Single dad by choice
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
SMBC is much easier as all the woman needs is sperm. SFBC requires a gestational carrier, a lot more money, and everything that goes with surrogacy. I am sure also it is harder to find a surrogate for a SFBC as well. |
Anonymous
+1 I support this (females too having their own) as long as nannies aren't doing ALL the parenting 24/7 and the children are statement pieces. You should be a very involved/hands on parent to do this. |
Anonymous
I love this-not the money he spend as much as the time and energy he put into supporting her. It's so beautiful. |
Anonymous
Not just her, she has 4 siblings. |
Anonymous
Do we not see the gross inequities that can come when rich people are able to spend millions of dollars not just creating designer babies, but making them into superhuman talents? |
Anonymous
Such limited thinking PP. "Children deserve both a mother and a father." Sometimes it's not possible and this is far from a perfect world. I'd rather discuss how much time, money and energy these single parents put into parenthood, a child that is wanted SO much then about the *plethora* of children in the planet who were "whoopsies", who get little to no attention at all, no support, love, affection because parents are very uninterested or too busy working to pay for their "whoopsies." |
Anonymous
+1M God think about all the people we know that just willy nilly didn't plan on children, didn't use birth control and had the attitude of "if happens it happens," and just had kids like this. That's not "want" that's laziness or indifference it's not the same. |
Anonymous
Going to guess he funds the other kids hobbies and interests equally at his tax bracket. |
Anonymous
She said in an interview that the 2026 Olympics was the first time her siblings had ever seen her skate live. Seems strange. She also said that she when she quit when she was 16 it was because she wanted the experience of living at home with them as a family. (She must have lived away from home to train?) None of the other kids seem to be in competitive sports. She has a sister who is 2 years younger and then triplet siblings who are 4 years younger. She seems close to her siblings now. |
Anonymous
Amazing! |
Anonymous
|
The problem is that when women go the surrogacy route it's often assumed and implied that she got tired off waiting for a potential husband and had "no choice" but to do because she wants to be a mother.
Men don't get to enjoy the same benefit of the doubt. I think it's safe to say that our society thinks (or maybe assumes) that any man who wants to be a dad will find plenty of women. I'm not sure this is true. Women are more picky today because they don't need to depend on men as much as they used to. So, there are men who want children but unfortunately can't find any woman to be with them. |
Anonymous
|
I find it really sad that people are so hung up about their "genes' or whatever that they don't foster kids who already dont have parents and give them a loving home. I LOVE babies but they are only babies for a little while. I find people who adopt out of foster care to be much more admirable, especially with the sort of financial capacity this man has.
I mean more power to him and how he chose to parent and I think we need to put more emphasis on how fatherhood is a meaningful exercise and support fathers but people who become parents through surrogacy aren't admirable. they aren't doing a good deed. they are just following their biological or emotional or whatever imperative. people who adopt kids out of the foster care system are admirable- not ppl who are looking for babies through adoption agencies, they are just coping with infertility just like the ivf people, and that is hard but it doesn't make your journey admirable- but people who actually do the work of repairing the world through giving a stable home and supportive environment to a homeless child. |
Anonymous
| So other articles dispute this. "Their mother, Yan Qingxin "Mary", continued to serve as their legal guardian after she and Arthur divorced." They in fact have a mother. |
Anonymous
A little deeper dive. Arthur was married to Mary at the time when the Alyssa was born. It isn't clear when they divorced but it seems they were still together when the other 4 were born. However the kids were conceived via IVF and carried via surrogate and only Arthur's children. The wife Mary did not adopt them but had legal guardianship for when they were with her. It seems that she did have the younger 4 kids whenever Arthur and Alysa were away for training and competitions. The younger four stayed with Mary. It seems Arthur was always the 'primary' parent but that Mary was pretty involved and the kids called her mom right up until at least a few years ago (hard to find anything recent). Mary has wanted privacy and hasn't done interviews and Alyssa doesn't really talk about it - which could be at her request or Alyssa may not be as close as she was away training / skating and not staying with her. |
Anonymous
He wasn't always wealthy. Alysa talks about how they all lived in a 1-bedroom apartment, and all the kids shared a room with bunk beds. I think he's done an amazing job with her and her siblings. He started out as a tiger dad, which many of us can relate to, and then when she asked for space, he backed off, let her quit, let her find herself, and transitioned to his new role as a supportive dad in the background. From what I know about her dad, I love the guy. Aysa talks about how close she is to her and her siblings, too. He is raising 5 kids and working as an immigration lawyer, helping his community. He's truly an impressive person. |