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On Metro - do you offer your seat to pregnant women?
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Anonymous
| Saw a heavily pregnant woman (probably full-term) standing on a crowded train this morning right next to all of the seats that are supposed to be available for people with disabilities. It was several stops before anyone bothered to offer her a seat. Does this strike anyone else as really bad form? |
Anonymous
Absolutely. I always offer to pregnant women or the elderly. I might even say something to the people sitting down, depending on my mood and how scary they look.... Prediction, this may deteriorate into a debate of "there's nothing wrong with a pregnant woman" and, "she chose to be pregnant" etc. |
Anonymous
| YES! |
Anonymous
| Thing is there's enough pregnant women who'll get offended to make folks gun-shy about offering. When I did the Metro I'd offer to anyone over 50 and sometimes even any female if I were feeling particularly generous. |
Anonymous
| Only if she is undeniably pregnant. There are plenty of women who look it, but just need to go on a diet, and I don't want to embarrass us both. |
Anonymous
I do offer when I know definitely that she is pregnant. There are plenty of fat women and for those I have to stare a little at their tummy to see if they are preggers or just overeaters. I have also noticed that men do NOT offer their seats as frequently as women. |
Anonymous
| OP here - there was no question as to whether this was weight gain or pregnancy (seriously - she appeared full-term). As for whether it's a true disability etc. etc., there's a risk of falling or someone falling on her, even if she's generally fine and capable of standing for 15 minutes. For what it's worth, I'm also 6 months pregnant and nobody offered me a seat either, but I was less worried for my own safety because 6 months is very different than 9. But I do agree there's a fine line when you're looking at someone who has a bump of unknown origin. |
Anonymous
| I'm not surprised that you saw this. I can't count on the fingers of one hand the number of times no one offered me a seat on the train while I was heavily pregnant. Most of them would pretend they did not see me by covering their faces with newspapers or books. On one occasion, an elderly lady gave me her seat and loudly expressed her disappointment in the present generation that would allow a heavily pregnant woman to stand on the metro. |
Anonymous
| Yes! I have offered my seat and will continue to offer my seat. When I was pregnant, a man made a big show of jumping up to offer me the seat for those with disabilities. I thanked him, but took another seat that was open (there were plenty open, btw). He got really mad and started going off on me. I guess he thought I dissed him, and maybe it appeared so, but my thinking was that why not leave that particular seat open for someone who would need it more than I? |
Anonymous
My very favorite people are those (always women) who would see me standing and loudly proclaim: "Someone give that pregnant woman a seat!" It happened multiple times. I need to get up the nerve to start doing that, myself. When I'm pregnant I'm also not shy about asking for a priority seat if I see someone seeminlgy able-bodied sitting in one and there's noplace else to sit. |
Anonymous
|
I really don't understand the "choice" argument. We choose to exercise and may get a broken bone as a result, for example. Doesn't mean I don't deserve a seat just because my leg was broken while doing something voluntary!
It upsets me so much when no one offers. EVERYONE has been/will be/is touched in their lives by a pregnant woman. Something like 85% of all women will go on to become mothers in some way. ALL of us are here because our mothers were pregnant. We all have sisters or best friends or wives who have been or will be pregnant. It's just the right thing to do. Pregnancy is necessary for us humans to continue on this planet! Show some respect for the ones who are popping out your future social security contributers. |
Anonymous
|
If I see them I will.
However usually I'm buried behind people and if I get a seat I usually fall asleep. If you see me and you're pregnant, feel free to wake me and ask for my seat. |
Anonymous
| I do when I'm not pregnant myself. The other day I got on and stood next to a lady who immediately offered me her seat (I was six months pregnant at the time). I was so grateful as I had 10 stops to go. |
Anonymous
| I am 8 months pregnant and I get offered a seat about half the time. And the vast majority of time it is other WOMEN offering the seat, not the young able-bodied men sitting in the handicapped seats playing with their iPods or Blackberries or reading a newspaper & pretending not to notice me. |
Anonymous
I have had a lot of discussions with pregnant women about this and have never heard any way that she'd be offended at being offered a seat. When I was pregnant, sometimes I was offered a seat, sometimes not. When offered, I took it if I needed it (i.e, I didn't necessarily take it at 6 months pregnant but did at 8-9 months pregnant!). Most often women offered me the seat. Very rarely did men offer me a seat. When I needed a seat and wasn't offered, I started trying to catch people's eye. If that didn't work, I asked for a seat (from those in the seats for people with disabilities). Nobody ever refused. Seriously, offer pregnant women a seat! |