Feeling slighted on FB by DH

[Anonymous]

OP. Stop looking for validation. You are worried that your FB friends don't see your husband commenting. You really just want your FB friends to think that you have a good marriage. Maybe you do and maybe you don't but FB is not a good gauge of one's ACTUAL life.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - he is not some random friend. He is my DH. He failed to acknowledge a wedding photo and me writing Happy 15th anniversary to him. Dozens of friends wrote nice things and he didn't bother.

RE the birthday posts - I wrote a funny post about his party and he ignored it.

I see other spouses flirting/complimenting each other on FB and my DH writes comments on other people's posts sometimes but never ever on anything I post on his wall. I think it is a slight. I mean, if he saw what I posted and it was a tribute to him, would it kill him to hit the "like" button or write a 10 word comment acknowledging it?

Does he ignore you in day to day life? Or just on FB?

My husband and I rarely communicate on FB.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - he is not some random friend. He is my DH. He failed to acknowledge a wedding photo and me writing Happy 15th anniversary to him. Dozens of friends wrote nice things and he didn't bother.

RE the birthday posts - I wrote a funny post about his party and he ignored it.

I see other spouses flirting/complimenting each other on FB and my DH writes comments on other people's posts sometimes but never ever on anything I post on his wall. I think it is a slight. I mean, if he saw what I posted and it was a tribute to him, would it kill him to hit the "like" button or write a 10 word comment acknowledging it?

Did he wish you a happy anniversary IRL? He probably thought that sufficed.

[Anonymous]

The people I know who praise their spouse and make a huge deal on FB are the ones that are the closest to divorce. Focus on communication and closeness for real.

[Anonymous]

He ignores me in day to day life, too.

I was just sort of checking on fB to find out if he did that there too and he does...I mean, we have both been on FB five years and he has not one single time commented or liked anything I have ever posted on my wall or his wall and yet he has commented on many other people's posts. I think it is weird.

And as I said, I did not post a lot of things on his wall - just 7 or 8 things over the years so I am not some crazy FB person.

[Anonymous]

My DH isn't on facebook a lot either, and when he does he doesn't comment much. Yesterday was his birthday and I didn't post on his facebook wall, I wished him a happy birthday in person.

We don't wish each other happy anniversary, etc. on facebook.

I agree that you are looking for trouble where there is none. May I ask why it is important to you that he acknowledges milestones on facebook instead of in person? The answer to that question might give us some insight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP. Stop looking for validation. You are worried that your FB friends don't see your husband commenting. You really just want your FB friends to think that you have a good marriage. Maybe you do and maybe you don't but FB is not a good gauge of one's ACTUAL life.

Not at all. I just wanted him to acknowledge me and be a little bit happy that I posted something interesting/nice for him to see. That I wrote a funny thing about him. That I was thinking of him. That I was proud of our wedding photo and wanted friends to see it who had not been to the wedding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My DH isn't on facebook a lot either, and when he does he doesn't comment much. Yesterday was his birthday and I didn't post on his facebook wall, I wished him a happy birthday in person.

We don't wish each other happy anniversary, etc. on facebook.

I agree that you are looking for trouble where there is none. May I ask why it is important to you that he acknowledges milestones on facebook instead of in person? The answer to that question might give us some insight.

It wasn't so much the milestones themselves...I was hoping he would acknowledge the photos that I posted to brighten his day at work. Or for him to see I was flirting with him on FB which I think can be fun although I have barely tried to do this.

[Anonymous]

Mine never communicates with me through fb though he is on it regularly. We communicate actively and productively in real life, so I never notice it. Focus on what's going on in real life. Do not talk to him about fb when working on real life issues. You will sound silly and diminish your valid points.

[Anonymous]

Cheesiest posts EVER are when a spouse responds back to their spouse's postings, especially when it deals with some lovey doves crap. Grow up!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - he is not some random friend. He is my DH. He failed to acknowledge a wedding photo and me writing Happy 15th anniversary to him. Dozens of friends wrote nice things and he didn't bother.

RE the birthday posts - I wrote a funny post about his party and he ignored it.

I see other spouses flirting/complimenting each other on FB and my DH writes comments on other people's posts sometimes but never ever on anything I post on his wall. I think it is a slight. I mean, if he saw what I posted and it was a tribute to him, would it kill him to hit the "like" button or write a 10 word comment acknowledging it?

Have you considered having an affair to get back at him?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OP. Stop looking for validation. You are worried that your FB friends don't see your husband commenting. You really just want your FB friends to think that you have a good marriage. Maybe you do and maybe you don't but FB is not a good gauge of one's ACTUAL life.

Not at all. I just wanted him to acknowledge me and be a little bit happy that I posted something interesting/nice for him to see. That I wrote a funny thing about him. That I was thinking of him. That I was proud of our wedding photo and wanted friends to see it who had not been to the wedding.

You are coming off as desperate here, IMO. The much bigger issue is that he doesn't pay attention to you in real life. Facebook interactions should have little to no bearing. Have you considered marital counseling?

[Anonymous]

I never wish DW happy birthday or anniversary on FB. That just seems like you are fishing for comments. Other people recognize your birthday and no one else really gives a shit about your anniversary. That's between the 2 of you. Grow up OP and live your life in the real world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here - he is not some random friend. He is my DH. He failed to acknowledge a wedding photo and me writing Happy 15th anniversary to him. Dozens of friends wrote nice things and he didn't bother.

RE the birthday posts - I wrote a funny post about his party and he ignored it.

I see other spouses flirting/complimenting each other on FB and my DH writes comments on other people's posts sometimes but never ever on anything I post on his wall. I think it is a slight. I mean, if he saw what I posted and it was a tribute to him, would it kill him to hit the "like" button or write a 10 word comment acknowledging it?

If I were married to you, it would drive me into the arms of another man.

[Anonymous]

Why did you wish him a happy anniversary on FB. Why not in real life?

it is very odd to me that you want to have an online relationship with him and are judging him based on his online presence rather than assessing your REAL LIKE MARRIAGE - the guy lives in your house, you are married to him. Talk to him, say happy anniversary rather than going online and then waiting and getting mad when he doesn't click like.

You sound very immature and needy.