Why does my friend get constant attention from rich guys?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, those 2 pics represent the same style in different settings. You are not seeing yourself clearly.

Op here. I don’t dress too differently from my friend. She is more polished and puts more effort into her looks. She’ll never leave the house without hair and makeup. I often go to brunch in no makeup and natural hair.

I don’t understand how I’m attracting the hipsters and underachievers. I am well spoken, a lot more “sophisticated” than said friend in that I read a lot and am a policy wonk. She is simply...very pretty and into makeup and social climbing.

So...you think preppy/trust fund guys like the "sophisticated"/policy wonk style over the very pretty makeup/social climbing style? Sorry...for those guys, intellectual ability is just an add-on and not a requirement.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She is like catnip for them. Everyone who shows interest in her is preppy and a trust funder. The kinds of guys who go to galas. She isn’t from that background at all but I guess she styles herself a certain way. Sleek straight hair, pearl earrings. Big shiny white smile. She is also really pretty.

I always get hit on by...guys who are hipsters, nerds and a lot more laid back. The jeans and t shirt types.

Um, she is pretty, probably has great boobs and probably flirts and exudes sexuality. Men are not very complicated.

[Anonymous]

Because she’s prettier and more polished than you, and that’s what they’re used to.

[Anonymous]

I find it amusing you are accusing her of social climbing when it sounds like that’s what your goal is. So fix your hair, put on some damn makeup, and be prepared to be bored by Skip and Trip for the next 40 years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, those 2 pics represent the same style in different settings. You are not seeing yourself clearly.

Op here. I don’t dress too differently from my friend. She is more polished and puts more effort into her looks. She’ll never leave the house without hair and makeup. I often go to brunch in no makeup and natural hair.

I don’t understand how I’m attracting the hipsters and underachievers. I am well spoken, a lot more “sophisticated” than said friend in that I read a lot and am a policy wonk. She is simply...very pretty and into makeup and social climbing.

You answered yourself here. She is very pretty and outwardly sophisticated. Not many men care about you being a policy wonk-its pretty tiresome actually and I am saying this as a fellow nerd girl.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, those 2 pics represent the same style in different settings. You are not seeing yourself clearly.

Op here. I don’t dress too differently from my friend. She is more polished and puts more effort into her looks. She’ll never leave the house without hair and makeup. I often go to brunch in no makeup and natural hair.

I don’t understand how I’m attracting the hipsters and underachievers. I am well spoken, a lot more “sophisticated” than said friend in that I read a lot and am a policy wonk. She is simply...very pretty and into makeup and social climbing.

You answered yourself here. She is very pretty and outwardly sophisticated. Not many men care about you being a policy wonk-its pretty tiresome actually and I am saying this as a fellow nerd girl.

Op here. Wow. I didn’t realize someone can appear to be sophisticated by how she dresses/ styles herself. I thought that was all superficial/not important.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look online, post a pic of "her style" and post a pic of "your style".

That’s what my friend dresses /looks like. Although she’s not rich so nothing designer. Just super sleek hair and subtle but well put together makeup.

I’m in investment banking, not a trust funder, so I might not be the demographic you’re talking about. Under 40, happily married for 10 years, never had a problem dating when I was single. I fully acknowledge that my physical appearance could be picked apart by internet strangers.

First picture is attractive to me and second picture would be of no interest. I am not looking to offend you, but my immediate gut reaction was: first picture has her sh!t together, second woman looks goofy to me (I think it’s the huge scarf and the shade of lipstick, but I don’t know). Again, not trying to be offensive, these are just my personal tastes and there is no reason for you to cater to me or anyone else.

The “polish” issue you mentioned is probably it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP, those 2 pics represent the same style in different settings. You are not seeing yourself clearly.

Op here. I don’t dress too differently from my friend. She is more polished and puts more effort into her looks. She’ll never leave the house without hair and makeup. I often go to brunch in no makeup and natural hair.

I don’t understand how I’m attracting the hipsters and underachievers. I am well spoken, a lot more “sophisticated” than said friend in that I read a lot and am a policy wonk. She is simply...very pretty and into makeup and social climbing.

You answered yourself here. She is very pretty and outwardly sophisticated. Not many men care about you being a policy wonk-its pretty tiresome actually and I am saying this as a fellow nerd girl.

Op here. Wow. I didn’t realize someone can appear to be sophisticated by how she dresses/ styles herself. I thought that was all superficial/not important.

You are strange OP How old are you that you did not realize outward appearances matter a whole lot?! And yes, people can absolutely dress up to appear sophisticated.

[Anonymous]

So if she ends up with a ‘judge kavanaugh’ and you end up with a ‘bill gates’ do you think she will be better off?? It’s a marathon not a sprint race. A man is not a plan.

[Anonymous]

OP: are you Indian?

[Anonymous]

Is she getting HIT ON by them or is she getting marriage proposals and "let's get serious" conversations.

If she is pretty and friendly/outgoing, she will get hit on by many men around her, and that is probably just who is around her. Even if you are not their type, a pretty girl who is friendly and outgoing will get hit on.

Serious relationships and marriage are where the other things come into question--whether you are their type, what else you bring to the table, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP: are you Indian?

yes. I am also ethnic looking. Not a "white passing" Indian.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Look online, post a pic of "her style" and post a pic of "your style".

That’s what my friend dresses /looks like. Although she’s not rich so nothing designer. Just super sleek hair and subtle but well put together makeup.

I’m in investment banking, not a trust funder, so I might not be the demographic you’re talking about. Under 40, happily married for 10 years, never had a problem dating when I was single. I fully acknowledge that my physical appearance could be picked apart by internet strangers.

First picture is attractive to me and second picture would be of no interest. I am not looking to offend you, but my immediate gut reaction was: first picture has her sh!t together, second woman looks goofy to me (I think it’s the huge scarf and the shade of lipstick, but I don’t know). Again, not trying to be offensive, these are just my personal tastes and there is no reason for you to cater to me or anyone else.

The “polish” issue you mentioned is probably it.

wow. thank you. I never thought of it this way or that guys would notice little things like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP: are you Indian?

yes. I am also ethnic looking. Not a "white passing" Indian.

Is your friend also Indian?

[Anonymous]

My best guess is that she is simply prettier than you are, and there is assortive mating going on (10s chasing 10s; hipster guys who are 6s going after realistic you and non unobtainable her).