Play date screwup on all sides - what do I do now?

[Anonymous]

Maybe she had an unexpectedly busy day too and hasn’t had a chance to get back to you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you guys quit with digs? I had a mixup with a play date and want to make it up. I’m typing on my phone and gave too much detail. I like this mom and I didn’t have that much choice in it.

I mean, you did actually... but she doesn’t know that. She didn’t respond another time, so maybe she doesn’t always respond to texts. Honestly, I’d be annoyed if I were her. But not a huge deal. Did today and tomorrow not work for you or her? If her, I’m confused because that means she did reply. If for you, that means you offered no makeup options? How do you expect her to respond?

Sorry - what I meant is, I offered tomorrow and to host, and she said no. I apologized and canceled and she didn’t reply at all. She’s one of the few moms I’ve spent one on one time with, she also moved and carped about it a lot, and I know it seems silly but I think it’s absurd to not reply with a “no biggie, another time” text when someone apologizes a ton. I had no idea my husband made this plan, and yes, we will get a calendar app but it was just a mixup; I don’t want to mess up a friendship let alone my kid’s play dates over this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Maybe she had an unexpectedly busy day too and hasn’t had a chance to get back to you.

True. Thanks, pp.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you guys quit with digs? I had a mixup with a play date and want to make it up. I’m typing on my phone and gave too much detail. I like this mom and I didn’t have that much choice in it.

I mean, you did actually... but she doesn’t know that. She didn’t respond another time, so maybe she doesn’t always respond to texts. Honestly, I’d be annoyed if I were her. But not a huge deal. Did today and tomorrow not work for you or her? If her, I’m confused because that means she did reply. If for you, that means you offered no makeup options? How do you expect her to respond?

Sorry - what I meant is, I offered tomorrow and to host, and she said no. I apologized and canceled and she didn’t reply at all. She’s one of the few moms I’ve spent one on one time with, she also moved and carped about it a lot, and I know it seems silly but I think it’s absurd to not reply with a “no biggie, another time” text when someone apologizes a ton. I had no idea my husband made this plan, and yes, we will get a calendar app but it was just a mixup; I don’t want to mess up a friendship let alone my kid’s play dates over this.

You sound nuts. You need to pump the brakes and have a couple glasses of wine or something. I wouldn’t be falling over myself to respond to you either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you guys quit with digs? I had a mixup with a play date and want to make it up. I’m typing on my phone and gave too much detail. I like this mom and I didn’t have that much choice in it.

You had the choice to keep the play date. You chose not to.

No, I really didn’t. I got into a minor argument with DH about it. He works enough weekday hours that he wanted to spend time with us. He is very laid back and this was aberrant. Just a bad day and crap timing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can you guys quit with digs? I had a mixup with a play date and want to make it up. I’m typing on my phone and gave too much detail. I like this mom and I didn’t have that much choice in it.

I mean, you did actually... but she doesn’t know that. She didn’t respond another time, so maybe she doesn’t always respond to texts. Honestly, I’d be annoyed if I were her. But not a huge deal. Did today and tomorrow not work for you or her? If her, I’m confused because that means she did reply. If for you, that means you offered no makeup options? How do you expect her to respond?

Sorry - what I meant is, I offered tomorrow and to host, and she said no. I apologized and canceled and she didn’t reply at all. She’s one of the few moms I’ve spent one on one time with, she also moved and carped about it a lot, and I know it seems silly but I think it’s absurd to not reply with a “no biggie, another time” text when someone apologizes a ton. I had no idea my husband made this plan, and yes, we will get a calendar app but it was just a mixup; I don’t want to mess up a friendship let alone my kid’s play dates over this.

You sound nuts. You need to pump the brakes and have a couple glasses of wine or something. I wouldn’t be falling over myself to respond to you either.

Christ, you’re a bitch.

[Anonymous]

You flaked on her at the last minute and she's miffed. I'd be too. If she works then her weekend time is also precious and she set aside time to spend for a play date as opposed to doing other things she can't get done on a weekend. I get it, you moved and are clearly not that organized. It's ok for you but not when it affects other people.

[Anonymous]

You went shopping instead of staying put for a scheduled play date?

[Anonymous]

1. Maybe you could have explained the dilemma and asked if she was ok with a drop off play date this time. You know her well enough. You could furniture shop while dd played there.

2. I don't understand, do you and your husband both stay at play dates? Could you go with dd and leave dh home after shopping?

[Anonymous]

She’s annoyed and needs some time to get over it.

[Anonymous]

If you accidentally double book a day, you keep the appointment that involves another person. She saved the day for you, probably rearranged her schedule. You should have inconvenienced yourself, not her.

[Anonymous]

So, you made a plan to have a play date (for what, 2 hours or so)...then your DH pitched a shit fit because he can’t buy shelves alone and because your family must spend every minute of Saturday together? And the reason for the shit fit is that he has a job?

Mmmmkay...good luck with that. I hope big baby likes his shelves.

[Anonymous]

I’m confused by your OP. Call her on the phone after a few days. Keep it simple and apologize. She might be mad that you cancelled
The one time you were going to host at your house.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You went shopping instead of staying put for a scheduled play date?

And you're angry because she didn't respond to your text canceling at the last minute?

Newsflash: she isn't obligated to respond. You canceled. Message received. It's unreasonable for you to expect a "No worries" text to clear your conscience. Get over it.

[Anonymous]

I think it’s rude to make plans with someone and then cancel because your husband wants you to go shopping with him. She set aside the time for you—honor your commitments. You should have gone shopping with DH later in the day or next weekend.

If I were her, I would NOT want to make future plans with you.