MIL threw away our coffee mugs

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you everyone for the support. I really am just speechless. I may have to feign some sort of illness (from overuse of former coffee mugs) and skip spending time with her this Sunday.

I guess that's a whole other issue - I am fine with DH spending time with her without me this Sunday, while I stay home with the kids. Is that ok?

Who cares - that's what I'm doing. I think I'll take the kids shopping for new coffee mugs. There, I feel better already. Thanks DCUM!

Oh hell no! Dont spend time with her! Stick to what you posted above and do what you want to do. She is lucky if her DH spends time with her Sunday.

Does she have some form of mental illness?

[Anonymous]

OP, if I can offer a silver lining: This will make a great story for years to come. And all it cost you was 10 old coffee mugs.

[Anonymous]

I have never heard of this health concern. Can anyone post a link? I Googled and got nothing. I need something new to add to my list of neuroses. Thanks.

[Anonymous]

i am sorry - that sounds crazy. i think its great that your dh stuck up for you and i think it was smart to take away the key. having a key to someone else's home is a privilege and she clearly abused the privilege.
what did she say when she was confronted?
has she done anything like this in the past?

and in no way am i trying to downplay the level of anger you should have because i would be just as mad myself, once i cool down i would try and remember coffee mugs (even sentimental) are just coffee mugs and she is family. but, i would be pissed for awhile before i got there! because family or not, boundaries and respect should apply to everyone!

[Anonymous]

Nope, she doesn't get a Mother's Day audience after this. Seriously, no. You get to take a nice long break from her presence, and DH can go see her some other time than Mother's Day.

Good for him for standing up to her. Next step is for you and he to decide if he's going to have a sit down or if you both are to express your dismay and give her the opportunity to apologize and express regret.

But she should not get to be alone in your house after this (which also means you can't rely on her for babysitting or house-watching either). Create some space and distance for awhile.

[Anonymous]

I think it's awesome that your DH has your back! Your MIL is crazy. Don't let her in your house again unless you and/or your DH are there.

[Anonymous]

Is this typical behavior? If not, she should maybe see a health professional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Is this typical behavior? If not, she should maybe see a health professional.

I was just going to post this.

[Anonymous]

Awesome that your DH reacted so appropriately. And great story! Totally worth more than the mugs. IL's an be a real hoot when DW and DH are a team!

[Anonymous]

OP here again. I don't think she's ever been professionally diagnosed with anything. But we are not close (clearly). And she does not babysit - I would not trust her and she shows little interest in the kids.

This past incident is not typical behavior. She's never let herself in our house before that I know of (aaak, now I am going to have to go through everything to see what else she may have "replaced"). Our kids better hide all their toys not made in the USA.

But I honestly don't know what she does all day.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. Thank you everyone for the support. I really am just speechless. I may have to feign some sort of illness (from overuse of former coffee mugs) and skip spending time with her this Sunday.

I guess that's a whole other issue - I am fine with DH spending time with her without me this Sunday, while I stay home with the kids. Is that ok?

Who cares - that's what I'm doing. I think I'll take the kids shopping for new coffee mugs. There, I feel better already. Thanks DCUM!

OP, this is so crazy (unless she has a history of overstepping boundaries) that I would be concerned she is having a medical issue (paranoia, etc.)

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't even know where to begin with this. I had about 10 coffee mugs - these were not a matching set. They are various mugs, accumulated over the years. I have a couple from college, Happy Mother's Day mug, other whimsical designs, etc. Last Saturday, I opened the cabinet to find that all of my coffee mugs had been replaced with clear glass mugs. I ask DH - he has no clue. We find out that his mother let herself into our house (she lives about 10 minutes away and has a key) without our permission, threw away my mugs, and replaced them. Her reasoning: the coating on my mugs cause cancer, especially when heated. She THREW AWAY my coffee mugs!!!

DH let her have it and took away her key. I honestly have no idea what I can do here, but I am still fuming. Though it actually feels better to vent here.

*applause*

I would be furious too, but take comfort in knowing that your DH is in your corner.

I would throw away the ones she bought and either buy a new matching set that you love, or start to replace the ones you can (from your college, etc.).

[Anonymous]

OP, did MIL at least say *anything* about your mugs before this happened? Like, was there some heated discussion about mug safety? It just seems so random and weird that she just walked into your house one day and replaced the mugs.

[Anonymous]

Go DH! Go OP! Change the locks, and spend the day together as a family. MIL can spend it with someone else. What a nutjob!! Oh, and deliver those mugs to her as a MIL present the night before; leave them on the doorstop. Then spend Mothers Day shopping for a set you really love that makes you feel good.

[Anonymous]

Donate them or give them (back) as a gift. Then start replacing and building your new collection