Upper Elementary activities and playdates

[Anonymous]

No personal trainers here- we really focus on natural activities like hiking or mountain biking and sports for exercise.

Play dates happen 2-3 times/week during summer, less in other seasons because we have a minimum of 6 practices and piano each week.

My rising 4th grader will have piano and two practices per week (soccer in fall, Bball and yoga in winter and lax in spring) and a game on saturdays. Weekend "play dates" are usually a sleepover. She plays golf twice a week as well.

[Anonymous]

We are introverted and don't like being overscheduled. Two activities a week, birthday parties, family outings, and school is enough for us. If you don't allow for homebody time in your schedule, when will your kids (also probably introverts?) get their needed downtime? You can always add more activities or socializing if it's too boring, but it's harder to make time from a full schedule. Keep tweaking it until it feels like the right amount of activity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote: No personal trainers here- we really focus on natural activities like hiking or mountain biking and sports for exercise.

Play dates happen 2-3 times/week during summer, less in other seasons because we have a minimum of 6 practices and piano each week.

My rising 4th grader will have piano and two practices per week (soccer in fall, Bball and yoga in winter and lax in spring) and a game on saturdays. Weekend "play dates" are usually a sleepover. She plays golf twice a week as well.

I'm guessing a SAHP in the mix?

[Anonymous]

I have a rising 4th and 2nd grader. Both go to an after school martial arts program instead of SACC. They like the activity and have friends there. They also each do one sport per season. We end up being out 2-4 nights per week for practices and usually have a game or practice/activity each Saturday and Sunday. We try to carpool as much as possible with others on the team. We both WOTH. I find they have made good friends with kids on their sports teams and martial arts classes over the years. Play dates spontaneously happen with kids on the street on the weekends. Parents don't organize for the 4th graders anymore. They knock on doors and see who is available. We text for the 2nd grader to ask if they can come over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a rising 4th and 2nd grader. Both go to an after school martial arts program instead of SACC. They like the activity and have friends there. They also each do one sport per season. We end up being out 2-4 nights per week for practices and usually have a game or practice/activity each Saturday and Sunday. We try to carpool as much as possible with others on the team. We both WOTH. I find they have made good friends with kids on their sports teams and martial arts classes over the years. Play dates spontaneously happen with kids on the street on the weekends. Parents don't organize for the 4th graders anymore. They knock on doors and see who is available. We text for the 2nd grader to ask if they can come over.

We live in a neighborhood with NO 4th graders -- it's all old timers and DINKs, so that organic play date won't happen unless we move. We are several blocks and a busy street away from nearest friend

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:School year schedule for our rising 4th grader:

Mon- girls on the run
Tues- math tutoring then swim club
Wed- girls on the run then karate
Thurs: math tutoring then swim
Fri- math tutoring, friend time
Sat- swim meet or friend time
Sun- swim club, swim meet or friend time

She also sees a personal trainer every other week and has exercises that he assigns her that take about 15-20 minutes per day.

Our DD doesn't get much friend time during the week beyond school and GOTR which she does at school with her friends. We let her FaceTime with her friends in the evening if she is done with everything. We let her hang out with friends for extended periods on the weekend- we are liberal with sleepovers because she works very hard. I understand 4th grade is harder because of compacted math, so I don't plan on changing my "weekdays are workdays" approach.

A4th grader with a personal trainer. I've seen it all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a rising 4th and 2nd grader. Both go to an after school martial arts program instead of SACC. They like the activity and have friends there. They also each do one sport per season. We end up being out 2-4 nights per week for practices and usually have a game or practice/activity each Saturday and Sunday. We try to carpool as much as possible with others on the team. We both WOTH. I find they have made good friends with kids on their sports teams and martial arts classes over the years. Play dates spontaneously happen with kids on the street on the weekends. Parents don't organize for the 4th graders anymore. They knock on doors and see who is available. We text for the 2nd grader to ask if they can come over.

We live in a neighborhood with NO 4th graders -- it's all old timers and DINKs, so that organic play date won't happen unless we move. We are several blocks and a busy street away from nearest friend

That's more difficult. I don't enjoy arranging play dates and am usually too tired from the workweek to think ahead. I'd encourage sports and clubs since friendships seem to happen naturally. In your situation it's fine to call, text or email other parents to ask if their kid can come over.

[Anonymous]

Surprised at how many people are doing out of school tutoring! This is a thing?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a rising 4th and 2nd grader. Both go to an after school martial arts program instead of SACC. They like the activity and have friends there. They also each do one sport per season. We end up being out 2-4 nights per week for practices and usually have a game or practice/activity each Saturday and Sunday. We try to carpool as much as possible with others on the team. We both WOTH. I find they have made good friends with kids on their sports teams and martial arts classes over the years. Play dates spontaneously happen with kids on the street on the weekends. Parents don't organize for the 4th graders anymore. They knock on doors and see who is available. We text for the 2nd grader to ask if they can come over.

We live in a neighborhood with NO 4th graders -- it's all old timers and DINKs, so that organic play date won't happen unless we move. We are several blocks and a busy street away from nearest friend

That's more difficult. I don't enjoy arranging play dates and am usually too tired from the workweek to think ahead. I'd encourage sports and clubs since friendships seem to happen naturally. In your situation it's fine to call, text or email other parents to ask if their kid can come over.

Yeah we just aren't as close to them because we aren't neighbors nor run in same circles. It's been hard -- sometimes they don't even text back! Hate to have to pester people but want to do what's good for DD (and she considers their kid a friend) -- though then we wonder if the other kid maybe doesn't reciprocate friendship, and their parents silence is an awkward way of demuring because we adults aren't really close.

Sending kids knocking on doors is much easier -- any suggestions for which activities have a good social component-- maybe we should be more strategic...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Surprised at how many people are doing out of school tutoring! This is a thing?

Outside of DCUM, no

[Anonymous]

So 4 out of 7 nights seems pretty typical?

[Anonymous]

Wow. That's crazy. You couldn't pay me to put my kid through that. Here's my well rounded, academically advanced kid's schedule:

Mon - home, perhaps go to the local park
Tues - same
Wed - karate at school
Thurs - home, park/playground, read, play etc
Fri - same
Sat and Sun - family time, birthday parties, hikes, museums etc

Let your kids be kids. They are already at school all day, why on earth would they need math tutoring multiple times a week or extra social (but organized) activities? Give your kids the chance to get bored, to learn independently, to be in charge of their own activities and entertainment.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So 4 out of 7 nights seems pretty typical?

No, it's nuts. If you need to do it for childcare, sure. But if you are just trying to over schedule your child and make her miserable, go right ahead.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a rising 4th and 2nd grader. Both go to an after school martial arts program instead of SACC. They like the activity and have friends there. They also each do one sport per season. We end up being out 2-4 nights per week for practices and usually have a game or practice/activity each Saturday and Sunday. We try to carpool as much as possible with others on the team. We both WOTH. I find they have made good friends with kids on their sports teams and martial arts classes over the years. Play dates spontaneously happen with kids on the street on the weekends. Parents don't organize for the 4th graders anymore. They knock on doors and see who is available. We text for the 2nd grader to ask if they can come over.

We live in a neighborhood with NO 4th graders -- it's all old timers and DINKs, so that organic play date won't happen unless we move. We are several blocks and a busy street away from nearest friend

That's more difficult. I don't enjoy arranging play dates and am usually too tired from the workweek to think ahead. I'd encourage sports and clubs since friendships seem to happen naturally. In your situation it's fine to call, text or email other parents to ask if their kid can come over.

Yeah we just aren't as close to them because we aren't neighbors nor run in same circles. It's been hard -- sometimes they don't even text back! Hate to have to pester people but want to do what's good for DD (and she considers their kid a friend) -- though then we wonder if the other kid maybe doesn't reciprocate friendship, and their parents silence is an awkward way of demuring because we adults aren't really close.

Sending kids knocking on doors is much easier -- any suggestions for which activities have a good social component-- maybe we should be more strategic...

I'm in the same boat with my 2 kids and stress over their lack of outside school friends. Have a rising 5th and 3rd grader and I'm divorced with both of us WOH. Kids do martial arts after school (after care) and both have one activity per season. We don't have neighborhood kids surrounding us, only retirees and do not attend the boundary school so no bus to make friends. I frequent their school events and they have friends. Just as my 5th grader gets older, birthday parties are less and it seems other parents are already in formed groups. I will try to make a better effort to reach out to the parents of the kids he's buddies with. I wish this was all easier. I grew up with close neighborhood friends and riding the bus. You're not the only one in this boat.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Surprised at how many people are doing out of school tutoring! This is a thing?

Outside of DCUM, no

Tell that to the Kumon, Mathnasium, Sylvan, etc all around this area. Looks pretty common to me.