80 yo dad married undocumented housekeeper 6 months after my mother’s death

[Anonymous]

Contact an elder law attorney in your fathers area. https://www.naela.org/Web/Web/NAELA-Home.aspx

[Anonymous]

Sounds like exploitation. I’d call
Area agency on aging. They can investigate.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes her “very shady” aside from your perception? I don’t think there’s much you can do, in any case.

She was the housekeeper from two different overseas nations and ended up here as a domestic servant. Her two prior husbands (one in Middle East, one in Philippines are dead), and she has like 10-15 different fb profiles with contradictory information. She had lied to my father about easily confirmed facts (where her children lie/work etc). She is also wearing a large diamond ring and he is acting uncharacteristically. It’s like someone took my dad and replaced him with an incredibly stupid and unkind old man who looks like him. I’m blindsided by his idiocy, his arrogance, and his apparent plan to leave his entire estate to this pirate.

If she was an undocumented person with no citizenship papers, what would happen if I call police or file a report to ICE or APS? Could she get deported? Is marriage fraud a crime?

A green card marriage is illegal. But if she's a US citizen, getting married for money is not illegal.

She was definitely not a us citizen at the time of their wedding. I don’t know if being married to him confers automatic citizenship or not. I’m asking if she is someone ICE would be interested in or not. I believe she is controlling his phone email and accounts. Is this not illegal?

You want someone sent to a concentration camp because your dad is acting oddly?

[Anonymous]

I have a friend going through something similar except the housekeeper was the one who worked for them for 20+ years before the wife died and presumably legal.

I’d contact ICE and contact an elder abuse attorney. I’d specifically ask if you could have him declared incompetent as he doesn’t seem fit to make legal decisions.

[Anonymous]

OP I understand how you feel. I think you need to go visit your Dad for a long weekend or more. Talk to him and see what he says. Get a feel for what is happening. It is odd that he is pulling away from you but you need to understand why. If he won't talk to you when the new wife is there maybe take him out to lunch? He has not forgotten that last 50 years of being your Dad. But do let him talk to you without judgement. Before you bring anyone else in like Adult Protective Services you need to give your Dad a chance to explain what he is thinking.

[Anonymous]

Also, take screenshots of all her various social media pages so you have evidence of her lies to support elder abuse claims.

[Anonymous]

Gather evidence. Call ICE.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What makes her “very shady” aside from your perception? I don’t think there’s much you can do, in any case.

She was the housekeeper from two different overseas nations and ended up here as a domestic servant. Her two prior husbands (one in Middle East, one in Philippines are dead), and she has like 10-15 different fb profiles with contradictory information. She had lied to my father about easily confirmed facts (where her children lie/work etc). She is also wearing a large diamond ring and he is acting uncharacteristically. It’s like someone took my dad and replaced him with an incredibly stupid and unkind old man who looks like him. I’m blindsided by his idiocy, his arrogance, and his apparent plan to leave his entire estate to this pirate.

If she was an undocumented person with no citizenship papers, what would happen if I call police or file a report to ICE or APS? Could she get deported? Is marriage fraud a crime?

So go to the police then instead of crowdsourcing here. Duh. 🙄

[Anonymous]

Op, chances that you are crazy are so much bigger than someone being after the old man's money. How old is the housekeeper? How long have they know each other? If she arrived illegally, she will not get the papers any time soon.
The money your dad had before marriage is still his. He could have left the money to her without getting married. I don't see what the big deal is.

[Anonymous]

Need to speak to a proper lawyer, not advice on here. As you can see, some people are triggered.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Need to speak to a proper lawyer, not advice on here. As you can see, some people are triggered.

Including OP. Her xenophobic little mind shouldn't be going to deportation and calling ICE. Just because the wife is a foreigner, and a liar on social media, doesn't make her an illegal immigrant.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Need to speak to a proper lawyer, not advice on here. As you can see, some people are triggered.

Including OP. Her xenophobic little mind shouldn't be going to deportation and calling ICE. Just because the wife is a foreigner, and a liar on social media, doesn't make her an illegal immigrant.

Says the triggered

I'd do the same in OP's place. Doing everything I can to keep a fortune hunter away from a sad and lonely elderly father. Knew of a similar story though woman in question was firmly American. It was devastating to the family because she was blocking the children's attempts to see him and when he was dying in the hospital the nurses confirmed that he kept asking for his children but was told by 2nd wife they were refusing to come but the children didn't even know.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:He should have not exploited her as a housekeeper. He should have hired a legal helper and paid a fair wage. Karma!

This. It's why you don't hire undocumented household helpers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He should have not exploited her as a housekeeper. He should have hired a legal helper and paid a fair wage. Karma!

This. It's why you don't hire undocumented household helpers.

She's probably not undocumented. OP has no way to know, but her xenophobia is certainly doing a lot of heavy lifting in this story.

[Anonymous]

Only white women are allowed to marry old guys for money?