How to address a manager who crosses work-life boundaries

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For your information, I did not take FMLA. I used my sick leave and annual leave as I'm a government employee. And can you believe that even though I had a detailee covering me, my boss still contacted me on maternity leave? And I'm not a super important person. I'm making $105K as a GS-13, which in my opinion does not constitute around the clock service. This is not "the world is going to end" work. Yes, I consider my job a career. I'm a good employee. But you know what? I was sick for three days because I felt like I could not relax or rest while I was actually sick. I'm not a person who takes leave, except for the birth of my child and a major surgery I had three years ago for a life threatening illness. I can't believe how many people feel the need to be plugged in and working 24/7. I don't think that is very healthy.

A PP here and I agree somewhat. I am not saying that you are wrong. It just seems to me that you need to learn to effectively manage YOUR specific boss.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For your information, I did not take FMLA. I used my sick leave and annual leave as I'm a government employee. And can you believe that even though I had a detailee covering me, my boss still contacted me on maternity leave? And I'm not a super important person. I'm making $105K as a GS-13, which in my opinion does not constitute around the clock service. This is not "the world is going to end" work. Yes, I consider my job a career. I'm a good employee. But you know what? I was sick for three days because I felt like I could not relax or rest while I was actually sick. I'm not a person who takes leave, except for the birth of my child and a major surgery I had three years ago for a life threatening illness. I can't believe how many people feel the need to be plugged in and working 24/7. I don't think that is very healthy.

A PP here and I agree somewhat. I am not saying that you are wrong. It just seems to me that you need to learn to effectively manage YOUR specific boss.

np, with similar seniority to you OP, and I agree that this is more about you and your boss's relationship. What is she so anxious about that she crosses this boundary with everyone when they are sick? Her behavior is impairing your health and making it worse. You need to both set firmer boundaries (over email) and figure out how to address whatever the real problem is.

This thread makes me glad that my boss always makes it a point to reply to "I'm sick" emails with "rest up" or some such. No pressure at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For your information, I did not take FMLA. I used my sick leave and annual leave as I'm a government employee. And can you believe that even though I had a detailee covering me, my boss still contacted me on maternity leave? And I'm not a super important person. I'm making $105K as a GS-13, which in my opinion does not constitute around the clock service. This is not "the world is going to end" work. Yes, I consider my job a career. I'm a good employee. But you know what? I was sick for three days because I felt like I could not relax or rest while I was actually sick. I'm not a person who takes leave, except for the birth of my child and a major surgery I had three years ago for a life threatening illness. I can't believe how many people feel the need to be plugged in and working 24/7. I don't think that is very healthy.

Ok I was with you till here but this makes you sound like a whiny princess. It was ok to relax when sick as a kid. You're an adult now. You still have to take care of your responsibilities even if you're sick and want to sleep the day away.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For your information, I did not take FMLA. I used my sick leave and annual leave as I'm a government employee. And can you believe that even though I had a detailee covering me, my boss still contacted me on maternity leave? And I'm not a super important person. I'm making $105K as a GS-13, which in my opinion does not constitute around the clock service. This is not "the world is going to end" work. Yes, I consider my job a career. I'm a good employee. But you know what? I was sick for three days because I felt like I could not relax or rest while I was actually sick. I'm not a person who takes leave, except for the birth of my child and a major surgery I had three years ago for a life threatening illness. I can't believe how many people feel the need to be plugged in and working 24/7. I don't think that is very healthy.

Ok I was with you till here but this makes you sound like a whiny princess. It was ok to relax when sick as a kid. You're an adult now. You still have to take care of your responsibilities even if you're sick and want to sleep the day away.

how rigid of you. Don't you think it depends on how sick she is? Would yo usay this to someone with cancer? No, so you acknowledge that illnesses vary.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Life as a fed. So much work, so little pay.

But money for doing nothing when the conditions are ripe.

[Anonymous]

I have always checked in when I was out of the office - on my honeymoon, in the hospital after surgery, in my kid's school parking lot, etc. I don't think it is unreasonable for an employee to work a few minutes when they are on leave.

I get irritated when people don't respond to any emails when they are out because their kid is sick or has a snow day. I don't expect you to work all day but please take a minute to answer an email.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP here. For your information, I did not take FMLA. I used my sick leave and annual leave as I'm a government employee. And can you believe that even though I had a detailee covering me, my boss still contacted me on maternity leave? And I'm not a super important person. I'm making $105K as a GS-13, which in my opinion does not constitute around the clock service. This is not "the world is going to end" work. Yes, I consider my job a career. I'm a good employee. But you know what? I was sick for three days because I felt like I could not relax or rest while I was actually sick. I'm not a person who takes leave, except for the birth of my child and a major surgery I had three years ago for a life threatening illness. I can't believe how many people feel the need to be plugged in and working 24/7. I don't think that is very healthy.

Ok I was with you till here but this makes you sound like a whiny princess. It was ok to relax when sick as a kid. You're an adult now. You still have to take care of your responsibilities even if you're sick and want to sleep the day away.

how rigid of you. Don't you think it depends on how sick she is? Would yo usay this to someone with cancer? No, so you acknowledge that illnesses vary.

She doesn't have cancer. She said up front it was a bad cold didn't she? Anyway, she's back to work and feeling fine. So, not cancer.