcoming extended in-law family get together at our house. Its a backyard party with grilling to celebrate five summer birthdays. Easy right.

My niece is very allergic to dogs. When SIL/BIL and their family visit I board my dog and vacuum the entire house, wash down the baseboards, dust off everything, change the air filters, and keep all the windows open. We have hardwoods and no fabric window coverings so it works and SIL is very appreciative. At other family events, several family members bring their dogs and it is very difficult for my niece. SIL is thrilled it is at our house and thanked me for sending our dog to doggie daycare for the day etc.

In the invitation I included that we would be boarding our dog and not having dogs at this event. Now the relatives who always bring their dogs are insisting that they get to bring their dogs. My cousin's wife simply responded to the email invitation with including her dog's name on the RSVP. I wrote to her telling her we wouldn't be hosting dogs and she is now mortally offended and whiny. She whined that it was too much of hardship to board her dog and that he has been welcome at other family events. At the same time, a different cousin writes to me begging me not to let that cousin's dog come to our house or they will not be going. The dog is a shepherd, husky, retriever mix that is big, not well trained, jumpy and nips. It jumped scratched and nipped her kid at one of the last events and her kids are afraid of it. I let her know that I told the other cousin not to bring the dog. She is happy but the other cousin is mad sending snotty notes.

The next dog owner is an aunt. She has informed me that she is bringing her dog. She next informs me that my allergic niece can simply stay outside because her dog is an indoor only dog and never sets foot outside. She will be bringing a playpen and pee pads to set up in her home just like she does at other events. She attached her what I'm sure is fake certificate that her dog is an emotional support animal so legally I can not bar her dog access to my home. I responded absolutely not. If she can not be away from her dog then she'll just have to miss this event.

Now the third dog owner is writing to me. He expects to bring his two huge dogs. He has apparently paired up with the cousin and was trying to explain to me that her dog will behave better with his dogs present due to pack behavior. I said no.

The three of them have now combined forces and sent an email to everyone saying how sad it is that some family members are being excluded from this event. They are responding back and forth agreeing with each other and going on how animals are family members too. I am getting email sent just to me not to the whole group from several others encouraging me not to give in and that they hate those dogs. Previous hosts are hoping this sticks because one of the dogs seems to have a pattern of pooping on outdoor rugs. None of them are brave enough to respond to all so the email invitation thread appears to be a dogs can come petition from the dog owners.

MIL is thinking that we should give in to keep the peace. DH and I now never want to see any of these dogs or their owners again. Another aunt who has a cat (and is not pushing to bring the cat) has warned me that one of them will show up with the dog anyway and we will have to be prepared to turn them away at the door. She thinks we might want to cancel and just say someone is sick. I'm not going to cancel and have no problem telling anyone who shows up with a dog that they can't come in.

Do the people in your extended family view their dogs as entitled to attend everything? Are these people just nuts?

You are awesome, OP. And as a dog owner, doubly so. Stick to your guns. Not everyone is a dog fan, and some of us are highly allergic to the point where we don't go bc of cats/dogs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How bizarre. I have lots of relatives who have dogs and none of them bring their dogs to other people’s houses. You already have a dog and will be hosting the whole extended family and people are indignant that they aren’t allowed to add 4 other dogs (including large breeds) to the mix? Your aunt thinks it’s more reasonable for her dog to be inside your house during a family celebration than it is for your niece to be inside? These people are nuts. Don’t give an inch.

Yeah, if someone brought a pet, it would have to stay outside at our place.

[Anonymous]

OP congrats!! You discovered the loophole that will get you out of hosting for the rest of your married life! Whoop!

OP its probably bad but that is EXACTLY what is going through my head. Woo hoo for us!! I'm already getting labeled as bitchy by the dog faction because I am just bluntly saying no and not engaging them in any debate about it. It would probably be more diplomatic to lay it all on the allergic niece but we don't want those dogs in our house now anyway. Especially now after finding out that one will poop on the outdoor rug and the other is going to pee inside. Our dog is pretty mellow but I don't see him reacting well to coming home with his house and yard smelling like dog poo and pee. I drink heavily at family events even though I rarely drink. I hadn't noticed the apparent chaos these dogs cause at all the events.

Its about 40 people. MIL and SIL's family is staying with us for the weekend. The others are just driving in for the afternoon/evening or staying with other relatives that live closer. The dog faction makes up about 8 people if you include their kids and spouses. It will be fine with 32 instead of 40, IMO.

The cousin with the nippy dog is being the bitchiest. She told me that her dog has separation anxiety. If she leaves him he will destroy things in her house and once almost ate through her bathroom wall. She wanted to know if we will be prepped to compensate her for damage if that happens. I said absolutely not, her problem not ours. The aunt with the indoor dog is being the most entitled. She just can't fathom what has gotten into me not allowing her fur child. The other guy who I honestly am not even sure how he fits into this extended group is just a pompous idiot with all his let me educate you about dogs.