Stanford professor dad - arrested and facing one year jail time because teens drank in his house

[Anonymous]

^^sorry about typos!

[Anonymous]

I so admire the parents' response to this: they're definitely taking the high road (no pun intended) by using the experience as an object lesson for opening a dialogue about teen drinking.

Honestly, I don't understand why this case somehow got national attention (Today Show) over the many others I found while googling the subject. Is it a statutory thing where some states enforce the rules and others don't?

On a practical level - what do you do? I have a 14 year old who goes to parties in our neighborhood (Brooklyn - it's easy to get around and kids do that). What is the best answer? Strip searching? No parties? Metal detectors at the door?

[Anonymous]

I'd like to ask the person who teaches teens what s/he would suggest?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is scary. The parents were home and allowed their senior in high school son to have some friends over during Thanksgiving weekend. Parents said no alcohol, and bought chips and soda. Dad had baked chocolate chip cookies and brought them down earlier, saw no alcohol, was baking brownies to take down when the police came, said they got an anonymous call, and that there was underage drinking. Dad let them check it out and alcohol was found, dad was arrested, facing 44 counts!

Saw the interview on Today, parents seem really "upstanding" and responsible. Seems like bad luck that could happen to anyone??? Or no? I have a three year old and a baby, I don't know. And I'd hate to think that parents are going to be scared to host teens because of this, and have them go somewhere else.

http://losaltos.patch.com/articles/the-party-is-over-teenaged-drinking-poses-risk-to-parents

44 counts isn't "some friends" -- it's a party.

I assume that's one count per underage drinker.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This isn't scary. This happens often but isn't reported. You have to make it very clear to your kids, "no alcohol!" My parents always told me growing up that if kids brought alcohol over, they could be arrested. They are the parents. They are in charge! Sorry. I bet their son feels bad for not speaking up.

How's the view from high on the horse? It's possible the teen son didn't know about the alcohol. It's possible friends snuck the alcohol into the house. It's possible the kids snuck beer from a case in the garage. It's possible the son was totally clueless to the alcohol. You can say you "won't tolerate" alcohol in your home, and you can mean it, you can check on the kids in the basement, etc. But the kids are in your basement. You can't watch them 100% of the time or know what they're doing 100% of the time.

It's also possible that he was trying to be the cool dad and got busted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is so scary! We were just talking about it the other day. I said I'd rather our DD to taste alcohol at home under our watch then try it on the street. DH jumped on my throat about this exact scenario and I laughed it off saying it's impossible.

I guess he was right.

Avoid jail. Underage drinking is underage drinking. I knew a mom of a boy in my HS who was arrested for smoking pot with her son and a couple of his friends. If it is against the law, don't do it.

Don't get me wrong here. I'd never do it with my child's friends! It's a family issue and it's for DD's sake only!

I've sipped from my mom's glass on occasion and those few tries were more than enough to keep me from drinking elsewhere. I thought it was a good solution for the problem

DH doesn't drink.

Obviously, the law doesn't care whose teenager is consumig alcohol. You should follow example of DH of, at the very least, stop drinking around your children.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I so admire the parents' response to this: they're definitely taking the high road (no pun intended) by using the experience as an object lesson for opening a dialogue about teen drinking.

Honestly, I don't understand why this case somehow got national attention (Today Show) over the many others I found while googling the subject. Is it a statutory thing where some states enforce the rules and others don't?

On a practical level - what do you do? I have a 14 year old who goes to parties in our neighborhood (Brooklyn - it's easy to get around and kids do that). What is the best answer? Strip searching? No parties? Metal detectors at the door?

He is, was now, possibly), a professor at Stanford. That's why it's getting so much attention. I'm betting that he will get a slap on the wrist and a fine. If this were my son, you can bet he'd learn a lesson and he be confined to house for a year.

[Anonymous]

If the officers 'asked' to come in - he didn't have to let them in, clearly. without a warrant or exigent circumstances an officer cannot enter the house. So either 1) the officer saw an underage kid through the door with alcohol and entered 2) the father really didn't know or 3) the father is dumb and/or the officers lied to him to gain entrance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the officers 'asked' to come in - he didn't have to let them in, clearly. without a warrant or exigent circumstances an officer cannot enter the house. So either 1) the officer saw an underage kid through the door with alcohol and entered 2) the father really didn't know or 3) the father is dumb and/or the officers lied to him to gain entrance.

My guess is the dad cooperated and didn't think there was alcohol. I also agree with a PP that a neighbor who felt slighted at some point called to complain. That is scary to me - I would hope my neighbors would contact me first. We all have a good relationship at least I think!!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If the officers 'asked' to come in - he didn't have to let them in, clearly. without a warrant or exigent circumstances an officer cannot enter the house. So either 1) the officer saw an underage kid through the door with alcohol and entered 2) the father really didn't know or 3) the father is dumb and/or the officers lied to him to gain entrance.

There's an infinite number of possibilities. Our neighbor's party was busted when one of the teens called 911 from the basement. Parents allowed the police in because they didn't permit or know about the beer. Those parents have a hearing next month.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This isn't scary. This happens often but isn't reported. You have to make it very clear to your kids, "no alcohol!" My parents always told me growing up that if kids brought alcohol over, they could be arrested. They are the parents. They are in charge! Sorry. I bet their son feels bad for not speaking up.

I'm guessing you have no experience with teens?

If you do, however, your outlook is very simplistic. So unless you're living on 50 acres in Montana while homeschooling your kids, I don't think you're being realistic.

No, I was a teenager. My parents absolutely drove home the point that they were responsible for all of my friends in our house. The law doesn't stop at your front door. They also said they could get sued and lose everything. They drilled it into my head and it made me not invite friends over that couldn't follow the rules. I had been to other house parties and saw how the kids treated the house (putting cigarettes out on the floor and couches). I also knew many kids doing cocaine and heroin (remember heroin chic in the early 90s?). At the end of the day, if you talk with your kids and explain why things are not allowed, your child, hopefully, will get a clue. Perhaps your parents didn't have this conversation or mayerbe you didn't care. Not all teenagers are irresponsible and stupid .

Really? Please raise a few teenagers and get them off to college, then report back. Having been a teenager and raising a teenager is not the same.

[Anonymous]

The legal system in this country is so wrong.

17 year olds cannot drink alcohol. And if they do, it's always someone else's fault.

[Anonymous]

44 counts?! Please. You're buying his "I didn't know." Give me a break. I didn't know there were 44 kids drinking beer.

[Anonymous]

I highly doubt dad didn't know they were drinking.

And neither I or any of my siblings or any of our friends ever brought alcohol into our house. It is possible to raise kids that respect their parents and the house rules or to at least fear the repercussions to the point they they comply.

[Anonymous]

I feel bad beause it doesn't sound like Stanford dad was condoning alcohol. However, the Professor should know better than to let the cops in his house without a warrant.