How do American kids have so much confidence?

[Anonymous]

American families tell their kids "you can do it! go for it!" The invest all sorts of money and time to build their kids' confidence and independence. (too much so!)

Families from India often try to discourage their kids from doing something.

I think this is changing though!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're confusing entitlement with confidence.

And disrespect

Kids nowadays are absolutely horrific.

Kids.

I don't know what's wrong with these kids today.

Kids.

Who can understand anything they say.

Kids.

Disobedient, disrespectful oafs.

Noisy. Crazy. Sloppy lazy loafers.

And while we're on the subject...

[Anonymous]

In the Indian culture, you are taught to be submissive, at a young age. That continues into adulthood. I know many women from India in abusive relationships but hey, they were taught to be "respectful."

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're confusing entitlement with confidence.

And disrespect

Kids nowadays are absolutely horrific.

Buncha cranky people on DCUM today.

[Anonymous]

I always scratch my head when people say our kids should be more like the ones in poverty striken counties who best engineering feats are featured in McDonalds happy meals.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're confusing entitlement with confidence.

And disrespect

Kids nowadays are absolutely horrific.

[phone]

Even has a youngster, I was shocked with the way some classmates disrespected teachers, their parents and other classmates.

[Anonymous]

We are a nation of immigrants and explorers. We have no monarchy and, at least at first appearance, are a meritocracy. We have a fierce sense of independence.

Because of all of this, we raise our kids in this culture and we really believe we can do or fix anything.

I think it is both an awesome part of the American culture and responsible for some of our craziness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're confusing entitlement with confidence.

And disrespect

Kids nowadays are absolutely horrific.

[phone]

Even has a youngster, I was shocked with the way some classmates disrespected teachers, their parents and other classmates.

They are out of control. Cocky SOBs.

OP - you are totally confused dude.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're confusing entitlement with confidence.

And disrespect

Kids nowadays are absolutely horrific.

[phone]

Even has a youngster, I was shocked with the way some classmates disrespected teachers, their parents and other classmates.

They are out of control. Cocky SOBs.

OP - you are totally confused dude.

How much time have you spent overseas ot with foreign children and teens? It doesn't sound like you understand what OP is talking about.

She's not talking about disrespectful, out-of-control kids, she's talking about well behaved kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're confusing entitlement with confidence.

And disrespect

Kids nowadays are absolutely horrific.

Oh please, grandma. The kids I know "these days" are wonderful.

OP, you don't feel that easy confidence here- but you'd have it at home. They would feel off balance in India.

[Anonymous]

This is OP. Politeness and respect for elders is so ingrained in me that even now I naturally defer to my bosses and in laws and parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because we're not taught to show deference to elders. We grow up in a throw-away society, including throwing away our elders (nursing homes), rather than seeing elders as wise and experienced.

When children here interrupt they're listened to, whereas children elsewhere are taught to be quiet and listen.

+10000! I, like the OP, is from a predominantly Asian society and I find kids here precocious. You're right to say that kids here are listened to for their input whereas when I was going up, children were seen and not heard. What I find problematic is that kids here grow up thinking that all of their opinions are automatically validated just because they have them...I know this cos I teach college students!

This is OP. I agree.

The way I grew up in a rigid culture with a strict heigharchy, I definitely did not have respect as a kid. As a kid, I wasn't seen as my own person but rather an extension of my family. I was encouraged to speak without being spoken to or make decisions for myself. What subjects I picked or what party I was allowed to go to was always up to debate with my parents and family.

As a result I am very unsure of myself and meek and feel that I don't even know what are my interests and what are the interests I adopted to please my parents! I am in therapy to sort myself out.

Meanwhile my fellow American teens were...scary to me. They were so young but they came from such a place of inner Confidence. They knew exactly who they were and what their interests are and what they like and dislike. Instead of deferring to their elders such as teachers and parents, they genuinely believe they knew best!

I think the confidence is great but they can also be very rude and short sighted. Just because a 16 year old thinks he knows best doesn't mean he really does!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because we're not taught to show deference to elders. We grow up in a throw-away society, including throwing away our elders (nursing homes), rather than seeing elders as wise and experienced.

When children here interrupt they're listened to, whereas children elsewhere are taught to be quiet and listen.

OP here.

This is what I observed. Back home, we had a very strict environment in our private school. When the bell rang everyone had to be in their seats and no one can speak until they raise their hand and the teacher calls on them. We were actually not encouraged to ask questions etc.

In America the kids just had such sheer confidence. They'd strut around the halls with attitude, talk in loud voices, laugh at the teacher, joke around etc.

I'm in my thirties and still wish this easy confidence can rub on me.

It's because in other countries kids are disciplined more without the fear of being called out for child abuse. Teachers in other countries are known to physically hit kids when they misbehave and seem to have as much authority as the parents. In America kids run the show because they are more protected and parents give them what they want or don't pay attention to what their kids are doing and give them more independence at a young age hence the reason kids have sex at earlier ages and misbehave in school and are just rude all around.

THAT IS COMPLETELY BULSHI. I visit my friend in Budapest and kids there have full sexual relationships by 13/14. Definitely by 15. The idea that American teens are sexually active at a younger age is hogwash

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because we're not taught to show deference to elders. We grow up in a throw-away society, including throwing away our elders (nursing homes), rather than seeing elders as wise and experienced.

When children here interrupt they're listened to, whereas children elsewhere are taught to be quiet and listen.

OP here.

This is what I observed. Back home, we had a very strict environment in our private school. When the bell rang everyone had to be in their seats and no one can speak until they raise their hand and the teacher calls on them. We were actually not encouraged to ask questions etc.

In America the kids just had such sheer confidence. They'd strut around the halls with attitude, talk in loud voices, laugh at the teacher, joke around etc.

I'm in my thirties and still wish this easy confidence can rub on me.

It's because in other countries kids are disciplined more without the fear of being called out for child abuse. Teachers in other countries are known to physically hit kids when they misbehave and seem to have as much authority as the parents. In America kids run the show because they are more protected and parents give them what they want or don't pay attention to what their kids are doing and give them more independence at a young age hence the reason kids have sex at earlier ages and misbehave in school and are just rude all around.

THAT IS COMPLETELY BULSHI. I visit my friend in Budapest and kids there have full sexual relationships by 13/14. Definitely by 15. The idea that American teens are sexually active at a younger age is hogwash

That's NOT true. If you've seen that, know that it's very uncommon.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You're confusing entitlement with confidence.

And disrespect

Kids nowadays are absolutely horrific.

[phone]

Even has a youngster, I was shocked with the way some classmates disrespected teachers, their parents and other classmates.

They are out of control. Cocky SOBs.

OP - you are totally confused dude.

How much time have you spent overseas ot with foreign children and teens? It doesn't sound like you understand what OP is talking about.

She's not talking about disrespectful, out-of-control kids, she's talking about well behaved kids.

17 years