How to address a manager who crosses work-life boundaries

[Anonymous]

Track the time you work and delete that from your sick leave. So if you spend two hours working, put down for two hours of working and six hours of sick leave.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Federal manager here, and I agree with 14:46. Especially because, OP, you say that you are in a role where your primary function is to lead and facilitate conference calls and meetings. I feel for you, really, but I think some proactive communication when you're out -- I'm sick, this is what's on deck for me today and what you, manager, might need to know to cover in my absence -- might go a long way? You shouldn't have to work when you're sick, and setting some boundaries on your end is just fine (e.g. not checking work e-mail). But I also think it's fair to say that -- sick or not -- you're still responsible for the work assigned to you and need to make sure that whoever is at the office knows what they need to know to function in your absence.

This is what I do as well. I've learned to manage my boss. My DH is a Fed and he is actually the one who taught me how to effectively do this. I send a very detailed email about anything I feel my boss might be concerned about. I include information about tasks I have delegated and make sure she knows that I have everything covered. I really like her, but she is a bit of a control freak (as am I). I know her well enough to know the type of stuff that gets her spun up. Unless I am really too sick to function, I answer calls, texts, and emails from her. I think it makes her feel better just knowing she can reach me if she needs to. I generally won't answer calls from other people, but I do respond to my boss.

It sucks. But when you are in a leadership position, it's hard to be 100% unreachable.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Federal manager here, and I agree with 14:46. Especially because, OP, you say that you are in a role where your primary function is to lead and facilitate conference calls and meetings. I feel for you, really, but I think some proactive communication when you're out -- I'm sick, this is what's on deck for me today and what you, manager, might need to know to cover in my absence -- might go a long way? You shouldn't have to work when you're sick, and setting some boundaries on your end is just fine (e.g. not checking work e-mail). But I also think it's fair to say that -- sick or not -- you're still responsible for the work assigned to you and need to make sure that whoever is at the office knows what they need to know to function in your absence.

This is what I do as well. I've learned to manage my boss. My DH is a Fed and he is actually the one who taught me how to effectively do this. I send a very detailed email about anything I feel my boss might be concerned about. I include information about tasks I have delegated and make sure she knows that I have everything covered. I really like her, but she is a bit of a control freak (as am I). I know her well enough to know the type of stuff that gets her spun up. Unless I am really too sick to function, I answer calls, texts, and emails from her. I think it makes her feel better just knowing she can reach me if she needs to. I generally won't answer calls from other people, but I do respond to my boss.

It sucks. But when you are in a leadership position, it's hard to be 100% unreachable.

I do this too. I am a lawyer and it's reasonable for my boss to be concerned about deadlines -- court, internal, whatever. So any time I take leave, for whatever reason, I email him to say whether or not any deadlines will be impacted. Of course they never are because I wouldn't take the leave if it meant I'd blow a deadline (unless I was physically unable to rise from my bed or something). But he likes the reassurance.

And I try to check my work email every few hours unless I am actually asleep, just in case anything comes up. My boss would never call me though unless it were a true emergency.

[Anonymous]

I think it depends on how sick you are and how often you get sick.

I tend to get sick a fair amount with colds etc. I like to stay home when I do get sick. So, I try to spend a little bit of time during my sick days troubleshooting and still working. I then report some sick hours and some work hours.

I want to be able to stay home when I get sick, so I try to make it so that things still run ok when I am sick so that I don't feel pressured to come in.

[Anonymous]

Life as a fed. So much work, so little pay.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am a federal employee. I know it's insppropriate but how do I address beyond what I've already said? I really like her but this is killing me!

Just don't respond. When you get back to work and she's all "WTH? I texted you!" be like "Oh, sorry. As I told you, I was sick. I didn't see your text because I was sleeping and had a fever." If you're taking a sick day you're not working. If you're working from home because you're under the weather then you're working. Just be non-responsive once you've announced you're home sick.

This is what I do UNLESS there is something happening in my work that I cannot put off until I am back in the office. If your work duties are such that someone else will have to cover for you when you are out (meaning, the work can't wait until you are back in the office) then you absolutely should brief that person before you go out and be prepared to field a question or two.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This week I have been home sick. I'm of the mindset, unless it's a time sensitive matter or of the utmost importance, coworkers should not contact you and a. Ask you to attend conference calls, webinars and meetings when you have taken a sick day b. Contact you on your personal (not work) email and cell via text and request documents or status updates. My manager constantly texts us if we are home I'll asking us to take calls. I'm in a federal role where the majority of the day is leading and facilitating conference calls and meetings. After being worn down and sick, I took a day with one minor meeting rather than yesterday with four major meetings and have my manager and our big boss, who is my supervisor, notice.

Now I have a text from my manager: hey! Are you going to call in to X meeting? Separate text (after I responded no I'm home sick--I have an out of office message on my VM, BB, email and had emailed and called her this morning at 8:30): please send me what you have on X.

I don't have the materials home with me and I'm home sick.

I've had conversations with her as hsve team members about not contacting me when I'm out sick as im not checking work email or voicemail and to only contact me on my personal number in urgent matters. What can I do? I'm a high GS-13 in a federal agency.

Thanks in advance!

I don't think it is crazy that after co firming you would not call into a meeting to then ask you for the materials regarding the meeting. You should have sent the info when you called in sick so she can lead the meeting.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Federal manager here, and I agree with 14:46. Especially because, OP, you say that you are in a role where your primary function is to lead and facilitate conference calls and meetings. I feel for you, really, but I think some proactive communication when you're out -- I'm sick, this is what's on deck for me today and what you, manager, might need to know to cover in my absence -- might go a long way? You shouldn't have to work when you're sick, and setting some boundaries on your end is just fine (e.g. not checking work e-mail). But I also think it's fair to say that -- sick or not -- you're still responsible for the work assigned to you and need to make sure that whoever is at the office knows what they need to know to function in your absence.

This is what I do as well. I've learned to manage my boss. My DH is a Fed and he is actually the one who taught me how to effectively do this. I send a very detailed email about anything I feel my boss might be concerned about. I include information about tasks I have delegated and make sure she knows that I have everything covered. I really like her, but she is a bit of a control freak (as am I). I know her well enough to know the type of stuff that gets her spun up. Unless I am really too sick to function, I answer calls, texts, and emails from her. I think it makes her feel better just knowing she can reach me if she needs to. I generally won't answer calls from other people, but I do respond to my boss.

It sucks. But when you are in a leadership position, it's hard to be 100% unreachable.

I do this too. I am a lawyer and it's reasonable for my boss to be concerned about deadlines -- court, internal, whatever. So any time I take leave, for whatever reason, I email him to say whether or not any deadlines will be impacted. Of course they never are because I wouldn't take the leave if it meant I'd blow a deadline (unless I was physically unable to rise from my bed or something). But he likes the reassurance.

And I try to check my work email every few hours unless I am actually asleep, just in case anything comes up. My boss would never call me though unless it were a true emergency.

Checking email every few hours when "not working" is ridiculous and a horrible model to set for your directs. People need the ability to unplug from the job. Nothing-NOTHING- and no obe is so critical that you can't take a sick day or a scheduled vacation and not be bothered. Plan it, communicate, but then unplug.

It's also a good control feature. If I had someone who couldn't get away I would start to wonder if there was something they didn't want people to uncover. But maybe that's the nature of my work.

[Anonymous]

You've been home sick all week? You need to be able to provide some updates. I'd be irritated if I was your boss.

[Anonymous]

You guys sound like jerks. I have been home sick since Monday. I sent my boss a status report on Monday morning. I delegated meetings to other team members and sent emails for meetings I was going to miss. But when I said I was sick, I was not well enough to be checking email, typing up reports, etc. I don't try to take the easy way out. But I think it is ridiculous to contact someone who is out sick about non urgent issues. I feel like my boss is a control freak.

I am not calling in or checking emails. Like I said, she was texting me on my personal cell. We only have cell phones and not a home phone so it was buzzing and I checked it.

I've been a manager and team leader before and you shouldn't have all heck break out because a staffer is out three days. It happens sometimes.

I haven't taken any leave except my maternity leave in over a year.

[Anonymous]

And for those of you who did not seem to get it, the agendas and materials were already sent out when I sent out meeting requests. I sent an email before work hours with the status of the day's events and any meeting materials. I confirmed I was home and would not be attending any calls or events as I was ill. What is the point of a sick day if you all think you should be working? How would one ever recover or get well?

[Anonymous]

I think there is a big difference between "working when sick" and being courteous to those in the office who have to pick up your work when you are out.
Anyone logical knows the difference between the two.

While I wouldn't ask anyone to work when sick, if someone on my team is out sick and we have a call/meeting/crisis of some kind, and the only person with the knowledge is out sick, we text them to ask for help. I've never had a single person complain and I have never complained. Everyone happily helps out. Frankly if its their project they would rather be asked so you don't screw up their work.

There's a difference between a career and a job. If you are out sick and your job is to work at starbucks as a barista, no one is expecting you to "work while sick". If you have a career, its a career. Its part of your life. A "sick day" does not mean you cease to exist.

I do the same on my end when I am out. I certainly am not available all day and answering emails if I am deathly ill, but if I can be helpful and I can manage it, I am happy to help out my staff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You guys sound like jerks. I have been home sick since Monday. I sent my boss a status report on Monday morning. I delegated meetings to other team members and sent emails for meetings I was going to miss. But when I said I was sick, I was not well enough to be checking email, typing up reports, etc. I don't try to take the easy way out. But I think it is ridiculous to contact someone who is out sick about non urgent issues. I feel like my boss is a control freak.

I am not calling in or checking emails. Like I said, she was texting me on my personal cell. We only have cell phones and not a home phone so it was buzzing and I checked it.

I've been a manager and team leader before and you shouldn't have all heck break out because a staffer is out three days. It happens sometimes.

I haven't taken any leave except my maternity leave in over a year.

Do you come across as defensively at work as you do here? That might be part of your problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I think there is a big difference between "working when sick" and being courteous to those in the office who have to pick up your work when you are out.
Anyone logical knows the difference between the two.

While I wouldn't ask anyone to work when sick, if someone on my team is out sick and we have a call/meeting/crisis of some kind, and the only person with the knowledge is out sick, we text them to ask for help. I've never had a single person complain and I have never complained. Everyone happily helps out. Frankly if its their project they would rather be asked so you don't screw up their work.

There's a difference between a career and a job. If you are out sick and your job is to work at starbucks as a barista, no one is expecting you to "work while sick". If you have a career, its a career. Its part of your life. A "sick day" does not mean you cease to exist.

I do the same on my end when I am out. I certainly am not available all day and answering emails if I am deathly ill, but if I can be helpful and I can manage it, I am happy to help out my staff.

Disagree. Being available when sick should not be an expectation. As an occasional courtesy, yes but employees should not feel pressure to be "on call" just because their corporate culture advocates it.

The main point in unplugging when sick, is to get well quick--out of the office and away from various job-related interruptions.

[Anonymous]

Idk it's hard for me to imagine. I'm in the private sector and I'm expected to work on sick days (answer all or most emails, take certain calls, monitor the markets and my stocks, etc.). To be frank, I've always done it because I'm only screwing myself if I let work pile up. The rest of the world stop turning just because you're out sick or on vacation. Obviously I wouldn't do this if I was on death's door. But if I'm out because of a stomach bug, for instance, yeah, I'm on my blackberry between heaves, lol.