Do you feed in-laws when they visit?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with cut up apples. Every time they come for lunch unannounced. Every time. Tomato soup and grilled cheese every time they come for dinner unannounced. Every time.

I love this one. Least aggressive and time consuming as well as cost friendly.

[Anonymous]

Offer them food but nothing big. Do not order out or cook a fancy meal. Salad, sandwiches, whatever you would have otherwise.

[Anonymous]

Just offer them whatever you are having. "MIL, I was just making a chopped salad. Would you guys like some? No? Okay. Well, there's some cold cuts and cheese in the fridge if you'd like to make yourself a sandwich." Then, nothing. Don't offer to order takeout. Don't change your menu. Don't act like a short-order cook.

If it's in between mealtimes, just set out some veggies and hummus, or some fruit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well hopefully they aren't coming by unannounced. Next time a visit is being discussed, say, "Noon is fine. Sounds like we will need to plan lunch. I'll do a pot of chili, and it would be great if you can do cornbread and fruit salad." Simply don't confirm a visit without discussing and delegating meals.

This.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I came from a family where you feed people, even if it's a burden on you. I would keep baguettes in your freezer, olives and tapenade in your pantry, and bring them out if the in laws are there. Chips and salsa. Some baby carrots and hummus. No need to make a meal unless you invited them for a meal, but don't be a poor hostess unless you truly truly can't afford bread and olives.

+1

Offer something to any guest, particularly if it is around mealtime. Always. It is considered cheap not to - since you asked.

It is also considered very rude to show up at mealtime expecting to be fed when you have not been invited for dinner.

[Anonymous]

Are they coming at mealtime? If not, your response should be, "oh, we already ate, but you can help yourself to cold cuts if you'd like."

[Anonymous]

I hate my inlaws so I let them go hungry. I'm hoping they get the hint that I don't want them in my home

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:All my in-laws live within a 20 minutes radius so they drop by often and most of the time it's usually around 1 PM or after 5 PM. I am just wondering what is common... I feel like they always expect to be fed at my house. Sometimes when they drop by I will offer them snacks and drink but mostly they say they "haven't eaten anything all day so good would be great." DH and I don't do lunches and if we do it's usually salad. My in-laws hate salad and they don't consider any food without meat food. Sometimes I have all 3 of them with their wives and kids visit at the same time so those are a lot of mouths to feed.

My DH and I have spoken time and again that it's not fair that they don't bring or offer to chip in to buying takeout/delivery so we shouldn't be going out of our way. We feel guilty so we end up ordering food.

How do you guys handles in-laws visits? Do you always provide or order food? What kind?

I would have DH deal with it and not be available all the time. If that's not an option, I'd have a basket of snacks, things you can keep in pantry and just pull out. Little packets of nuts, crackers, chocolate, etc. add a couple pieces of fruit and voila, done. If they expected more, I'd have a come to Jesus with them.

[Anonymous]

Are they showing up unannounced? If so, just offer whatever you're having (salad). If not, just say "X is not a good time, how about y".

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with cut up apples. Every time they come for lunch unannounced. Every time. Tomato soup and grilled cheese every time they come for dinner unannounced. Every time.

I love this one. Least aggressive and time consuming as well as cost friendly.

It would work if the inlaws were aged 10 and under, but that wouldn't fly with my inlaws!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with cut up apples. Every time they come for lunch unannounced. Every time. Tomato soup and grilled cheese every time they come for dinner unannounced. Every time.

I love this one. Least aggressive and time consuming as well as cost friendly.

It would work if the inlaws were aged 10 and under, but that wouldn't fly with my inlaws!

Then they can get their own food. It isn't a food bank.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with cut up apples. Every time they come for lunch unannounced. Every time. Tomato soup and grilled cheese every time they come for dinner unannounced. Every time.

I love this one. Least aggressive and time consuming as well as cost friendly.

It would work if the inlaws were aged 10 and under, but that wouldn't fly with my inlaws!

That's the point.

[Anonymous]

OP, the context really matters. Do they drop by unannounced? How many times per week do they visit?

[Anonymous]

hot pockets, frozen pizza, ramen cooked with frozen chicken, fish sticks/chicken strips, with a side of microwaved broccoli.

[Anonymous]

Have some containers of frozen spaghetti sauce in the freezer. Pasta, sauce, salad, done!!