If you have duds for kids, is it a reversion back to family history or an outlier?

[Anonymous]

Look up regression to the mean

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WTF is a "dud" child?

Failure to launch

My kid has some disabilities that require a longer runway to launch. That doesn't make her a "dud."

+1000

[Anonymous]

shirtsleeves to shirtsleeves

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If your children turned out to be duds or on the path towards that, is it just reverting back to your family history or are they an outlier/step down?

Obama, Steve Jobs, Jeff Bezzos, all had dud fathers yet became the dudest dudes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If your children turned out to be duds or on the path towards that, is it just reverting back to your family history or are they an outlier/step down?

Obama, Steve Jobs, Jeff Bezzos, all had dud fathers yet became the dudest dudes.

They all had good moms and (step)dads

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a brother in prison, but I wouldn’t call him a dud. His birth parents were substance abusers and he was born addicted. He qualified for a lot services from birth, but many weren’t well done and there was a significant amount of household instability undermining everything. I was out of the house by then with a child of my own so I wasn’t involved in a way that might have made a difference.

I would say he’s the outlier though because all five other kids are law abiding as are his two bio siblings on either side of his birth. He is just brain damaged enough to lack impulse control but not enough to legally not be accountable. He likes prison because it is highly structured and he has limited choices.

Only two other relatives have ever been in trouble with the law and one of those was arrested for a Civil Rights Era sit in.

Is he adopted? It might be a genetic propensity for criminal behavior and susceptibility to substance abuse disorders. Sometimes you can do everything right and kids still end up struggling in life because they are genetically unlucky.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:WTF is a "dud" child?

Failure to launch

My kid has some disabilities that require a longer runway to launch. That doesn't make her a "dud."

I really appreciate how you framed this! You sound like an amazing parent who is giving your daughter everything she needs to thrive in her own time.

[Anonymous]

What defines a dud? I have two siblings who are unmarried and broke in their 30’s but seem generally happy. They were on track to have normal white collar careers but pivoted in their 20’s to follow their dreams. Their lives are unstable though and usually whenever s*** happens they have to ask family for money

[Anonymous]

I am the dud, and I am an outlier/step down.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Calling your kid a dud makes you the dud

Amen

[Anonymous]

It was easier to be a dud back in the day, now society is more demanding.

And dud is mean, most people are average....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kids are dudes from a long line of dudes.

May they abide.

👏 🏆

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Calling your kid a dud makes you the dud

Agree. Maybe OP doesn't see the apple right next to the tree

[Anonymous]

Ex’s family: grandma had two sons, one a dud, one normal. The normal one had two sons, one normal, one a dud but reformed.
My side: my father with dud like tendencies, had a son a daughter, son and his kids are fine, daughter’s kid has dud like tendencies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What defines a dud? I have two siblings who are unmarried and broke in their 30’s but seem generally happy. They were on track to have normal white collar careers but pivoted in their 20’s to follow their dreams. Their lives are unstable though and usually whenever s*** happens they have to ask family for money

In my opinion this defines a “dud”. But unfortunately majority or young adults fall in this category