older teen (18) sexually active

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is an adult and got an easily curable illness that she has taken care of. It isn’t something to hide or tell. You know your husband won’t treat it that way, from your post, so I wouldn’t tell him. Your daughter can if she wants. But which part would add to his stress? The fact that she is sexually active (not surprising for an 18 year old who had a relationship) or that she got an infection? The infection is a non-issue. Treated, done, doesn’t need talking about any more than say, toenail fungus caught at the gym (which actually is super hard to cure).

Huh? Clearly she was not using condoms. She got an STI. Next time it could be HIV or herpes or hepatitis.
It's not a "toenail fungus.".

And no, I wouldn't tell my husband--now or in the summer unless she volunteers permission. It's her prerogative to tell him. I would 100% keep her confidence.
But it's not "nothing" and it's not a toenail fungus.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I wouldn’t share this with my husband. She can tell him if she wants to.

+1 this. She’s an adult and this is women’s stuff.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is an adult and got an easily curable illness that she has taken care of. It isn’t something to hide or tell. You know your husband won’t treat it that way, from your post, so I wouldn’t tell him. Your daughter can if she wants. But which part would add to his stress? The fact that she is sexually active (not surprising for an 18 year old who had a relationship) or that she got an infection? The infection is a non-issue. Treated, done, doesn’t need talking about any more than say, toenail fungus caught at the gym (which actually is super hard to cure).

Huh? Clearly she was not using condoms. She got an STI. Next time it could be HIV or herpes or hepatitis.
It's not a "toenail fungus.".

You can get chlamydia using condoms.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is an adult and got an easily curable illness that she has taken care of. It isn’t something to hide or tell. You know your husband won’t treat it that way, from your post, so I wouldn’t tell him. Your daughter can if she wants. But which part would add to his stress? The fact that she is sexually active (not surprising for an 18 year old who had a relationship) or that she got an infection? The infection is a non-issue. Treated, done, doesn’t need talking about any more than say, toenail fungus caught at the gym (which actually is super hard to cure).

Huh? Clearly she was not using condoms. She got an STI. Next time it could be HIV or herpes or hepatitis.
It's not a "toenail fungus.".

You can get chlamydia using condoms.

Highly unlikely. I work as an NP at Planned parenthood. It's far, FAR more likely that she had unprotected sex since she's on the pill.

This is just risky behavior--both in terms of STIs and pregnancy. Ideally all teens should use 2 forms of birth control. They are so darn fertile.

[Anonymous]

For all of you who are saying that OP shouldn't share this information with her DD's father: Would you feel the same if your son confided to his father about contracting an STD and dad similarly decided to keep it from you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For all of you who are saying that OP shouldn't share this information with her DD's father: Would you feel the same if your son confided to his father about contracting an STD and dad similarly decided to keep it from you?

Yeah, I'm fine with that. We are all entitled to privacy and to choose who we shared medical information with.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For all of you who are saying that OP shouldn't share this information with her DD's father: Would you feel the same if your son confided to his father about contracting an STD and dad similarly decided to keep it from you?

Yup, I’m ok with that.

The kid is 18 - a legal adult, headed to college. Not 14, where we’d need to figure out how we are going to handle/parent the kid, supervise, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For all of you who are saying that OP shouldn't share this information with her DD's father: Would you feel the same if your son confided to his father about contracting an STD and dad similarly decided to keep it from you?

My boys would never. But if they did DH is not some idiot and he is perfectly capable of handling a crisis

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:For all of you who are saying that OP shouldn't share this information with her DD's father: Would you feel the same if your son confided to his father about contracting an STD and dad similarly decided to keep it from you?

I might have a different perspective on this, because my mom shared my medical info with her sister and a cousin. I now censor what I share with her, and it is 20+ years later.

I would trust my DH to have the conversation *I* would be having with my child:

This was a wake up call. She is not having safe sex. She is not testing before sex. She is not having partners tested before sex. She isn't using condoms. She is LUCKY this is something that is minor and easily treated. This could have easily been herpes. Or drug resistant gonorrhea. Or whatever. Condoms EVERY time.

[Anonymous]

Don’t tell your DH and make an appointment for her with planned parenthood and give her some condoms!!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It's the kind of thing I'd tell my husband, but he's pretty mellow and would just be like "Okay, we need to hug her, then go over what medications she's supposed to take and remind her to finish the course even if she feels better, we need to tell her to tell the boy to get checked, etc."

Yes, OP, she should definitely stop telling her friends.

Same here. My husband and I tell each other everything parenting wise unless a kid specifically asks us not to. So since she doesn’t care I would tell. But he wouldn’t over react.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is her story to tell OP not yours.
She confided in you. Do not blow this.

X1000

[Anonymous]

Gross

[Anonymous]

Let it go. She was diagnosed with a a type of vaginitis identified as chlamydia, she was prescribed medicine and it’s all over.

He doesn’t need to know, you’re inserting drama into this. Don’t.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She is an adult and got an easily curable illness that she has taken care of. It isn’t something to hide or tell. You know your husband won’t treat it that way, from your post, so I wouldn’t tell him. Your daughter can if she wants. But which part would add to his stress? The fact that she is sexually active (not surprising for an 18 year old who had a relationship) or that she got an infection? The infection is a non-issue. Treated, done, doesn’t need talking about any more than say, toenail fungus caught at the gym (which actually is super hard to cure).

Huh? Clearly she was not using condoms. She got an STI. Next time it could be HIV or herpes or hepatitis.
It's not a "toenail fungus.".

You can get chlamydia using condoms.

Also you can get it by oral sex. It’s a common infection. She’s going off to live independently where she will meet plenty of new people all in her age range. You can help her with education and how to prevent this and other problems. That’s about it though. Keep it a conversation just between you and her and she will stay open to telling you things, maybe.