St. Stephens St. Agnes -- Hazing on Boys' Lacrosse

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Yuck. Another reason to avoid LAX.

This is not about lacrosse, it happens in all sports. God, get off the lacrosse bashing. You know nothing of what you are attacking.

[Anonymous]

OP, you left out important information - how does your own son feel about the practice?

You are paying tuition, and are part of the SSAS community, so of course protest to the administration if that is consistent with your beliefs. That said, if it does bother your son, why not encourage him to talk with the coaches? I would think this could be a good opportunity for him to learn how to manage a challenging social situation on his own, while he is still home and can have your support and guidance.

I shudder when I hear stories about college professors receiving complaints about grades from students' parents. Give your son the gift of encouraging HIM to stand up for what he thinks is right.

[Anonymous]

+1
It's not your battle, it's his.
If he doesn't mind it or even likes theprestige of a frosh on the team, let it be.
If he doesn't want to do it, tell him it's ok to stand up for himself and say no. If he's good enough to make the team and is a team player, people will repsect his opinion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:+1
It's not your battle, it's his.
If he doesn't mind it or even likes theprestige of a frosh on the team, let it be.
If he doesn't want to do it, tell him it's ok to stand up for himself and say no. If he's good enough to make the team and is a team player, people will repsect his opinion.

I understand that the next few days are all about admissions on this board, and that's understandable! However, I wanted to respond to the several posts which suggested this issue is one that should be handled by the athletes themselves with no parent or school involvement.

I'm a high school teacher and coach at an area independent school who was a collegiate athlete. First, this is not something that occurs everywhere in this area, even at schools known for lacrosse traditions. I would say, however, that what I would classify as "mild hazing" DOES occur at many places -- that's part of the problem. The parents posting things along the lines of letting kids fight their own battles mean well and are probably raising great, grounded, independent kids. And as a teacher, generally I am NOT in the camp of those who say "go to the Head of School."

This one is an exception. Below I've included a link to the National Federation of High School Sports page on hazing -- you'll see that head-shaving is listed as one of the classic hazing techniques. Certainly much less disgusting/vile/degrading than some other things that are described -- but it squarely falls within the definition of hazing.

There are a few problems with ignoring or letting kids handle the issue of head-shaving on a high school sports team. First, even if it is not true currently, if a hazing culture exists, even starting with relatively mild things like largely voluntary head-shaving, there is a fairly good possibility that more serious and/or potentially harmful hazing rituals may develop. Second, I believe strongly that athletics should be complementary to the core mission of the school, which is to educate its students. Singling out one particular team by something that is not transitory (like wearing jerseys on game days) sends a message to other students (and teachers too) that these boys are lacrosse players first (or football, or ice hockey, or baseball players), not students. Healthy pride in being on a team is one thing (jerseys on game days), shaved heads to me takes it a step too far. Third, given peer pressure it is virtually inconceivable that any particular athlete is going to say no to the bonding ritual -- it removes the element of voluntariness from the situation.

I have a lot of respect for SSSAS as an institution -- it's a good school, the current Head is highly respected, they've got a talented faculty and their teams are well-coached and sportsmanlike. I think they are on the wrong side of educational theory and best practices here, though, and if you are a parent and object to this I would encourage you to contact the school admin or possibly even the Board (given that head-shaving is not something that can go on beneath the surface, thus it seems that the current practice must be being at least implicitly sanctioned by the school admin). If nothing else, a healthy debate over the situation could not hurt.

Link to the website with hazing info:

http://www.nfhs.org/content.aspx?id=3766

[Anonymous]

Thank you, 10:42, for a superb, thoughtful and well-reasoned post that taught me something and made me think. I hope that my children may find teachers and coaches like you at their schools.

[Anonymous]

This does NOT happen everywhere and does NOT happen in other sports. And while some kids may be OK with it, it is almost certainly humiliating for others. This is the naked exercise of power inflicted on those who want to both make the team and be accepted and therefore have no choice but to comply. And this is not a battle kids can fight on their own because it is something that has been institutionalized. One child, alone, objects and that child will not make the team, at best, and will most likely be ridiculed. Shame on the school for allowing this and on parents for defending it.

[Anonymous]

This information is not accurate. It was not a hazing incident.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This information is not accurate. It was not a hazing incident.

I've heard nothing to counteract the factual report that seniors shaved the heads of freshman boys on the lacrosse team. This was publicly acknowledged by the SSSAS Athletic Director. SSSAS may not like the characterization of this as hazing, but those facts meet the definition of hazing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Apparently it is a "tradition" at SSSAS for the seniors on the boys' lacrosse team to shave the heads of the freshman boys (buzz cuts, designs, silly shapes, etc.). This is defended by the Head Coach, also the Athletic Director. I would call that hazing, not tradition. Why is it being allowed? It calls into question the values and philosophy of the institution as a whole.

That's not hazing. That's a rite of passage. There's a huge difference. Hazing is humiliating and dangerous. You're talking about hair removal.

Is it your supposition that shaving the head of new military recruits is hazing?

Rethink your views and shut up before you make an ass out of yourself.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This information is not accurate. It was not a hazing incident.

I've heard nothing to counteract the factual report that seniors shaved the heads of freshman boys on the lacrosse team. This was publicly acknowledged by the SSSAS Athletic Director. SSSAS may not like the characterization of this as hazing, but those facts meet the definition of hazing.

The definition of hazing is that it is dangerous, causes embarrassment, harassment or ridicule.

No rational person would conclude head shaving amounts to these things. If the seniors made the freshmen streak through campus wearing girls' panties, that would be hazing. If they made them chug a 12-pack of beer, that would be hazing. This? No. The only possible thing you could say is that it is embarrassing, but even that's a stretch. Boys shave their heads all the time, especially athletes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This does NOT happen everywhere and does NOT happen in other sports. And while some kids may be OK with it, it is almost certainly humiliating for others. This is the naked exercise of power inflicted on those who want to both make the team and be accepted and therefore have no choice but to comply. And this is not a battle kids can fight on their own because it is something that has been institutionalized. One child, alone, objects and that child will not make the team, at best, and will most likely be ridiculed. Shame on the school for allowing this and on parents for defending it.

So, you're pissed because someone wants to cut your snowflake's locks? What does HE say about it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Apparently it is a "tradition" at SSSAS for the seniors on the boys' lacrosse team to shave the heads of the freshman boys (buzz cuts, designs, silly shapes, etc.). This is defended by the Head Coach, also the Athletic Director. I would call that hazing, not tradition. Why is it being allowed? It calls into question the values and philosophy of the institution as a whole.

That's not hazing. That's a rite of passage. There's a huge difference. Hazing is humiliating and dangerous. You're talking about hair removal.

Is it your supposition that shaving the head of new military recruits is hazing?

Rethink your views and shut up before you make an ass out of yourself.

You might read post 10:4 check out the posted link on hazing from the National Federation of High School Sports.

Hazing rituals are often permitted to occur because they are seen as rites of passage. As to your analogy, the military does regard it as hazing if service members shave the heads of another service member. If this is done by other athletes on the team, it is not equivalent to an action taken by an official military organization (subject to Congressional oversight at that). Civilian groups such as fraternities imposing "military style" discipline (e.g. pushups) is also a classic of hazing.

(I would think that the above-quoted post was satirical or intentionally meant to cast SSSAS in an even worse light, but I'm afraid it is genuine.)

[Anonymous]

I'm assuming 16:48, 16:51, and 16:52 are all the same poster. I suggest you read up a little on hazing in high school and college sports.

No one is suggesting that what's going on at SSSAS reaches the level of truly dangerous abuse, but it definitely fits the definition of hazing as any educator with a little bit of training on the subject can tell you. And what starts as something relatively mild can escalate in later years quite easily.

Would the St. Stephens St. Agnes School community want this ritual discussed on the front page of the Washington Post sports section? Rhetorical question, of course -- the school would not. And that means this is something they should be looking at and discouraging -- there are a lot better ways to encourage team bonding and play good lacrosse (the ultimate goal) than a head-shaving ritual.

[Anonymous]

Wow. "Rethink your views and shut up before you make an ass out of yourself." "No rational person would think. . . ." If this is the type of discourse that is used or encouraged by those in the SSSAS community, I will need to think long and hard about the acceptance letter I received in the mail for my DC today. Many people will, like me, assume the name-calling and harsh rhetoric is coming from an SSSAS parent.

This is an important topic where reasonable people can disagree. Thoughtful and respectful posts -- like that of the teacher/coach in this thread -- are productive and should be encouraged, even if you might have a different point of view. Declarations that offer no support (e.g., "this is not hazing") are not particularly useful in furthering the discussion, and name-calling and nastiness should be shunned.

[Anonymous]

You people have way too much time on your hands if you are worried about this being hazing. I am so tired of overzealous parents who go around looking for non-existent problems to worry about.