Is there a legit reason for this sketchy behavior

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:He has a wife and he took you to an Airbnb


Bingo!
Anonymous
Not wife but serious girlfriend who might live there most of the time.

Why would you date someone that long without seeing where he lives? Something is WEIRD here.

Anonymous
Google his address and see if you discover anything.

If nothing comes up, talk to him about how you feel and see if you’ll get invited over more.

I think it’ll be obvious soon if you should continue.
Anonymous
People who own dogs don't hide them away for nine months successfully. On what grounds? The dog is vicious? Doesn't like strangers? Then who is able to walk the dog while he's off with you away from his place?

Something about this situation smells to high heaven.

Anonymous
Keep digging. Have you met co-workers, friends or family members?
Anonymous
It’s 2019, and people are still this desperate and gullible?

Wow.
Anonymous
Too many things don’t add up here. A flood?
Anonymous
Maybe it really was a dump and it took him that long to renovate or professional cleaners?

Not sure I'd jump to "has a wife". FWBs maybe. Only you would know by how much time he devotes to your relationship. If you spend time with him often, he texts/talks everyday, overnights at your place...then stay aware and see how things progress. Being suspicious and calling him out would be odd. Let it play out for a bit. 9 months to a guy is different than 9 months to a woman, who typically drops the, where is this going" hint.
Anonymous
And he can’t friend you on Facebook because he just doesn’t believe in social media...right?
Anonymous
You need to flat out directly ask him. "Don, it's been really weird to me how reluctant you've been to invite me to your place. What's up with that?"

If he's evasive or defensive with his answer, I think it tells you what you need to know.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Even if he’s not hiding another woman, you don’t really want to be with someone that secretive or who freaks out that much over minor damage.


+1
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:You need to flat out directly ask him. "Don, it's been really weird to me how reluctant you've been to invite me to your place. What's up with that?"

If he's evasive or defensive with his answer, I think it tells you what you need to know.


I agree that you need to have a direct conversation. OP, when you think back on the past 9 months do you see any other red flags: have you met his friends and family? Have you ever gone out in his neighborhood? Does he have an odd schedule for the times he can see you-either very restricted or last minute? Are you friends on social media? Will he go out with you in a wide range of public places? Can you meet him at his work? Hopefully, he just has one weird issue, but I would be very curious at this point.
Anonymous
I would also ask your sister what makes her suspicious of his behavior-maybe she has picked up on additional inconsistencies that you haven't notice yet.
Anonymous
Can the apartment be seen from the street? Ask a friend to do some investigative work.
Anonymous
Or maybe like he said he has some anxiety about his place.

I would be hard to make an airbnb look and feel like his personal home as his personal effects wouldn't be there. Airbnbs are either someone's personal home they use (and you can see all their personal effects) or they are staged / basic furniture and necessities with no personal effects.

I don't jump to always assuming the worst about everyone. I don't want others to do that about me.
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