If your children reject your beliefs, do you question yourself and your sanity

[Anonymous]

So, they had a horrible upbringing based on crazy religious beliefs…and you are shocked they made a complete 180 when adults?

Hmm…no idea what happened here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:None of our kids attend church as adults, in fact they say our religion is a cult now. They were home schooled and attended church school. Their kids go to public school and don't regularly attend church. They drink alcohol and challenge godly teachings they were raised with. In fact they blame us and the church for a lot of their adult problems. I feel like coming back to church would help these problems, but they reject it. It makes me question what was it all for.

Anyone's adult kids come back around to the church in time?

It was all “for” some crazy ideas you had about how to raise your kids…it wasn’t for them, it was for you.

It’s comical…are you saying if you had to do it all over and knew your kids would have rejected this craziness, that you would have sent them to public school and skipped church? I doubt it.

[Anonymous]

IMO religious indoctrination by homeschooling to keep them away from people who aren’t in your religious is abusive.

Homeschooling is fine but when it’s done to isolate, control, and imprison your kids it’s abusive. Homeschooling done by someone who they themselves are not educated is abusive. You may have robbed your children of basic learning opportunities and a normal childhood.

OP you don’t sound mentally ill but you do sound like an abusive parent. You chose what is best for your religious group or cult over what was best for your children.

[Anonymous]

You tried to indoctrinate them and they saw through the scam.

Good for them.

[Anonymous]

Your relationship with religion is your own. Your adult children get to choose their own path. Their path isn’t wrong. They’re telling you their religious upbringing was unhealthy for them so they broke away. That’s 100% their right. DH and I are catholic and Jewish but our kids were raised Jewish. One is agnostic even though I raised her Jewish and that’s ok with me. It doesn’t make me question her choice or my religion. We taught our kids to question everything so in a way this makes me feel proud of her. My goal has never been indoctrination. DH calls himself catholic but hasn’t set foot in a church as long as I’ve known him. We have friends who tell him he’s not a real Catholic. Who are we to judge anybody else’s relationship with G-d?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, they had a horrible upbringing based on crazy religious beliefs…and you are shocked they made a complete 180 when adults?

Hmm…no idea what happened here.

Love this

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You tried to indoctrinate them and they saw through the scam.

Good for them.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The reality is that your children are adults and they have free will. As long as they are upstanding citizens, don’t break the law and love and care for their family, I wouldn’t lament about this. You pressuring them will not help or change them.

-signed a Catholic

Agree

Just drop it.

[Anonymous]

Virginia baptist pastor, David Schneider, has been arrested on 19 counts of child rape.


OO your views are seriously lacking thank god your children have brains

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:None of our kids attend church as adults, in fact they say our religion is a cult now. They were home schooled and attended church school. Their kids go to public school and don't regularly attend church. They drink alcohol and challenge godly teachings they were raised with. In fact they blame us and the church for a lot of their adult problems. I feel like coming back to church would help these problems, but they reject it. It makes me question what was it all for.

Anyone's adult kids come back around to the church in time?

OP, what was it all for, in your view?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:None of our kids attend church as adults, in fact they say our religion is a cult now. They were home schooled and attended church school. Their kids go to public school and don't regularly attend church. They drink alcohol and challenge godly teachings they were raised with. In fact they blame us and the church for a lot of their adult problems. I feel like coming back to church would help these problems, but they reject it. It makes me question what was it all for.

Anyone's adult kids come back around to the church in time?

OP, what was it all for, in your view?

Homeschooling was very difficult, lots of conflicts and fights daily. Also, the loss of one income was hard to recover from. It seems like a huge waste of time, money and energy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:None of our kids attend church as adults, in fact they say our religion is a cult now. They were home schooled and attended church school. Their kids go to public school and don't regularly attend church. They drink alcohol and challenge godly teachings they were raised with. In fact they blame us and the church for a lot of their adult problems. I feel like coming back to church would help these problems, but they reject it. It makes me question what was it all for.

Anyone's adult kids come back around to the church in time?

You can no longer force them to do things.

Accept that.

Make your own choices, based upon your own beliefs. Respect people who believe other things.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:None of our kids attend church as adults, in fact they say our religion is a cult now. They were home schooled and attended church school. Their kids go to public school and don't regularly attend church. They drink alcohol and challenge godly teachings they were raised with. In fact they blame us and the church for a lot of their adult problems. I feel like coming back to church would help these problems, but they reject it. It makes me question what was it all for.

Anyone's adult kids come back around to the church in time?

OP, what was it all for, in your view?

Homeschooling was very difficult, lots of conflicts and fights daily. Also, the loss of one income was hard to recover from. It seems like a huge waste of time, money and energy.

Sounds like an awful childhood all around. You are lucky they just rejected the church, and not you.

You probably meant well, but had been indoctrinated yourself. There were professional teachers who stood ready to educate your children, for free.
It was your choice to forgo that. Sounds like everyone regrets that now. Perhaps therapy can help you make peace with the choices you made.

[Anonymous]

Most of the people I know who homeschool are trying to "shelter" their children from things in the outside world that upset them (cursing, drugs/alcohol, human sexuality, etc). They do not realize that you cannot do that forever.

Eventually, your kids will be in a world that features all of these things. Part of your job is to teach them how to make decisions about such things. You did them a disservice by throwing them into the real world, with such a controlled range of exposures, fully grown.

[Anonymous]

You may find more people who can relate to how you are feeling OP, on the religion forum.