On Metro - do you offer your seat to pregnant women?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I am 8 months pregnant and I get offered a seat about half the time. And the vast majority of time it is other WOMEN offering the seat, not the young able-bodied men sitting in the handicapped seats playing with their iPods or Blackberries or reading a newspaper & pretending not to notice me.

Totally agree with this. I am 10 days from delivery and although I am usually offered a seat when I am standing, it is ALWAYS by other women. Not once in my noticible pregnancy months has a man offered his seat. Not once! The thing is, I usually dont take the seat as I sit all day and don't mind stretching and standing for a few stops until the train empties a bit but it never fails to amaze me how oblivious some guys are. My goal as a mom-to-be of a boy is to teach him proper manners, if nothing else.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Thing is there's enough pregnant women who'll get offended to make folks gun-shy about offering.

I have had a lot of discussions with pregnant women about this and have never heard any way that she'd be offended at being offered a seat.

I agree. I've heard this argument before, yet I've also never met a pregnant woman that doesn't appreciate a bit of kindness or chivalry.

[Anonymous]

Yes, I always offer a seat to a pregnant woman, an older person, a woman carrying a child in her arms, etc. I'm from the midwest. People are just ruder out here. The only men that ever offered me a seat when I was pregnant were either from another country or the midwest. I always asked them where they were from. I agree women offer up more seats then men. Chivalry is dead.

[Anonymous]

No brainer. Of course I do!!

Also, when I was very pregnant and no one offered me a seat, I actually asked a man for his. He was sitting in the handicapped row by the door and I thought it was obscenely rude that he did not offer. So I asked and he got up. Take charge, ladies!!

[Anonymous]

I don't know about the whole men not offering seats thing - plenty of times I had men jump up and offer me a seat as soon as I got on the train. I will say that this happened most often on the green line, and very much less often on the red line.

[Anonymous]

The other day a young man offered me his seat - it was very sweet. He couldn't have been older than 16.

[Anonymous]

I'm white, and I observed that African-American men were considerably more likely to offer me a seat when I was pregnant than white men were.

[Anonymous]

I would. But I admit, I did not fully comprehend how much pregnancy can wear a person out until I got pregnant. I mean my friends talked about being tired, but I didn't really get how fully exhausted it was - I just assumed it was just like being a little fat (I know, I'm an idiot). So I think that men don't often give up their seats because they just don't get it. I think if they were pregnant for a day, they'd be jumping out of their seats!

My husband would give up his seat ot a pregnant woman in a heartbeat if he was sure she was pregnant. But he is often afraid of offending a non-pregnant, but looks pregnant, woman. Especially if she is several people over (where you can't just appear to be offering the seat out of kindness to a stranger).

But to give some credit to the men, women lie. I can't tell you how many women told m that pregnancy was this wonderful thing and they felt great the whole time - until I got pregnant. Then they told me the truth. They felt horrible. So how are men suppose to understand if we cover it up?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would. But I admit, I did not fully comprehend how much pregnancy can wear a person out until I got pregnant. I mean my friends talked about being tired, but I didn't really get how fully exhausted it was - I just assumed it was just like being a little fat (I know, I'm an idiot). So I think that men don't often give up their seats because they just don't get it. I think if they were pregnant for a day, they'd be jumping out of their seats!

You don't think the older men didn't have pregnant wives at some point? Even before I was pregnant and knew about feeling tired, it looked tiring when I watched pregnant women lumbering around with all that weight in front.

[Anonymous]

So how are men suppose to understand if we cover it up?

LOL! Now it's OUR fault because we don't complain enough about how uncomfortable we are!

[Anonymous]

If men are raised in proper homes -- they just know it is the proper thing to do -- to offer a seat to a pregnant woman, ederly person, etc. The problem is not enough homes are teaching manners these days.

[Anonymous]

I don't get the argument that people are worried about offending someone if they turn out to be just fat and not pregnant. You obviously aren't going to say "Hey there preggo! Want my seat?" Just offer the fucking seat. Especially if you are a man, people will assume you are offering it because she's a woman, not because she's pregnant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't know about the whole men not offering seats thing - plenty of times I had men jump up and offer me a seat as soon as I got on the train. I will say that this happened most often on the green line, and very much less often on the red line.

I also ride the Green line, and have found that on that line both men and women are more likely to offer their seats to a pregnant women. On buses even more people will offer their seats. I took the bus nearly every day when I was pregnant, and can think of exactly one time when I wasn't offered a seat (no asking necessary!).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm white, and I observed that African-American men were considerably more likely to offer me a seat when I was pregnant than white men were.

same here, and also men from foreign countries or obvious tourists. Also I always got offered a seat whenever I rode the bus. Metro was another story

[Anonymous]

same here, and also men from foreign countries or obvious tourists. Also I always got offered a seat whenever I rode the bus. Metro was another story

I think tourists are the WORST. I have NEVER seen a tourist offer a seat to anyone - not to me (hugely pregnant), an elderly person, etc. And I ride the Orange Line at rush hour and have seen, plenty of times, tourists who allow their middle school / teenage children to occupy the handicapped seats while seniors & pregnant women stand there. Maybe they're not familiar with our Metro system and its rules, but manners are manners.