Boyfriend is celibate until marriage

Anonymous
DH here. Is third base OK?

I wasn’t a wait until marriage type, but as it happened, the first girl I went all the way with was the one I married.

Still good after more than a decade.
Anonymous
He would not be the boyfriend for me. I want to know the sex is good way before engagement or moving in together, let alone before marriage. So, I'd break up with him.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You don’t deserve him. Respect.


Would you be fine being in a new multi year relationship and never having sex? Never knowing what sex is like before you marry that person?


I’d be fine with this, because sex changes over time. Hopefully it gets better every time because both of you care to make it that way.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Well, at least he will likely want to marry soon rather than serial date. Would you want to marry him? Is he caring, kind, smart, attractive, good job, shared values and beliefs? If he is the whole package, go take a cold shower.


except, are his fingers short? I would want a sneak peak at whats in store


If that's make or break territory for you, then you might want to try some Kegels and Ben Wa thingies.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:He’s gay


This
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:I’m seeing this guy I really like who told me he has decided to be celibate until marriage. I’ve been trying to be understanding but it is getting pretty hard for me to not want sex with him. I think about sex constantly. I don’t know if I can do this..


Dump him and move on. He’s not considerate of your needs. This will be a pattern if you marry him. Save yourself now.


Here's your answer.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Well, at least he will likely want to marry soon rather than serial date. Would you want to marry him? Is he caring, kind, smart, attractive, good job, shared values and beliefs? If he is the whole package, go take a cold shower.


I’m human. I want sex. We have been together 8 months and man it’s hard. He is a really great guy but he is not fast tracking marriage. His ideal timeline is marriage in 2-3 years.

He’s just not that into you. If he is celibate really liked you he would have popped the question AT LEAST 2 months ago, or sooner and you’d already be married and having sex by now.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:DH here. Is third base OK?

I wasn’t a wait until marriage type, but as it happened, the first girl I went all the way with was the one I married.

Still good after more than a decade.


No sex at all. We haven’t even seen each other naked. He doesn’t want any kind of sex. Only kissing. Not even touching.
Anonymous
Are there other things you can do without PIV or is all that off the table? Intimacy and pleasure can be had/felt without sex.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Well, at least he will likely want to marry soon rather than serial date. Would you want to marry him? Is he caring, kind, smart, attractive, good job, shared values and beliefs? If he is the whole package, go take a cold shower.


I’m human. I want sex. We have been together 8 months and man it’s hard. He is a really great guy but he is not fast tracking marriage. His ideal timeline is marriage in 2-3 years.

He’s just not that into you. If he is celibate really liked you he would have popped the question AT LEAST 2 months ago, or sooner and you’d already be married and having sex by now.


Not everyone waiting for sex gets married right away. They have only been together for 8 months. Marriage is a serious decision. Not everyone gets married on a whim and is okay with just get a divorce when they no longer feel like being married.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You don’t deserve him. Respect.


Would you be fine being in a new multi year relationship and never having sex? Never knowing what sex is like before you marry that person?


NP. That was me and my spouse. Married 30 years.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Are there other things you can do without PIV or is all that off the table? Intimacy and pleasure can be had/felt without sex.


Nothing besides kissing. He has found Christ as he says and decided sex is off the table. He doesn’t want to rush marriage because he doesn’t believe in divorce. He wants to make sure he is 100% compatible with whomever he marries.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You don’t deserve him. Respect.


Would you be fine being in a new multi year relationship and never having sex? Never knowing what sex is like before you marry that person?


NP. That was me and my spouse. Married 30 years.


Well not everyone wants to be celibate.
Anonymous
Unless he's very religious, I would be concerned at what he's hiding.
Anonymous
This would be a deal breaker for me. I'd at least need to see the goods/play with them and determine the attraction. Sex isn't a big deal unless it's a big deal. And what you don't know can be a big deal.
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