Married Female Feminists

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My husband is a feminist. My husband is the cook in our relationship. While I stayed home for maternity leave, there was about a year when he was a stay at home dad. He has always encouraged me to make my own decisions instead of telling me what I should do. He has acknowledged as a man he has privileges I don’t- he can go out at night without worrying, he gets taken seriously by car repair people on sight. He sees misogyny in what people say - most recently on Love is Blind. He encourages our daughters to indulge their interests even when they aren’t stereotypically “girlie” ones.

Are you CERTAIN your husband is a dude? Like penis, body hair, football, WWII documentaries on TV, the whole thing?

?!? Other than the penis, every other activity is an "interest" not an indicator as to whether somebody is male or female.. do you have some pretty narrow views.

[Anonymous]

Most men who are really good in bed are feminists. That's generally a good test.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a feminist who has chosen to be a stay at home mother.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are a happily married feminist, and your spouse is a man, what is your husband like? Are there traits or green flags that men can exhibit that would suggest that they would romantically pair well with a feminist?

If he earns significantly lower than you, would be more in tuned to your musing.

[Anonymous]

Only feminist I know, gets taken advantage of by his spouse in the name of equality. He does more than 70% of chores, childcare, home repairs, bills, shopping etc and has a professional six figure job. He also had to be SAHD until first kid went to pre-K.

[Anonymous]

I don't like labels.

[Anonymous]

My husband didn't expect that I'd fall in line and follow wherever my career took him, letting my own wither, but we also both agreed that family should take priority over careers. So we have both made compromises to stay physically together and both employed (instead of moving cross country to advance, which is common in our fields), and have now settled into relatively low-paying but fairly flexible careers with good work life balance. I think having those early discussions about shared values were key.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My husband is a feminist. My husband is the cook in our relationship. While I stayed home for maternity leave, there was about a year when he was a stay at home dad. He has always encouraged me to make my own decisions instead of telling me what I should do. He has acknowledged as a man he has privileges I don’t- he can go out at night without worrying, he gets taken seriously by car repair people on sight. He sees misogyny in what people say - most recently on Love is Blind. He encourages our daughters to indulge their interests even when they aren’t stereotypically “girlie” ones.

I doubt it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a professional graduate degree and have a great career. Am working on another degree currently for a career pivot when I want to slow down but still stay engaged and productive. I never planned on relying on a man for livelihood. I expect to contribute to my family, both financially and chore-wise.

Does this make me a feminist? I still like it when he buys me fresh flowers or plans a nice date night out. I look very feminine and dress as such.

DH helps out with stuff at home, with childcare, and works. I enjoy cooking and am better at it, so I do more of it. But he certainly will pitch in if I have a particularly busy week. We split up tasks based on who's better at it and make big decisions jointly. He knows when to back down when I feel strongly about something. I knew he would be a good partner for me when we were dating b/c he supported my ambitions and plans.

Women attend and graduate college more often than men in the United States now.

You are nothing special. In fact, you are part of the norm, rather than exceptional.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Only feminist I know, gets taken advantage of by his spouse in the name of equality. He does more than 70% of chores, childcare, home repairs, bills, shopping etc and has a professional six figure job. He also had to be SAHD until first kid went to pre-K.

Feminism was never about equality.

Feminism has always been about supremacy.

[Anonymous]

I have a 4-year degree beyond my college bachelor's degree and is well on my way to a 2nd degree beyond my college degree.

You don't seem like you know what you are talking about.

[Anonymous]

He grew up with a breadwinner father and a (mostly) SAHM (although she worked when the kids were older). His parents value and respect each other equally as partners and he and his siblings value and respect his parents equally. No resentment, no scorekeeping, no pettiness.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Only feminist I know, gets taken advantage of by his spouse in the name of equality. He does more than 70% of chores, childcare, home repairs, bills, shopping etc and has a professional six figure job. He also had to be SAHD until first kid went to pre-K.

Feminism was never about equality.

Feminism has always been about supremacy.

You sound terrified.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not sure what a feminist is... aren't we all feminists? Except those very few who want to abortion bans?

There are quite a few feminists who want abortion bans.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you are a happily married feminist, and your spouse is a man, what is your husband like? Are there traits or green flags that men can exhibit that would suggest that they would romantically pair well with a feminist?

Weirdly, my Arab Muslim husband was the one man I have dated who was fine with me just being me. That's really all I ask.