Men dating younger women gives me the ick

[Anonymous]

My in laws had a nearly twenty year age difference and I truly think they were soul mates. Was it hard on my MIL at his end when she was pretty much acting as a nurse? Sure, but she knew that going into it, and never had any regrets. To each their own but I’ve seen first hand that sometimes it works.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a 36F married to a 36M, two children. All of our friends and associates (mainly lawyers and other professionals) are in similar age appropriate relationships.
Recently I’ve observed a man we know from university, who has aged poorly due to stress of running his own law firm, posting his new younger (mid 20s ish) girlfriend all over social media. She looks like his little sister or niece and it gives me the ick. He is always posting photos of her in revealing clothing hanging all over him like she’s some trophy.
Older women dating younger men don’t seem to give me the same feeling. I’m wondering why that is? Is it because biologically there is much less likely to be children resulting from that type of match, while older men can impregnate younger women with their inferior sperm and have kids well past the age they should become fathers?
Is it because I feel bad for these attractive young women who should really be able to find a decent looking successful man their own age, and instead are settling for an older version?
Or am I having some sort of deep seated insecurities because this woman is younger and prettier than me? To be fair, I am not bad looking and still in decent shape after two kids. I’ve also never had any romantic interest in this man posting on social media.
Fascinating! I suppose I will see more of this type of situation as we get older.

For this to be the case, you would be similarly creeped out by age-matched 40 year olds TTC. Or a 40 year old woman with her inferior eggs being possibly impregnated by a 20 year old man.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man and I find older women with younger men incredibly creepy.

NP. Yeah I feel like the “cougar” stereotype is not a flattering one.

I have friends dating or even married to guys like ~5 years younger, which seems fine (my DH is 6 years older than me so I’m not opposed to a few years age gap). But at age 40 now I could not imagine going after a guy in his 20s if I were suddenly single. I think early 30s would be a limit for me and in general I find older guys more attractive. Like a fit, athletic mid-40s guy with close cropped facial hair (my DH) is my type, not some baby faced guy!

[Anonymous]

Op if you are not a troll, you are a mental case or just have toooooo much free time

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I’m a 36F married to a 36M, two children. All of our friends and associates (mainly lawyers and other professionals) are in similar age appropriate relationships.
Recently I’ve observed a man we know from university, who has aged poorly due to stress of running his own law firm, posting his new younger (mid 20s ish) girlfriend all over social media. She looks like his little sister or niece and it gives me the ick. He is always posting photos of her in revealing clothing hanging all over him like she’s some trophy.
Older women dating younger men don’t seem to give me the same feeling. I’m wondering why that is? Is it because biologically there is much less likely to be children resulting from that type of match, while older men can impregnate younger women with their inferior sperm and have kids well past the age they should become fathers?
Is it because I feel bad for these attractive young women who should really be able to find a decent looking successful man their own age, and instead are settling for an older version?
Or am I having some sort of deep seated insecurities because this woman is younger and prettier than me? To be fair, I am not bad looking and still in decent shape after two kids. I’ve also never had any romantic interest in this man posting on social media.
Fascinating! I suppose I will see more of this type of situation as we get older.

It is peculiar that you have given this so much thought.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m a 36F married to a 36M, two children. All of our friends and associates (mainly lawyers and other professionals) are in similar age appropriate relationships.
Recently I’ve observed a man we know from university, who has aged poorly due to stress of running his own law firm, posting his new younger (mid 20s ish) girlfriend all over social media. She looks like his little sister or niece and it gives me the ick. He is always posting photos of her in revealing clothing hanging all over him like she’s some trophy.
Older women dating younger men don’t seem to give me the same feeling. I’m wondering why that is? Is it because biologically there is much less likely to be children resulting from that type of match, while older men can impregnate younger women with their inferior sperm and have kids well past the age they should become fathers?
Is it because I feel bad for these attractive young women who should really be able to find a decent looking successful man their own age, and instead are settling for an older version?
Or am I having some sort of deep seated insecurities because this woman is younger and prettier than me? To be fair, I am not bad looking and still in decent shape after two kids. I’ve also never had any romantic interest in this man posting on social media.
Fascinating! I suppose I will see more of this type of situation as we get older.

For this to be the case, you would be similarly creeped out by age-matched 40 year olds TTC. Or a 40 year old woman with her inferior eggs being possibly impregnated by a 20 year old man.

You and OP are both deranged.

[Anonymous]

When I was 23 and working in hospital before med school, I remember an older man in a suit walking by me and giving me the up and down look. I thought he was a friend of my father (who also worked in the hospital) so I made eye contact, and it was immediately apparent that it was a leer, rather than a look. I was really taken aback, and pretty uncomfortable. I’d say this guy was early 40’s-ish.

I know some women report attraction to older men at that age, and to each his/her own. But honestly I think there’s something wrong there, on both ends, when I see those couples. There’s no commonality of life experience.

[Anonymous]

Maybe you should just mind your own business. If other people are happy, why is that a problem for you?

[Anonymous]

You’re way too old to say something gives you “the ick.” Did your husband pick that up h running around with younger women and that rubbed off on you?

[Anonymous]

I don’t care what adults do with each other. At some point, you have to take responsibility for your decisions - including who you date.

If you, at 21-22, want to date someone who is 40+, that’s on you. I don’t understand this trend of infantilizing women.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm a man and I find older women with younger men incredibly creepy.

Me too. It's weird (I'm a woman). I think a 10 year gap is OK, but 15 is pushing it.

I'm a man and a male friend of mine is married to a woman 15 years older - they are soulmates and perfect together. You can't control when you were born.

[Anonymous]

I'll let my 7 years older husband know about you. We'll avoid you going forward since we give you "the ick."

[Anonymous]

The advantage goes older women with younger men. 25 goes into 50 way more than 50 goes into 25. Do the math! 😉

[Anonymous]

My relative is 59 and I think her partner is in his early 40s. She's very good-looking and always has had tons of guys who were after her. He's attractive, but more like a 6, whereas she's a 9 (for her age). He pursued her. These days, it's becoming more obvious that she's older than him, but she's still the better looking one in the pair. I really don't see anything at all problematic about their pairing. Both and divorced and neither has kids, BTW. So, no need to deal with awkward situations with children being close in age to either partner.

[Anonymous]

The "ick" what are you five?